Faraway, But So Close (Adam/Kris, misc pairings) Rated: R
Title: Faraway, But So Close (Chapter Nine)
Author: xrazorbladesky and georgeegurl
Pairings/Character(s): Adam/Kris, Adam/Gabriel, Kris/Tommy, past Kris/Katy, mentions of Kris/Brad, Kris/Sauli, and Cassidy/Brad.
Warnings:Domestic violence, self-injury, character death(main character), suicide, Supernatural beings, major depression, alcoholism.(Highlight to read)
Rating: R
Words: 4,996
Summary: Brad drags Kris and Tommy out to a concert.
Notes: Sorry about the wait, life has been pretty busy for the both of us. And even worse, Hurricane Sandy is dumping lots of wind and rain on Gege at the moment so she may lose power for a few days.
April 1st, 2016
There was no way that it was happening. There was no way that he was being roped into this. Just no way. How did it happen? He had no clue. Kris had been sitting in this living room watching TV and all of a sudden Brad was there. He had moved into the way of the TV so Kris had to look up at him. That was when he knew Brad had something on his mind. Something that included him. Something that wasn’t going to be...pleasantly in his favor.
He was right. It wasn’t pleasant.
He found himself being pulled into the kitchen where, just so happened, Cassidy had been waiting with a whole load of things. It crowded his whole kitchen. They had clothes, makeup, and...wigs. It made his heart sink. There wasn’t even a choice being asked. No, yes or no’s. He was just being pushed into the chair. Pushed as hard as Brad’s scrawny arms could push, which was pretty hard, if he did say so himself.
“What the fuck are you doing?” Kris asked, staring up at the two men who had wicked grins on their faces. He did not like that. And he did not like the current state of his kitchen. It was not a salon.
“We are going out.” Brad said happily. “To a Lady Gaga concert.”
“No way in hell -”
“You need to get out of the house, honey.” Cassidy said. He was looking through the piles of makeup. “And I know you don’t want to deal with the paps, - we don’t either. So we’re dressing up!”
“Like fuck if I’m going to wear a dress.”
“We have skirts too!” Brad held up a red and black kilt-looking skirt. No fucking way. Other people may have courage to dress up, mainly Brad and Cassidy - but he did not. He was not wearing a skirt out in public! Who knew what the gossip magazines would say if he was caught in it. It would be a whole mess. His publicity team would have to go in overdrive mode.
Sigh. The fact that Kris found himself in a skirt was kind of unnerving. How he got in it really was a mystery. He lost track of everything. Not just how he got into the skirt, but how he got into the makeup, the platform shoes, and... the wig. Or even how he was standing there with both of the guys staring at him like they were sharks ready to stalk their prey. The thought gave Kris shivers. Just looking that them, them looking at him ...it gave him the creeps.
“Yum,” Brad said, stepping closer to him to fidget with something. Of course. Kris hated being pulled in all directions, yanked down and down. Brad had moved his hand down to his pants. Giving a little pull to make sure everything was in tip top shape.
“Hey, don’t do that.”
“It’s not like I haven’t seen it before, Kristopher. If you can remember we did some fumbling around not too long ago.”
Kris’ cheeks brightened to the shade of crimson as his eyes looked over to Cassidy who looked pretty upset. Everything that he ever thought was confirmed in that moment. Cassidy liked Brad.
“When did that happen?” Cassidy asked, his voice breaking up a little bit.
“About a month ago.” Brad said absentmindedly. He looked around the table at all the dresses and sighed dramatically, “Seems like mine was left in the car, I’ll be right back!” He said, waltzing out of the kitchen.
“I wouldn’t have....slept with him if I knew.” Kris said as Cassidy attempted to make himself look busy with makeup. “It just sort of happened -”
“Why should I care? It’s not like he’s my boyfriend or anything.”
“But you love him.”
“Love him?” Cassidy just shook his head. “I do not. It’s not like we’re set up to get married or anything. Brad doesn’t see me like that. He’s just-”
“Brad is just -”
“Having sex with strange men at clubs and or even his friends. Yeah. That’s what Brad is doing.”
“That doesn’t mean you don’t love him any less.”
Cassidy looked up at him, his eyes just staring at him for a moment. “Look who’s talking. It’s not like you ever told Adam how you felt.”
Kris glared at him, “That’s different. Adam and I...We....he was with someone else. And I was too.”
“For only a few months. You know he would have dropped everything...you know, I don’t care. This isn’t something I care to talk about. The two of you were so stupid dancing around your feelings, and me and Brad aren’t anything like you two. He doesn’t want to settle down. He probably won’t ever.”
“Have you talked to him about it?”
“Why would I do that?” Cassidy asked, turning away from him. He walked over to the sink and picked up the lone glass in the strainer before letting water drain into it from the faucet. “Stop being stupid. Why would I ruin things? I’m not Sauli either.”
Kris stared at him, his mouth dropping just a little. He didn’t think that anyone really knew about what had happened between Sauli and him. He was kind of shocked. “You know.”
“Know what?”
“Know about Sauli - know that he said I love you to me.”
Cassidy turned around, leaning against the counter as he brought his glass to his mouth to take a sip of water. “I’m not someone who blurts it out when the other part of the equation doesn’t even consider me as someone who he could actually have a relationship with. On the other hand, apparently Sauli got a little ahead of himself and forgot who he was talking about.”
Kris just stood there, his mouth hanging open. Wow. That was just cruel. Never had he known Cassidy to be that cruel. “I-”
“I found what I was looking for,” Brad said as he entered again. You’re going to want to see what’s waiting in the car. Why don’t you go wait for us? ”
“I - ”
“Oh Kristopher. You should go. Or else prepared to be kidnapped once more. I will do it. Don’t test me.”
“I - “ Kris’ mouth closed. He really didn’t want that to happen again. What he was wearing made him look extra ridiculous. At least they didn’t try to shave his legs. But knowing them, it would have probably been waxing his legs. That seemed like a nightmare. “Fine. I’ll wait in the car.”
“Good puppy.”
April 1st, 2016 Part two
The first thing that Kris saw when he walked outside was Brad’s car. But it wasn’t just Brad’s car that caught his eye. It was the person in the back of Brad’s car. Tommy. It looked like he had been handcuffed to the seat. There was a blonde wig on him, and loads of makeup. But still, Kris could tell that it was Tommy behind all of it. He couldn’t see much of what he was wearing. But he could only imagine.
Kris opened the back door, staring at Tommy. “So they kidnapped you too, huh? Looks like I’m not the only one being dragged to this thing.” He said.
Tommy just stared at him, his other hand trying to free the handcuff. That wasn’t any use, Brad probably had gotten real handcuffs. “I don’t understand why he couldn’t just drag us to some club, I mean, it makes more sense.”
“Because this is Brad we’re talking about.” Kris said. “If he thinks we’re being antisocial brats, he’s going to take us somewhere where there’s over a hundred thousand people. You know him, he’s a pain in the ass.”
“What an asshole.”
“Yeah. Well, he does that best. He’s an ass. Brad is just one of those people that will do anything to piss you off.”
“Well he’s succeeded,” Tommy said. “Who freaking handcuffs someone to the freaking seat?”
“Brad,” Kris said, looking out the window. No sign of the two that were in his house. He wondered what they were doing in there. Honestly, he didn’t even want to know. “Don’t be surprised if those handcuffs were used to handcuff someone to his bedpost.”
“Ew! Get them off! Get them off!”
“Calm down, Ratliff, by the end of the night you won’t even remember. You’ll probably be using them on someone yourself.” Kris smirked.
Tommy was glaring at him. “I’m not Brad or you, I don’t sleep with everyone I lay my eyes on.”
“What -”
“Oh just be quiet, we both don’t want to be here. So why don’t we act miserable and hopefully it will ruin Brad’s night? That’s about all we can hope for.” Tommy turned his head to look out the window, his free hand no longer bothering to mess with the handcuffs.
“You think that would make him miserable?” Kris asked. Of course he didn’t stop. It figured. Kris always did that. Always needed to be the last word. “It won’t. Brad’s the kind of person that doesn’t care either way. He had his fun. Look at us. We’re in horrible wigs dressed up as woman. He had his laugh and will continue to have them.”
“If you let him.”
“Why bother with him? I’m to that point where I just don’t care anymore. He’s going to annoy the fuck out of me regardless of what I do. It’s not like he’s going to stop because that’s not Brad.”
“Why are you talking to me again? Just because we’re stuck in here doesn’t mean we’re actually supposed to fucking talk. Clearly, I don’t want to be here as much as you do.”
April 1st, 2016 Part three
Kris almost refused to get out of the car when they got to the concert. But Brad dug his nails into Kris’ arm and pulled him out of the back seat. At least he wasn’t the only one who looked like a total freak here. And they weren’t the only group in drag either. Of course, he and Tommy were the only two looking very angry about it.
“Why don’t you two just get rid of those scowls you have on,” Brad said. How would you do that? Sure, giving Brad exactly what he wanted was always a must. Brad always wanted everything and he was so used to getting it. Kris never figured it out. Why did no one ever defy him? He was nothing. Brad wasn’t all that intimidating. Just the idea was kind of funny to think about. Brad. Trying to scare someone. Ha.
Kris just wanted the night to end. He liked his plans for the night. Loved them in fact. He was going to just well, go to sleep. He was exhausted. But it wasn’t like he hadn’t pulled all nighters when he was completely worn out.
Tommy kept his scowl painted on as they took their seats. He would have been just fine with laying at home on the couch, drinking a few beers and then passing out. Who needed a social life anymore? Who wanted to go out? The world was full of rude and pushy people. He’d rather watch scary movies and sleep.
The only person that seemed to be enjoying himself was Brad. He’d dragged the two of them out and had Cassidy come along, who let’s face it, would do anything for Brad whether it made him happy or not. Stupid Brad for being an idiot. He didn’t do anything to return that the favor. He took advantage of Cassidy so often that Cassidy just went with it. It wasn’t like he would stick up for himself. That would mean that there was a chance that they weren’t going to be in each other’s lives again. Of course, Cassidy couldn’t risk it.
There was a deep breath just as the show started. Mother Monster herself being lifted up to the stage. Kris really didn’t like her. Nothing about her made him amazed. Except that she was totally out there. In that part, he respected her. But her music? It really wasn’t his cup of tea - or his favorite beer.
He realized as he watched that she was confident. He had wished that he was as confident as her. About midway through, he just couldn’t take any more of it. The music had become just too much for him. All of the over dramatic pop lyrics and generic sounds were just driving him insane.
When he looked over to Brad, his eyes were on the concert going on. Then he looked to Cassidy. He was slumped back in the chair, his arms crossed. He was mad still; Kris could tell. Yeah. He would just slowly but surely make his way towards the door. Moving himself up off of the seat, he looked at Brad to make sure he didn’t feel him. As he moved through the row, he quickly moved past everyone before moving up the aisle and moving quickly out of the door. Thank god. He was out of that stupid room and could now breath. The air was cold, unlike inside. There were so many people crammed into that one space. It was hot. He had to be sweating. But the air made him feel so much better.
His hand went to pull the wig off of his head, running his hand through his hair. Soaked. As he passed a trash can he threw it in. Thank god it was gone. If only he could be so lucky with the skirt and shoes he had on. It wasn’t like he was going to walk on the venue floor barefoot. That was just gross. There was wads of gum every here and there. Just the thought made him feel disgusting.
If only he could ditch this place. But Brad was his way home. And in a way, he didn’t feel like he could leave Cassidy and Tommy there to suffer. Okay, maybe he could leave Tommy because he was being a little bitch like always, but Cassidy didn’t deserve it. He shouldn’t have to sit at a concert he didn’t want to be at just to impress Brad. Cassidy may like Lady Gaga, but he sure wasn’t enjoying himself.
“You think that you can get out of this that easy?” he heard from behind him. “You’re just going to get up and just leave?”
Kris turned to see Tommy standing behind him, arms crossed and he kind of couldn’t help but to laugh. He looked ridiculous. He really did. He had on a short dress that didn’t even come down past his knee caps. What Brad was thinking...Kris had no idea. Then of course, the wig. God. How the fuck did he get there? “I can’t leave. I’m stuck here till the fucking show is over. Fucking Brad is my ride home.”
“Not like there aren’t cabs or even busses that could take you home, right?”
“No, of course not. They’ve vanished off of the fucking earth. I’m taking a spaceship to mars to get away from you.”
“Huh. Just what I expected,” Tommy said. “You’re a fucking alien in disguise.”
“Right, I came from a faraway planet just to annoy you.” Kris sneered.
“Seems like it. All I’ve heard about for the past few weeks is Kris this, Kris that. I can’t seem to shake you,” Tommy said. Two girls that were passing by stared at them, they giggled like, oh look, two drag queens fighting!
Kris wanted to die right there.
“I feel so bad for you. Because for the past few weeks, I’ve been hearing all about you!”
“It couldn’t possibly be worse than hearing about you! ‘Kris is hurting too Tommy, don’t be an asshole,’” Tommy tried to give his best Brad impression, but failed. “You’re the asshole. All you do is fucking mope around the house with that fucking annoying beagle.”
“At least I didn’t try to kill myself! You’re a coward.” Kris shook his head before turning away from him. There was no way that he was going to just stand there and argue with him any longer. It was a waste of his time. He had a lot better things to do...oh, wait. He was still stuck.
The mens room came up on his left and he quickened his pace to get there. At least he could escape there. It wasn’t like anyone would come and interrupt him.
But of course, he was wrong. Tommy came up behind him, pushing him against the wall. “Don’t you fucking dare use that against me! I’m sorry that I have feelings, and I couldn’t handle what happened as well as you did, but we aren’t all fucking robots.” He growled, his knee pushing in between Kris’ legs to try and keep him in place.
“I’m not a robot, I just know that things happen in life -”
“Oh bull, you’re falling apart just like the rest of us. You just don’t want to accept the help.”
“I don’t need people telling me that I’m grieving or asking me stupid questions about how I feel. I’m fine. Get over it. Adam’s fucking gone. You just have to deal with it. That’s how life is. You move on after losses you just don’t go and do things that will make everything a lot worse than they are. Now, can you fucking get the hell away from me?”
Tommy pushed harder into him, his arm moving against his shoulder a little more. “No, you prick. You’re not going anywhere because I won’t give you the luxury. That’s all you want, right? You want me to leav -”
It took all of his might to push Tommy off of him. He hated being pinned against the wall but it didn’t stop him from pinning Tommy against the one across from them. His hands moved with ease. Then he lowered himself in front of Tommy, quickly moving his head under the dress, and pushing the underwear down to Tommy’s knees. He felt Tommy’s body tighten just a bit as pleasure sprung through him.
February 10th, 2013
Kris let out a little laugh as Adam gently bumped into him. They had been out all day. It was kind of uncommon that they both had off. Just getting that text from Adam, made Kris’ day a lot brighter. Weird how something so simple could do that.
“How’s Katy? Is she doing well? It seems like forever since I’ve talked to her.”
“It’s been forever since you’ve talked to anyone.”
Adam nodded gently. “It’s been kind of crazy in my life. I guess you could say I’ve been a little busy. I’ve been recording a lot. Late nights in the studio. You know how it is.”
“I’m not the great Adam Lambert. You have plenty of fans just wanting to hear more stuff from you. I couldn’t even imagine having that many fans. Your fans look up to you. You’re an inspiration to them. I wish I could have that effect on people.”
“You do,” Adam replied. “A lot of people I attract are young girls or older women who just think I’m ‘hot’. Not exactly what I want in a fanbase. I’d rather have people who really like my music, like they do with yours.”
“Oh, they do with yours too. You inspire people.”
“So do you, baby. But lets not talk about work, okay? I just want to spend time with you and relax, you know, like we used to.”
Kris nodded. He missed the Idol house sometimes, when they had time off and the two of them would just lay around in their room and talk about nothing. Talk about their family and things they did back home. Of course, Adam’s life was always interesting, he had party stories and people he had met while working in other countries. Kris didn’t have that. He had dated Katy since high school and hadn’t worked any place interesting. Not even a coffee shop with shady characters.
He was a simple guy with simple things. A simple life with a perfect wife and a dog. The only thing that was missing was the white picket fence. And he didn’t think that had even been in the future when they ended things. Kris didn’t really want to move into a big fancy house. He wanted to stick to his simple apartment. And Adam. Adam had a whole beautiful life ahead of him. He could do fantastic things because he accomplished everything that he wanted. All he had to do was set his eyes on it. God, Kris wished he could do like that. Have his goal right in front of him and just running towards it.
“So, what are we going to do? We’ve been walking for a couple of hours. I swear we’ve past the same shops more than twice.”
“We have,” Adam laughed. “We’ve past them about five times.”
“So there’s nothing that you want to do?”
“What would I want to do? I’m hanging out with you. That’s all that I really could want. I’m happy. I haven’t seen you in ages and I just want to soak it all up.”
“Soak it up?”
“Oh yeah.”
Kris looked around. He loved being around Adam just as much as Adam said he loved being around him. Since they hadn’t seen each other , Kris hadn’t told Adam about what had happen with Katy. He was kind of hesitant to do that. But Adam was his friend. Probably the only friend that he really had these days. “I...I uh -”
“You’re soaking it up too?”
“Yeah. I’m soaking it up. It’s just that...It’s just that things have changed since we’ve last seen each other.”
Adam looked over to him, his eyebrows raised slightly. He truly didn’t think so. They were still Kris and Adam. What more could have happened to that?
“There is,” Kris said. “You don’t think so?”
“I think that things could have but...”
“Katy and I are getting a divorce.”
Adam stopped walking, turning to look at Kris. “I’m sorry you’re....”
“Getting a divorce.”
“Why?”
Kris hesitated. He couldn’t just say, well, I fucked your ex-boyfriend and think I’m gay so Katy thinks it would be a good idea if we divorced. No, he was pretty sure Adam would hit him, and he’s seen Adam mad, it’s not a very pretty sight. “She just thinks that things aren’t working out. That we’re ‘growing apart’, so to say.”
“But you two are so perfect for each other.” Adam said, and he wasn’t sure if he was trying to convince Kris or himself. “This seems so....sudden. Are you sure it isn’t something else? Something you two can’t work out in time?”
Kris shook his head, “To be honest, I don’t think I want to. We got married too young, we only dated each other, it was like we never really got to experience other things. And I can’t expect her to wait around while I’m on tour. She should have someone who’s there for all the time.”
“You’re using that as an excuse?”
“No, of course not. I just can’t be there for her.” It was harder for him to actually tell Adam all of this. Just lying to him. Was he lying? Or was he just keeping the truth from him...weren’t they the same thing?
“Of course you can! Even though you’re on tour you can still be together. Just because you’re on tour doesn’t mean you have to give up on her that easily.”
“No,” Kris shook his head. No. There really was no use in even that. “No. I can’t. I’m not using it as an excuse. Things haven’t been that good with either of us lately. It’s not something new.”
“They haven’t?”
“Yeah. For a while. I haven’t exactly had my heart into it fully. I rather her have someone that’s just there for her, you know? Who can make her feel beautiful. To give her compliments, roses. The little things in life that we used to have. That we’ve grown out of over the years. It’s like all we were doing was living in the same house. We weren’t really...doing anything else.”
“I -” Adam paused and took out his cell phone. He stared at the screen for a few moments and sighed, then looked back up to Kris. “I don’t want to, but I’m going to have to cut this short, I guess there’s a leak in bathroom and Gab’s totally useless when it comes to fixing things, so he needs my help.”
Kris nodded. “As long as you give me a ride back to your house, my car is still there.”
Adam froze for a moment, and then nodded slowly. He had forgotten they drove down here in just his car to save gas. Now, Kris’ car was sitting outside his and Gab’s house. No wonder he wanted Adam home, it had nothing to do with a leaky pipe in the bathroom.
The two rode back to Adam’s place talking about little things. The new contestants on American Idol, Adam’s upcoming tour and Kris and Katy’s dog who was staying with Kris after the divorce. She loved Lux, but she was going to be living with a friend that couldn’t have any pets.
Never was there silence in the car. They talked until the second they parked the car, then it was silence. Kris looked at the house. It was a big house. Just what Adam had always wanted. Something nice. Something that would give him space - his own personal space. It was even nicer on the inside, though he had only had a glance before they had left earlier. Adam seemed like he was in such a hurry. “So....” Kris said, turning back to him.
Adam was just looked straight ahead as his hands clenched the wheel. When Kris noticed, it was like he loosened his grip. “So...”
“This was nice. We should do it again.”
“Yeah. Maybe once tour ends and things calm down again. “
Kris nodded. It was kind of slowly but at the same time pretty hesitant. “Yeah. We should do that. I think we’ll have even more to catch up with then.”
“Yeah. I’m sure we will.”
There was more silence. It was weird how things could go from being all talk to no talk in a matter of moments.
“I should get inside and fix that leak.” Adam said quietly, leaning over the center console to give Kris a goodbye kiss on the cheek. Kris didn’t pull away or flinch, Adam had done it a few times before when they were on tour together. Mostly when he was tipsy, and once before their first show giving him good luck. He didn’t mind, Adam was a very affectionate person.
When Adam pulled away, he jumped. Gabriel was standing outside Kris’ window. He painted on a smile and waved to his boyfriend. It was easy to look as though nothing was wrong. He got out of his seat, and walked over to Gabriel, giving him a hug. “Hi honey,” he said. “The bathroom’s all fucked up again?”
“Yeah,” Gabriel said, his voice was a low growl and Kris was quite scared by it. “Did you two have a good time?”
“Yeah, just walked around town catching up. Nothing too exciting. Maybe you can join us next time.”
“I’ll plan on it.” Gabriel said, “Let’s get inside, the bathroom’s a mess and I’m useless with this stuff. You know me.”
“Yeah. Can’t even fix a broken chair.”
Gabriel eyes grew darker it seemed. Another thing that had scared Kris. Gabriel always seemed like a nice guy. Katy had always talked about him as if he had been a movie star or something. Like he was someone to be talked about. Kris? Kris never really saw it that way. Though, Adam had looked to be happy when he was him.
Adam looked to Kris and gave the gentlest smile. “I’ll see you.” There had to have been shock playing on Kris’ face. Usually Adam would pull him into a hug and say good bye that way. It was never a ‘I’ll see you’. He took a step towards Adam but he backed away. “I’ll see you around, Kris.”
“Y-yeah. I’ll - I’ll see you around.”
He watched as he walked away, Gabriel walking behind him. He felt looked so...so...hopeless?
No way.
Author: xrazorbladesky and georgeegurl
Pairings/Character(s): Adam/Kris, Adam/Gabriel, Kris/Tommy, past Kris/Katy, mentions of Kris/Brad, Kris/Sauli, and Cassidy/Brad.
Warnings:Domestic violence, self-injury, character death(main character), suicide, Supernatural beings, major depression, alcoholism.(Highlight to read)
Rating: R
Words: 4,996
Summary: Brad drags Kris and Tommy out to a concert.
Notes: Sorry about the wait, life has been pretty busy for the both of us. And even worse, Hurricane Sandy is dumping lots of wind and rain on Gege at the moment so she may lose power for a few days.
April 1st, 2016
There was no way that it was happening. There was no way that he was being roped into this. Just no way. How did it happen? He had no clue. Kris had been sitting in this living room watching TV and all of a sudden Brad was there. He had moved into the way of the TV so Kris had to look up at him. That was when he knew Brad had something on his mind. Something that included him. Something that wasn’t going to be...pleasantly in his favor.
He was right. It wasn’t pleasant.
He found himself being pulled into the kitchen where, just so happened, Cassidy had been waiting with a whole load of things. It crowded his whole kitchen. They had clothes, makeup, and...wigs. It made his heart sink. There wasn’t even a choice being asked. No, yes or no’s. He was just being pushed into the chair. Pushed as hard as Brad’s scrawny arms could push, which was pretty hard, if he did say so himself.
“What the fuck are you doing?” Kris asked, staring up at the two men who had wicked grins on their faces. He did not like that. And he did not like the current state of his kitchen. It was not a salon.
“We are going out.” Brad said happily. “To a Lady Gaga concert.”
“No way in hell -”
“You need to get out of the house, honey.” Cassidy said. He was looking through the piles of makeup. “And I know you don’t want to deal with the paps, - we don’t either. So we’re dressing up!”
“Like fuck if I’m going to wear a dress.”
“We have skirts too!” Brad held up a red and black kilt-looking skirt. No fucking way. Other people may have courage to dress up, mainly Brad and Cassidy - but he did not. He was not wearing a skirt out in public! Who knew what the gossip magazines would say if he was caught in it. It would be a whole mess. His publicity team would have to go in overdrive mode.
Sigh. The fact that Kris found himself in a skirt was kind of unnerving. How he got in it really was a mystery. He lost track of everything. Not just how he got into the skirt, but how he got into the makeup, the platform shoes, and... the wig. Or even how he was standing there with both of the guys staring at him like they were sharks ready to stalk their prey. The thought gave Kris shivers. Just looking that them, them looking at him ...it gave him the creeps.
“Yum,” Brad said, stepping closer to him to fidget with something. Of course. Kris hated being pulled in all directions, yanked down and down. Brad had moved his hand down to his pants. Giving a little pull to make sure everything was in tip top shape.
“Hey, don’t do that.”
“It’s not like I haven’t seen it before, Kristopher. If you can remember we did some fumbling around not too long ago.”
Kris’ cheeks brightened to the shade of crimson as his eyes looked over to Cassidy who looked pretty upset. Everything that he ever thought was confirmed in that moment. Cassidy liked Brad.
“When did that happen?” Cassidy asked, his voice breaking up a little bit.
“About a month ago.” Brad said absentmindedly. He looked around the table at all the dresses and sighed dramatically, “Seems like mine was left in the car, I’ll be right back!” He said, waltzing out of the kitchen.
“I wouldn’t have....slept with him if I knew.” Kris said as Cassidy attempted to make himself look busy with makeup. “It just sort of happened -”
“Why should I care? It’s not like he’s my boyfriend or anything.”
“But you love him.”
“Love him?” Cassidy just shook his head. “I do not. It’s not like we’re set up to get married or anything. Brad doesn’t see me like that. He’s just-”
“Brad is just -”
“Having sex with strange men at clubs and or even his friends. Yeah. That’s what Brad is doing.”
“That doesn’t mean you don’t love him any less.”
Cassidy looked up at him, his eyes just staring at him for a moment. “Look who’s talking. It’s not like you ever told Adam how you felt.”
Kris glared at him, “That’s different. Adam and I...We....he was with someone else. And I was too.”
“For only a few months. You know he would have dropped everything...you know, I don’t care. This isn’t something I care to talk about. The two of you were so stupid dancing around your feelings, and me and Brad aren’t anything like you two. He doesn’t want to settle down. He probably won’t ever.”
“Have you talked to him about it?”
“Why would I do that?” Cassidy asked, turning away from him. He walked over to the sink and picked up the lone glass in the strainer before letting water drain into it from the faucet. “Stop being stupid. Why would I ruin things? I’m not Sauli either.”
Kris stared at him, his mouth dropping just a little. He didn’t think that anyone really knew about what had happened between Sauli and him. He was kind of shocked. “You know.”
“Know what?”
“Know about Sauli - know that he said I love you to me.”
Cassidy turned around, leaning against the counter as he brought his glass to his mouth to take a sip of water. “I’m not someone who blurts it out when the other part of the equation doesn’t even consider me as someone who he could actually have a relationship with. On the other hand, apparently Sauli got a little ahead of himself and forgot who he was talking about.”
Kris just stood there, his mouth hanging open. Wow. That was just cruel. Never had he known Cassidy to be that cruel. “I-”
“I found what I was looking for,” Brad said as he entered again. You’re going to want to see what’s waiting in the car. Why don’t you go wait for us? ”
“I - ”
“Oh Kristopher. You should go. Or else prepared to be kidnapped once more. I will do it. Don’t test me.”
“I - “ Kris’ mouth closed. He really didn’t want that to happen again. What he was wearing made him look extra ridiculous. At least they didn’t try to shave his legs. But knowing them, it would have probably been waxing his legs. That seemed like a nightmare. “Fine. I’ll wait in the car.”
“Good puppy.”
April 1st, 2016 Part two
The first thing that Kris saw when he walked outside was Brad’s car. But it wasn’t just Brad’s car that caught his eye. It was the person in the back of Brad’s car. Tommy. It looked like he had been handcuffed to the seat. There was a blonde wig on him, and loads of makeup. But still, Kris could tell that it was Tommy behind all of it. He couldn’t see much of what he was wearing. But he could only imagine.
Kris opened the back door, staring at Tommy. “So they kidnapped you too, huh? Looks like I’m not the only one being dragged to this thing.” He said.
Tommy just stared at him, his other hand trying to free the handcuff. That wasn’t any use, Brad probably had gotten real handcuffs. “I don’t understand why he couldn’t just drag us to some club, I mean, it makes more sense.”
“Because this is Brad we’re talking about.” Kris said. “If he thinks we’re being antisocial brats, he’s going to take us somewhere where there’s over a hundred thousand people. You know him, he’s a pain in the ass.”
“What an asshole.”
“Yeah. Well, he does that best. He’s an ass. Brad is just one of those people that will do anything to piss you off.”
“Well he’s succeeded,” Tommy said. “Who freaking handcuffs someone to the freaking seat?”
“Brad,” Kris said, looking out the window. No sign of the two that were in his house. He wondered what they were doing in there. Honestly, he didn’t even want to know. “Don’t be surprised if those handcuffs were used to handcuff someone to his bedpost.”
“Ew! Get them off! Get them off!”
“Calm down, Ratliff, by the end of the night you won’t even remember. You’ll probably be using them on someone yourself.” Kris smirked.
Tommy was glaring at him. “I’m not Brad or you, I don’t sleep with everyone I lay my eyes on.”
“What -”
“Oh just be quiet, we both don’t want to be here. So why don’t we act miserable and hopefully it will ruin Brad’s night? That’s about all we can hope for.” Tommy turned his head to look out the window, his free hand no longer bothering to mess with the handcuffs.
“You think that would make him miserable?” Kris asked. Of course he didn’t stop. It figured. Kris always did that. Always needed to be the last word. “It won’t. Brad’s the kind of person that doesn’t care either way. He had his fun. Look at us. We’re in horrible wigs dressed up as woman. He had his laugh and will continue to have them.”
“If you let him.”
“Why bother with him? I’m to that point where I just don’t care anymore. He’s going to annoy the fuck out of me regardless of what I do. It’s not like he’s going to stop because that’s not Brad.”
“Why are you talking to me again? Just because we’re stuck in here doesn’t mean we’re actually supposed to fucking talk. Clearly, I don’t want to be here as much as you do.”
April 1st, 2016 Part three
Kris almost refused to get out of the car when they got to the concert. But Brad dug his nails into Kris’ arm and pulled him out of the back seat. At least he wasn’t the only one who looked like a total freak here. And they weren’t the only group in drag either. Of course, he and Tommy were the only two looking very angry about it.
“Why don’t you two just get rid of those scowls you have on,” Brad said. How would you do that? Sure, giving Brad exactly what he wanted was always a must. Brad always wanted everything and he was so used to getting it. Kris never figured it out. Why did no one ever defy him? He was nothing. Brad wasn’t all that intimidating. Just the idea was kind of funny to think about. Brad. Trying to scare someone. Ha.
Kris just wanted the night to end. He liked his plans for the night. Loved them in fact. He was going to just well, go to sleep. He was exhausted. But it wasn’t like he hadn’t pulled all nighters when he was completely worn out.
Tommy kept his scowl painted on as they took their seats. He would have been just fine with laying at home on the couch, drinking a few beers and then passing out. Who needed a social life anymore? Who wanted to go out? The world was full of rude and pushy people. He’d rather watch scary movies and sleep.
The only person that seemed to be enjoying himself was Brad. He’d dragged the two of them out and had Cassidy come along, who let’s face it, would do anything for Brad whether it made him happy or not. Stupid Brad for being an idiot. He didn’t do anything to return that the favor. He took advantage of Cassidy so often that Cassidy just went with it. It wasn’t like he would stick up for himself. That would mean that there was a chance that they weren’t going to be in each other’s lives again. Of course, Cassidy couldn’t risk it.
There was a deep breath just as the show started. Mother Monster herself being lifted up to the stage. Kris really didn’t like her. Nothing about her made him amazed. Except that she was totally out there. In that part, he respected her. But her music? It really wasn’t his cup of tea - or his favorite beer.
He realized as he watched that she was confident. He had wished that he was as confident as her. About midway through, he just couldn’t take any more of it. The music had become just too much for him. All of the over dramatic pop lyrics and generic sounds were just driving him insane.
When he looked over to Brad, his eyes were on the concert going on. Then he looked to Cassidy. He was slumped back in the chair, his arms crossed. He was mad still; Kris could tell. Yeah. He would just slowly but surely make his way towards the door. Moving himself up off of the seat, he looked at Brad to make sure he didn’t feel him. As he moved through the row, he quickly moved past everyone before moving up the aisle and moving quickly out of the door. Thank god. He was out of that stupid room and could now breath. The air was cold, unlike inside. There were so many people crammed into that one space. It was hot. He had to be sweating. But the air made him feel so much better.
His hand went to pull the wig off of his head, running his hand through his hair. Soaked. As he passed a trash can he threw it in. Thank god it was gone. If only he could be so lucky with the skirt and shoes he had on. It wasn’t like he was going to walk on the venue floor barefoot. That was just gross. There was wads of gum every here and there. Just the thought made him feel disgusting.
If only he could ditch this place. But Brad was his way home. And in a way, he didn’t feel like he could leave Cassidy and Tommy there to suffer. Okay, maybe he could leave Tommy because he was being a little bitch like always, but Cassidy didn’t deserve it. He shouldn’t have to sit at a concert he didn’t want to be at just to impress Brad. Cassidy may like Lady Gaga, but he sure wasn’t enjoying himself.
“You think that you can get out of this that easy?” he heard from behind him. “You’re just going to get up and just leave?”
Kris turned to see Tommy standing behind him, arms crossed and he kind of couldn’t help but to laugh. He looked ridiculous. He really did. He had on a short dress that didn’t even come down past his knee caps. What Brad was thinking...Kris had no idea. Then of course, the wig. God. How the fuck did he get there? “I can’t leave. I’m stuck here till the fucking show is over. Fucking Brad is my ride home.”
“Not like there aren’t cabs or even busses that could take you home, right?”
“No, of course not. They’ve vanished off of the fucking earth. I’m taking a spaceship to mars to get away from you.”
“Huh. Just what I expected,” Tommy said. “You’re a fucking alien in disguise.”
“Right, I came from a faraway planet just to annoy you.” Kris sneered.
“Seems like it. All I’ve heard about for the past few weeks is Kris this, Kris that. I can’t seem to shake you,” Tommy said. Two girls that were passing by stared at them, they giggled like, oh look, two drag queens fighting!
Kris wanted to die right there.
“I feel so bad for you. Because for the past few weeks, I’ve been hearing all about you!”
“It couldn’t possibly be worse than hearing about you! ‘Kris is hurting too Tommy, don’t be an asshole,’” Tommy tried to give his best Brad impression, but failed. “You’re the asshole. All you do is fucking mope around the house with that fucking annoying beagle.”
“At least I didn’t try to kill myself! You’re a coward.” Kris shook his head before turning away from him. There was no way that he was going to just stand there and argue with him any longer. It was a waste of his time. He had a lot better things to do...oh, wait. He was still stuck.
The mens room came up on his left and he quickened his pace to get there. At least he could escape there. It wasn’t like anyone would come and interrupt him.
But of course, he was wrong. Tommy came up behind him, pushing him against the wall. “Don’t you fucking dare use that against me! I’m sorry that I have feelings, and I couldn’t handle what happened as well as you did, but we aren’t all fucking robots.” He growled, his knee pushing in between Kris’ legs to try and keep him in place.
“I’m not a robot, I just know that things happen in life -”
“Oh bull, you’re falling apart just like the rest of us. You just don’t want to accept the help.”
“I don’t need people telling me that I’m grieving or asking me stupid questions about how I feel. I’m fine. Get over it. Adam’s fucking gone. You just have to deal with it. That’s how life is. You move on after losses you just don’t go and do things that will make everything a lot worse than they are. Now, can you fucking get the hell away from me?”
Tommy pushed harder into him, his arm moving against his shoulder a little more. “No, you prick. You’re not going anywhere because I won’t give you the luxury. That’s all you want, right? You want me to leav -”
It took all of his might to push Tommy off of him. He hated being pinned against the wall but it didn’t stop him from pinning Tommy against the one across from them. His hands moved with ease. Then he lowered himself in front of Tommy, quickly moving his head under the dress, and pushing the underwear down to Tommy’s knees. He felt Tommy’s body tighten just a bit as pleasure sprung through him.
February 10th, 2013
Kris let out a little laugh as Adam gently bumped into him. They had been out all day. It was kind of uncommon that they both had off. Just getting that text from Adam, made Kris’ day a lot brighter. Weird how something so simple could do that.
“How’s Katy? Is she doing well? It seems like forever since I’ve talked to her.”
“It’s been forever since you’ve talked to anyone.”
Adam nodded gently. “It’s been kind of crazy in my life. I guess you could say I’ve been a little busy. I’ve been recording a lot. Late nights in the studio. You know how it is.”
“I’m not the great Adam Lambert. You have plenty of fans just wanting to hear more stuff from you. I couldn’t even imagine having that many fans. Your fans look up to you. You’re an inspiration to them. I wish I could have that effect on people.”
“You do,” Adam replied. “A lot of people I attract are young girls or older women who just think I’m ‘hot’. Not exactly what I want in a fanbase. I’d rather have people who really like my music, like they do with yours.”
“Oh, they do with yours too. You inspire people.”
“So do you, baby. But lets not talk about work, okay? I just want to spend time with you and relax, you know, like we used to.”
Kris nodded. He missed the Idol house sometimes, when they had time off and the two of them would just lay around in their room and talk about nothing. Talk about their family and things they did back home. Of course, Adam’s life was always interesting, he had party stories and people he had met while working in other countries. Kris didn’t have that. He had dated Katy since high school and hadn’t worked any place interesting. Not even a coffee shop with shady characters.
He was a simple guy with simple things. A simple life with a perfect wife and a dog. The only thing that was missing was the white picket fence. And he didn’t think that had even been in the future when they ended things. Kris didn’t really want to move into a big fancy house. He wanted to stick to his simple apartment. And Adam. Adam had a whole beautiful life ahead of him. He could do fantastic things because he accomplished everything that he wanted. All he had to do was set his eyes on it. God, Kris wished he could do like that. Have his goal right in front of him and just running towards it.
“So, what are we going to do? We’ve been walking for a couple of hours. I swear we’ve past the same shops more than twice.”
“We have,” Adam laughed. “We’ve past them about five times.”
“So there’s nothing that you want to do?”
“What would I want to do? I’m hanging out with you. That’s all that I really could want. I’m happy. I haven’t seen you in ages and I just want to soak it all up.”
“Soak it up?”
“Oh yeah.”
Kris looked around. He loved being around Adam just as much as Adam said he loved being around him. Since they hadn’t seen each other , Kris hadn’t told Adam about what had happen with Katy. He was kind of hesitant to do that. But Adam was his friend. Probably the only friend that he really had these days. “I...I uh -”
“You’re soaking it up too?”
“Yeah. I’m soaking it up. It’s just that...It’s just that things have changed since we’ve last seen each other.”
Adam looked over to him, his eyebrows raised slightly. He truly didn’t think so. They were still Kris and Adam. What more could have happened to that?
“There is,” Kris said. “You don’t think so?”
“I think that things could have but...”
“Katy and I are getting a divorce.”
Adam stopped walking, turning to look at Kris. “I’m sorry you’re....”
“Getting a divorce.”
“Why?”
Kris hesitated. He couldn’t just say, well, I fucked your ex-boyfriend and think I’m gay so Katy thinks it would be a good idea if we divorced. No, he was pretty sure Adam would hit him, and he’s seen Adam mad, it’s not a very pretty sight. “She just thinks that things aren’t working out. That we’re ‘growing apart’, so to say.”
“But you two are so perfect for each other.” Adam said, and he wasn’t sure if he was trying to convince Kris or himself. “This seems so....sudden. Are you sure it isn’t something else? Something you two can’t work out in time?”
Kris shook his head, “To be honest, I don’t think I want to. We got married too young, we only dated each other, it was like we never really got to experience other things. And I can’t expect her to wait around while I’m on tour. She should have someone who’s there for all the time.”
“You’re using that as an excuse?”
“No, of course not. I just can’t be there for her.” It was harder for him to actually tell Adam all of this. Just lying to him. Was he lying? Or was he just keeping the truth from him...weren’t they the same thing?
“Of course you can! Even though you’re on tour you can still be together. Just because you’re on tour doesn’t mean you have to give up on her that easily.”
“No,” Kris shook his head. No. There really was no use in even that. “No. I can’t. I’m not using it as an excuse. Things haven’t been that good with either of us lately. It’s not something new.”
“They haven’t?”
“Yeah. For a while. I haven’t exactly had my heart into it fully. I rather her have someone that’s just there for her, you know? Who can make her feel beautiful. To give her compliments, roses. The little things in life that we used to have. That we’ve grown out of over the years. It’s like all we were doing was living in the same house. We weren’t really...doing anything else.”
“I -” Adam paused and took out his cell phone. He stared at the screen for a few moments and sighed, then looked back up to Kris. “I don’t want to, but I’m going to have to cut this short, I guess there’s a leak in bathroom and Gab’s totally useless when it comes to fixing things, so he needs my help.”
Kris nodded. “As long as you give me a ride back to your house, my car is still there.”
Adam froze for a moment, and then nodded slowly. He had forgotten they drove down here in just his car to save gas. Now, Kris’ car was sitting outside his and Gab’s house. No wonder he wanted Adam home, it had nothing to do with a leaky pipe in the bathroom.
The two rode back to Adam’s place talking about little things. The new contestants on American Idol, Adam’s upcoming tour and Kris and Katy’s dog who was staying with Kris after the divorce. She loved Lux, but she was going to be living with a friend that couldn’t have any pets.
Never was there silence in the car. They talked until the second they parked the car, then it was silence. Kris looked at the house. It was a big house. Just what Adam had always wanted. Something nice. Something that would give him space - his own personal space. It was even nicer on the inside, though he had only had a glance before they had left earlier. Adam seemed like he was in such a hurry. “So....” Kris said, turning back to him.
Adam was just looked straight ahead as his hands clenched the wheel. When Kris noticed, it was like he loosened his grip. “So...”
“This was nice. We should do it again.”
“Yeah. Maybe once tour ends and things calm down again. “
Kris nodded. It was kind of slowly but at the same time pretty hesitant. “Yeah. We should do that. I think we’ll have even more to catch up with then.”
“Yeah. I’m sure we will.”
There was more silence. It was weird how things could go from being all talk to no talk in a matter of moments.
“I should get inside and fix that leak.” Adam said quietly, leaning over the center console to give Kris a goodbye kiss on the cheek. Kris didn’t pull away or flinch, Adam had done it a few times before when they were on tour together. Mostly when he was tipsy, and once before their first show giving him good luck. He didn’t mind, Adam was a very affectionate person.
When Adam pulled away, he jumped. Gabriel was standing outside Kris’ window. He painted on a smile and waved to his boyfriend. It was easy to look as though nothing was wrong. He got out of his seat, and walked over to Gabriel, giving him a hug. “Hi honey,” he said. “The bathroom’s all fucked up again?”
“Yeah,” Gabriel said, his voice was a low growl and Kris was quite scared by it. “Did you two have a good time?”
“Yeah, just walked around town catching up. Nothing too exciting. Maybe you can join us next time.”
“I’ll plan on it.” Gabriel said, “Let’s get inside, the bathroom’s a mess and I’m useless with this stuff. You know me.”
“Yeah. Can’t even fix a broken chair.”
Gabriel eyes grew darker it seemed. Another thing that had scared Kris. Gabriel always seemed like a nice guy. Katy had always talked about him as if he had been a movie star or something. Like he was someone to be talked about. Kris? Kris never really saw it that way. Though, Adam had looked to be happy when he was him.
Adam looked to Kris and gave the gentlest smile. “I’ll see you.” There had to have been shock playing on Kris’ face. Usually Adam would pull him into a hug and say good bye that way. It was never a ‘I’ll see you’. He took a step towards Adam but he backed away. “I’ll see you around, Kris.”
“Y-yeah. I’ll - I’ll see you around.”
He watched as he walked away, Gabriel walking behind him. He felt looked so...so...hopeless?
No way.