SPN fic: Dazzleland 9/10

[big_pink]

Chapter 9/Coming to Grief

WIPPITY WIP WIP: Gen, PG-13. WIP, penultimate chapter. Horror/drama.

Big Fat Violence: I have a really high tolerance for violence. I do. Some of the rest of you, maybe not so much. In addition to the phenomenal body-count, this chapter is also incredibly…gut-wrenching. Fair warning, don’t read it if your meds are

Comments

[blackcat333_99]

As he ran three floors down, right into the bowels of the building, Dean slid the safety off the Glock. It was open season now.

This final line - "open season" - that sent chills down my spine. Perfect transition into the Dean we see in Croatoan. Absolutely perfect.

Sam leaving for college - breaks my heart. It really did have to go down something like that, per all the clues we've been given in canon and the established relationships among the Winchesters. *sniff*

More. :) (Yup, I'm greedy like that.)

[big_pink]

See? Getting Dean from Crossroads to Croatoan? My whole freakin' POINT. Thanks for noticing. Whew. *wipes brow. Gets another beer*

[gottalovev]

oh GOD. you break me in tiny pieces. in the past, with Dean physically not even able to talk when his family breaks, so painful.

But Sam’s leaving had been gradual, had happened over months, was so incremental it had occurred in geologic time, a wearing away of the ties that bound. ... All this now was only the snapping break of the final frayed bindings; at the most basic level, the worn bindings held together elements already separate and apart.

and the hurt in John too. ow. *clutches chest*

and in the present... *shivers* oh that is so fucked up. Dean diving in the hole, not even caring that he could get caught because his sam in in danger. Sam, who wants to save the kids, big damn hero he is. Billy, so fucked up, poor kid. and Dean, once more, seeing the dead kids and just threatening to fall apart right there.

babe, here I bow down. it's a wonderful fic. knowing it is about to end brings mixed feelings. I want to know, but I love this so much. merci ma belle. mais ow!

[gottalovev]

oh, and I suck at coding (câlisse). sorry.

you rock though. did I say that?

[big_pink]

Ch'toute fourrée, là. Yeah, neighbours dropped by -- and I'd gone over the river this afternoon and bought a bunch of Fin du Monde (why is Québec beer so much better than others?) and so now? Yeah, not so coherent. But thanks for the awesome coding. It's like you wanted to EMPHASIZE shit, you know? All italics. A sign of...*sniff* Love. Thanks.

[gottalovev]

t'as tout compris! c'est les italiques de l'amour!!!!

♥

*leers*

*gives another beer*

[ileliberte]

god, I don't even know what to say as feedback for you anymore. It's all so intense and heavy and emotionally rich it makes me want to cry it's so awfully good. Do you write professionally? Are there any huge novel length tomes by you out there that I can read?

Also, oh Dean, oh Sam

[big_pink]

Oh, I know. Heavy, intense, dark. So unlike me, really. But in for a penny, in for a pound. Next chapter's not going to be puppies and incense, either.

I write professionally, but nothing as fun as this ;) Mostly exhibition text and comic books and web sites.

Working on it, though. Encouragement such as yours puts wind in my sails, so thanks.

[cofax7]

Well, color me astonished that you're not a professional novelist. I'd have put money on it. It's not like we don't have novelists in fandom, after all.

I'd be happy to have your professional work on my bookshelf, at some point, so consider this extra encouragement, if it helps.

[big_pink]

Jesus H Christ, thank you. I honestly need to get back to it, the fic that's not fandom related. But how much fun is this, eh? And shopping around for an agent's a real pain, too. But really, really, thank you so much...encouragement is always needed and wanted. Cheers, Liz

[astiraa]

*blinks*

Holy crap. Intense isn't really the right word but I'm having trouble coming up with anything else. My heart feels like its been ripped out, mashed up and then kinda shoved back in even though it doesn't really fit anymore. I can't even fathom how one itty bitty chapter can bring a resolution to this cliffhanger, but I'm waiting on pins and needles to see what you have in store for us. :)

Also? This:

They were looking at each other and Dean knew exactly what Sam was saying, knew what he meant, that they didn’t have to do this, that they didn’t have to live like this, that there were roads still open to them.

It was more tempting than Sam probably knew, but it was only a dream, like everything else today, the sunlight and leaves and whirling sky.I've seen versions of Sam's leaving all over the place in fic (heck, I've even given it a go myself) but your descriptions are so vivid and surreal. I love Dean's dreamlike state through this whole exchange, his internal musings on photography and the falls. Its so perfect that he

[big_pink]

No, no. Intense is a good word. It's that, sure.

"I can't even fathom how one itty bitty chapter can bring a resolution to this cliffhanger, but I'm waiting on pins and needles to see what you have in store for us."

Yeah. You and me both *g* Actually, I suspect that the final chapter will be anything but 'itty bitty'. I kept saying to the betas, 'eh, don't worry, I'll just move that to the last chapter' and so now? Yeah, that last chapter has one or two things that gotta happen. AND I'm a big fan of the slow denoument (maybe not Tolkien-big, but you know...you gotta resolve shit).

That's tomorrow's problem, though. Glad you enjoyed.

[tabaqui]

Jesus. Christ.

Every bit of this flashback ripped me to shreds. Every bit of Dean's pov did the same. Sam trying to use every scrap of his knowledge to keep Billy in check made me grit my teeth and want to scream.

Dude, you are *killing me*. Oh, sure, it's kinda nice and there's pretty things to watch while i'm going down but.

Killing. Me. Dead.

John and Sam fighting *through* Dean, and he can't even fucking talk and...

And...

See? The dead can't talk in coherent sentences, apparently.
*sobs quietly*

[big_pink]

I kilt her ded. There she be. All ded-like.

Your icon says it all, là.

Promise. Next fic, shiny happy non-stop talkathon with hugging. PROMISE.

[tabaqui]

It doesn't matter!
I won't be able to enjoy it!
I AM DED!!

Jayzus.

*sniffle*