LJ Idol: Friends & Rivals - Week 1 - Trust Everyone, but Cut the Cards

[bookishgeek]

Twenty OneMy grandfather taught me to count with a worn deck of playing cards. Smoothed over with time and endless flips end-over-end, the cards ran like rain out of a gutter across the lacquered table top, often skidding onto the floor. He would hold me on his lap with a weathered hand cinched around my tiny waist, the other hand flipping through

Comments

[tijuanagringo]

Wonderful. You really had me going. Thank you.

[ragnarok_08]

This was really something - well done!!

[bleodswean]

Very moving. Sweet and yet deeply real.

[bad_tibbers]

A very strong start. You packed lots of emotion into a very simple scene. Well played...

[banyangirl1832]

WOW. Awesome tension, great pacing, killer final line. Win!