i dont even!
there's method to this madness
rpf. mila kunis/andrew garfield (WHOT?). In the end, this is all Emma's fault. (And her horrible taste for alcohol)
dont even look at me like that!
lilly_therose kept incepting me with the idea that andrew and mila would look adorable together. and je_connais would not shut up about a tsn/blackswan crossover.
i'm mostly just re-posting here for je_connais because she can't read the original locked entry.
i apologize already for this, but then this photo came out and the dream was collapsing. and now i can't get the pairing out of my mind.
and um, there's james franco being a troll and some timbalone mocking and hate and a tiny bit of shannon dislike. so you have been warned. HA
Mila meets Emma through Maculay who knows Emma because of her current relationship status with his brother.
Somewhere between drinking wine at Thanksgiving and smoking hash during Christmas Eve with the Culkins, Emma decides to start calling Mila on Saturday afternoons to talk about shitty TV.
Mila supposes that's how it all starts.
It's Emma's 21st birthday.
Mila shows up fashionably late. She makes her way past Franco and Eisenberg, who are deep in conversation about NYU or Yale or who has more cats, and nods hi to Blake and Penn who stop fighting for the briefest of moments so Blake can ask her about the dress she is wearing. Like Blake would even care about the dress Mila is wearing, "black isn't your color" she says before taking a sip from the champagne flute a waiter hands her. What Mila means to say is Miu Miu doesn't make dresses with thigh high slits.
"Terribly late, I know."
Emma doesn't seem to care, she squeezes her hand and jiggles a pink feather boa in her face. Tequila will do that to you.
"Where's your Culkin?"
Mila takes another sip from the glass. "Home. Don't ask, I don't want to talk about it."
"You're just saying that," Emma hands her a shot of Cuervo, "because you are not drunk enough."
It's over trays of flaming shots and people declining sobriety, that she bumps into him.
"Try this." Is what comes out of his mouth as he is gives her something that smells too much of alcohol and anise. She takes it without thinking and as luck would have it, it is the most disgusting shot of alcohol she's ever had.
Andrew covers his laughter with a fist. "It's horrible, I know."
Mila tries to put up a frown, but his laughter contagious.
"Emma ordered these, but they taste like crap. I've taken it upon myself to make sure everyone has at least one." Next to him, sits a tray with at least seven shots.
He buys her a beer to get the taste out of her mouth and she tells him this isn't the first time little miss Stone has ordered alcoholic drinks based on the name rather than content.
Cera walks by and they con him into taking a shot.
Andrew high fives her and it's only after they try to get Emma to stop smoking inside the bar that they talk about work and he tells her about his current Facebook movie.
"So show me the accent then."
"It takes a while to get into, You can't ask me to do it on the spot."
"Don't bullshit me about the craft, I starved myself for 5 months in order to fit into a fucking tutu."
"So," Andrew replies in his best East coast accent, "you're not starving yourself anymore? You should let me buy you something for dinner."
"Not bad. Actually, not bad at all."
"We must get rid of the alcohol first though." He says pointing to the tray. "No reason to waste perfectly horrible alcohol."
So maybe Andrew really wants to get dinner and isn't spitting some line from whatever movie or show, either way she has no time to respond because someone is already sandwiching herself between them and pressing a hand to his neck before whispering something and -- Oh. The girl, whoever she is, quickly disappears into the sea of people, leaving Andrew to blush.
"That was my-- that was Shannon. I hate to leave you in charge but I should go. Early flight and all."
"Don't worry about it. I'm pretty sure I can get Emma to drink these."
"Raincheck."
Andrew leaves and Emma drinks three shots but only if Mila agrees to drink the other three.
She looses an earring and stops to get a burrito before heading home.
"So you and Culkin." Emma asks three days after her party extravaganza over waffles.
Mila shrugs. "No me and Culkin anymore. No me and anyone."
"Same thing you said last month, dude."
"I mean it this time, Emma."
Emma snorts, "Is that why you spent the night playing cute with bambi instead of hanging with the cool kids at my party?"
She almost chokes on her orange juice, "What?"
"Oh don't even, you were flirting with him all night."
"Who?"
"Garfield!"
"I was not."
"Mila, your knickers were around your ankles." Emma says in her best British accent.
She throws a small butter packet and hits Emma on the shoulder.
"He's taken though. My man Eisenberg on the other hand, totally needs to get laid."
She runs into both of them at some premiere-awards-celebrity-excuse-to-dress-up thing.
She's at the bar with Natalie and watches them both come in.
They look happy.
"So he bought you a beer while you were moping around from a breakup, big fucking deal Mila." Natalie, the potty mouth, tells her before chugging the rest of her martini.
"What?"
"Emma has a big mouth."
"And she told you this?"
"No, but she told Franco."
"I know the Winklevoss twins, knew actually."
It's Natalie who introduces herself to Shannon who introduces her to Andrew. All while poor Mila was getting a refill.
"How crazy is that, huh? Small world I guess."
Shannon excuses herself to the bathroom and Natalie finds whatever excuse she can to leave as well.
"I still owe you dinner. You did help me get rid of those-- whatever they were."
Mila smiles. "You paid for my drink. We're even."
"Well, if anytime this week you happen to be around the Hilton; all you can eat buffet, courtesy of Paramount."
"Why don't you just get a place here? It's not like the spandex isn't paying off."
Andrew chuckles. "You googled me?
"Don't flatter yourself, blondie told me."
Andrew laughs this time, and Mila feels hot and cold at the same time. She's probably sweating cold right now. And then out of nowhere-- he grabs her phone to make a call. He checks his own and laughs again before hanging up.
"You have my number and I have yours. " He tells her and then makes his way to Shannon.
Andrew sends a photo of the obnoxious red sunglasses Carey got him as a birthday present.
they're very you. she replies.
ouch
i meant they look good on you.
no no. don't even.
It goes on like this for a while.
fuck it. i dont care what you say, they match the spider suit. emms says hi
The phone buzzes again and displays one blonde Emma Stone flipping off the camera.
"Please explain to me why Garfield was talking about you and Timberlake spending a whole month mock-doing it for the cameras."
"Since when am I on-set gossip material, Stone?"
"Well your buddy Timberlake sent him a photo from set and we could clearly see your bare back. Are you method-acting with him?"
"Shut up, you know I'm no Sienna Miller."
"Whatever, I think he may rub one out tonight to that photo."
"What happened to the girlfriend?"
Mila hears Emma giggle. "I knew it! Is it the hair Mila? The perfectly coiffed hair?"
"Go to hell." She tells Emma before hanging up.
Mila texts him two weeks after the whole Timberlake debacle. how's the spandex treating you?
no rash yet. good thing i moisturize
emms told me they are doing all sorts of cgi to make sure the suit is pg-13. She types it out and clicks SEND without thinking about it.
ten seconds later the screen lights up. oh yeahhh
it lights up again. did this come up while you were swapping co-star stories?
obviously. she had to brag while i told her about justin and the baby sock.
ouch.
And just as she thinks the conversation is dead, the screen lights up yet again. you still in NYC? i have a thing this weekend
yeah.
i'll see you then :)
It's so stupid, how a fucking emoticon can make someone smile so much.
They have plans to get sushi (he owes her dinner after all), but plans get shut down after Jesse calls Andrew and practically begs him to go to some NYU party some girl he is sort of but not really seeing is taking him to. Andrew, being Andrew and never saying no to his dear friend, drags Mila with promises of hard liquor and midnight greasy food. Mila, who has nothing better to do, agrees.
The party is kind of lame in the sense that there is a disco ball hanging from the living room ceiling and christmas lights lining the railing of the stairs. Andrew is out there probably praising Jesse and giving him confidence to make a fucking move on the girl. Mila is left downing grape jell-o shots with some weird girl with blue hair.
"Your mouth-- It's purple." Andrew says between laughs and giggles.
"The blue girl kept giving me--" She doesn't finish the sentence. Maybe it's the alcohol, or maybe she just wants to for no reason at all. Either way, she grabs onto the collar of his shirt and kisses him.
He kisses her back, right there in the kitchen of some lame college party, both acting like a couple of teenagers.
Andrew breaks it up and gives her a guilty smile.
She hails a cab and dials Emma.
"You sleeping?"
"Not really."
"Sorry."
Emma laughs into the phone. "Rough night?"
"I've had better-- I think."
"You ok? Need me to call you a cab or something?"
Mila stares at the street lights. "Remind me not to drink jell-o shots ever again."
"What are you, sixteen? Where are you?"
She closes her eyes for a second. "Don't tell Andrew I called." She hangs up before Emma can say anything.
Filming wraps up and she flies back to LA.
The morning of the Golden Globe nominations Emma takes her out for mimosas at Chateau.
"Golden Globe nominee Emma Stone, it has a nice ring to it."
"You're so full of yourself."
"So Garfield broke things with his California Girl. Anything you have to say about that?"
She tries to evade the question by stuffing pain aux chocolate into her mouth.
"Anything to do with jell-o shots?"
"I'm surprised it's taken you this long to bring it up."
"I figured I could let you at least enjoy the fruit."
Before Mila can say anything, her phone buzzes.
congratulations, nominee
"God Mila, you can at least try and act a bit devastated. They were together for years."
likewise. told you you were good
"I can assure you I had nothing to do with it."
Emma snorts. "I know you Kunis. Either way, a toast." She raises her flute a bit. "To being nominated and snagging all the free shit we can get our hands on because of it. Which may or may not include fluffy-haired British men for you." Mila rolls her eyes and clicks the tip of her glass against Emma's.
The phone buzzes again. you liar. you told me my accent wasnt bad
Awards season begins and Mila tries out seven versions of the same dress before settling on a strapless black Monique Lhuillier.
Ryan Reynolds doesn't call her name and Mila thinks it's the perfect excuse to drink Natalie's champagne glass. Which turns into her drinking Darren's champagne, and asking the waiter to bring some more.
During a commercial break, she catches Emma talking to Andrew and shooting her a look.
"Wasn't that old news?" Natalie asks.
Mila shrugs it off and takes one last sip.
10$ says king colin beats us both for best movie. He texts her halfway through the show.
20 says we beat you
overconfident much?
it's one of my best qualities
The Social Network wins and Andrew almost trips going up. Mila smiles too much.
whats that? you owe me 20 pounds.
She's waiting outside for her limo. we use dollars in america. besides kingspeech didnt win either
buy me dinner and we're even.
technically you still owe me dinner
ha ha ha. hey you looked great tonight!
Mila doesn't reply back.
It's not until the after-party, that they run into each other.
Anne is telling her a fascinating story about Franco and how many levels of high he was last monday to rehearsals and Mila wants to kill herself. But she nods at all the right times and laughs whenever Anne thinks she is being funny. Andrew takes her hand and politely tells Anne Emma is looking for Mila and he is sorry to take her but it is kind of urgent.
"What is it with these Disney-bred stars and their fascination for pot?"
Andrew laughs, hand still holding onto her fingers.
They drink a couple of martinis by the edge of a pool and he twirls her around to the faint sound of some electro-music.
He kisses her this time.
She drops her glass and it splatters all over her dress. It doesn't matter, that's what dry cleaning is for. All Mila wants to do is to run her fingers through that hair and smile when Andrew whispers something into her mouth.
"Wait, wait." Andrew tells her. And if he is about to tell they should stop because he is back with his girlfriend, Mila is pretty sure she will punch him in the groin.
He grabs her hand and next thing she knows, they are kicking someone out of the bathroom.
There's kissing and bitting and, why are there so many buttons to a white shirt?
Outside, the song changes and Mila can faintly hear Justin's voice talking about heartbreak and wooing women. She is definitely going to kill him next time he shows up wearing those ridiculous glasses.
"No no, just stop, not here." Mila tells him.
Andrew, being the perfect gentleman he is, doesn't push it.
"But I'm pretty sure you still owe me dinner."
"And you owe me 20 pounds."
"Get me a burger and then we'll see."
Andrew kisses her once again, "Deal."
END.
rpf. mila kunis/andrew garfield (WHOT?). In the end, this is all Emma's fault. (And her horrible taste for alcohol)
dont even look at me like that!
lilly_therose kept incepting me with the idea that andrew and mila would look adorable together. and je_connais would not shut up about a tsn/blackswan crossover.
i'm mostly just re-posting here for je_connais because she can't read the original locked entry.
i apologize already for this, but then this photo came out and the dream was collapsing. and now i can't get the pairing out of my mind.
and um, there's james franco being a troll and some timbalone mocking and hate and a tiny bit of shannon dislike. so you have been warned. HA
Mila meets Emma through Maculay who knows Emma because of her current relationship status with his brother.
Somewhere between drinking wine at Thanksgiving and smoking hash during Christmas Eve with the Culkins, Emma decides to start calling Mila on Saturday afternoons to talk about shitty TV.
Mila supposes that's how it all starts.
It's Emma's 21st birthday.
Mila shows up fashionably late. She makes her way past Franco and Eisenberg, who are deep in conversation about NYU or Yale or who has more cats, and nods hi to Blake and Penn who stop fighting for the briefest of moments so Blake can ask her about the dress she is wearing. Like Blake would even care about the dress Mila is wearing, "black isn't your color" she says before taking a sip from the champagne flute a waiter hands her. What Mila means to say is Miu Miu doesn't make dresses with thigh high slits.
"Terribly late, I know."
Emma doesn't seem to care, she squeezes her hand and jiggles a pink feather boa in her face. Tequila will do that to you.
"Where's your Culkin?"
Mila takes another sip from the glass. "Home. Don't ask, I don't want to talk about it."
"You're just saying that," Emma hands her a shot of Cuervo, "because you are not drunk enough."
It's over trays of flaming shots and people declining sobriety, that she bumps into him.
"Try this." Is what comes out of his mouth as he is gives her something that smells too much of alcohol and anise. She takes it without thinking and as luck would have it, it is the most disgusting shot of alcohol she's ever had.
Andrew covers his laughter with a fist. "It's horrible, I know."
Mila tries to put up a frown, but his laughter contagious.
"Emma ordered these, but they taste like crap. I've taken it upon myself to make sure everyone has at least one." Next to him, sits a tray with at least seven shots.
He buys her a beer to get the taste out of her mouth and she tells him this isn't the first time little miss Stone has ordered alcoholic drinks based on the name rather than content.
Cera walks by and they con him into taking a shot.
Andrew high fives her and it's only after they try to get Emma to stop smoking inside the bar that they talk about work and he tells her about his current Facebook movie.
"So show me the accent then."
"It takes a while to get into, You can't ask me to do it on the spot."
"Don't bullshit me about the craft, I starved myself for 5 months in order to fit into a fucking tutu."
"So," Andrew replies in his best East coast accent, "you're not starving yourself anymore? You should let me buy you something for dinner."
"Not bad. Actually, not bad at all."
"We must get rid of the alcohol first though." He says pointing to the tray. "No reason to waste perfectly horrible alcohol."
So maybe Andrew really wants to get dinner and isn't spitting some line from whatever movie or show, either way she has no time to respond because someone is already sandwiching herself between them and pressing a hand to his neck before whispering something and -- Oh. The girl, whoever she is, quickly disappears into the sea of people, leaving Andrew to blush.
"That was my-- that was Shannon. I hate to leave you in charge but I should go. Early flight and all."
"Don't worry about it. I'm pretty sure I can get Emma to drink these."
"Raincheck."
Andrew leaves and Emma drinks three shots but only if Mila agrees to drink the other three.
She looses an earring and stops to get a burrito before heading home.
"So you and Culkin." Emma asks three days after her party extravaganza over waffles.
Mila shrugs. "No me and Culkin anymore. No me and anyone."
"Same thing you said last month, dude."
"I mean it this time, Emma."
Emma snorts, "Is that why you spent the night playing cute with bambi instead of hanging with the cool kids at my party?"
She almost chokes on her orange juice, "What?"
"Oh don't even, you were flirting with him all night."
"Who?"
"Garfield!"
"I was not."
"Mila, your knickers were around your ankles." Emma says in her best British accent.
She throws a small butter packet and hits Emma on the shoulder.
"He's taken though. My man Eisenberg on the other hand, totally needs to get laid."
She runs into both of them at some premiere-awards-celebrity-excuse-to-dress-up thing.
She's at the bar with Natalie and watches them both come in.
They look happy.
"So he bought you a beer while you were moping around from a breakup, big fucking deal Mila." Natalie, the potty mouth, tells her before chugging the rest of her martini.
"What?"
"Emma has a big mouth."
"And she told you this?"
"No, but she told Franco."
"I know the Winklevoss twins, knew actually."
It's Natalie who introduces herself to Shannon who introduces her to Andrew. All while poor Mila was getting a refill.
"How crazy is that, huh? Small world I guess."
Shannon excuses herself to the bathroom and Natalie finds whatever excuse she can to leave as well.
"I still owe you dinner. You did help me get rid of those-- whatever they were."
Mila smiles. "You paid for my drink. We're even."
"Well, if anytime this week you happen to be around the Hilton; all you can eat buffet, courtesy of Paramount."
"Why don't you just get a place here? It's not like the spandex isn't paying off."
Andrew chuckles. "You googled me?
"Don't flatter yourself, blondie told me."
Andrew laughs this time, and Mila feels hot and cold at the same time. She's probably sweating cold right now. And then out of nowhere-- he grabs her phone to make a call. He checks his own and laughs again before hanging up.
"You have my number and I have yours. " He tells her and then makes his way to Shannon.
Andrew sends a photo of the obnoxious red sunglasses Carey got him as a birthday present.
they're very you. she replies.
ouch
i meant they look good on you.
no no. don't even.
It goes on like this for a while.
fuck it. i dont care what you say, they match the spider suit. emms says hi
The phone buzzes again and displays one blonde Emma Stone flipping off the camera.
"Please explain to me why Garfield was talking about you and Timberlake spending a whole month mock-doing it for the cameras."
"Since when am I on-set gossip material, Stone?"
"Well your buddy Timberlake sent him a photo from set and we could clearly see your bare back. Are you method-acting with him?"
"Shut up, you know I'm no Sienna Miller."
"Whatever, I think he may rub one out tonight to that photo."
"What happened to the girlfriend?"
Mila hears Emma giggle. "I knew it! Is it the hair Mila? The perfectly coiffed hair?"
"Go to hell." She tells Emma before hanging up.
Mila texts him two weeks after the whole Timberlake debacle. how's the spandex treating you?
no rash yet. good thing i moisturize
emms told me they are doing all sorts of cgi to make sure the suit is pg-13. She types it out and clicks SEND without thinking about it.
ten seconds later the screen lights up. oh yeahhh
it lights up again. did this come up while you were swapping co-star stories?
obviously. she had to brag while i told her about justin and the baby sock.
ouch.
And just as she thinks the conversation is dead, the screen lights up yet again. you still in NYC? i have a thing this weekend
yeah.
i'll see you then :)
It's so stupid, how a fucking emoticon can make someone smile so much.
They have plans to get sushi (he owes her dinner after all), but plans get shut down after Jesse calls Andrew and practically begs him to go to some NYU party some girl he is sort of but not really seeing is taking him to. Andrew, being Andrew and never saying no to his dear friend, drags Mila with promises of hard liquor and midnight greasy food. Mila, who has nothing better to do, agrees.
The party is kind of lame in the sense that there is a disco ball hanging from the living room ceiling and christmas lights lining the railing of the stairs. Andrew is out there probably praising Jesse and giving him confidence to make a fucking move on the girl. Mila is left downing grape jell-o shots with some weird girl with blue hair.
"Your mouth-- It's purple." Andrew says between laughs and giggles.
"The blue girl kept giving me--" She doesn't finish the sentence. Maybe it's the alcohol, or maybe she just wants to for no reason at all. Either way, she grabs onto the collar of his shirt and kisses him.
He kisses her back, right there in the kitchen of some lame college party, both acting like a couple of teenagers.
Andrew breaks it up and gives her a guilty smile.
She hails a cab and dials Emma.
"You sleeping?"
"Not really."
"Sorry."
Emma laughs into the phone. "Rough night?"
"I've had better-- I think."
"You ok? Need me to call you a cab or something?"
Mila stares at the street lights. "Remind me not to drink jell-o shots ever again."
"What are you, sixteen? Where are you?"
She closes her eyes for a second. "Don't tell Andrew I called." She hangs up before Emma can say anything.
Filming wraps up and she flies back to LA.
The morning of the Golden Globe nominations Emma takes her out for mimosas at Chateau.
"Golden Globe nominee Emma Stone, it has a nice ring to it."
"You're so full of yourself."
"So Garfield broke things with his California Girl. Anything you have to say about that?"
She tries to evade the question by stuffing pain aux chocolate into her mouth.
"Anything to do with jell-o shots?"
"I'm surprised it's taken you this long to bring it up."
"I figured I could let you at least enjoy the fruit."
Before Mila can say anything, her phone buzzes.
congratulations, nominee
"God Mila, you can at least try and act a bit devastated. They were together for years."
likewise. told you you were good
"I can assure you I had nothing to do with it."
Emma snorts. "I know you Kunis. Either way, a toast." She raises her flute a bit. "To being nominated and snagging all the free shit we can get our hands on because of it. Which may or may not include fluffy-haired British men for you." Mila rolls her eyes and clicks the tip of her glass against Emma's.
The phone buzzes again. you liar. you told me my accent wasnt bad
Awards season begins and Mila tries out seven versions of the same dress before settling on a strapless black Monique Lhuillier.
Ryan Reynolds doesn't call her name and Mila thinks it's the perfect excuse to drink Natalie's champagne glass. Which turns into her drinking Darren's champagne, and asking the waiter to bring some more.
During a commercial break, she catches Emma talking to Andrew and shooting her a look.
"Wasn't that old news?" Natalie asks.
Mila shrugs it off and takes one last sip.
10$ says king colin beats us both for best movie. He texts her halfway through the show.
20 says we beat you
overconfident much?
it's one of my best qualities
The Social Network wins and Andrew almost trips going up. Mila smiles too much.
whats that? you owe me 20 pounds.
She's waiting outside for her limo. we use dollars in america. besides kingspeech didnt win either
buy me dinner and we're even.
technically you still owe me dinner
ha ha ha. hey you looked great tonight!
Mila doesn't reply back.
It's not until the after-party, that they run into each other.
Anne is telling her a fascinating story about Franco and how many levels of high he was last monday to rehearsals and Mila wants to kill herself. But she nods at all the right times and laughs whenever Anne thinks she is being funny. Andrew takes her hand and politely tells Anne Emma is looking for Mila and he is sorry to take her but it is kind of urgent.
"What is it with these Disney-bred stars and their fascination for pot?"
Andrew laughs, hand still holding onto her fingers.
They drink a couple of martinis by the edge of a pool and he twirls her around to the faint sound of some electro-music.
He kisses her this time.
She drops her glass and it splatters all over her dress. It doesn't matter, that's what dry cleaning is for. All Mila wants to do is to run her fingers through that hair and smile when Andrew whispers something into her mouth.
"Wait, wait." Andrew tells her. And if he is about to tell they should stop because he is back with his girlfriend, Mila is pretty sure she will punch him in the groin.
He grabs her hand and next thing she knows, they are kicking someone out of the bathroom.
There's kissing and bitting and, why are there so many buttons to a white shirt?
Outside, the song changes and Mila can faintly hear Justin's voice talking about heartbreak and wooing women. She is definitely going to kill him next time he shows up wearing those ridiculous glasses.
"No no, just stop, not here." Mila tells him.
Andrew, being the perfect gentleman he is, doesn't push it.
"But I'm pretty sure you still owe me dinner."
"And you owe me 20 pounds."
"Get me a burger and then we'll see."
Andrew kisses her once again, "Deal."
END.