Room 312 - Monday late afternoon/evening

[blondecanary]

Someone has a package from Amazon.com. Someone's left a message for a fellow recipient to pick up her books!

Someone is now paging through Amber Tears and blinking a lot.

[ooc: for thatsamilkshake but open for anyone else too]

Comments

[thatsamilkshake]

Baseball cap? Check. Black turtleneck? Check. Half-assed excuse for why she was going to be hiding a book under her shirt if anyone so much as looked at her on her way back to her room? Check. Extreme likelihood that she'd forget even the half-assed excuse in that situation, and just flail her arms around, drop the book in the hall, and run away to hide in her closet under a pile of scarves? Check.

Right. Knocking on the door.

[blondecanary]

Dinah opened the door a sliver, then pulled it open, muttering, "Come in come in come in they're heeeeere!"

[thatsamilkshake]

"SHHH SOMEONE MIGHT HEAAAAR YOU!" Only squirrels and dogs, on the other hand, would hear Francine.

[blondecanary]

"Not if you get in here already!" Dinah reached out to yank/usher/panic-flail Francine into the room, slammed the door shut when she was in, then dropped to her knees to pull the opened Amazon box out from underneath her bed.

"See? See?" She handed over one bright, cheerful, reassuring book, and then looked at her own copy. "I was kind of... anxious about reading it. But. It looks okay?"

[thatsamilkshake]

Francine held it as if the ink from the title might rub off on her fingers and MARK HER FOREVER. "Well... at least the cover's not, you know. No one's naked."

[blondecanary]

"Yes!" Dinah instantly agreed. "Yes, um. That's good." She stared at it a moment, then steeled herself, opening it up to a random page.

"Sex is not like riding a bike. Sure the same old balancing act that you learned as a kid still works just fine years later when all you have to do is pedal to the store and back. But when it comes to sex, it's a whole new balancing act every time you hop on for a ride." She paused. "Okay, not looking at my bike the same way ever again.

[thatsamilkshake]

"You have to worry about falling off?" She didn't wail it, exactly. But there was definitely aghastitude.

[blondecanary]

"That's just the intro!" Dinah gave her a totally dismayed look, then stared at the manual, and started paging to the Table of Contents. "Ohhh God I hope that's a metaphor, it kind of has to be, doesn't it? Wow." She blinked at the list of chapters, and said aloud, "Sexpectations, Sexual Compatibility, Secrets from Below the Belt, um.... Positions and Playtime?" She turned to the page and stared. "These people are upside-down."

[thatsamilkshake]

"What?" Francine peered over he shoulder, despite her desire to hide her head under .... something. Anything. Camille, maybe. "How??"

[blondecanary]

Dinah was still staring, and then tilted her head, holding out one arm in front of her, and muttering aloud, "So if I did a handstand, and the guy was strong enough to hold me, and... Okay. Okay, so, possible. Just really athletic." Blink, blink. "Wow. Um. I don't think I have the nerve for that, and the blood would all rush to my face and I don't need more of that, so no."

[thatsamilkshake]

Francine just stared. And stared. And STARED. "I'd get two black eyes!" she blurted, and then yanked her baseball cap down to cover her flaming face.

[blondecanary]

Dinah chortled, blushing Sunset Red (the same color as her nail polish), and dropped the book, hands going over her face as she giggled and giggled and giggled. "Ohhhhhhkay not gonna look at page 177 again until way way way way down the line...."

[thatsamilkshake]

"Maybe when I'm EIGHTY!" Francine paused, pushed the bill of her cap up again so she could breathe, then made a stricken face. "Oh, EWW. EWWWWWWW. IMAGES."

[blondecanary]

"What?" Dinah said, not getting it immediately.

And then she did. And took it somewhere even more horrifying.

"ALFRED is eighty! Omigod, Francine! EWWWWWW! EW EW EW!"

[thatsamilkshake]

"Well I wasn't picturing an eighty year old man!" Sigh. "EWWWWW! NOW I AM!"

[blondecanary]

Dinah made a face, and kicked at the book, which fell open to a different page. She blinked. "'Creating a Sensuous Feast'? Seriously?" She picked it up again, reading. "Hunh. Food is sexy?"