Could Have Had It All Chapter 5
Title: Could Have Had It All Bvts/Spn
Author: Noturbaby
Fandoms: Supernatural, Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Rating: PG-13 - R
Warnings: None (eventual het sex)
Pairings: Dean /Buffy, Sam/Dawn, Willow/Oz, Willow/Tara, Xander/Anya Most BtVS characters make an appearance.
Previously (links to earlier chapters)
Shiloh County Hospital 2004
Buffy gathered her nerves and walked into John Winchester's room. "We need to talk."
John bolted up in his bed. "Buffy? How the hell did you-?"
"Does it matter?" Buffy swallowed. "Dawn's number was in Dean's wallet, I guess." She crossed the room. "Dean's in trouble."
"I know. Sam told me about Dean crashing, but they revived him. He'll pull through, Dean's a fighter" John hoped to convince himself as much as her.
Buffy smiled tightly and nodded. "Yeah, I keep telling myself that, too. But Sam and Dawn spoke with him using a Ouija board. Dean's been seeing a reaper."
John took a moment to absorb that information. "A reaper," he repeated quietly.
"Do you know a way to stop one? To fight it?"
John lowered his head. "Don't think there is a way to stop one once it's your time."
"There has to be." They fell silent, consumed by their own fears.
Dean joined them, then. "Well, isn't this cozy?" He glared at Buffy then his father. "You knew she was alive and didn't tell me? Didn't you think I had the right to know?"
"Dean was always a good kid." John's voice was thick and he cleared his throat before he continued. "He took care of me and Sam. He held our family together." Buffy was surprised by John's show of emotion, but kept quiet. "Dean always did what I told him to, no questions asked. He always gave more than anyone and never complained." John looked up at her, regret shining in his eyes. "I, I shouldn't have made you stay away."
"You didn't make me do anything," Buffy replied quietly reassuring him. "I was in a bad place when Willow brought me back. I would have ruined what we had just to do it, just to hurt Dean because I was in so much pain."
Dean fumed as he listened to them. His anger grew so strong it was expanding from his spirit.
"If I was able to go back and..." Buffy couldn't finish. She was interrupted by a glass shattering against the wall. "Dean?" She gasped his name knowing he was the cause, knowing he was there, listening to them.
John stared at the pieces of broken glass and whispered, "I'm sorry."
"Not good enough," Dean said trying to control his anger. Bitter tears pricked his eyes as he turned to Buffy. "I would have done anything to have you back, to be with you." The light flickered overhead, and Dean left unable to look at either of them for a moment longer.
Buffy looked over at John. "He's so angry."
Sunnydale 2000
Faith groaned as she opened an eye to see where she was. She saw her body and Giles and knew Dean must have figured her out.
Buffy noticed the slight movements of their captive. "Don't get any ideas about going another round. Trust me, you won't like the outcome."
"Giles! I don't know what psycho-slayer has told you but-"
"Oh, shut up, Faith. We know it's you," the watcher replied sounding tired. "Now, you must listen. I will be able to change you two back, but it'd be easier if you told me what you used to cause the transformation."
"And why would I do that?"
"Because you're in serious danger. We both are," Buffy answered ignoring Faith's disbelieving smirk. "There's this group, the Initiative, I heard them say they want to give one of us to this creature they created. I don't even want to think what he would do with us. The other one they want to pass around like a party favor. Trust me neither one is a good option."
"I can handle myself, but it sounds like you got yourself in over your head again." Faith pulled at her restraints. "Don't see how this is my problem. I was on my way out of town."
Buffy bent down in front of the slayer wearing her body. "Look, I get that. I want you gone just as much. But, first, I want my body back and second you don't know who to trust." She stepped away and said, "Don't bother pulling on those restraints, only makes 'em tighter."
"What would you know of trust? What'd you do to make lover boy so angry? He catch you playing house with that Riley dork?"
"Never mind about Dean, it's none of your business." Buffy bit her lip well aware that Faith had been trying to anger her.
Giles opened the door to Xander and Anya. "Whoa, Giles, what's going on?" Xander subtly moved behind Anya. "Why is Buffy tied up and Faith free?"
The slayer that looked like Faith answered. "Faith somehow switched our bodies. I'm Buffy."
Still slightly hiding behind Anya, Xander asked, "How can we be sure?"
Buffy just rolled her eyes and sighed. "Xander, we need you to be here so you can help restrain Faith when we find the spell to switch us back."
Xander and Anya exchanged looks, but before either could ask another question, Willow and Tara arrived. The moment Tara looked at the real Buffy her eyes widened. "You're Buffy, aren't you?"
The relief on Faith's face made Willow smile. "Tara, this is Buffy, Buffy this is my," Willow paused as she realized the significance of what she was about to say. "My girlfriend, Tara. She knew that wasn't you right away," she added pointing to the Buffy that was tied to the chair.
"How?" Buffy asked curious and grateful at the same time.
"Your aura, right now it's all splintered and it's kind of like it's smashed into too small of a vessel."
"You can read auras? That's fascinating. I've always been interested in auras. Perhaps -"
"Giles! You and Tara can talk auras after we get me back to normal. Willow, do you know any spell that can reverse this?" Buffy asked.
"Um, well no, I don't. Giles, what have you found out so far?" Willow asked looking at the book Giles was studying.
"Actually, I haven't had much of a chance to look at anything since Faith woke up. Faith hasn't said what she used and Dean didn't say anything, did he?"
Buffy's "No." was drowned out by Willow's and Xander's "Dean?"
Buffy groaned, "Yeah, it seems Faith thought she could fool Dean and failed. He brought her here, then took off like he always does."
"Dean was here?" Willow asked. "That's got to mean something Buffy."
"It means nothing, Willow. If it did, he wouldn't have left."
"Who's Dean?" Tara whispered to Anya.
"Buffy's hot ex," she answered, decidedly not whispering back.
Tara thought for a moment. Buffy had a splintered aura and the Dean she met in the Magic Shop had a splintered aura, it couldn't be a coincidence. She took a tentative step forward. "Um, this Dean, is he tall, good looking, with freckles and green eyes?"
Every eye in the room looked at her. Faith smirked. "Hey, Red, looks like your girl swings both ways."
Tara blushed brightly, but she shook her head. "I, I think I saw him in the Magic Shop today. I mean, I met a Dean in the shop today. His aura wasn't right, either."
Buffy looked at Willow with an 'I told you so' expression. "See, he only needed something from the magic shop."
"He was buying things to remove a curse and break a bond," Tara clarified.
"A curse?" Xander asked moving closer to Tara. "The curse that makes Buffy look like Faith?"
"No. The curse that was put on Dean and someone he loves to keep them apart."
Anya lit up with excitement. "Yes, finally. What happened? How did you learn about the curse? He obviously hasn't broken it yet."
"You knew about the curse?" Buffy demanded glaring at the former demon.
"I was there when it happened."
"Why didn't you say anything?" Willow asked.
"I couldn't. I was bound by the demon who cast it. I couldn't speak of it until someone else figured it out." Anya was so happy someone had found out about the curse, she couldn't stop smiling. "Marissa really went all out on it, very creative and painful."
"Painful?" Xander, Giles and Willow echoed.
Anya nodded gleefully. "Oh, yeah, Dean's been in pain for months now. You know the saying ripped your heart out? Well this would have been like ripped out, then torn to shreds. Dean should have felt that every time he saw you." Her glee wasn't fazed by the others' shocked looks. "How did he react when he saw you? Did he clutch his head? His heart? Did he puke blood? Maybe it wasn't so bad since you weren't in your body. Still, probably pretty bad."
Overwhelmed, Willow sat on Giles' couch. She wondered if the curse was why Buffy had been so quick to anger the past months.
"Anya, when you know someone's been cursed you speak up. That's not something you keep to yourself," Xander said hoping to prevent the slayer from killing his girlfriend.
"Duh, but I couldn't. I told you, I was bound to keep quiet until someone else learned of it." She nodded at Tara. "Willow's lesbian friend has learned of it and, I can talk about it. Let's see what else was there? Ripping heart out, no other love and oh yeah, all the things you once enjoyed you now find repulsive."
Tara cleared her throat and asked, "Is he good at spells and incantations? The ones he needs to do are very intricate and he needs to be perfect about the timing and methods..."
"Yeah, Dean'll be fine," Buffy quickly interrupted. "We have a more pressing problem right now, namely getting me back in me."
"Buffy!" Willow sniped at her friend, "this is Dean we're talking about."
Buffy rolled her eyes in exasperation, but Giles was deriding himself for not noticing her symptoms sooner. "Buffy was cursed as well?"
Anya nodded. "Well, being the slayer may have made more of the curse bounce onto Dean, but, oh yeah, she's cursed, too."
"Well, that certainly explains your behavior for the past few months," Giles responded.
"What are you talking about?" Buffy demanded.
"You've been stand-off-ish, depressed, cranky and overall not nice," Willow began.
"And not just because you weren't getting any," Anya added.
Buffy glared, insulted by the insinuations. "Fine, whatever, still have to get me back to me."
"Yes, of course," Giles replied condescendingly. He walked over to one of his many bookshelves. "Faith, what did you use in order to complete the switch?"
Faith huffed. "And why would I tell you?"
"Because Faith, we will change you back, that's really not an issue. Your cooperation will make it easier. However, I can actually help you." Giles approached the girl and crouched before her. "You have three options. We turn you over to the police and you go to prison. We turn you over to the Initiative and Adam who will dissect you or worse. Or we turn you over to the Watcher's Council and they take you to England for rehabilitation."
The intensity of his glare made Faith relent. "Fine, it was a gold box, but I broke it."
Giles nodded as he rose. "Thank you. Now Tara, are you familiar with astral projection?"
"Yes."
"Tara's a very powerful witch," Willow said proudly.
Giles continued, "Tara, did Dean happen to say where he was going to perform this ritual?"
"No, but it would have to be where he was cursed."
"The party at Riley's," Xander said excitedly. "Lowell house. It has to be."
Giles flipped open a book and adjusted his glasses. "Good. Willow, Anya, you two go and assist Dean if he needs it." The girls got to their feet. "Xander, help me tie Buffy to that chair. Securely."
Before Willow could leave, Buffy took her hand. "He's not going to want to see me," Buffy said in a voice so small it didn't sound like her. Willow was about to interrupt, but Buffy continued, "It's been months, Willow. He didn't try once. He never called, he changed his number, just let him be. If he wanted me, he would have done something. He would have stayed here with Giles."
"You don't know that. It could have been the curse."
Buffy shook her head disagreeing and walked back to the chair for Xander to restrain her. It had been the first time in months that Buffy showed any emotion other than anger when it came to Dean. It was enough to convince Willow that once the curse was gone, Buffy and Dean would be back together.
Dean was climbing the fire escape behind Lowell House when he heard voices. He froze against the wall and waited for them to pass.
"I don't know how we could have missed her."
"Someone must have helped her escape."
"No," Riley replied, "I think she's still in town. She's probably waiting for the heat to die down or another chance at Buffy."
"Speaking of a chance at Buffy," the man snickered.
"Exactly. Buffy's probably waiting for me upstairs. So guys, under no circumstances are you to disturb us tonight."
"You got it, man. Have fun. I want details in the morning."
Dean sighed. He better work fast to avoid seeing Buffy. Even without the curse, the idea of her and Riley would kill him.
Once on the roof, he worked quickly. He removed all his supplies from his pack, deciding to remove the bonding spell as soon as he finished with the curse. The shaman told him it would be more effective if done on the night of the new moon, but Dean knew the faster the bond was broken the sooner he could leave Sunnydale.
Dean concentrated on completing the first spell before he dealt with whoever was on the fire escape. He heard them step onto the roof just as he blew out the candles and broke the curse. Ready to unload his cover story, he froze when he heard Willow whisper his name.
"Over here, Willow," Dean answered packing up as much as he could so she wouldn't see what he was doing there.
Anya smelled the smoke. "Did it work? Did you break the curse?"
"Yeah," Dean sighed heavily and stopped packing. Of course they would know about the curse. "How'd you know where I was?"
"Willow's girlfriend figured it out. She told us about seeing you at the Magic Shop."
Dean studied Willow for a moment. "Tara? Tara's your girlfriend?" Willow nodded, nervous about what Dean would think, but he continued preparing for the next spell.
"Dean, what are you doing? You broke the curse," Willow whispered.
"I've got one more small ritual, then I'm done."
Anya stepped forward. "You don't have to do that one. You don't have to worry about the bond."
Before he could argue, Willow spoke up. "This building isn't the safest place to be, for any of us."
"Look, I know she has a date here tonight. I heard the guys talking. All the more reason for me to get this over with." He pulled a small bowl from his bag and placed Buffy's ring in it.
"No, she doesn't have a date. She -"
Seeing that Dean was preparing to continue the ritual Anya interrupted. "You can't break the bond tonight. You're soul mates. It has to be on the new moon."
Dean rolled back on his heels and stopped. Looking up at Anya, he said, "There's no such thing as soul mates. Even if there was, it's all the more reason for me to break the bond."
"No, you are soul mates," Willow argued. "Tara saw your auras. You can't just ignore that. Do you know how rare it is to find a soul mate?"
Dean stood and faced Willow. "Your girl's romantic ideas aside, it was part of the curse, Willow. Buffy and I are not soul mates, okay? It's not real. Once I break this bond, she can be with who ever she wants and be happy."
"She was happy."
"No, Willow, she was settling." Dean looked away. "Now, she'll have a chance to be with a guy that does make her happy. Some guy that's going to be a doctor or a lawyer, or at least a guy that will be around for her when she needs him." Before Willow could argue, Dean added, "I saw them, Willow. I saw her and Riley together and she looked pretty damn happy. Now, I have to finish this."
"She's not with Riley," Willow whispered. "She was just using him and we can explain all of that if you just give us a chance."
Anya grabbed Dean's arm. "We've got to get out of here. It's not safe. And if you really want to break that bond, you'll have to do it tomorrow. Trust me, former vengeance demon remember?"
Dean huffed but relented and gathered his things. Silently, they climbed down the fire escape.
Once they were safely away from Lowell house, Willow began to explain to Dean how Buffy was using Riley to find out the initiative's plans and how to destroy Adam. Seeing that she wasn't making much of difference, Willow stopped defending Buffy and demanded Dean defend himself. "You know, Dean, Buffy would have told you all of this herself if you had called just once. You had your part in all of this, too. You ignored her letters and changed your number. Buffy thought you were done, over, and that you never wanted to see her again."
"What?" Dean stared at her in shock. "What are you talking about? I called. I called every frickin' day for a week. Buffy always let it go to the machine until you guys changed your number. She returned every letter I wrote. Buffy did, her handwriting was on the envelopes. She refused the flowers, the Christmas gift, everything. Buffy made it clear she wanted nothing to do with me."
"That was all the curse," Anya interjected. "I told you it was a good one."
Dean looked puzzled. "I thought the curse just broke us up."
"No," Anya laughed. "It broke you up, kept you apart, prevented you from reconciling, and caused you great physical pain when you saw her."
"Dean."
Dean turned and for the first time in months, he felt like he could breathe. "Buffy."
Buffy wrapped her arms around him and pressed her head against his chest. The sound of his heart beating soothed an ache she had carried for months. They stood in their embrace forgetting the rest of the world.
Tara arrived a moment later, having not been able to keep up with Buffy as she ran. Taking Willow's hand she whispered, "They're going to be okay, now."
Buffy couldn't remember the walk back to her dorm. She can't remember ever letting go of Dean. Buffy knew that she was so in love with Dean that she could barely take it, unable to breathe or think about anything that wasn't Dean. Every part of Buffy's body seemed to hurt when Dean wasn't soothing that ache away. They kissed until they couldn't think, until they were a contented mess of tangled limbs, and neither of them had the strength or the will to separate.
By dawn they were exhausted, but afraid to sleep. Afraid they would wake up to find the night had been a dream. But the sound of Dean's heartbeat and the warmth of his body next to hers soon lulled Buffy to sleep.
They spent most of the following day wrapped around each other in Buffy's bed, only leaving when it was determined that food was also a necessity. That decision got them as far as Dean's motel room. After another round of lovemaking and showers, they finally met up with the rest of the Scooby gang. Buffy's friends noticed the immediate improvement in Buffy's demeanor.
Unfortunately, Dean's conscience pricked him all evening. He grew more agitated as the night went on and was unable to hide it from Buffy. "What's wrong? Something's bothering you."
Dean tried to reassure her. "I've got to go take care of something, but I'll be quick and be right back. I just don't want to leave you."
"I'll go with you."
"No. Stay here with your friends," he insisted. "I'll be back. I promise." Buffy wasn't convinced, but nodded and let him go.
As he walked out, Dean ran into Tara. "Dean, are you guys leaving already?"
"No, just me. Buffy's inside." He lowered his voice. "I've still got the second ritual to do. The one that breaks the bond. It's the new moon, if I don't do it tonight," he trailed off.
Tara nodded solemnly, but took a second to study him. "Why? Why do you want to break the bond? You two look so happy together."
Dean looked towards Buffy. "I am happy, but a shaman told me my soul was broken or something and I have to get it back or I can't help my dad."
"Your soul is fine. You're not in a bunch of jagged pieces anymore."
"I thought Buffy held a piece or something and I had to break this bond to get it back."
"No. Your aura glows brighter when you're together, so does hers, but your soul is your own, it's intact."
Dean grinned, grabbed Tara in a hug and spun her around. With his arm still around Tara, he rejoined the group. "That was fast," Buffy said smiling at the huge grin Dean wore.
"I was making sure Tara knew where we were."
Buffy shook her head at his obvious lie, but ignored it. Then Dean grabbed her hand and pulled her to her feet. "Come on, you owe me like five million dances."
As he drew her into his arms, Buffy was sure nothing could wipe the smile off her face. "You sure seem happier than you did a minute ago."
"Why wouldn't I be happy? I have my girl in my arms and I just had what was probably the best day of my life." He stopped their dance, took her hands from around his neck and held them in one of his. "I also have this, if you still want it." He dug in his pocket and pulled out the silver ring he gave her years before.
Buffy gasped and slid it onto her finger. "I never thought I'd see this again. I thought Faith had lost it or taken it." She looked up at him. "Thank you."
"You know you're it for me, right?" Dean said suddenly. When Buffy didn't respond, he said, "I mean, you know that, don't you? That I love you. "
It took Buffy a moment to find her voice. "You, too. I love you, too, more than anything."
The next morning, Buffy took the bag Faith had packed from the trunk of the Impala. She was going through it when Dean finished his shower. "We're going to have to stop by my mom's before we leave."
Dean wrinkled his brow in confusion.
"Faith didn't pack any warm clothes." She looked at Dean who still looked lost. "You said your dad and Sam are in Wisconsin, right?" Dean nodded mutely. "Then, I definitely have got to get some warmer stuff."
"You're coming with me?" Dean stared open mouthed. "To Wisconsin? In winter?"
Buffy gave him her best pleading pout. "I promise to pack light and let you pick the music."
Dean wasn't ready to believe this change in plans quite yet. "What about school and the Frankenstein Terminator thing that's running around?"
Buffy waved off his concerns. "Jonathon is back from his book tour. While you were in the shower, I called him and he assured me he's got this handled."
"Really?"
"Well, if you don't want me to go with you..."
Dean grabbed her bag and the Impala's keys. "We're wasting daylight, baby. Let's go get your parka."
Marriott Residence Inn Sioux Falls 2004
From the Marriott parking lot, Buffy hoped her best friend would come through for her yet again. "Willow, what do you know about reapers? Is there a way to stop one if it is after you?"
"I know Dawn is researching the same thing," Willow replied. "She told me Dean had seen one."
"Yeah."
"I'll tell you the same thing I told her. Just because he saw one doesn't mean it's after him. He could be trapped in the nether realm. There he may be able to see all kinds of spirits and entities we can't."
Buffy nodded. "So, you're saying there's nothing we can do."
Willow wasn't used to Buffy sounding so defeated. "No. that's not what I'm saying. We can send an emissary into the nether realm to talk to Dean and guide him back."
"How?" Buffy demanded.
"I'm sending everything you need to know in an email to Dawn," Willow answered. She heard Buffy's relieved sigh. "And I am flying out tomorrow."
"You are?"
"Yeah. So's Xander. We can't let you go through this without your best friends as back up." Buffy's sharp breath was the only response Willow needed. "And wait until I tell you what Dawn has done."
"Thanks, Giles, that's the best news I've heard all day." Dawn hung up nearly bursting with excitement, but she deflated when she saw Sam across the room looking miserable. She walked over, handed him a bottle of water and placed a hand on his shoulder. "Sam, I've got some news I think you'll like."
He put his hand over hers as he looked up from the laptop. "Giles knew how to stop a reaper?"
"Sort of, but no, not exactly." Discouraged, Sam looked back at the laptop. "The watcher's council is covering the hospital bills for you and your family."
Sam looked back amazed. "What? Why?"
"I convinced them they owe you guys, especially Dean." She smiled at Sam's relieved expression. "And Giles has arranged for a specialist from John Hopkins to fly in and take Dean's case."
Overwhelmed, Sam fell back in his chair. "You did that, for us?"
"You guys are family, Sam."
Sam shook his head. Dawn reminded him so much of Dean at times. "I was just thinking of the time Buffy joined us out here by Bobby's. Her and Dean had just gotten back together and they were -"
"Disgusting? Annoyingly all over each other?"
Sam chuckled remembering how he and Dawn used to gag over their siblings' relationship. "Yeah, exactly. Just the way they would look at each other would make me puke." Dawn smiled at him knowing she had lifted his spirits for a moment. But Sam went on with a shake of his head. "Actually, I remembered being jealous of them." He looked wistfully at her. "Do you think I was selfish to tell Dean to stay away from Buffy? Maybe I'm jealous he gets to be with Buffy again and I don't have Jess."
"No, Sam. I think you love your brother and want what's best for him." Dawn wished she could tell Sam the truth about Buffy, but since she didn't know the spell had been lifted, she remained quiet.
Buffy took a few moments alone in the parking lot to compose herself. Earlier she had wanted to slap Dawn across town and back. After Willow told her how Dawn arranged for the Winchesters' bills to be paid and for a specialist for Dean, Buffy wanted to get her sister the pony she had always wanted as a kid.
She looked at the door and took a few deep breaths. Sam was in there with Dawn and probably had a million questions and a ton of anger. It was time to face the music. Buffy braced herself for Sam's attack.
But it wasn't enough.
Acting on the instinct drilled into him by his father, Sam Winchester fired his gun the moment he saw the 'undead' Buffy Summers.
Chapter 6
note: I hope you don't mind that I stopped putting the flashbacks in italics. I figured you're smart enough to see the bold print announcing the change in time and place.
Author: Noturbaby
Fandoms: Supernatural, Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Rating: PG-13 - R
Warnings: None (eventual het sex)
Pairings: Dean /Buffy, Sam/Dawn, Willow/Oz, Willow/Tara, Xander/Anya Most BtVS characters make an appearance.
Previously (links to earlier chapters)
Shiloh County Hospital 2004
Buffy gathered her nerves and walked into John Winchester's room. "We need to talk."
John bolted up in his bed. "Buffy? How the hell did you-?"
"Does it matter?" Buffy swallowed. "Dawn's number was in Dean's wallet, I guess." She crossed the room. "Dean's in trouble."
"I know. Sam told me about Dean crashing, but they revived him. He'll pull through, Dean's a fighter" John hoped to convince himself as much as her.
Buffy smiled tightly and nodded. "Yeah, I keep telling myself that, too. But Sam and Dawn spoke with him using a Ouija board. Dean's been seeing a reaper."
John took a moment to absorb that information. "A reaper," he repeated quietly.
"Do you know a way to stop one? To fight it?"
John lowered his head. "Don't think there is a way to stop one once it's your time."
"There has to be." They fell silent, consumed by their own fears.
Dean joined them, then. "Well, isn't this cozy?" He glared at Buffy then his father. "You knew she was alive and didn't tell me? Didn't you think I had the right to know?"
"Dean was always a good kid." John's voice was thick and he cleared his throat before he continued. "He took care of me and Sam. He held our family together." Buffy was surprised by John's show of emotion, but kept quiet. "Dean always did what I told him to, no questions asked. He always gave more than anyone and never complained." John looked up at her, regret shining in his eyes. "I, I shouldn't have made you stay away."
"You didn't make me do anything," Buffy replied quietly reassuring him. "I was in a bad place when Willow brought me back. I would have ruined what we had just to do it, just to hurt Dean because I was in so much pain."
Dean fumed as he listened to them. His anger grew so strong it was expanding from his spirit.
"If I was able to go back and..." Buffy couldn't finish. She was interrupted by a glass shattering against the wall. "Dean?" She gasped his name knowing he was the cause, knowing he was there, listening to them.
John stared at the pieces of broken glass and whispered, "I'm sorry."
"Not good enough," Dean said trying to control his anger. Bitter tears pricked his eyes as he turned to Buffy. "I would have done anything to have you back, to be with you." The light flickered overhead, and Dean left unable to look at either of them for a moment longer.
Buffy looked over at John. "He's so angry."
Sunnydale 2000
Faith groaned as she opened an eye to see where she was. She saw her body and Giles and knew Dean must have figured her out.
Buffy noticed the slight movements of their captive. "Don't get any ideas about going another round. Trust me, you won't like the outcome."
"Giles! I don't know what psycho-slayer has told you but-"
"Oh, shut up, Faith. We know it's you," the watcher replied sounding tired. "Now, you must listen. I will be able to change you two back, but it'd be easier if you told me what you used to cause the transformation."
"And why would I do that?"
"Because you're in serious danger. We both are," Buffy answered ignoring Faith's disbelieving smirk. "There's this group, the Initiative, I heard them say they want to give one of us to this creature they created. I don't even want to think what he would do with us. The other one they want to pass around like a party favor. Trust me neither one is a good option."
"I can handle myself, but it sounds like you got yourself in over your head again." Faith pulled at her restraints. "Don't see how this is my problem. I was on my way out of town."
Buffy bent down in front of the slayer wearing her body. "Look, I get that. I want you gone just as much. But, first, I want my body back and second you don't know who to trust." She stepped away and said, "Don't bother pulling on those restraints, only makes 'em tighter."
"What would you know of trust? What'd you do to make lover boy so angry? He catch you playing house with that Riley dork?"
"Never mind about Dean, it's none of your business." Buffy bit her lip well aware that Faith had been trying to anger her.
Giles opened the door to Xander and Anya. "Whoa, Giles, what's going on?" Xander subtly moved behind Anya. "Why is Buffy tied up and Faith free?"
The slayer that looked like Faith answered. "Faith somehow switched our bodies. I'm Buffy."
Still slightly hiding behind Anya, Xander asked, "How can we be sure?"
Buffy just rolled her eyes and sighed. "Xander, we need you to be here so you can help restrain Faith when we find the spell to switch us back."
Xander and Anya exchanged looks, but before either could ask another question, Willow and Tara arrived. The moment Tara looked at the real Buffy her eyes widened. "You're Buffy, aren't you?"
The relief on Faith's face made Willow smile. "Tara, this is Buffy, Buffy this is my," Willow paused as she realized the significance of what she was about to say. "My girlfriend, Tara. She knew that wasn't you right away," she added pointing to the Buffy that was tied to the chair.
"How?" Buffy asked curious and grateful at the same time.
"Your aura, right now it's all splintered and it's kind of like it's smashed into too small of a vessel."
"You can read auras? That's fascinating. I've always been interested in auras. Perhaps -"
"Giles! You and Tara can talk auras after we get me back to normal. Willow, do you know any spell that can reverse this?" Buffy asked.
"Um, well no, I don't. Giles, what have you found out so far?" Willow asked looking at the book Giles was studying.
"Actually, I haven't had much of a chance to look at anything since Faith woke up. Faith hasn't said what she used and Dean didn't say anything, did he?"
Buffy's "No." was drowned out by Willow's and Xander's "Dean?"
Buffy groaned, "Yeah, it seems Faith thought she could fool Dean and failed. He brought her here, then took off like he always does."
"Dean was here?" Willow asked. "That's got to mean something Buffy."
"It means nothing, Willow. If it did, he wouldn't have left."
"Who's Dean?" Tara whispered to Anya.
"Buffy's hot ex," she answered, decidedly not whispering back.
Tara thought for a moment. Buffy had a splintered aura and the Dean she met in the Magic Shop had a splintered aura, it couldn't be a coincidence. She took a tentative step forward. "Um, this Dean, is he tall, good looking, with freckles and green eyes?"
Every eye in the room looked at her. Faith smirked. "Hey, Red, looks like your girl swings both ways."
Tara blushed brightly, but she shook her head. "I, I think I saw him in the Magic Shop today. I mean, I met a Dean in the shop today. His aura wasn't right, either."
Buffy looked at Willow with an 'I told you so' expression. "See, he only needed something from the magic shop."
"He was buying things to remove a curse and break a bond," Tara clarified.
"A curse?" Xander asked moving closer to Tara. "The curse that makes Buffy look like Faith?"
"No. The curse that was put on Dean and someone he loves to keep them apart."
Anya lit up with excitement. "Yes, finally. What happened? How did you learn about the curse? He obviously hasn't broken it yet."
"You knew about the curse?" Buffy demanded glaring at the former demon.
"I was there when it happened."
"Why didn't you say anything?" Willow asked.
"I couldn't. I was bound by the demon who cast it. I couldn't speak of it until someone else figured it out." Anya was so happy someone had found out about the curse, she couldn't stop smiling. "Marissa really went all out on it, very creative and painful."
"Painful?" Xander, Giles and Willow echoed.
Anya nodded gleefully. "Oh, yeah, Dean's been in pain for months now. You know the saying ripped your heart out? Well this would have been like ripped out, then torn to shreds. Dean should have felt that every time he saw you." Her glee wasn't fazed by the others' shocked looks. "How did he react when he saw you? Did he clutch his head? His heart? Did he puke blood? Maybe it wasn't so bad since you weren't in your body. Still, probably pretty bad."
Overwhelmed, Willow sat on Giles' couch. She wondered if the curse was why Buffy had been so quick to anger the past months.
"Anya, when you know someone's been cursed you speak up. That's not something you keep to yourself," Xander said hoping to prevent the slayer from killing his girlfriend.
"Duh, but I couldn't. I told you, I was bound to keep quiet until someone else learned of it." She nodded at Tara. "Willow's lesbian friend has learned of it and, I can talk about it. Let's see what else was there? Ripping heart out, no other love and oh yeah, all the things you once enjoyed you now find repulsive."
Tara cleared her throat and asked, "Is he good at spells and incantations? The ones he needs to do are very intricate and he needs to be perfect about the timing and methods..."
"Yeah, Dean'll be fine," Buffy quickly interrupted. "We have a more pressing problem right now, namely getting me back in me."
"Buffy!" Willow sniped at her friend, "this is Dean we're talking about."
Buffy rolled her eyes in exasperation, but Giles was deriding himself for not noticing her symptoms sooner. "Buffy was cursed as well?"
Anya nodded. "Well, being the slayer may have made more of the curse bounce onto Dean, but, oh yeah, she's cursed, too."
"Well, that certainly explains your behavior for the past few months," Giles responded.
"What are you talking about?" Buffy demanded.
"You've been stand-off-ish, depressed, cranky and overall not nice," Willow began.
"And not just because you weren't getting any," Anya added.
Buffy glared, insulted by the insinuations. "Fine, whatever, still have to get me back to me."
"Yes, of course," Giles replied condescendingly. He walked over to one of his many bookshelves. "Faith, what did you use in order to complete the switch?"
Faith huffed. "And why would I tell you?"
"Because Faith, we will change you back, that's really not an issue. Your cooperation will make it easier. However, I can actually help you." Giles approached the girl and crouched before her. "You have three options. We turn you over to the police and you go to prison. We turn you over to the Initiative and Adam who will dissect you or worse. Or we turn you over to the Watcher's Council and they take you to England for rehabilitation."
The intensity of his glare made Faith relent. "Fine, it was a gold box, but I broke it."
Giles nodded as he rose. "Thank you. Now Tara, are you familiar with astral projection?"
"Yes."
"Tara's a very powerful witch," Willow said proudly.
Giles continued, "Tara, did Dean happen to say where he was going to perform this ritual?"
"No, but it would have to be where he was cursed."
"The party at Riley's," Xander said excitedly. "Lowell house. It has to be."
Giles flipped open a book and adjusted his glasses. "Good. Willow, Anya, you two go and assist Dean if he needs it." The girls got to their feet. "Xander, help me tie Buffy to that chair. Securely."
Before Willow could leave, Buffy took her hand. "He's not going to want to see me," Buffy said in a voice so small it didn't sound like her. Willow was about to interrupt, but Buffy continued, "It's been months, Willow. He didn't try once. He never called, he changed his number, just let him be. If he wanted me, he would have done something. He would have stayed here with Giles."
"You don't know that. It could have been the curse."
Buffy shook her head disagreeing and walked back to the chair for Xander to restrain her. It had been the first time in months that Buffy showed any emotion other than anger when it came to Dean. It was enough to convince Willow that once the curse was gone, Buffy and Dean would be back together.
Dean was climbing the fire escape behind Lowell House when he heard voices. He froze against the wall and waited for them to pass.
"I don't know how we could have missed her."
"Someone must have helped her escape."
"No," Riley replied, "I think she's still in town. She's probably waiting for the heat to die down or another chance at Buffy."
"Speaking of a chance at Buffy," the man snickered.
"Exactly. Buffy's probably waiting for me upstairs. So guys, under no circumstances are you to disturb us tonight."
"You got it, man. Have fun. I want details in the morning."
Dean sighed. He better work fast to avoid seeing Buffy. Even without the curse, the idea of her and Riley would kill him.
Once on the roof, he worked quickly. He removed all his supplies from his pack, deciding to remove the bonding spell as soon as he finished with the curse. The shaman told him it would be more effective if done on the night of the new moon, but Dean knew the faster the bond was broken the sooner he could leave Sunnydale.
Dean concentrated on completing the first spell before he dealt with whoever was on the fire escape. He heard them step onto the roof just as he blew out the candles and broke the curse. Ready to unload his cover story, he froze when he heard Willow whisper his name.
"Over here, Willow," Dean answered packing up as much as he could so she wouldn't see what he was doing there.
Anya smelled the smoke. "Did it work? Did you break the curse?"
"Yeah," Dean sighed heavily and stopped packing. Of course they would know about the curse. "How'd you know where I was?"
"Willow's girlfriend figured it out. She told us about seeing you at the Magic Shop."
Dean studied Willow for a moment. "Tara? Tara's your girlfriend?" Willow nodded, nervous about what Dean would think, but he continued preparing for the next spell.
"Dean, what are you doing? You broke the curse," Willow whispered.
"I've got one more small ritual, then I'm done."
Anya stepped forward. "You don't have to do that one. You don't have to worry about the bond."
Before he could argue, Willow spoke up. "This building isn't the safest place to be, for any of us."
"Look, I know she has a date here tonight. I heard the guys talking. All the more reason for me to get this over with." He pulled a small bowl from his bag and placed Buffy's ring in it.
"No, she doesn't have a date. She -"
Seeing that Dean was preparing to continue the ritual Anya interrupted. "You can't break the bond tonight. You're soul mates. It has to be on the new moon."
Dean rolled back on his heels and stopped. Looking up at Anya, he said, "There's no such thing as soul mates. Even if there was, it's all the more reason for me to break the bond."
"No, you are soul mates," Willow argued. "Tara saw your auras. You can't just ignore that. Do you know how rare it is to find a soul mate?"
Dean stood and faced Willow. "Your girl's romantic ideas aside, it was part of the curse, Willow. Buffy and I are not soul mates, okay? It's not real. Once I break this bond, she can be with who ever she wants and be happy."
"She was happy."
"No, Willow, she was settling." Dean looked away. "Now, she'll have a chance to be with a guy that does make her happy. Some guy that's going to be a doctor or a lawyer, or at least a guy that will be around for her when she needs him." Before Willow could argue, Dean added, "I saw them, Willow. I saw her and Riley together and she looked pretty damn happy. Now, I have to finish this."
"She's not with Riley," Willow whispered. "She was just using him and we can explain all of that if you just give us a chance."
Anya grabbed Dean's arm. "We've got to get out of here. It's not safe. And if you really want to break that bond, you'll have to do it tomorrow. Trust me, former vengeance demon remember?"
Dean huffed but relented and gathered his things. Silently, they climbed down the fire escape.
Once they were safely away from Lowell house, Willow began to explain to Dean how Buffy was using Riley to find out the initiative's plans and how to destroy Adam. Seeing that she wasn't making much of difference, Willow stopped defending Buffy and demanded Dean defend himself. "You know, Dean, Buffy would have told you all of this herself if you had called just once. You had your part in all of this, too. You ignored her letters and changed your number. Buffy thought you were done, over, and that you never wanted to see her again."
"What?" Dean stared at her in shock. "What are you talking about? I called. I called every frickin' day for a week. Buffy always let it go to the machine until you guys changed your number. She returned every letter I wrote. Buffy did, her handwriting was on the envelopes. She refused the flowers, the Christmas gift, everything. Buffy made it clear she wanted nothing to do with me."
"That was all the curse," Anya interjected. "I told you it was a good one."
Dean looked puzzled. "I thought the curse just broke us up."
"No," Anya laughed. "It broke you up, kept you apart, prevented you from reconciling, and caused you great physical pain when you saw her."
"Dean."
Dean turned and for the first time in months, he felt like he could breathe. "Buffy."
Buffy wrapped her arms around him and pressed her head against his chest. The sound of his heart beating soothed an ache she had carried for months. They stood in their embrace forgetting the rest of the world.
Tara arrived a moment later, having not been able to keep up with Buffy as she ran. Taking Willow's hand she whispered, "They're going to be okay, now."
Buffy couldn't remember the walk back to her dorm. She can't remember ever letting go of Dean. Buffy knew that she was so in love with Dean that she could barely take it, unable to breathe or think about anything that wasn't Dean. Every part of Buffy's body seemed to hurt when Dean wasn't soothing that ache away. They kissed until they couldn't think, until they were a contented mess of tangled limbs, and neither of them had the strength or the will to separate.
By dawn they were exhausted, but afraid to sleep. Afraid they would wake up to find the night had been a dream. But the sound of Dean's heartbeat and the warmth of his body next to hers soon lulled Buffy to sleep.
They spent most of the following day wrapped around each other in Buffy's bed, only leaving when it was determined that food was also a necessity. That decision got them as far as Dean's motel room. After another round of lovemaking and showers, they finally met up with the rest of the Scooby gang. Buffy's friends noticed the immediate improvement in Buffy's demeanor.
Unfortunately, Dean's conscience pricked him all evening. He grew more agitated as the night went on and was unable to hide it from Buffy. "What's wrong? Something's bothering you."
Dean tried to reassure her. "I've got to go take care of something, but I'll be quick and be right back. I just don't want to leave you."
"I'll go with you."
"No. Stay here with your friends," he insisted. "I'll be back. I promise." Buffy wasn't convinced, but nodded and let him go.
As he walked out, Dean ran into Tara. "Dean, are you guys leaving already?"
"No, just me. Buffy's inside." He lowered his voice. "I've still got the second ritual to do. The one that breaks the bond. It's the new moon, if I don't do it tonight," he trailed off.
Tara nodded solemnly, but took a second to study him. "Why? Why do you want to break the bond? You two look so happy together."
Dean looked towards Buffy. "I am happy, but a shaman told me my soul was broken or something and I have to get it back or I can't help my dad."
"Your soul is fine. You're not in a bunch of jagged pieces anymore."
"I thought Buffy held a piece or something and I had to break this bond to get it back."
"No. Your aura glows brighter when you're together, so does hers, but your soul is your own, it's intact."
Dean grinned, grabbed Tara in a hug and spun her around. With his arm still around Tara, he rejoined the group. "That was fast," Buffy said smiling at the huge grin Dean wore.
"I was making sure Tara knew where we were."
Buffy shook her head at his obvious lie, but ignored it. Then Dean grabbed her hand and pulled her to her feet. "Come on, you owe me like five million dances."
As he drew her into his arms, Buffy was sure nothing could wipe the smile off her face. "You sure seem happier than you did a minute ago."
"Why wouldn't I be happy? I have my girl in my arms and I just had what was probably the best day of my life." He stopped their dance, took her hands from around his neck and held them in one of his. "I also have this, if you still want it." He dug in his pocket and pulled out the silver ring he gave her years before.
Buffy gasped and slid it onto her finger. "I never thought I'd see this again. I thought Faith had lost it or taken it." She looked up at him. "Thank you."
"You know you're it for me, right?" Dean said suddenly. When Buffy didn't respond, he said, "I mean, you know that, don't you? That I love you. "
It took Buffy a moment to find her voice. "You, too. I love you, too, more than anything."
The next morning, Buffy took the bag Faith had packed from the trunk of the Impala. She was going through it when Dean finished his shower. "We're going to have to stop by my mom's before we leave."
Dean wrinkled his brow in confusion.
"Faith didn't pack any warm clothes." She looked at Dean who still looked lost. "You said your dad and Sam are in Wisconsin, right?" Dean nodded mutely. "Then, I definitely have got to get some warmer stuff."
"You're coming with me?" Dean stared open mouthed. "To Wisconsin? In winter?"
Buffy gave him her best pleading pout. "I promise to pack light and let you pick the music."
Dean wasn't ready to believe this change in plans quite yet. "What about school and the Frankenstein Terminator thing that's running around?"
Buffy waved off his concerns. "Jonathon is back from his book tour. While you were in the shower, I called him and he assured me he's got this handled."
"Really?"
"Well, if you don't want me to go with you..."
Dean grabbed her bag and the Impala's keys. "We're wasting daylight, baby. Let's go get your parka."
Marriott Residence Inn Sioux Falls 2004
From the Marriott parking lot, Buffy hoped her best friend would come through for her yet again. "Willow, what do you know about reapers? Is there a way to stop one if it is after you?"
"I know Dawn is researching the same thing," Willow replied. "She told me Dean had seen one."
"Yeah."
"I'll tell you the same thing I told her. Just because he saw one doesn't mean it's after him. He could be trapped in the nether realm. There he may be able to see all kinds of spirits and entities we can't."
Buffy nodded. "So, you're saying there's nothing we can do."
Willow wasn't used to Buffy sounding so defeated. "No. that's not what I'm saying. We can send an emissary into the nether realm to talk to Dean and guide him back."
"How?" Buffy demanded.
"I'm sending everything you need to know in an email to Dawn," Willow answered. She heard Buffy's relieved sigh. "And I am flying out tomorrow."
"You are?"
"Yeah. So's Xander. We can't let you go through this without your best friends as back up." Buffy's sharp breath was the only response Willow needed. "And wait until I tell you what Dawn has done."
"Thanks, Giles, that's the best news I've heard all day." Dawn hung up nearly bursting with excitement, but she deflated when she saw Sam across the room looking miserable. She walked over, handed him a bottle of water and placed a hand on his shoulder. "Sam, I've got some news I think you'll like."
He put his hand over hers as he looked up from the laptop. "Giles knew how to stop a reaper?"
"Sort of, but no, not exactly." Discouraged, Sam looked back at the laptop. "The watcher's council is covering the hospital bills for you and your family."
Sam looked back amazed. "What? Why?"
"I convinced them they owe you guys, especially Dean." She smiled at Sam's relieved expression. "And Giles has arranged for a specialist from John Hopkins to fly in and take Dean's case."
Overwhelmed, Sam fell back in his chair. "You did that, for us?"
"You guys are family, Sam."
Sam shook his head. Dawn reminded him so much of Dean at times. "I was just thinking of the time Buffy joined us out here by Bobby's. Her and Dean had just gotten back together and they were -"
"Disgusting? Annoyingly all over each other?"
Sam chuckled remembering how he and Dawn used to gag over their siblings' relationship. "Yeah, exactly. Just the way they would look at each other would make me puke." Dawn smiled at him knowing she had lifted his spirits for a moment. But Sam went on with a shake of his head. "Actually, I remembered being jealous of them." He looked wistfully at her. "Do you think I was selfish to tell Dean to stay away from Buffy? Maybe I'm jealous he gets to be with Buffy again and I don't have Jess."
"No, Sam. I think you love your brother and want what's best for him." Dawn wished she could tell Sam the truth about Buffy, but since she didn't know the spell had been lifted, she remained quiet.
Buffy took a few moments alone in the parking lot to compose herself. Earlier she had wanted to slap Dawn across town and back. After Willow told her how Dawn arranged for the Winchesters' bills to be paid and for a specialist for Dean, Buffy wanted to get her sister the pony she had always wanted as a kid.
She looked at the door and took a few deep breaths. Sam was in there with Dawn and probably had a million questions and a ton of anger. It was time to face the music. Buffy braced herself for Sam's attack.
But it wasn't enough.
Acting on the instinct drilled into him by his father, Sam Winchester fired his gun the moment he saw the 'undead' Buffy Summers.
Chapter 6
note: I hope you don't mind that I stopped putting the flashbacks in italics. I figured you're smart enough to see the bold print announcing the change in time and place.