glamour, movement, magic, fat, perception double mirrored

[belenen]

Now that I am fat (by most assessments) I feel that people don't see my glamour, my unearthly ethereal magic, anymore. I realized this when watching The L Word again and seeing so many of my movements in Jenny -- the way ze puts hands on hips, or gestures, or tilts zir head, or moves zir eyes, or touches others, or responds to touch. I feel a

Comments

[classical_wolf]

People see my body and either make me invisible or project their shame onto me. - I understand what you mean.

One thing I've been trying to learn, is confidence about myself, and just trying to wear what makes me happy, regardless of how it makes me look (or if I'm trying too hard, etc).

I hear you about Jenny. I feel like a lot of that is body language and also charisma, which I feel I lack. I'm not good with body language, and my body/face isn't good at being that expressive.

Basically, I can relate to this whole post!

[blimeyzawn1]

I have a lot of thoughts on this, but am being lazy today, so I will leave you with my most important one.

First words uttered to Jeff about our first time meeting: "James is one of my fairy people, and so glamorous. We're going to fly to fairyland together."

[midwinter]

I want to recommit to consciously asking myself if I'm viewing fat people differently (not-viewing being the same as viewing, to me). I'm grateful for your sharing this, so that I can hopefully reduce any pain I'm contributing to and be more perceptive for everyone's benefit. I also am happy to be reminded that it is ok to live w/glamours -- sometimes I think this is a shameful thing, when I feel like I need it!

[raidingparty]

Good idea, I'll be doing the same.

[adi_stroyer]

I feel like the Magic in you has always been apparent. I see that same thing in you that I see in Jenny, that thing that makes her the place where my eyes go anytime she is on screen. The way you move your eyes and hands and hips are things I find myself staring at whenever I'm with you then looking away because I feel self conscious or maybe... rude? I used to think that thing was grace but you're right it's different and more. There is grace in it but it is more than that. You are the most magic person I've ever seen in the flesh. I wish more people could see that. I wish you could feel people seeing that more.