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elettaria October 17 2012, 14:32:35 UTC
Gah. Sounds infuriating. I really don't like marriage, I hope that it will quietly fade out of existence, but while it's still here and still popular, it should be made as good as possible, and that means introducing equal marriage. Marriage rights are fairly fundamental as civil rights go, and thus have a profound impact on how the group in question is viewed within a society. Ditto for the right to have children within a socially accepted framework. I may not want to get married, and I can't have kids, but I certainly want equal rights to do so regardless of the gender of my partner.

And what's with the whole "gay marriage" thing? Even if they don't like "equal marriage", what's wrong with calling it "same-sex marriage" and acknowledging that bisexuals actually exist? Did they even use the word LGBT at any point?

And GAYSBIANS?!

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symkha October 17 2012, 15:09:38 UTC
Yeah, "gaysbians" are apparently the mainstream among us. A lot of the authors are opposed to marriage because it reinforces some kind of neoliberal idea of what forms a family, and uses that definition to bestow certain rights and benefits on people that everyone should actually be entitled to, whether you're the Baldwin Sisters from the Waltons - straight, related but unmarried -- in a queer relatoionship -- maybe some kind of polyamorous family makeup - or single. I do actually agree with that; you should be able to get those same tax breaks and whatnot whether you're single (I also think you should be able to count animal companions as dependents ( ... )

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elettaria October 17 2012, 19:05:24 UTC
Oh dear. An entire book full of people who haven't spotted that marriage isn't going to magically disappear just because they don't like it. Would they really rather live in a world where marriage continues to be heterosexist, or one where we have equal marriage? And I absolutely agree that we need better partnership rights generally (incidentally, I'm in Scotland, but we're having the same debate over here, with some truly nasty bigots comparing the equal marriage movement to Nazis of late), but I think that equal marriage helps pave the way for that, so it's all part of the same battle. I'm not too bothered about the money being thrown at it (possibly the British campaigns are being done on a smaller budget, mind you!) because I think that bringing in equal marriage is a massive milestone that will really help to shift cultural attitudes and thus have a knock-on effect on everything else.

I'm vegan too!

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symkha October 18 2012, 22:34:11 UTC
Oh yay, vegan! Mind if I add you as a LJ friend? Everyone has fled LJ for Facebook these days... makes for boring time here. :)

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venomlaced October 20 2012, 04:16:17 UTC
Well after reading this and your comments, I agree with you. We're both apparently sensitive to the issues in the book but tone really is everything ( ... )

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symkha October 22 2012, 00:02:23 UTC
Nicely said! :)

Not all the essays were that bad, but most were.

And I agree, it's the kind of thing that's so polarizing: you're with us or against us, but anyway, we don't want you with us exactly because we don't want to assimilate.

I don't want to assimilate into mainstream culture and likely never will be seen that way. (thankfully) But I've learned through long hard experience that while some things are black and white, most aren't. And alienating people you hope to draw to your viewpoint is not going to get most of them to reconsider.

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