Comments | bloodytearslife: July Jones, Chapter 3

bloodytearslife

July Jones, Chapter 3

Jun 22, 2006 14:35

Yup, yup, another chapter. Thanks to those few who are reading. :)

Author: BloodyTearsOfLife
Title: July Jones
Rating: PG-13/R
Disclaimer: All characters from The Fast and the Furious belong to Universal Studios, yada, yada, yada. I only own the ones you don’t know. And no profit is made of this, this is just for mine and hopefully your ( Read more... )

july jones, tfatf fanfic

Comments 6

(The comment has been removed)

bloodytearslife June 23 2006, 17:59:02 UTC

I wanted it to seem like nothing had been touched. Yeah, it might be a little weird but I think it hits that much more.

And yeah, there is that split of wanting to call and not wanting to.

I'm so happy that you like this. *hugs*

ozma914 June 23 2006, 20:55:01 UTC

I wasn't going to comment because I'm not familiar with this universe, but just to let you know, I *am* reading, and enjoying. I feel sorry for July, but more sorry for her second set of Real parents -- the ones who raised her for ten years. They'd be crazy with worry at this point. Hopefully the character's going to see that they're just as real as her original parents and make up with them. (I have a little experience in the adoption area myself.) Anyway, it's pretty good for a first effort. the story seems to flow a bit slowly, but maybe that's because my only real memory of the first movie is everything going very FAST. :-)

bloodytearslife June 23 2006, 22:25:38 UTC

Well, I thank you for commenting anyways. I have to admit that this story doesn't go too much into the adoption thing. I may add more to it. I wrote this like maybe 2 years ago? Not sure on the date, so you may be right in saying that it's moving kind of slow. It will pick up though. I'm just laying ground work down because I hate to introduce an OC without anything to hold them up.

ozma914 June 23 2006, 23:28:09 UTC

I struggled with that quite a bit with my OC's Kara and Richard, when I started "Where do we go from here". Not only were they OC, but also Mary Sue's, so I had to be very careful. I ended up opting for the less is more approach, and removing a large block of establishing material that I felt was slowing down the opening of the story. In my case that worked, since the relationship between Kara, her father, and her friend were the only really important parts of their back story.

opalenergy June 25 2006, 19:23:32 UTC

This was good too, and I'm actually glad she hadn't called Mary & Sam. I would too be so pissed beyond the telling if I found out the folks I had called my parents had lied to me.

bloodytearslife June 25 2006, 22:33:04 UTC

Thanks Opal. :) I didn't feel it was time to call them yet. There's still a lot of anger. Thanks for reading and reviewing!