I had a friend in high school who killed himself. I had known him since pre-school It took a while before it finally hit me that he was gone. It was just...wow. I can't really put into words how it made me feel...it just took me to this really weird place - a place I don't want to return to ever.
So, while I don't know exactly what you're going through (everyone's experience is different), I do have some idea of the weird things something like that can do to a person. Just want to let you know I can empathize, and I hope things get better for you soon.
Our lives are fragile. The moment we step outside of our homes we are subject to many things that can harm us. Being bipolar means that we're not even safe in our own bodies. I've tried to take my life several times and, obviously, made it through okay thanks to emergency rooms and medications. It scares the shit out of my family that I am home alone most of the day (being bipolar apparently means you can't keep a job, either).
We just have to take each day as it comes to us and hope for the best.
being bipolar means you have a physical disorder, not that you are unsafe. Bipolar is an hard illness to deal with, but you are not out of control of it.
I'll bet your family has had the shit scared out of them. I would be shell shocked too from that abuse you have given them.
we do have to take each day for what it is and what we are, and not only hope for the best, make the best. A lot of times heavy lifting is required and thats where I see a lot of people on here shying away from.
I would be shell shocked too from that abuse you have given them.
i agree about the family being shit scared, but i wouldn't call it "abuse" because being bipolar is not something that is done on purpose...
i, too, have been hospitalized numerous times, and yes - my family, too, has been thru the wringer w/me, but it's not been done on purpose... What I said sounds harsh i know, but it is truth. Im not saying having bipolar is intentional, no more than I would blame one for having any illness. Sick or not, we do not exist in a vacuum. Others around us are affected by the choices we make. The idea that I have bipolar and I can't be responsible for my choices because of that is not only abusive to those around you, but abusive to one's self
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First off, I'm terribly sorry for you and your b/f's loss. There's really nothing else to say, because it leaves a void.
I made a good friend volunteering at my local crisis line two years ago; she was bipolar, and I really admired how open she was about her illness. We had a lot in common and she was a great person. Her name was Carla and she committed suicide in July. In addition to being very sad, it hit me in a visceral way nothing else in my life has.
I can't share your experience, but I can understand where you're coming from. That feeling of being unsafe that a comment above mentioned; I've been in a perpetual state of bargaining for the past while; "if I take my meds" "if I see the shrink" "if I get enough sleep/exercise/healthy food/good social life" then I'll be safe. I think what made my bones cold and left me feeling dead inside when my friend died was the realization that I wasn't safe
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So, while I don't know exactly what you're going through (everyone's experience is different), I do have some idea of the weird things something like that can do to a person. Just want to let you know I can empathize, and I hope things get better for you soon.
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You and I need to exchange phone numbers, really.
I feel bad about all of this. I do.
I have never been what you are going through, but, you are still in my thoughts.....
I am going to post something in this community later on....
Because.......
I just cannot deal with this anymore.....
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(The comment has been removed)
I will email you my number today.
And thank you for thinking of me})
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(The comment has been removed)
Be well.
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We just have to take each day as it comes to us and hope for the best.
I'm sorry for your loss...
Take care of yourself.
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I'll bet your family has had the shit scared out of them. I would be shell shocked too from that abuse you have given them.
we do have to take each day for what it is and what we are, and not only hope for the best, make the best. A lot of times heavy lifting is required and thats where I see a lot of people on here shying away from.
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(The comment has been removed)
i agree about the family being shit scared, but i wouldn't call it "abuse" because being bipolar is not something that is done on purpose...
i, too, have been hospitalized numerous times, and yes - my family, too, has been thru the wringer w/me, but it's not been done on purpose...
What I said sounds harsh i know, but it is truth. Im not saying having bipolar is intentional, no more than I would blame one for having any illness. Sick or not, we do not exist in a vacuum. Others around us are affected by the choices we make. The idea that I have bipolar and I can't be responsible for my choices because of that is not only abusive to those around you, but abusive to one's self ( ... )
Reply
I made a good friend volunteering at my local crisis line two years ago; she was bipolar, and I really admired how open she was about her illness. We had a lot in common and she was a great person. Her name was Carla and she committed suicide in July. In addition to being very sad, it hit me in a visceral way nothing else in my life has.
I can't share your experience, but I can understand where you're coming from. That feeling of being unsafe that a comment above mentioned; I've been in a perpetual state of bargaining for the past while; "if I take my meds" "if I see the shrink" "if I get enough sleep/exercise/healthy food/good social life" then I'll be safe. I think what made my bones cold and left me feeling dead inside when my friend died was the realization that I wasn't safe ( ... )
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