Dude! That just hurt my head! When I started reading, I was sure Neil was cheating on David (as I'm sure you intended), but then it was JOSH??? That's a great twist.
However, I think I would have liked some background about why Josh is in love with Neil, when it started, and if Neil ever returned the affection at all? To make it a little more believable?
I agree with idioticonion it would be nice to have some kind of backround as to why Josh is in love with Neil and if Neil ever made Josh feel like he had a shot with him. Even if you dont write anymore new fiction on Neil/Josh, maybe just add to this one.
Other than that it was a good story, a great twist. Everyone who reads this is first gonna think Neil is cheating on David, and be shocked to learn its Josh. So that a great twist.
But maybe just add to the story make it a little longer, it might be just to short.
I was terrified to read this. Seriously. I don't think I could ever have forgiven you if you made David or Neil cheat. Oh, this was excellent and heart-wrenching in all the right ways. And I'm going to add my name to the petition for you to write more about poor Josh!
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However, I think I would have liked some background about why Josh is in love with Neil, when it started, and if Neil ever returned the affection at all? To make it a little more believable?
(I actually ship NPH/Josh hugely!)
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Other than that it was a good story, a great twist. Everyone who reads this is first gonna think Neil is cheating on David, and be shocked to learn its Josh. So that a great twist.
But maybe just add to the story make it a little longer, it might be just to short.
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Im relieved that it wasnt David, but it was somewhat sorry for Josh, though. :(
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Oh, this was excellent and heart-wrenching in all the right ways. And I'm going to add my name to the petition for you to write more about poor Josh!
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