Part 6b/14 of What Danny Deserves, CSI:NY fic
Series: What Danny Deserves (06b/14)
Title: Failed Interventions I
Rating: R due to graphic violence and injuries, some swearing.
Summary: Mac manages to get Danny to have dinner with him.
Warnings: (highlight to read) extreme self-harm and immense emaciation.
Word count: 5675 (had to split it in two for livejournal though)
Author’s Note: I think you know by now that this is not for those who want Danny and Lindsay to live happily ever after. Also, I apologise but the tenses in this got a little messed up. If you see any mistakes, let me know please.
Disclaimer: I own nothing but I just had to tell this story. No money is being made.
part one: suspicion
part two: potential crime scene
part three: witness statements
part four: modus operandi
part five: interactions
part six a: failed interventions I
*******
“You’re gonna like this place, I come here a lot, usually alone, but the food is good.” Mac tells Danny.
“Detective Taylor!” A stout man with a moustache greets Mac with a hearty handshake. “And this must be Detective Messer!” The man foregoes shaking Danny’s bony hand and pulls him into a hug, the second hug Danny’s gotten tonight, so this time he’s not as tense, but the guy is still a stranger. “And such a beautiful baby girl, with her father’s eyes. Sit, sit. Now tell me what you want. No, don’t look at the menu, my chefs will cook you whatever you fancy. Tomato soup and bread will be brought out immediately, you should have brought the boy to us sooner, he’s skin and bones,”
“Ravi, please.”Mac grins. “I’ll have a lamb steak and Danny?”
“I’ll be okay with the soup but I think Lucy could use some warm milk to help her sleep, she’s a little excited.”
“Certainly sir.”
“Actually...” Danny calls out. “Can she have some chocolate milk? She deserves to be spoiled.” Ravi burst into a magnificent grin.
“As do you sir!” Ravi replies, jogging to the kitchens whilst Mac laughs.
“Okay, who are you and what have you done with the real Mac?” Danny asks.
“I’m not scary boss man any more, according to Adam.” Mac recalls. “I am a bit of a girl though, apparently. According to Adam, the way you mother-henned them was far more manly than me.” Danny laughs.
“He had to the balls to say that?” Danny is impressed.
“I’m not scary boss man any more.” Mac repeats. “He’s seen me drunk. He’s cooked me omelettes in the morning when I’ve crashed at his. He’s brought one-night stands round my place because I have a double bed and he doesn’t. He’s getting quite a cad, I’m thinking of just buying him a double bed.”
“You’re not gonna have any money left at this rate.” Danny looks horrified as he realises, “I never thanked you for the clothes.”
“You let me take you to dinner, that’s reward enough.”
“That’s backwards.” Danny shakes his head.
“No it’s not, and it wasn’t that expensive anyway.”
“Yeah, I’m a cheap date.”
“Bargain! Besides, not all of those clothes are for you. I got Don a tie. To replace the one I burned.” Mac confesses.
“Seriously?” Danny smiles. “I’ve been wanting forever to do that.”
“He thinks I was drunk but I wasn’t really. He’s got this new girlfriend, a fashion designer, so we were out celebrating. I had lost my tie hours ago but he still had that hideous orange one on and I kept waiting, for him to take it off, which he never did and Chad had given me a lighter earlier on in the day, to try and keep him off the cigarettes, so I ended up setting fire to Don’s tie, just to see if the flame would match.”
“I wish I’d been there.” Danny sighs, “But what’s Donny’s new girl like, is she good, can I trust her?”
“I think she’s good for him. She’s keeps asking about you, wants to know what you’ve done to make him all sulky.”
“I’ve done nothing!”
“I know. He’s just missing hanging out with you. He’s got a girlfriend now so the pining isn’t quite so bad but he’s still hankering for some quality time with his best friend. He’s going to kill me when he finds out about this. Okay, maybe that’s an exaggeration but I don’t think he’ll speak to me for a while, a day or so at least-“
“Did you always talk this much?” Danny squints, trying to recall.
“Sorry, did you want to say something?” Mac asks a little haughtily, before adjusting his tone. “Usually I can count on you to fill the awkward silences but in the absence of that, I’ve picked up a trait or two from Adam.”
“How is he? Adam?” Danny asks, “I’ve been trying to keep up with his tweets but my phone got a little wet once and I still haven’t had chance to get it changed. From what you’ve been saying, and it was a lot so I think only 5% has sunk into my thick skull, but he sounds like he’s doing well, and you sound like a good wing man.”
“I can’t take the credit, you’ve taught him well.” Mac replies, gnawing on some bread sticks. “He’s taught me a thing or two about social interaction. Like hugging.”
“Ah, so the hug was from Adam.” Danny understands.
“Er, not exactly. But I was in the labs, over-thinking as usual,” About Danny, “Adam came in and gave me a hug before rattling off the case breaker. His reminder to stop me from being scary boss man again, but to keep me as the boss man.”
“It’s a shame I missed your transformation from scary boss man to one of the boys.”
“Yeah, it is a shame.” Mac agrees. “I’m not sure if I’ll be one of the boys when they hear about this. They’ll be jealous and your friends can be real bitches, especially Donny.” Mac shakes his head, laughing.
“You’ll be alright, just give him the tie and he’ll love you forever. Y’know, you shouldn’t let them drink too much...”
“And I’m the mom?” Mac asks, almost insulted.
“I just mean, there are other ways to entertain them-“
“Danny, you’ve been able to drag them into babysitting and they’ve enjoyed it. You’ve dragged them to gay bars to rescue friends before and you made them have a *really* good time. You sing for them, you play pool with them, you talk to them. Danny, you *are* the entertainment. I can’t compete with that and I don’t want to.”
“You could take them to the opera.” Danny suggests. Mac scoffs. “No, I’m serious. I never saw why Hawkes hung out with a common guy like me. Adam’s too smart and Don, even he scrubs up well. You could take any of them to the opera. You couldn’t take me.”
“The Opera is about expressing and eliciting emotion. You already feel things too deeply...” Mac trails off, hoping Danny would just look up and read what was in his eyes.
Then Ravi interrupts the moment with several other waiters and numerous trays. Mac is served a rare steak with roast potatoes and peas in a creamy sauce. A bottle of expensive red wine is left on the table. Warm chocolate soy milk is served in a jug and in a glass for Danny. There are over a dozen kinds of bread served up, as well as a mild tomato soup. There are eggs, scrambled, fried and boiled. A jug of water.
“Thank you, this looks delicious.” Danny says, so politely. He takes a sip of the chocolate milk before pouring some in her juice bottle. “She’s gonna love it.”
“Any time, any time. Now eat up and enjoy.” Ravi smiles before he and the other waiters disappear into the kitchens or to deal with the few other customers.
Danny only manages to eat half a breadstick and a spoonful of scrambled egg before his stomach starts to cramp up and he heads to the little boys room whilst Mac keeps an eye on Lucy whilst also enjoying his steak. When Danny doesn’t come out though and Mac is on his second glass of wine, he figures something is wrong and leaves Lucy in her baby-seat to go check on Danny.
Danny’s laying unconscious on the bathroom floor, his face so pale and his body is twitching. Mac’s medical training should kick in but he can’t think, his body acts on instinct to though and he rushes to Danny’s side and kneels beside his body, he places his jacket underneath Danny’s head, he keeps calling Danny’s name until Danny’s eyes finally start to open.
“Where’s Lucy?” Danny asks, his eyes closing already and Mac’s hand is on his cheek, gently shaking him again. Ravi enters, carrying Lucy.
“The little one was crying and...” Ravi trails off as he sees Danny lying on the floor. “I’ll call an ambulance.” Lucy is still clinging to him when Danny comes too again.
“No. Please. No. No ambulance.”
“Danny-“ Mac scolds him softly. “You’re weak. You should be in hospital. With a feeding tube.”
“I’m fine.” Danny insists, trying to stand. If it wasn’t for Mac’s strong arms supporting him, he would have fallen. “Just... blood loss.”
“Danny-“ Mac pleads, still supporting Danny as he takes Lucy from Ravi. Danny’s leaning heavily on the wall, skin so pale and clammy.
“I didn’t tell her.” Danny pants, slightly breathless.
“What?” Mac asks, confused, concerned.
“Lindsay. I should have called her. Told her I was taking Lucy for a walk.” Danny’s head droops again but he keeps conscious, aware of Lucy whimpering in his arms. “I can’t let her worry. I can’t leave. I’ve got to go home. Please Mac, I just want to go home. I have to. Shoulda never have left.” Danny struggles to stand on his own two feet before valiantly walking to their table and placing Lucy in her stroller. He tries to push her but he falls to his knees, blanking out and hitting his head on the laminate flooring before Mac has a chance to catch him.
“Danny, wake up, wake up, Danny!” Mac shouts.
“Mac?”
“It’s okay, I’ve got you.” Mac pulls him into another hug. “I’ll drive you home.” Danny nods weakly, passing in and out of consciousness as Mac gets their things together, trying to stop Lucy from worrying when that’s all he can do. Ravi tries to get Danny to sit up, to drink some cold water, when all Danny can do is mutter apologies. Mac tries to pay Ravi for the food and for his time.
“Just take good care of him.” Ravi tells Mac, making sure to give him a bag of all the cooked meat and spare bread and the raw edible vegetables. Mac nods as Danny struggles to make it to the car.
Danny sleeps in the car, throwing up what little he managed to eat and muttering apologies to Mac. Mac knows he should take Danny to the hospital, or at least call Sheldon but Danny’s voice is ringing in his head, pleading to go home, like a little boy and Mac knows he’ll be able to protect him, at least for tonight. He can’t think beyond that, he should, but he can’t.
“Wake up Danny, you’re home.” Mac tells him, parking the car. Danny stirs, wiping the vomit on the back of his hand.
“Thank you. I’m sorry.” Danny pulls Lucy out of the car and tries to drag her, her stroller, car seat and the bag with her nappies and drinks cup and other things up to his apartment. He’s still woozy on his feet, swaying and he looks surprised when Mac steadies him.
“I’m not.” Mac answers. “Sorry.” He clarifies. “But you still haven’t eaten.” Mac reminds him, taking all of Lucy’s paraphernalia as Danny carries Lucy, slowly and carefully. “At the very least you should see a Doctor, see if you can get something to help you keep food down. Danny?”
“I hear you, I hear you.” Danny shrugs, unlocking the door, placing Lucy in her crib before throwing the clothes he just wore into a black bin bag, too exhausted to care about getting naked in front of Mac. Mac tries not to look but he’s distracted by the blood seeping through the bandage on Danny’s thigh. “I’ve got washing to do.” Danny mutters, pulling on a pair of boxers that Mac just bought him. There’s only one basket and it only has Lindsay’s clothes, Danny looks at the three bags full of his own dirty clothes and sighs. Lindsay’s clothes are too good to be washed with his own and Lindsay likes her laundry basket empty. Mac knows Danny had a washing machine in his old apartment but the one for Lindsay’s apartment is shared by the whole floor. Danny throws the baby monitor in Lindsay’s laundry basket as he heads to the laundry room.
Mac waits patiently, worried Danny’s passed out again but he eventually returns, carrying Lindsay’s washed and dried clothes and he sets up the ironing board.
“I could do that if you want.” Mac offers.
“You’re still here?” Danny asks, surprised and Mac suspects if Danny’s body could have jumped it would have. “I mean, no, thank you. Why are you here?”
“Danny, you passed out. You do that again, you could choke on your own vomit, anything could happen.”
“I guess I’m no good to you if I’m dead, am I?” Danny realises. “Or unconscious.” Danny bites his lip as he thinks back to tonight, so lost in thought he lets the iron burn Lindsay’s t-shirt. “Fuck!” Mac stops Danny before he has a chance to run the iron over the back of his hand.
“Danny!” Danny looks at his hand in shock, “Jesus Danny!”
“I’m sorry.” Danny whispers, switching off the iron and backing away from it, sitting down as his back hits a wall.
“No, I’m sorry.” Mac apologises, sitting down next to Danny.
“Please don’t fire me. I’ll get better. I promise I will.” Danny pleads, sounding like a little boy.
“I won’t fire you Danny.” Mac assures him. “I’m here for you.”
“You need to go.” Danny sighs. Mac turns to him and starts to protest. “It’s getting late. You can’t stay here all night.” Mac blinks, he never thought of that, and he never realised how much he wants to until now. He wants to stay, he wants to make sure Danny has a good night’s sleep, he wants to make sure Danny has some yoghurt, or toast, or something in the morning.
“I don’t want to leave.” Mac confesses.
“I’ll be okay.” Danny assures him, eyes pleading with Mac. Mac realises he’s beaten.
“Okay.” Mac repeats, before getting to his feet. “Just, get some sleep and try to eat something.”
“I’ll try.” Danny looks like he could fall asleep in that very spot.
“And your bandage needs changing.” Mac tells Danny, closing the door behind him. He drives home, exhausted and falls into a fitful sleep.
**********
Mac sees Danny at work the next day, at first he mistakes the black circles under Danny’s eyes as exhaustion. Then he sees the bruise on Danny’s cheek. When Mac talks to him, Danny’s eyes are unfocused as if he’s replaying some sort of scene in his mind. His voice is soft, slow and impersonal.
Then Lindsay enters the room, the tiniest trace of blood on her wedding ring.
Mac realises he’s lost one of the few chances he could ever have to save Danny.
TBC
part seven: failed interventions II