To you i am ( Read more... )

4 a.m.
I'm awake. I've been up since about 3.
My room is an icebox. Seriously, it's bloody freezing in here.
I can't sleep because I think.
I think too much & sleep very little lately.
Fuck it. I'll sleep all I want when i'm dead.
I'm really hungry, but i don't want to go into the kitchen
because I'll make too much noise.
Why is this journal the only one I ( Read more... )

Caffeine.

Cigarettes.

Sex.

They get me through the day.
Well, two out of three ain't bad.

These blades of grass are razor blades.
These rays of sun are burning through.
All along the sky are clouds scattered
over a sad sky so blue.

I pen my thoughts of you.
I pen them down for me.
I'll ne'er forget what you meant to me.
This, my friend, I guarantee.

All along the sky are clouds
white and fluffy as can be.
The warmest rays from the sun above
are ( Read more... )

i waited in the basement for all these months ( Read more... )

So, I got mega hours this week.
I'm so excited.
The first draft of the schedule had me at 5 hours.
Chris[topher Newman] did a little magic.
Presto. 13 hours.
A little more voodoo from my homeboy Chris...
Tantaran! I've got 18 hours this week.
The most i've ever had at noodles.
radness reigns supreme.

I'm going back to school in January.
I turned down $9.50 ( Read more... )

what the fuck is this?
who the fuck are we?
more importantly, who the fuck am i?
i am but a spec in this huge world.
of least importance to anyone, let me die.
but before i go
i must say this
they've taken all they can
because i've given all i can give.
i tell ya, the past 12 months have been the greatest of my life.
and they've been equally horrid.
i'm ( Read more... )

ive gone back in time and i cant get the fuck out.
i thought you were dead, marco,
but you're still here.
i want you to disappear.
vanish into thin air.
take with you all this fucking despair.
can't hold back.
can't refrain.
you hear that? it's me.
i'm going fucking insane.
let's take a little trip down memory lane...
and get lost in what was lost
get lost in ( Read more... )

I've crossed paths with another lonely night.
I notice because I can't sleep tight.
You were right, "the silence is nice."
It closes my ears, I just can't close my eyes.

So, it's three thirty-something in the aye-emm.
I can't sleep. I'm freezing.
Seriously, it's so cold in here, even my hands are icy.
My hands never get cold!

'twas quite a lonely friday ( Read more... )

A dozen times of love i've spoken
& a dozen times my heart is broken.
At this rate,
I'll die at twenty-eight.
Of heartbreak, i'm sure.
Of heartbreak without a cure.
& i'm bleeding from the inside.
& my pulse has stopped pulsating.
There's a pain under my sternum
& i'm dying inside.

i wrote that like a million seconds ago.
it's not great and probably would ( Read more... )