Leave a comment

Comments 8

idioticonion September 16 2010, 17:14:21 UTC
Dude! That just hurt my head! When I started reading, I was sure Neil was cheating on David (as I'm sure you intended), but then it was JOSH??? That's a great twist.

However, I think I would have liked some background about why Josh is in love with Neil, when it started, and if Neil ever returned the affection at all? To make it a little more believable?

(I actually ship NPH/Josh hugely!)

Reply

bowsie22 September 16 2010, 17:38:56 UTC
I'm not a huge Neil/Josh fan, sorry, so I'll probably never write anything about them, sorry. Thanks for reading :D

Reply


railynn86 September 16 2010, 17:53:29 UTC
I agree with idioticonion it would be nice to have some kind of backround as to why Josh is in love with Neil and if Neil ever made Josh feel like he had a shot with him. Even if you dont write anymore new fiction on Neil/Josh, maybe just add to this one.

Other than that it was a good story, a great twist. Everyone who reads this is first gonna think Neil is cheating on David, and be shocked to learn its Josh. So that a great twist.

But maybe just add to the story make it a little longer, it might be just to short.

Reply

bowsie22 September 16 2010, 19:20:10 UTC
Hm, I may do another story where Neil explains their back story. Thank for reading :D

Reply


mizzchoco September 16 2010, 22:41:23 UTC
WOW!!! This is REALLY creative. i would have never thougtht about writing something like this!

Im relieved that it wasnt David, but it was somewhat sorry for Josh, though. :(

Reply

bowsie22 September 17 2010, 12:06:03 UTC
Thanks for reading :D

Reply


lewisme September 17 2010, 01:53:12 UTC
I was terrified to read this. Seriously. I don't think I could ever have forgiven you if you made David or Neil cheat.
Oh, this was excellent and heart-wrenching in all the right ways. And I'm going to add my name to the petition for you to write more about poor Josh!

Reply

bowsie22 September 17 2010, 12:07:58 UTC
I've started writing a prequel to this where Neil explains his back story with Josh. Thanks for reading :D

Reply


Leave a comment

Up