Abyss (R) (Smash) PART 11
Title: Abyss
Author: blackpoetcat
Rating: R
Character: Derek Wills
Disclaimer: NBC owns all, just playing drama with
Summary: Everyone knows he doesn't give a shit about anything but the show. So when Derek's life capsizes, will anyone give a shit about him?
( Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6, Part 7, Part 8, Part 9, Part 10)
The following weeks passed surprisingly easier and much faster than Derek had feared. As Kevin had told him, he adapted to the daily routine in a few days, despite his typically low patience. Of course the long and ever-varied conversations with his fellow inmate helped as much as the regular letters from Tom and the result of the lie detector test to balance his mind.
It was now official that he didn't pretend, but really had a total black-out, though they had to break and repeat the test after he got annoyed with the illogical questions necessary to check the correct technical function and started to bark out the answers, therefore falsifying the first results. This and the agreement between him, Bellamy and the guards to not accept any visitors from press were a great relief for Derek. To learn how much the media dragged him through the mud was bad enough.
As sorry as he was to lose someone who actually became a friend, he was truly happy for Kevin when he left prison for good, because he got away with the hoped-for probation sentence and 200 hours of community service. Though he needed to find a new job, he was confident he'd get one. Before this incident, he had worked as first barkeeper in a four-star hotel lounge, which explained to Derek his fine manners and education.
Well, of course none of the upper class hotels or bars would hire someone on probation or with a record at all, but there were plenty of establishments in town whose owners wouldn't bother, as long as they could get a professional cocktail mixer at good value, Kevin told Derek when he visited him two days after his release. And he not only promised to stay in contact, no matter how Derek's case turned out, but brought him a cheesecake his wife had baked for Derek out of gratitude for being her husband's friend during confinement.
Never before in his life had anyone baked a cake for him, not even his mother who didn't like any kind of housework at all, so Derek was genuinely moved by this gesture. Especially when he remembered his assumption about her leaving Kevin. Either his friend didn't tell her or she was gracious or good-humoured enough to overlook it.
Miles O'Shaugn was the only person with whom he shared the delicious cake, for he didn't get as close with any other inmate as with Kevin, but instead was on a first name basis with the officer.
***
Despite the Boston scandal, 'Bombshell' was on its way to great success, he learned from Tom. The show got standing ovations in every town in which they performed previews, and no less than good, but mostly excellent critical reviews. Contrary to Derek's apprehension, Karen grew stronger with each performance and now had the support of everyone. Levitt mentioned that Dominguez didn't change any major decision Derek ever made, neither in choreographic nor costumes or dance procedures, so at least his work hadn't been dropped like himself.
Also he told Derek that though the cast seemed generally more relaxed than under his direction, especially after the media hype about the crime scandal had diminished, it was still obvious that after every little mistake during rehearsals they were anxiously awaiting the usual outburst. Sometimes Tom couldn't help but snicker openly, given their faces when realization dawned after Dominguez' soft and polite standard remark "Ah, you can do better; try again, will you?"
In the first letters they exchanged, there was still an awkward tension between them, unsurprising considering the barrier they had built eleven years ago. But the longer and the more intensively they shared each other's lives, the more their writing eased up and after six weeks Derek felt as if he had been part of Tom's life forever. He was happy to follow Levitt's constantly growing relationship with Sam and -- though not without troublesome emotions by reading about her -- to learn that Ivy made good progress in rehab. Nevertheless, to Derek's relief, her therapist attested that her mental condition was still too fragile for her to attend his trial as a witness.
When he read about Julia's destroyed marriage, that she was getting a divorce because she was with child from Michael Swift, he buried his face in his hands and for the first time not only felt honestly sorry for her, but in some way partially responsible. Now he understood why she had been so distracted, even absent for quite some time, and he loathed himself for not caring. He had always liked her, despite their different natures, but failed to show it -- because he had never expressed his true emotions, nowhere and to no one. Well, at least until his incarceration.
In his answering letter, he tried to explain this new experience to Tom and finally dared to send his regards and sincere wishes for a happy future to Julia. When he was greeted back and learned that she agreed with Levitt about Derek's innocence, he even had to fight back tears of joy, an entirely new emotion for the ever-so-cold Dark Lord. Well, it seemed he had to accept the fact that he was about to convert. Probably not the whole way to a shining Jedi knight, like the eponym his nickname was based on, but it was a start.
Eileen was still angry enough at him to strictly forbid any mention of his name or the case itself in her vicinity. But, as Derek well knew, she would be forced to endure it, if only for a short while. Bellamy had told him that some members of the show had been summoned as witnesses for the prosecution, including her. Tom and Julia, however, reported to Bellamy to testify for Derek's defence, a fact that would stir not only a lot of questions, but probably trouble for them both as well, especially if the jury found him guilty...
***
The evening before court, Bellamy insisted they run through every item one last time. When he mentioned the deputy would be the very same Nichols as in the custody hearing, Derek frowned. He didn't like that man from the start and would have preferred someone else.
"We could have got deputies far worse, Mr. Wills," Bellamy remarked. "Usually he is severe, but not mean. I worry far more about the judge. The originally appointed one had to transfer our case over some urgent family matter; now we'll have to convince a woman that you are not the big bad wolf that killed poor Little Red Riding Hood."
"Great! As if I've had luck with women lately." Derek sighed and shook his head. "Or ever at all," he added far more quietly. "So let's hope for a predominantly male jury, then."
Bellamy allowed himself one of his rare smiles before he returned to his papers.
"Let's get back to the facts. Nichols has summoned the following witnesses: Detectives Shaw and Connelly, one Dr. Helena Chaketis from the PD's forensic lab, the bartender of the ‘Box Seat', then of course the regular guest who identified you, Ms. Peterson's friend who found her, the night concierge of your hotel, Ms. Rand, Ms. Cartwright..."
"Karen?" Derek's eyes widened out of pure disbelief. "Karen will testify against me? She owes me everything she achieved with the show!"
"Well... I don't know if she reported to Nichols or if he summoned her, Mr. Wills. If he did, she had no choice."
With a sigh Derek leaned back in his chair and bit his lower lip. He could only hope that Nichols wouldn't get her to mention their private casting session; it would...
"Do you know one Devan Sundaram?" Bellamy inquired. "He's listed, too, but I can't see any relation of the case to a politician's secretary."
"Oh bloody hell!"
Derek inhaled sharply, and then rested his forehead on the table for a short moment before turning to Bellamy, who looked worried.
"What is it, Mr. Wills?"
"Dev was Karen's fiancé. He... we had a kind of fight once, when he learned about..."
He lowered his head, clenched his jaw and hesitated, but he was well aware that it was absolutely necessary to be honest with his attorney, so he finally continued:
"After the callback audition, I summoned Karen to my apartment, for some kind of... let's say, private recall, to help me decide if she or Ivy should get the Marilyn part..."
When he heard Bellamy's deep disappointed sigh, he knew he didn't need to tell more.
"You really are a prowling wolf, Mr. Wills," the attorney stated. "And I'm sure you know damn well how hard it will be to convince anyone of at least some doubt about you being guilty."
"Yes."
Still staring at the floor, Derek pressed his lips together and ran his hand through his hair.
"Did you sleep with her?"
"No. We didn't even kiss. She performed ‘Happy Birthday, Mr. President', leaned into me, our legs touched. Nothing more! She left right after she finished the song."
"At least that's something; was she fully-clothed?"
A short, bitter laugh escaped Derek, he shook his head.
"She wore nothing but one of my shirts, which she probably found in the bathroom, and her panties. But I didn't ask her to, you have my word! I just prompted her to show me a perfect Marilyn, because in audition, I was truly impressed by her voice but wasn't sure about the sexual charisma necessary for the role."
"So you didn't touch her, or worse, offer her the role in exchange for sexual favors?"
"Definitely not!" Derek locked eyes again with Bellamy. "Nor with Ivy Lynn, though I had an affair with her and gave her the part of Marilyn. We liked each other, had fun together -- it just fitted, at least for a while. But I never offered or made a deal with either of them!"
"Good for you. And we can be glad that Ms. Lynn is excused by her therapist, otherwise I'd dare say a sentence would be as good as pronounced. So, let's see who's testifying for defence..."
"Not much," Derek murmured. Though he'd lived through so many firsts since that fateful night, he still discovered new ones. To be dependent on other people's opinions or even their help he still struggled with, after so many years of managing and deciding everything on his own.
"Unfortunately not," Bellamy confirmed. "But, as in many matters, quality is often far more important than quantity. Ms. Houston and Mr. Levitt have both known you a long time, so I count on their testimonies quite a lot. The result of the lie detector test is of help, too, but Dr. Stanton will make clear that this proves only that you actually had a black-out, not that you didn't tie and gag the victim."
"I know. But I'm glad that at least it will spare me being called a liar and coward."
"That's true. So there's only one thing left."
Derek raised an eyebrow.
"And what would that be?"
His attorney fixed his gaze more intensively.
"The very fact you've concealed since the beginning: The reason you drank yourself into such a precarious condition; why you were in that part of town at all, only an hour after the preview's end."
"No."
Derek's pressed lips were only small lines. He folded his arms in front of his chest, lifted his chin and held eye contact without a flinch.
"I won't talk about that."
"Maybe you don't have a choice, Mr. Wills. When every witness has finished, all evidence is presented and our chances seem as bad as I'm afraid they will, I have to call you to the stand -- and then I will ask you about it. And I advise you strongly to confess the truth, whatever it is. Because I'm absolutely certain that you are not hiding something illegal but very, very personal."
Again, Derek looked away, sighed and bit his lower lip.
"As I thought. Prepare to be forced to share whatever it is, Mr. Wills. If it's intense enough, perhaps it can save you." With that, Bellamy left his client to another night of desperate tossing and turning.
Despite all changes he had experienced in his mind and emotions since his arrest, the pure thought of revealing the demons which drove him into that bar haunted Derek a great deal more than the prospect of further imprisonment.
Continued in Part 12
Author: blackpoetcat
Rating: R
Character: Derek Wills
Disclaimer: NBC owns all, just playing drama with
Summary: Everyone knows he doesn't give a shit about anything but the show. So when Derek's life capsizes, will anyone give a shit about him?
( Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6, Part 7, Part 8, Part 9, Part 10)
The following weeks passed surprisingly easier and much faster than Derek had feared. As Kevin had told him, he adapted to the daily routine in a few days, despite his typically low patience. Of course the long and ever-varied conversations with his fellow inmate helped as much as the regular letters from Tom and the result of the lie detector test to balance his mind.
It was now official that he didn't pretend, but really had a total black-out, though they had to break and repeat the test after he got annoyed with the illogical questions necessary to check the correct technical function and started to bark out the answers, therefore falsifying the first results. This and the agreement between him, Bellamy and the guards to not accept any visitors from press were a great relief for Derek. To learn how much the media dragged him through the mud was bad enough.
As sorry as he was to lose someone who actually became a friend, he was truly happy for Kevin when he left prison for good, because he got away with the hoped-for probation sentence and 200 hours of community service. Though he needed to find a new job, he was confident he'd get one. Before this incident, he had worked as first barkeeper in a four-star hotel lounge, which explained to Derek his fine manners and education.
Well, of course none of the upper class hotels or bars would hire someone on probation or with a record at all, but there were plenty of establishments in town whose owners wouldn't bother, as long as they could get a professional cocktail mixer at good value, Kevin told Derek when he visited him two days after his release. And he not only promised to stay in contact, no matter how Derek's case turned out, but brought him a cheesecake his wife had baked for Derek out of gratitude for being her husband's friend during confinement.
Never before in his life had anyone baked a cake for him, not even his mother who didn't like any kind of housework at all, so Derek was genuinely moved by this gesture. Especially when he remembered his assumption about her leaving Kevin. Either his friend didn't tell her or she was gracious or good-humoured enough to overlook it.
Miles O'Shaugn was the only person with whom he shared the delicious cake, for he didn't get as close with any other inmate as with Kevin, but instead was on a first name basis with the officer.
***
Despite the Boston scandal, 'Bombshell' was on its way to great success, he learned from Tom. The show got standing ovations in every town in which they performed previews, and no less than good, but mostly excellent critical reviews. Contrary to Derek's apprehension, Karen grew stronger with each performance and now had the support of everyone. Levitt mentioned that Dominguez didn't change any major decision Derek ever made, neither in choreographic nor costumes or dance procedures, so at least his work hadn't been dropped like himself.
Also he told Derek that though the cast seemed generally more relaxed than under his direction, especially after the media hype about the crime scandal had diminished, it was still obvious that after every little mistake during rehearsals they were anxiously awaiting the usual outburst. Sometimes Tom couldn't help but snicker openly, given their faces when realization dawned after Dominguez' soft and polite standard remark "Ah, you can do better; try again, will you?"
In the first letters they exchanged, there was still an awkward tension between them, unsurprising considering the barrier they had built eleven years ago. But the longer and the more intensively they shared each other's lives, the more their writing eased up and after six weeks Derek felt as if he had been part of Tom's life forever. He was happy to follow Levitt's constantly growing relationship with Sam and -- though not without troublesome emotions by reading about her -- to learn that Ivy made good progress in rehab. Nevertheless, to Derek's relief, her therapist attested that her mental condition was still too fragile for her to attend his trial as a witness.
When he read about Julia's destroyed marriage, that she was getting a divorce because she was with child from Michael Swift, he buried his face in his hands and for the first time not only felt honestly sorry for her, but in some way partially responsible. Now he understood why she had been so distracted, even absent for quite some time, and he loathed himself for not caring. He had always liked her, despite their different natures, but failed to show it -- because he had never expressed his true emotions, nowhere and to no one. Well, at least until his incarceration.
In his answering letter, he tried to explain this new experience to Tom and finally dared to send his regards and sincere wishes for a happy future to Julia. When he was greeted back and learned that she agreed with Levitt about Derek's innocence, he even had to fight back tears of joy, an entirely new emotion for the ever-so-cold Dark Lord. Well, it seemed he had to accept the fact that he was about to convert. Probably not the whole way to a shining Jedi knight, like the eponym his nickname was based on, but it was a start.
Eileen was still angry enough at him to strictly forbid any mention of his name or the case itself in her vicinity. But, as Derek well knew, she would be forced to endure it, if only for a short while. Bellamy had told him that some members of the show had been summoned as witnesses for the prosecution, including her. Tom and Julia, however, reported to Bellamy to testify for Derek's defence, a fact that would stir not only a lot of questions, but probably trouble for them both as well, especially if the jury found him guilty...
***
The evening before court, Bellamy insisted they run through every item one last time. When he mentioned the deputy would be the very same Nichols as in the custody hearing, Derek frowned. He didn't like that man from the start and would have preferred someone else.
"We could have got deputies far worse, Mr. Wills," Bellamy remarked. "Usually he is severe, but not mean. I worry far more about the judge. The originally appointed one had to transfer our case over some urgent family matter; now we'll have to convince a woman that you are not the big bad wolf that killed poor Little Red Riding Hood."
"Great! As if I've had luck with women lately." Derek sighed and shook his head. "Or ever at all," he added far more quietly. "So let's hope for a predominantly male jury, then."
Bellamy allowed himself one of his rare smiles before he returned to his papers.
"Let's get back to the facts. Nichols has summoned the following witnesses: Detectives Shaw and Connelly, one Dr. Helena Chaketis from the PD's forensic lab, the bartender of the ‘Box Seat', then of course the regular guest who identified you, Ms. Peterson's friend who found her, the night concierge of your hotel, Ms. Rand, Ms. Cartwright..."
"Karen?" Derek's eyes widened out of pure disbelief. "Karen will testify against me? She owes me everything she achieved with the show!"
"Well... I don't know if she reported to Nichols or if he summoned her, Mr. Wills. If he did, she had no choice."
With a sigh Derek leaned back in his chair and bit his lower lip. He could only hope that Nichols wouldn't get her to mention their private casting session; it would...
"Do you know one Devan Sundaram?" Bellamy inquired. "He's listed, too, but I can't see any relation of the case to a politician's secretary."
"Oh bloody hell!"
Derek inhaled sharply, and then rested his forehead on the table for a short moment before turning to Bellamy, who looked worried.
"What is it, Mr. Wills?"
"Dev was Karen's fiancé. He... we had a kind of fight once, when he learned about..."
He lowered his head, clenched his jaw and hesitated, but he was well aware that it was absolutely necessary to be honest with his attorney, so he finally continued:
"After the callback audition, I summoned Karen to my apartment, for some kind of... let's say, private recall, to help me decide if she or Ivy should get the Marilyn part..."
When he heard Bellamy's deep disappointed sigh, he knew he didn't need to tell more.
"You really are a prowling wolf, Mr. Wills," the attorney stated. "And I'm sure you know damn well how hard it will be to convince anyone of at least some doubt about you being guilty."
"Yes."
Still staring at the floor, Derek pressed his lips together and ran his hand through his hair.
"Did you sleep with her?"
"No. We didn't even kiss. She performed ‘Happy Birthday, Mr. President', leaned into me, our legs touched. Nothing more! She left right after she finished the song."
"At least that's something; was she fully-clothed?"
A short, bitter laugh escaped Derek, he shook his head.
"She wore nothing but one of my shirts, which she probably found in the bathroom, and her panties. But I didn't ask her to, you have my word! I just prompted her to show me a perfect Marilyn, because in audition, I was truly impressed by her voice but wasn't sure about the sexual charisma necessary for the role."
"So you didn't touch her, or worse, offer her the role in exchange for sexual favors?"
"Definitely not!" Derek locked eyes again with Bellamy. "Nor with Ivy Lynn, though I had an affair with her and gave her the part of Marilyn. We liked each other, had fun together -- it just fitted, at least for a while. But I never offered or made a deal with either of them!"
"Good for you. And we can be glad that Ms. Lynn is excused by her therapist, otherwise I'd dare say a sentence would be as good as pronounced. So, let's see who's testifying for defence..."
"Not much," Derek murmured. Though he'd lived through so many firsts since that fateful night, he still discovered new ones. To be dependent on other people's opinions or even their help he still struggled with, after so many years of managing and deciding everything on his own.
"Unfortunately not," Bellamy confirmed. "But, as in many matters, quality is often far more important than quantity. Ms. Houston and Mr. Levitt have both known you a long time, so I count on their testimonies quite a lot. The result of the lie detector test is of help, too, but Dr. Stanton will make clear that this proves only that you actually had a black-out, not that you didn't tie and gag the victim."
"I know. But I'm glad that at least it will spare me being called a liar and coward."
"That's true. So there's only one thing left."
Derek raised an eyebrow.
"And what would that be?"
His attorney fixed his gaze more intensively.
"The very fact you've concealed since the beginning: The reason you drank yourself into such a precarious condition; why you were in that part of town at all, only an hour after the preview's end."
"No."
Derek's pressed lips were only small lines. He folded his arms in front of his chest, lifted his chin and held eye contact without a flinch.
"I won't talk about that."
"Maybe you don't have a choice, Mr. Wills. When every witness has finished, all evidence is presented and our chances seem as bad as I'm afraid they will, I have to call you to the stand -- and then I will ask you about it. And I advise you strongly to confess the truth, whatever it is. Because I'm absolutely certain that you are not hiding something illegal but very, very personal."
Again, Derek looked away, sighed and bit his lower lip.
"As I thought. Prepare to be forced to share whatever it is, Mr. Wills. If it's intense enough, perhaps it can save you." With that, Bellamy left his client to another night of desperate tossing and turning.
Despite all changes he had experienced in his mind and emotions since his arrest, the pure thought of revealing the demons which drove him into that bar haunted Derek a great deal more than the prospect of further imprisonment.
Continued in Part 12