Kara/ Laura --Angsty as Hell
okay i swear this'll be the last one. i found this in my old computer and figured i'd post it before i lose it again
It's Kara/ Laura, right after Exodus Pt. II, maybe three days later. But the relationship is sort of implied.
Very depressing but I like it anyway
Kara swiped the bottle when Chief had his back turned. She winked at Racetrack, who witnessed the whole scene with the vaguely nauseated expression that Kara's presence seemed to evoke these days. She barely made it to the hallway before her laughter split the corridor, loud and false and grating even to her own ears. She heard the slip of unsteadiness in her voice. The slight crack and catch that hinted toward the truly unhinged.
The unexpected force of her own anger consumed and humbled her. She felt dangerously unhappy. Kara knew if she'd had to stay in that rec room one second longer she would've strangled someone.
If she'd stayed longer, watched people taking up the mantles of their old lives and gamely soldiering on because they were a family, godsdammit, she might've drained her glass and slammed it against someone's head. And even Kara knew this was bad. Even Kara knew that her job was to self-destruct and try not to bring others with her. That was something she’d known all her life. Something she’d been surprised to hear out loud on her first day of Viper school. That was the job description. Her job just seemed to have become her whole life.
But everywhere she looked people were hopping back into their skins and walking around again. Getting really comfortable and digging in for the renewed struggle for humanity and it’s perpetuation. They were donning uniforms they would have hung over windows to block out the sun back on New Caprica. Kara couldn't even look at hers.
Wouldn't think about what she had betrayed. Couldn’t think about what it would mean to put it back on her body.
Tigh had gotten wise quicker. He'd left after about an hour; hadn't even pretended to care about his cards and she'd lost her own will to appease soon after that.
She thought briefly of Sam and she tilted the bottle in his honor. Liquid slid straight down her throat and right past the heart that was imploding from the inside because it couldn't detach itself from her stupid, frakking, traitorous brain.
If she could just stop thinking. But that was like stopping breathing. Essentially it meant the same thing. There were only so many ways it could come about. And you didn't wake up from any of them.
The heart in question bumped rhythmically against the cage of her ribs.
The familiar, unpleasant flutter from the liquor made her feel cagey and mean.
She hadn't realized how far she'd walked. Hadn't realized a single person could drain a bottle so quickly. She came to a slow halt in the corridor and allowed herself a moment of amazement that she'd come so far and seen no one. This had been Galactica just a few days ago. Rattling along oblivious to its decay and its emptiness while she was with him. And wasn't he really the crux of it all?
He wasn't.
And Kara shuddered then and wished for another bottle because her hands were empty and her bones suddenly felt heavier because they were full of the knowledge that Leoben hadn't even been half of the reason she was what she'd was.
She thought of her fingers and the way she could sometimes imagine the old breaks as they circled the bones. She thought of the way she could feel the long-healed wounds ache when she was cold. And New Caprica had been viciously, bitingly, bruisingly cold.
She wondered if Lee ever felt in his heart that thrashing she'd given him. She wondered if it hammered inside of him and threatened to bleed because she'd cut it herself like some slashing, inarticulate animal.
She didn't notice the president until she was right in front of her. She had her hands up, palms facing Kara and though she must have been startled to come upon someone her fingers were fluid and relaxed. Kara Thrace was no threat to her.
"Captain."
Kara shook her head.
"Kara. Nothing has changed."
Laura appeared somewhat dismayed. Bill had mentioned some concerns over Kara and she had somewhat naively hoped to find them untrue, or at the very least exaggerated.
Laura offered a small smile. Glanced at the bottle Kara held tightly in her fist. Did not fail to mark the absence of its contents.
Grinning, Kara said softly, "I'd offer you a drink but I'm all out."
Laura took the bottle, placed it in a trash can just inside the entrance to the mess hall.
Laura considered Kara for a moment. She decided to be blunt.
"You look like hell, Kara."
Kara snorted in amusement. She knew that Laura's assessment had been overly kind. Irreverently, and for a reason she couldn't quite pin down, Kara let her gaze travel over Laura appreciatively.
"Can't say the same for you, Laura."
Laura fixed Kara with a gaze that made clear her current desire to dispense with the coy flirtation, cheap overtures or anything else Kara would throw at her.
"You're coming with me."
For a brief second Kara seemed to think Laura was placing her under arrest.
Laura watched Kara. Felt the need to tread carefully. She approached Kara, drunk and in pain, like one approached a stray animal.
Kara felt Laura's hand slide down her arm to circle her wrist. The president looked at Kara reassuringly and led her in the direction of the hangar deck.
Kara was suddenly overcome by curiosity. "Are you the president again?"
Laura watched Kara out of the corner of her eye as they entered the deck. "I'm still, Laura."
Sadly, Kara shook her head. "I'm glad you came out on top, anyway."
The shadow of Colonial One loomed over them. A few guards lolled around the entrance. Security was nowhere near it's pre-colonization levels.
Laura suddenly rounded on Kara, her eyes full of compassion but never pity. Laura knew that Kara Thrace could never accept pity given kindly.
The president's arms went around Kara, pulling her into a tight embrace despite the half dozen bodyguards. She stroked Kara's hair, ignoring the stiffness of her body.
"Kara, I can't fix this. I'm sorry."
The younger woman reluctantly leaned against the president. She could feel the sorrow radiating from Laura. The woman was bereft. Kara felt strangely obligated to give her what she needed. Laura needed to hear that it wouldn't have been any different if Leoben hadn't taken her. Kara needed to hear it too.
Kara whispered in a surprisingly comforting voice into Laura's ear before she pulled away, "It was never your job to fix me."
Laura caught Kara's forearms. The girl was quick but alcohol made her motions less fluid and Laura took full advantage, catching Kara's wrists.
"I was worried about you, Kara. I'm sorry about everything that happened."
Kara's nostrils flared briefly. This was right up there with the arrow, and the farm and the sex with Lee on Caprica. This was something she did. not. want. to. discuss.
Kara finally wrenched free, unable to watch whatever emotion surfaced in Laura's eyes.
"Thanks for the walk, Madame President."
She turned and left the hangar, leaving Laura to board her ship and think of better days when they'd all been ready to convince themselves that New Caprica would work. When they were living and not just surviving.
It's Kara/ Laura, right after Exodus Pt. II, maybe three days later. But the relationship is sort of implied.
Very depressing but I like it anyway
Kara swiped the bottle when Chief had his back turned. She winked at Racetrack, who witnessed the whole scene with the vaguely nauseated expression that Kara's presence seemed to evoke these days. She barely made it to the hallway before her laughter split the corridor, loud and false and grating even to her own ears. She heard the slip of unsteadiness in her voice. The slight crack and catch that hinted toward the truly unhinged.
The unexpected force of her own anger consumed and humbled her. She felt dangerously unhappy. Kara knew if she'd had to stay in that rec room one second longer she would've strangled someone.
If she'd stayed longer, watched people taking up the mantles of their old lives and gamely soldiering on because they were a family, godsdammit, she might've drained her glass and slammed it against someone's head. And even Kara knew this was bad. Even Kara knew that her job was to self-destruct and try not to bring others with her. That was something she’d known all her life. Something she’d been surprised to hear out loud on her first day of Viper school. That was the job description. Her job just seemed to have become her whole life.
But everywhere she looked people were hopping back into their skins and walking around again. Getting really comfortable and digging in for the renewed struggle for humanity and it’s perpetuation. They were donning uniforms they would have hung over windows to block out the sun back on New Caprica. Kara couldn't even look at hers.
Wouldn't think about what she had betrayed. Couldn’t think about what it would mean to put it back on her body.
Tigh had gotten wise quicker. He'd left after about an hour; hadn't even pretended to care about his cards and she'd lost her own will to appease soon after that.
She thought briefly of Sam and she tilted the bottle in his honor. Liquid slid straight down her throat and right past the heart that was imploding from the inside because it couldn't detach itself from her stupid, frakking, traitorous brain.
If she could just stop thinking. But that was like stopping breathing. Essentially it meant the same thing. There were only so many ways it could come about. And you didn't wake up from any of them.
The heart in question bumped rhythmically against the cage of her ribs.
The familiar, unpleasant flutter from the liquor made her feel cagey and mean.
She hadn't realized how far she'd walked. Hadn't realized a single person could drain a bottle so quickly. She came to a slow halt in the corridor and allowed herself a moment of amazement that she'd come so far and seen no one. This had been Galactica just a few days ago. Rattling along oblivious to its decay and its emptiness while she was with him. And wasn't he really the crux of it all?
He wasn't.
And Kara shuddered then and wished for another bottle because her hands were empty and her bones suddenly felt heavier because they were full of the knowledge that Leoben hadn't even been half of the reason she was what she'd was.
She thought of her fingers and the way she could sometimes imagine the old breaks as they circled the bones. She thought of the way she could feel the long-healed wounds ache when she was cold. And New Caprica had been viciously, bitingly, bruisingly cold.
She wondered if Lee ever felt in his heart that thrashing she'd given him. She wondered if it hammered inside of him and threatened to bleed because she'd cut it herself like some slashing, inarticulate animal.
She didn't notice the president until she was right in front of her. She had her hands up, palms facing Kara and though she must have been startled to come upon someone her fingers were fluid and relaxed. Kara Thrace was no threat to her.
"Captain."
Kara shook her head.
"Kara. Nothing has changed."
Laura appeared somewhat dismayed. Bill had mentioned some concerns over Kara and she had somewhat naively hoped to find them untrue, or at the very least exaggerated.
Laura offered a small smile. Glanced at the bottle Kara held tightly in her fist. Did not fail to mark the absence of its contents.
Grinning, Kara said softly, "I'd offer you a drink but I'm all out."
Laura took the bottle, placed it in a trash can just inside the entrance to the mess hall.
Laura considered Kara for a moment. She decided to be blunt.
"You look like hell, Kara."
Kara snorted in amusement. She knew that Laura's assessment had been overly kind. Irreverently, and for a reason she couldn't quite pin down, Kara let her gaze travel over Laura appreciatively.
"Can't say the same for you, Laura."
Laura fixed Kara with a gaze that made clear her current desire to dispense with the coy flirtation, cheap overtures or anything else Kara would throw at her.
"You're coming with me."
For a brief second Kara seemed to think Laura was placing her under arrest.
Laura watched Kara. Felt the need to tread carefully. She approached Kara, drunk and in pain, like one approached a stray animal.
Kara felt Laura's hand slide down her arm to circle her wrist. The president looked at Kara reassuringly and led her in the direction of the hangar deck.
Kara was suddenly overcome by curiosity. "Are you the president again?"
Laura watched Kara out of the corner of her eye as they entered the deck. "I'm still, Laura."
Sadly, Kara shook her head. "I'm glad you came out on top, anyway."
The shadow of Colonial One loomed over them. A few guards lolled around the entrance. Security was nowhere near it's pre-colonization levels.
Laura suddenly rounded on Kara, her eyes full of compassion but never pity. Laura knew that Kara Thrace could never accept pity given kindly.
The president's arms went around Kara, pulling her into a tight embrace despite the half dozen bodyguards. She stroked Kara's hair, ignoring the stiffness of her body.
"Kara, I can't fix this. I'm sorry."
The younger woman reluctantly leaned against the president. She could feel the sorrow radiating from Laura. The woman was bereft. Kara felt strangely obligated to give her what she needed. Laura needed to hear that it wouldn't have been any different if Leoben hadn't taken her. Kara needed to hear it too.
Kara whispered in a surprisingly comforting voice into Laura's ear before she pulled away, "It was never your job to fix me."
Laura caught Kara's forearms. The girl was quick but alcohol made her motions less fluid and Laura took full advantage, catching Kara's wrists.
"I was worried about you, Kara. I'm sorry about everything that happened."
Kara's nostrils flared briefly. This was right up there with the arrow, and the farm and the sex with Lee on Caprica. This was something she did. not. want. to. discuss.
Kara finally wrenched free, unable to watch whatever emotion surfaced in Laura's eyes.
"Thanks for the walk, Madame President."
She turned and left the hangar, leaving Laura to board her ship and think of better days when they'd all been ready to convince themselves that New Caprica would work. When they were living and not just surviving.