(no subject)
Title: Pain & Love pt4
Author: veiledndarkness
Rating: Hard R
Summary: Sometimes the one person you trust the most can turn out to be the worst person for you.
Warnings:
This is by far the most alternate universe story I've ever started. Evelyn is alive in this one but all is not well. Bobby is extremely, extremely different in this story. He is similar in many ways to his character in Four Brothers, but this is a different side of Bobby, one that isn't fully explored in the movie. This is one way Bobby might have been if they had developed his character more and made him less able to deal with problems.
******************************
Jack stared out the window of the car, wishing that he was a fly on the ceiling in the house right then. He sighed despondently as Angel pulled into the parking lot of the local pharmacy. He turned and gave Angel a pleading look.
“Can’t I just wait in the car?” he asked.
Angel shook his head. “Sorry Jackie, you gotta come with me. ‘Sides, the pharmacist will wanna talk to you.”
Jack sat back heavily in his seat, the beginnings of a pout on his face. Angel laughed under his breath. “Sulk all ya want, you’re still coming with.”
With an annoyed sigh, Jack got out of the car, his arm cradled protectively against his chest. He winced as he banged it off the store door. Angel was right behind him then, grabbing the door.
“When are you gonna learn that sometimes you need help Jack?” Angel asked as Jack walked past him. Jack stiffened slightly. He turned and gave Angel a dirty look.
“I don’t need your help to open a door Angel!” he snapped.
“With a busted arm you do, so shut your mouth brat,” Angel chided affectionately.
“Nothing you can say that’s gonna stop me from looking after you,” he added a moment later.
Jack walked down the aisles; shoulders slumped over as they made their way to the counter. Angel ignored Jack’s behavior. He understood why Jack was acting childish; it was a way to guard himself. Act bratty and the adults around you will leave you alone.
He smiled as he recalled how much of a snarky brat Jack could be when he was scared or nervous. The smile fell as he also recalled that the brat side of Jack was flimsy at best and that he could be hurt so easily by other’s words, let alone their fists.
They stopped at the counter and waited for one of the pharmacists to notice them. After a moment or so of waiting, one of the pharmacists came over to get the prescriptions. Jack quickly grew bored of the conversation and went to sit on one of the uncomfortable chairs off to the side. He felt overly self-conscious of the sling around his arm and the splint on his nose. He was all too aware of how badly his face was bruised.
Jack practiced his scowl on the other curious customers who stared just a little too long at him. He smiled triumphantly when an old man who had been about to ask what happened, changed his mind at the nasty look Jack gave him.
‘Bobby would have been proud’, he thought with a grin.
Bobby.
Like a switch that been flipped, his smile vanished. He began to gnaw on his lower lip as he worried about what Evelyn must have been saying to him. He was afraid that in her efforts to help him, that things would only get worse. Jack feared exactly what it would take to push Bobby one step too far. He glanced down at his arm again. ‘Not much’, he thought sadly.
Jack sighed then. Angel rounded the corner and nodded at him. He dragged himself up and out of the chair, favoring his injured leg. The pharmacist spoke with Jack for a few moments, telling him how many pills to take at what specific times, and to call if he needed any refills. He hid a grin when he glanced at one of the bottles. ‘Tylenol 3’s hmm? My fave,’ he thought.
Angel caught the stilted smile that almost appeared on Jack’s face. He frowned darkly as it occurred to him that he might need to carefully monitor Jack’s intake of the pills. It bothered him to think that Jack might abuse himself, as if what Bobby had been doing was not enough in some way.
He gently grabbed the bag from the pharmacist’s hands and thanked him for his time. He pulled an unresisting Jack from the store. This time, Jack didn’t object when Angel held the door open, he merely rolled his eyes. Once they were both in the car, Angel sat a moment before putting the key in the ignition. Jack raised an eyebrow carefully; his face was still quite swollen and tender.
“Angel?” he asked slowly.
Angel shook his head a second later, blinking quickly as he looked over at Jack.
“We going’?” Jack asked.
“Yeah I gotta pick up a couple of things. We’ll stop by your apartment and pick up some of your stuff before we head back,” Angel said.
Jack flushed lightly. “I thought I might just stay at the apartment. Wait for Bobby maybe.”
Angel shook his head. “No. You’re coming back to the house with me. We’ll get some of your clothes and shit. That’s it.”
Jack glared out the window for a full minute before turning back to Angel, his eyes flashing with anger.
“I appreciate your concern Angel. I’m fine, and I’ve decided to stay at the apartment,” he said quietly.
Angel gave him a grim smile. “You try that, and I’ll carry you back to the house over my shoulder.”
Jack winced as a sudden flash of memory flooded him. Bobby insisting on carrying him over the threshold of the doorway. Jack yelling to be let down, the heated kisses until Evelyn had interrupted them.
He closed his eyes tightly. “Fine” he said, his lips thinned in annoyance. Angel studied his face for a second, all the while wondering exactly how far he’d be able to wing it when it came to dealing with Jack and Bobby.
*****************************
Angel took the silence between them to think over how to handle the situation. Angel had always prided himself on his keen observation skills. He knew all too well that poor judgments, snap decisions and a lack of observing what the problem was could cost you your life.
Now he watched Jack nervously tapping his good arm against his leg as the elevator slowly moved higher. Jack pulled his keys from his coat pocket, jingling them lightly as the elevator door opened. Angel watched Jack’s carefully blank face with a practiced eye. He could see the signs of nervousness flowing through Jack’s entire body.
Jack opened the door to his apartment, still silent, his footsteps unsure and discomfort clear on his face. “Uh, don’t mind the mess huh?” he said, a false note of cheerfulness in his voice.
Angel surveyed the room in one quick glance. The apartment looked like it had been torn apart. Books and magazines torn into strips that littered the floor. The kitchen table overturned, one of the couch cushions with its stuffing ripped out. There were dishes smashed on the floor, porcelain shards everywhere. Jack made an odd sound when he saw that most of the pictures on the walls had been pulled down and smashed, the glass shards sticking up obscenely from the frames.
Angel was finding it difficult to breathe as he took in the evidence of Bobby’s wrath. He wanted to scream, scream until he was sure that Bobby could hear it. He resumed watching Jack’s face. He felt painfully unsure of what to say, if anything at all. Jack moved from room to room, taking in the damage. The bathroom was just as bad as the living room. Bottles smashed, holes punched in the walls along the hallway. Angel followed behind Jack as he headed into the bedroom. He was about to finally say something when he saw exactly why Jack had stopped dead in his tracks.
The bedroom was messy, clothes everywhere and more books tossed around, but the one thing that cut Jack to the core was what lay on the bed. Angel stepped out from behind Jack, any words he had been about to say, dried up and useless. He took one look at the bed and swore softly.
On the bed, was Jack’s guitar. Or rather what was left of it. The guitar had been broken into several pieces, its strings snapped. Jack let out a small moan of distress as he dropped to his knees, heedless of the pain that shot up his left leg. He covered his face with one hand, soft keening sounds falling from his mouth.
Angel closed his eyes. The devastation on Jack’s face was too much to take. He walked over to Jack and crouched beside him. He grabbed Jack and pulled him into a tight hug. Jack cried quietly, his sobs so pain filled that Angel felt sick. He rubbed Jack’s back carefully, mindful of any possible bruises that might have been there.
“It’s ok Jack. It’s ok, don’t cry Jackie. It’ll be alright man,” Angel muttered, swallowing over the sour lump in his throat. Jack shuddered then, his shoulders twitching as he attempted to slow his tears.
“Why?” he croaked softly into Angel’s chest, still sniffling. Angel sighed deeply.
“I don’t know, I wish I knew Jackie,” Angel said.
“The one thing that matters the most besides him and he had to destroy it,” Jack whimpered.
“C’mon Jack; let’s get some of your stuff together for now. We’ll come back another day, ok?” Angel said.
Jack nodded brokenly as he stood up, his breath hitching at the flare of pain in his leg. He limped over to the closet and pulled down one of the duffel bags. He let it fall to the ground, unable to go too close to the bed. Angel watched his slow movements before gently grasping Jack’s elbow and guiding him over to the hallway.
“Just tell me what you want me to pack. I’ll do it,” he said quietly. Jack mouthed ‘ok’ and leaned heavily on the doorframe. He pointed to particular clothes on the floor; Angel scooped them up and piled them beside the bag. Angel folded the clothes neatly and placed them in the bag. Then he turned back to Jack.
“There anything else?” he asked.
Jack shook his head silently. Angel nodded once. He pulled an unresisting Jack towards the bathroom and told him to grab his toothbrush and hair stuff. Jack handed each item to Angel as though he were comatose. Angel supposed the shock of seeing the apartment in such a state had thrown Jack for a loop. He led him back downstairs, pausing only long enough to lock the door again and bring Jack back to the car.
Jack got into the car and promptly began to fall asleep in the passenger seat. Angel smiled as he watched Jack sleep out of the corner of his eye. He drove around town a bit, taking a little longer than strictly necessary to do his errands. The last thing he wanted to do was get back home before Evelyn was done speaking with Bobby.
******************************
Angel pulled into the driveway right as Evelyn drove up behind him. Angel gave her car a quick scan, double checking for any sign of Bobby. He frowned as he saw how exhausted Evelyn looked. He got out of his car, careful not to let the door slam and wake up Jack.
“Hey Ma” he said, his eyes roving back and forth as he checked the street. Evelyn gave him a weary smile. She rubbed one of her temples as though her head hurt.
“He’s not here Angel. Don’t worry; he’s not going to pop up out of anywhere.”
Angel snorted. “Never hurts to pay attention.”
She looped arms with him as they walked back over to Angel’s car. Evelyn peered into the window and sighed.
“How did it go?” she asked.
Angel held up the pharmacy bag. “Got the meds. We stopped at his place.”
Evelyn locked eyes with Angel. “And…?” she said.
Angel looked down at the ground. He hesitated for a minute before shaking his head sadly.
“Bobby tore the place up pretty bad. He totaled it, I guess last night ‘fore he got here. I grabbed some of Jack’s stuff for now. I wasn’t sure if he’d come back while we were there.”
Evelyn leaned against the car door and rubbed her temples again. “Why do I get the disturbing feeling that you’re not telling me everything?” she asked resignedly.
Angel glanced over at Jack’s sleeping face. ‘He looks so young’ he thought wistfully.
“Bobby…he smashed Jack’s guitar. Into several pieces,” Angel muttered, his eyes dark and sad.
Evelyn gave a horrified gasp, one hand to her mouth in an instant. “No” she breathed.
“Is he ok?” she asked.
Angel nodded. “Yeah, he kinda went into shock I guess. Had to be led around. He fell asleep in the car soon after we left.”
“Oh my…I never thought…I never even imagined that Bobby would do something like that,” she said softly. Angel leaned against the car beside Evelyn and shrugged.
“I don’t think he planned it, Ma. More like couldn’t stop once he started” he said.
Evelyn looked inside the car again. Jack was whimpering in his sleep, his lips moving slowly. She opened the car door and began to reach for him. Jack’s eyes shot open the second he felt a hand on his shoulder. Evelyn smiled at him, her gentle smile that always made Jack feel calm and relaxed when he saw it.
He winced as pain shot through his leg when he moved forward. “Inside now Jack. It’s still far too cold out today” she said as he shuffled towards her.
Jack leaned heavily on Angel as they walked towards the door. He yawned then as the strain of the day caught up with him. Evelyn saw him begin to yawn a second time.
“No you don’t Jackie. No sleep yet. We’ll get some lunch into you, then your medication, and then you can sleep,” she scolded lightly.
Jack gave her a small grin and nodded his head at her. “You got it.”
Angel helped Jack into the nearest kitchen chair, sitting down with a worn out sigh on a chair of his own. Evelyn stayed busy by preparing far too much food for the three of them. Jack picked at his food with great disinterest, taking only the smallest bites of his sandwich. Evelyn and Angel exchanged several worried glances at the way Jack’s face would cloud over every few moments, his eyes blank with memory.
They helped Jack upstairs and into his room. Evelyn shooed Angel out of the room as she tucked Jack in. She grabbed another blanket from the hallway and draped it over the bed.
“Mom, I’m ok really…no more blankets,” Jack pleaded, squirming under the weight of all the blankets on his bed. He felt like there was a lead weight on his chest.
“I just worry about how cold it gets in here Jackie. I don’t want you getting sick on top of everything else,” she said as she handed him a glass of water to take with his pills.
Jack downed the water in seconds, his stomach rumbling in protest over the lack of food. Evelyn watched him far too closely for his liking as he relaxed back against the pillows. She stroked one hand through his hair, calming him immensely. When she thought that he was asleep, she made to get up.
Halfway to the door, she heard a sleepy whisper.
“Mom, where’s Bobby gone?”
She turned around, a somewhat fake smile on her face. “I spoke with him like I said I would, and then we took a drive. He asked me to drop him off downtown.”
Jack nodded as he yawned, his eyes half closed. “Oh”
Evelyn started to close the door behind her when she heard Jack’s faint whisper.
“If he comes back tonight, tell him I understand.”
She closed her eyes. Jack’s empathy knew no bounds. “I will.”
“Thanks.”
Evelyn gently pulled the door shut. She walked into the bathroom and splashed some cold water on her face. She bit her lip fiercely as the urge to cry hit her again. Jack would go on forgiving Bobby, no matter what he did to him. The very thought frightened her more than the knowledge of what Bobby was capable of doing.
******************************
Jerry struggled in vain not to laugh at Bobby as he staggered up the stairs to his apartment. He was afraid that if he started laughing, he wouldn’t be able to stop, that his laughter would pass from mere mirth to hysterical. He sighed softly as Bobby tripped over yet another stair, listening to him make small grumbling sounds under his breath as he fell each time. Bobby had insisted on taking the stairs, despite the fact that he was so drunk, he couldn’t stand up unassisted.
After much swearing and fumbling, they made it to the fifth floor, much to Jerry’s relief. He wrestled the keys from Bobby with little more than a dirty look. Bobby swayed in the hallway, blissfully ignorant of the disgust in Jerry’s eyes. He pushed the door open and stepped in, tugging Bobby behind him. He stumbled to a halt, his eyes wide with shock as he took in the disarray of the apartment.
The door banged shut, the sound reverberating around the room. Jerry winced as he looked around the living room, his breathing heavy with fear. He swirled around and grabbed Bobby’s coat.
“What the hell did you do?” he asked, a heavy frown on his face.
Bobby blinked slowly. “Do?” he repeated. “To Jackie y’mean?”
Jerry shook him slightly. “No, you moron! Look around you! Look at the apartment!”
Bobby dragged his eyes around the room, the glazed look on his face fading fast as he took in the destruction before him. He grimaced when he saw the shards of glass sticking up from the pictures, the shelving unit that Jerry and Angel had struggled to put together lying sideways on the ground, the paper ripped up, the cushions gutted. He took one wobbly step back and blinked rapidly.
“What-what the fuck.” he stuttered.
Jerry let go of his coat with an angry snort. “Did some redecorating before leaving to find Jack, hmm?”
Bobby started to shake his head ‘no’. “I...I couldn’t have.”
Jerry rolled his eyes. “Course not. Not you, Bobby Mercer. Not the ‘Michigan Mauler’. He’d never do such a thing,” he snapped, waving his fingers in quotes.
“Are you even in your own head when you do this shit or what?”
Bobby stepped forward, his hands reaching out blindly as he started to walk around the apartment. He moved from room to room, his stomach rebelling angrily as he saw the sheer amount of damage he had inflicted. He closed his eyes in shame as he passed the bathroom. He hesitated for just a moment before entering the bedroom.
“Please, please...” he muttered, his pleas falling from numb lips.
Jerry stood at his side, his hands tightening reflexively as he moved into the room. He saw more of the same mess, books, and clothing. Bobby stepped forward, one hand shakily coming up to his mouth as his eyes landed on the bed. He let out a low moan, his hand clenched tightly over his lips. Jerry leaned forward and felt the breath leave his lungs as he saw the bed for himself.
Upon seeing the destroyed guitar, Bobby felt the ground under him tilt dangerously. He swayed closer to the wall, a wave of hot panic swept over him. He shut his eyes tight as the memories of seeing Jack play swamped him. He remembered the night that he had come home late to find Jack strumming his guitar, his fingers barely moving, his eyes half open as he fought to stay awake, if only to see Bobby for a moment before falling asleep.
“Oh my god,” Jerry said in a horrified whisper.
Bobby swallowed a sob as he clawed at the wall, struggling violently to stay upright. He took several weak steps to the bed, only to collapse beside it. He couldn’t take his eyes off the mangled guitar.
“I...oh god...I didn’t know...I didn’t mean to...” he trailed off helplessly, his hands moving restlessly against the bedspread. Jerry walked carefully, his eyes still wide, his anger growing stronger.
“You don’t even fuckin’ know what this is gonna do to Jack,” he said quietly.
Jerry gave a harsh laugh. “You know, I thought that it couldn’t get much worse. But I was fuckin’ wrong wasn’t I? You not only beat the shit out of Jack, beat him to the point of death, you had to go and destroy the home you share together. And to top it off, just to make your point, you demolish the most precious thing that ever mattered to Jack!”
Bobby dropped his aching head in his hands and wept softly, so softly Jerry could barely hear it. He snorted. ‘Oh yes, he’s going to hear all I got to say’ he thought with a dark grin.
“I didn’t know...I wasn’t thinking...” Bobby babbled.
“Shut up! Shut your fuckin’ mouth!” Jerry shouted, spinning around to face Bobby again.
“You aren’t giving me any excuses! You expect me to believe you? The things you did yesterday are almost unbearable. You disgust me!” he spat furiously.
Bobby was up on his feet in a mere second. He grabbed Jerry and pushed him into the wall, his chest heaving with anger and most of all, guilt.
“What? You gonna hit me too? Give me some of what Jack got? You get off on it huh?” Jerry taunted, his blood rushing in his ears. He could see the fury in Bobby’s eyes but he was unable to stop talking.
“You go right ahead, beat the shit outta me right here, right fuckin’ now, you sad excuse for a human. Just so you know though, I’m not Jack. I’ll fight you back,” he said, his upper lip still pulled up in a snarl.
Bobby pulled his fist back ready to smash it into Jerry’s face. He felt a sharp pain in his head right at the moment he was about to let go of his control. ‘Back away’ his mind shouted frantically. He dropped Jerry and backed up, his breathing erratic.
“God,” he gasped. He bent in half, his face white with pain, his eyes leaking even as he screamed then, a deep almost howl of agony. Jerry watched him for a moment, afraid to move too quickly. He pushed aside any guilty feelings about the words he’d said.
“I, I can’t stop it...I...blink and, and it’s like it’s not me anymore,” Bobby murmured brokenly.
“I snap and it’s gone. He’ll never love me now!” he moaned.
Jerry grabbed Bobby by the shoulders roughly. “Listen to me!” he snapped.
“Are you listening?” he asked impatiently. Bobby nodded once, his eyes swollen and red.
“Jack loves you, god only knows why he forgives you, but he’ll never stop loving you. And this-..” he gestured to what was left of the guitar, “this he’ll forgive. That’s the kind of person he is Bobby. More than you deserve, but he’ll understand. He may be furious at first, rightfully so, and you had better not expect any miracles. But Jack will go on loving you no matter how much it hurts.”
“What do I do now?” Bobby asked quietly.
Jerry sighed and rubbed his forehead. His head throbbed with the stress of the situation.
“You gotta start somewhere Bobby. Start small. Start with a counselor.”
Bobby glared at Jerry and opened his mouth to speak. Jerry gave him a warning glance.
“Ma can help in some ways, but you need a professional. Work through your issues, man, you just can’t keep doing this shit. Make peace with yourself. Show Jack that when you say it won’t happen anymore, that it really won’t. Show him you love him,” Jerry said.
Bobby nodded once more, his face so sad that Jerry felt a twinge of pity for him.
“I know you didn’t want to hurt him but you have got to own up for what you’re done,” Jerry added. He pulled Bobby to him in a hug. He thought of Evelyn at that moment.
‘Am I doing this right Ma?’ he mumbled desolately.
Bobby made small snuffling sounds as he wiped his face with his hands. Jerry patted him once on the back, then let him go. Bobby stared at the floor, unable to meet Jerry’s probing eyes.
Jerry glanced at his watch. “I gotta run man. I was supposed to pick up Camille 15 minutes ago.”
Bobby shook his head. “Get outta here then,” he said with a broken smile.
Jerry started to leave then hesitated. “You gonna be all right Bobby?”
Bobby waved his hand at him. “Go on, I won’t do anything stupid.”
Jerry chuckled. “Stupid in whose opinion?” He laughed then as he dodged a book that came flying towards him. He closed the door behind him, his mind still racing as he ran down the stairs.
*******************************
I apologize that this chapter is shorter than the others. I've got alot of other stories running wild on me and I'm attempting to rein them in. I thought I should post this even if it is shorter if only because I don't want it to fall by the wayside.
Author: veiledndarkness
Rating: Hard R
Summary: Sometimes the one person you trust the most can turn out to be the worst person for you.
Warnings:
This is by far the most alternate universe story I've ever started. Evelyn is alive in this one but all is not well. Bobby is extremely, extremely different in this story. He is similar in many ways to his character in Four Brothers, but this is a different side of Bobby, one that isn't fully explored in the movie. This is one way Bobby might have been if they had developed his character more and made him less able to deal with problems.
******************************
Jack stared out the window of the car, wishing that he was a fly on the ceiling in the house right then. He sighed despondently as Angel pulled into the parking lot of the local pharmacy. He turned and gave Angel a pleading look.
“Can’t I just wait in the car?” he asked.
Angel shook his head. “Sorry Jackie, you gotta come with me. ‘Sides, the pharmacist will wanna talk to you.”
Jack sat back heavily in his seat, the beginnings of a pout on his face. Angel laughed under his breath. “Sulk all ya want, you’re still coming with.”
With an annoyed sigh, Jack got out of the car, his arm cradled protectively against his chest. He winced as he banged it off the store door. Angel was right behind him then, grabbing the door.
“When are you gonna learn that sometimes you need help Jack?” Angel asked as Jack walked past him. Jack stiffened slightly. He turned and gave Angel a dirty look.
“I don’t need your help to open a door Angel!” he snapped.
“With a busted arm you do, so shut your mouth brat,” Angel chided affectionately.
“Nothing you can say that’s gonna stop me from looking after you,” he added a moment later.
Jack walked down the aisles; shoulders slumped over as they made their way to the counter. Angel ignored Jack’s behavior. He understood why Jack was acting childish; it was a way to guard himself. Act bratty and the adults around you will leave you alone.
He smiled as he recalled how much of a snarky brat Jack could be when he was scared or nervous. The smile fell as he also recalled that the brat side of Jack was flimsy at best and that he could be hurt so easily by other’s words, let alone their fists.
They stopped at the counter and waited for one of the pharmacists to notice them. After a moment or so of waiting, one of the pharmacists came over to get the prescriptions. Jack quickly grew bored of the conversation and went to sit on one of the uncomfortable chairs off to the side. He felt overly self-conscious of the sling around his arm and the splint on his nose. He was all too aware of how badly his face was bruised.
Jack practiced his scowl on the other curious customers who stared just a little too long at him. He smiled triumphantly when an old man who had been about to ask what happened, changed his mind at the nasty look Jack gave him.
‘Bobby would have been proud’, he thought with a grin.
Bobby.
Like a switch that been flipped, his smile vanished. He began to gnaw on his lower lip as he worried about what Evelyn must have been saying to him. He was afraid that in her efforts to help him, that things would only get worse. Jack feared exactly what it would take to push Bobby one step too far. He glanced down at his arm again. ‘Not much’, he thought sadly.
Jack sighed then. Angel rounded the corner and nodded at him. He dragged himself up and out of the chair, favoring his injured leg. The pharmacist spoke with Jack for a few moments, telling him how many pills to take at what specific times, and to call if he needed any refills. He hid a grin when he glanced at one of the bottles. ‘Tylenol 3’s hmm? My fave,’ he thought.
Angel caught the stilted smile that almost appeared on Jack’s face. He frowned darkly as it occurred to him that he might need to carefully monitor Jack’s intake of the pills. It bothered him to think that Jack might abuse himself, as if what Bobby had been doing was not enough in some way.
He gently grabbed the bag from the pharmacist’s hands and thanked him for his time. He pulled an unresisting Jack from the store. This time, Jack didn’t object when Angel held the door open, he merely rolled his eyes. Once they were both in the car, Angel sat a moment before putting the key in the ignition. Jack raised an eyebrow carefully; his face was still quite swollen and tender.
“Angel?” he asked slowly.
Angel shook his head a second later, blinking quickly as he looked over at Jack.
“We going’?” Jack asked.
“Yeah I gotta pick up a couple of things. We’ll stop by your apartment and pick up some of your stuff before we head back,” Angel said.
Jack flushed lightly. “I thought I might just stay at the apartment. Wait for Bobby maybe.”
Angel shook his head. “No. You’re coming back to the house with me. We’ll get some of your clothes and shit. That’s it.”
Jack glared out the window for a full minute before turning back to Angel, his eyes flashing with anger.
“I appreciate your concern Angel. I’m fine, and I’ve decided to stay at the apartment,” he said quietly.
Angel gave him a grim smile. “You try that, and I’ll carry you back to the house over my shoulder.”
Jack winced as a sudden flash of memory flooded him. Bobby insisting on carrying him over the threshold of the doorway. Jack yelling to be let down, the heated kisses until Evelyn had interrupted them.
He closed his eyes tightly. “Fine” he said, his lips thinned in annoyance. Angel studied his face for a second, all the while wondering exactly how far he’d be able to wing it when it came to dealing with Jack and Bobby.
*****************************
Angel took the silence between them to think over how to handle the situation. Angel had always prided himself on his keen observation skills. He knew all too well that poor judgments, snap decisions and a lack of observing what the problem was could cost you your life.
Now he watched Jack nervously tapping his good arm against his leg as the elevator slowly moved higher. Jack pulled his keys from his coat pocket, jingling them lightly as the elevator door opened. Angel watched Jack’s carefully blank face with a practiced eye. He could see the signs of nervousness flowing through Jack’s entire body.
Jack opened the door to his apartment, still silent, his footsteps unsure and discomfort clear on his face. “Uh, don’t mind the mess huh?” he said, a false note of cheerfulness in his voice.
Angel surveyed the room in one quick glance. The apartment looked like it had been torn apart. Books and magazines torn into strips that littered the floor. The kitchen table overturned, one of the couch cushions with its stuffing ripped out. There were dishes smashed on the floor, porcelain shards everywhere. Jack made an odd sound when he saw that most of the pictures on the walls had been pulled down and smashed, the glass shards sticking up obscenely from the frames.
Angel was finding it difficult to breathe as he took in the evidence of Bobby’s wrath. He wanted to scream, scream until he was sure that Bobby could hear it. He resumed watching Jack’s face. He felt painfully unsure of what to say, if anything at all. Jack moved from room to room, taking in the damage. The bathroom was just as bad as the living room. Bottles smashed, holes punched in the walls along the hallway. Angel followed behind Jack as he headed into the bedroom. He was about to finally say something when he saw exactly why Jack had stopped dead in his tracks.
The bedroom was messy, clothes everywhere and more books tossed around, but the one thing that cut Jack to the core was what lay on the bed. Angel stepped out from behind Jack, any words he had been about to say, dried up and useless. He took one look at the bed and swore softly.
On the bed, was Jack’s guitar. Or rather what was left of it. The guitar had been broken into several pieces, its strings snapped. Jack let out a small moan of distress as he dropped to his knees, heedless of the pain that shot up his left leg. He covered his face with one hand, soft keening sounds falling from his mouth.
Angel closed his eyes. The devastation on Jack’s face was too much to take. He walked over to Jack and crouched beside him. He grabbed Jack and pulled him into a tight hug. Jack cried quietly, his sobs so pain filled that Angel felt sick. He rubbed Jack’s back carefully, mindful of any possible bruises that might have been there.
“It’s ok Jack. It’s ok, don’t cry Jackie. It’ll be alright man,” Angel muttered, swallowing over the sour lump in his throat. Jack shuddered then, his shoulders twitching as he attempted to slow his tears.
“Why?” he croaked softly into Angel’s chest, still sniffling. Angel sighed deeply.
“I don’t know, I wish I knew Jackie,” Angel said.
“The one thing that matters the most besides him and he had to destroy it,” Jack whimpered.
“C’mon Jack; let’s get some of your stuff together for now. We’ll come back another day, ok?” Angel said.
Jack nodded brokenly as he stood up, his breath hitching at the flare of pain in his leg. He limped over to the closet and pulled down one of the duffel bags. He let it fall to the ground, unable to go too close to the bed. Angel watched his slow movements before gently grasping Jack’s elbow and guiding him over to the hallway.
“Just tell me what you want me to pack. I’ll do it,” he said quietly. Jack mouthed ‘ok’ and leaned heavily on the doorframe. He pointed to particular clothes on the floor; Angel scooped them up and piled them beside the bag. Angel folded the clothes neatly and placed them in the bag. Then he turned back to Jack.
“There anything else?” he asked.
Jack shook his head silently. Angel nodded once. He pulled an unresisting Jack towards the bathroom and told him to grab his toothbrush and hair stuff. Jack handed each item to Angel as though he were comatose. Angel supposed the shock of seeing the apartment in such a state had thrown Jack for a loop. He led him back downstairs, pausing only long enough to lock the door again and bring Jack back to the car.
Jack got into the car and promptly began to fall asleep in the passenger seat. Angel smiled as he watched Jack sleep out of the corner of his eye. He drove around town a bit, taking a little longer than strictly necessary to do his errands. The last thing he wanted to do was get back home before Evelyn was done speaking with Bobby.
******************************
Angel pulled into the driveway right as Evelyn drove up behind him. Angel gave her car a quick scan, double checking for any sign of Bobby. He frowned as he saw how exhausted Evelyn looked. He got out of his car, careful not to let the door slam and wake up Jack.
“Hey Ma” he said, his eyes roving back and forth as he checked the street. Evelyn gave him a weary smile. She rubbed one of her temples as though her head hurt.
“He’s not here Angel. Don’t worry; he’s not going to pop up out of anywhere.”
Angel snorted. “Never hurts to pay attention.”
She looped arms with him as they walked back over to Angel’s car. Evelyn peered into the window and sighed.
“How did it go?” she asked.
Angel held up the pharmacy bag. “Got the meds. We stopped at his place.”
Evelyn locked eyes with Angel. “And…?” she said.
Angel looked down at the ground. He hesitated for a minute before shaking his head sadly.
“Bobby tore the place up pretty bad. He totaled it, I guess last night ‘fore he got here. I grabbed some of Jack’s stuff for now. I wasn’t sure if he’d come back while we were there.”
Evelyn leaned against the car door and rubbed her temples again. “Why do I get the disturbing feeling that you’re not telling me everything?” she asked resignedly.
Angel glanced over at Jack’s sleeping face. ‘He looks so young’ he thought wistfully.
“Bobby…he smashed Jack’s guitar. Into several pieces,” Angel muttered, his eyes dark and sad.
Evelyn gave a horrified gasp, one hand to her mouth in an instant. “No” she breathed.
“Is he ok?” she asked.
Angel nodded. “Yeah, he kinda went into shock I guess. Had to be led around. He fell asleep in the car soon after we left.”
“Oh my…I never thought…I never even imagined that Bobby would do something like that,” she said softly. Angel leaned against the car beside Evelyn and shrugged.
“I don’t think he planned it, Ma. More like couldn’t stop once he started” he said.
Evelyn looked inside the car again. Jack was whimpering in his sleep, his lips moving slowly. She opened the car door and began to reach for him. Jack’s eyes shot open the second he felt a hand on his shoulder. Evelyn smiled at him, her gentle smile that always made Jack feel calm and relaxed when he saw it.
He winced as pain shot through his leg when he moved forward. “Inside now Jack. It’s still far too cold out today” she said as he shuffled towards her.
Jack leaned heavily on Angel as they walked towards the door. He yawned then as the strain of the day caught up with him. Evelyn saw him begin to yawn a second time.
“No you don’t Jackie. No sleep yet. We’ll get some lunch into you, then your medication, and then you can sleep,” she scolded lightly.
Jack gave her a small grin and nodded his head at her. “You got it.”
Angel helped Jack into the nearest kitchen chair, sitting down with a worn out sigh on a chair of his own. Evelyn stayed busy by preparing far too much food for the three of them. Jack picked at his food with great disinterest, taking only the smallest bites of his sandwich. Evelyn and Angel exchanged several worried glances at the way Jack’s face would cloud over every few moments, his eyes blank with memory.
They helped Jack upstairs and into his room. Evelyn shooed Angel out of the room as she tucked Jack in. She grabbed another blanket from the hallway and draped it over the bed.
“Mom, I’m ok really…no more blankets,” Jack pleaded, squirming under the weight of all the blankets on his bed. He felt like there was a lead weight on his chest.
“I just worry about how cold it gets in here Jackie. I don’t want you getting sick on top of everything else,” she said as she handed him a glass of water to take with his pills.
Jack downed the water in seconds, his stomach rumbling in protest over the lack of food. Evelyn watched him far too closely for his liking as he relaxed back against the pillows. She stroked one hand through his hair, calming him immensely. When she thought that he was asleep, she made to get up.
Halfway to the door, she heard a sleepy whisper.
“Mom, where’s Bobby gone?”
She turned around, a somewhat fake smile on her face. “I spoke with him like I said I would, and then we took a drive. He asked me to drop him off downtown.”
Jack nodded as he yawned, his eyes half closed. “Oh”
Evelyn started to close the door behind her when she heard Jack’s faint whisper.
“If he comes back tonight, tell him I understand.”
She closed her eyes. Jack’s empathy knew no bounds. “I will.”
“Thanks.”
Evelyn gently pulled the door shut. She walked into the bathroom and splashed some cold water on her face. She bit her lip fiercely as the urge to cry hit her again. Jack would go on forgiving Bobby, no matter what he did to him. The very thought frightened her more than the knowledge of what Bobby was capable of doing.
******************************
Jerry struggled in vain not to laugh at Bobby as he staggered up the stairs to his apartment. He was afraid that if he started laughing, he wouldn’t be able to stop, that his laughter would pass from mere mirth to hysterical. He sighed softly as Bobby tripped over yet another stair, listening to him make small grumbling sounds under his breath as he fell each time. Bobby had insisted on taking the stairs, despite the fact that he was so drunk, he couldn’t stand up unassisted.
After much swearing and fumbling, they made it to the fifth floor, much to Jerry’s relief. He wrestled the keys from Bobby with little more than a dirty look. Bobby swayed in the hallway, blissfully ignorant of the disgust in Jerry’s eyes. He pushed the door open and stepped in, tugging Bobby behind him. He stumbled to a halt, his eyes wide with shock as he took in the disarray of the apartment.
The door banged shut, the sound reverberating around the room. Jerry winced as he looked around the living room, his breathing heavy with fear. He swirled around and grabbed Bobby’s coat.
“What the hell did you do?” he asked, a heavy frown on his face.
Bobby blinked slowly. “Do?” he repeated. “To Jackie y’mean?”
Jerry shook him slightly. “No, you moron! Look around you! Look at the apartment!”
Bobby dragged his eyes around the room, the glazed look on his face fading fast as he took in the destruction before him. He grimaced when he saw the shards of glass sticking up from the pictures, the shelving unit that Jerry and Angel had struggled to put together lying sideways on the ground, the paper ripped up, the cushions gutted. He took one wobbly step back and blinked rapidly.
“What-what the fuck.” he stuttered.
Jerry let go of his coat with an angry snort. “Did some redecorating before leaving to find Jack, hmm?”
Bobby started to shake his head ‘no’. “I...I couldn’t have.”
Jerry rolled his eyes. “Course not. Not you, Bobby Mercer. Not the ‘Michigan Mauler’. He’d never do such a thing,” he snapped, waving his fingers in quotes.
“Are you even in your own head when you do this shit or what?”
Bobby stepped forward, his hands reaching out blindly as he started to walk around the apartment. He moved from room to room, his stomach rebelling angrily as he saw the sheer amount of damage he had inflicted. He closed his eyes in shame as he passed the bathroom. He hesitated for just a moment before entering the bedroom.
“Please, please...” he muttered, his pleas falling from numb lips.
Jerry stood at his side, his hands tightening reflexively as he moved into the room. He saw more of the same mess, books, and clothing. Bobby stepped forward, one hand shakily coming up to his mouth as his eyes landed on the bed. He let out a low moan, his hand clenched tightly over his lips. Jerry leaned forward and felt the breath leave his lungs as he saw the bed for himself.
Upon seeing the destroyed guitar, Bobby felt the ground under him tilt dangerously. He swayed closer to the wall, a wave of hot panic swept over him. He shut his eyes tight as the memories of seeing Jack play swamped him. He remembered the night that he had come home late to find Jack strumming his guitar, his fingers barely moving, his eyes half open as he fought to stay awake, if only to see Bobby for a moment before falling asleep.
“Oh my god,” Jerry said in a horrified whisper.
Bobby swallowed a sob as he clawed at the wall, struggling violently to stay upright. He took several weak steps to the bed, only to collapse beside it. He couldn’t take his eyes off the mangled guitar.
“I...oh god...I didn’t know...I didn’t mean to...” he trailed off helplessly, his hands moving restlessly against the bedspread. Jerry walked carefully, his eyes still wide, his anger growing stronger.
“You don’t even fuckin’ know what this is gonna do to Jack,” he said quietly.
Jerry gave a harsh laugh. “You know, I thought that it couldn’t get much worse. But I was fuckin’ wrong wasn’t I? You not only beat the shit out of Jack, beat him to the point of death, you had to go and destroy the home you share together. And to top it off, just to make your point, you demolish the most precious thing that ever mattered to Jack!”
Bobby dropped his aching head in his hands and wept softly, so softly Jerry could barely hear it. He snorted. ‘Oh yes, he’s going to hear all I got to say’ he thought with a dark grin.
“I didn’t know...I wasn’t thinking...” Bobby babbled.
“Shut up! Shut your fuckin’ mouth!” Jerry shouted, spinning around to face Bobby again.
“You aren’t giving me any excuses! You expect me to believe you? The things you did yesterday are almost unbearable. You disgust me!” he spat furiously.
Bobby was up on his feet in a mere second. He grabbed Jerry and pushed him into the wall, his chest heaving with anger and most of all, guilt.
“What? You gonna hit me too? Give me some of what Jack got? You get off on it huh?” Jerry taunted, his blood rushing in his ears. He could see the fury in Bobby’s eyes but he was unable to stop talking.
“You go right ahead, beat the shit outta me right here, right fuckin’ now, you sad excuse for a human. Just so you know though, I’m not Jack. I’ll fight you back,” he said, his upper lip still pulled up in a snarl.
Bobby pulled his fist back ready to smash it into Jerry’s face. He felt a sharp pain in his head right at the moment he was about to let go of his control. ‘Back away’ his mind shouted frantically. He dropped Jerry and backed up, his breathing erratic.
“God,” he gasped. He bent in half, his face white with pain, his eyes leaking even as he screamed then, a deep almost howl of agony. Jerry watched him for a moment, afraid to move too quickly. He pushed aside any guilty feelings about the words he’d said.
“I, I can’t stop it...I...blink and, and it’s like it’s not me anymore,” Bobby murmured brokenly.
“I snap and it’s gone. He’ll never love me now!” he moaned.
Jerry grabbed Bobby by the shoulders roughly. “Listen to me!” he snapped.
“Are you listening?” he asked impatiently. Bobby nodded once, his eyes swollen and red.
“Jack loves you, god only knows why he forgives you, but he’ll never stop loving you. And this-..” he gestured to what was left of the guitar, “this he’ll forgive. That’s the kind of person he is Bobby. More than you deserve, but he’ll understand. He may be furious at first, rightfully so, and you had better not expect any miracles. But Jack will go on loving you no matter how much it hurts.”
“What do I do now?” Bobby asked quietly.
Jerry sighed and rubbed his forehead. His head throbbed with the stress of the situation.
“You gotta start somewhere Bobby. Start small. Start with a counselor.”
Bobby glared at Jerry and opened his mouth to speak. Jerry gave him a warning glance.
“Ma can help in some ways, but you need a professional. Work through your issues, man, you just can’t keep doing this shit. Make peace with yourself. Show Jack that when you say it won’t happen anymore, that it really won’t. Show him you love him,” Jerry said.
Bobby nodded once more, his face so sad that Jerry felt a twinge of pity for him.
“I know you didn’t want to hurt him but you have got to own up for what you’re done,” Jerry added. He pulled Bobby to him in a hug. He thought of Evelyn at that moment.
‘Am I doing this right Ma?’ he mumbled desolately.
Bobby made small snuffling sounds as he wiped his face with his hands. Jerry patted him once on the back, then let him go. Bobby stared at the floor, unable to meet Jerry’s probing eyes.
Jerry glanced at his watch. “I gotta run man. I was supposed to pick up Camille 15 minutes ago.”
Bobby shook his head. “Get outta here then,” he said with a broken smile.
Jerry started to leave then hesitated. “You gonna be all right Bobby?”
Bobby waved his hand at him. “Go on, I won’t do anything stupid.”
Jerry chuckled. “Stupid in whose opinion?” He laughed then as he dodged a book that came flying towards him. He closed the door behind him, his mind still racing as he ran down the stairs.
*******************************
I apologize that this chapter is shorter than the others. I've got alot of other stories running wild on me and I'm attempting to rein them in. I thought I should post this even if it is shorter if only because I don't want it to fall by the wayside.