THE OTHER TRAIN ( Read more... )

ANOTHER SUBWAY EPITAPH

Here lie the bones of Alexander Koppel:
At 96th, at rush hour, Jesus beckoned.
His body, though, stood straight and couldn't topple
Till everyone got off at 42nd.

Britney Spears Shaves Her Head ( Read more... )

New York has just released its official city condoms---designed with a colorful subway theme that I'm actually quite fond of. But here's the problem: yesterday, the daily magazine amNewYork took on the Official New York Condoms as its cover story...and the best headline they could come up with was this ( Read more... )

(from bourboncowboy.blogspot.com ( Read more... )

I'll be interviewed this weekend (along with many of my wonderful puzzle friends) on NPR's "This American Life." The episode is titled "Quiz Shows" and apparently I'm in the second segment. (If you've never heard of the show, shame on you! It launched the careers of David Sedaris, Sarah Vowell, and David Rakoff, among other bestselling essayists, ( Read more... )

(An oldie I wrote when I lived in Kansas City, but it's still relevant:)

THE WAGES OF SNOW

Oh I wish that I lived on a tropical isthmus,
Where the sun is as hot as a tannery!
For the wages of having a really white Christhmus
Is a hideous, slush-ridden Jannery.

I haven’t had much luck with Valentine’s Day. The first time I had a real Valentine’s Day, with a girlfriend and everything, was when I was 22, and that was amazing. We watched an old movie, she made lasagna, and we actually spent the night together. (We didn’t do anything because I was still a conservative Christian. But it was nice.) But since I ( Read more... )

(from bourboncowboy.blogspot.com ( Read more... )

Turns out there was a flaw in my plan. Let's say you're me, and you load up four boxes of books. All together, it probably weighs over 200 pounds, but it's on a wheeled dolly/handtruck, so who cares, right? If you then go to the subway (there's an elevator to take you down!) and then down some stairs to the platform (dragging things down is easy ( Read more... )