Chuck Versus The Fan - Chuck Versus The Tango
In case you missed it, here’s my review for Helicopter and here's the Pilot ;] Which means it’s time for…
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Chuck Versus the Tango
We open on some mediocre painting in Tehran, Iran and a man is critiquing it, basically saying how crap it is.
Or that
Just as he finishes his sentence, BAM! He shoots the man next to him and takes the painting. Two weeks later, we find ourselves in Madrid, and a similar scenario follows, this time with the first man being shot by the “buyer.” Finally, we end up in an art gallery in downtown L.A. where an English man politely tells the seller that his money is on the desk. So, no rude, snarky comments (or subtitles) then. The seller checks that the money is legit and reaches for his gun, but! He’s too late! Polite English Man beat him to it, continuing the cycle after all. And he calls the painting a piece of crap. Awesome.
Cut to one month later, this time in northeast L.A. and Chuck is being held at gunpoint, begging his assailant not to shoot him.
Aaaaand, surprise! It’s a kid! With a video game gun! It’s hardly a surprise that this scene is a fake-out (seeing as the previous two episodes have done the same) but I can’t help but love it as much as the other two. I guess I’m a sucker for a well executed, albeit predictable, fake-out. The music immediately changes tone to some smooth Spoon and we see that Chuck is helping this kid get the toy gun to work properly.
And more evidence of Zac Levi’s relation to the Jolly Green Giant
The kid is upset that the gun is busted but Chuck tells him that for Mr. Bartowski, “busted is just a state of mind.” Holy. Crap. I really can’t remember the last time I fell for a character so quickly. He is the very definition of endearing. A couple of quick tweaks later and the gun is working perfectly. Tang interrupts, Big Mike wants to see Chuck but he blows Tang off. And he calls the kid “sir.” Literally a second later, Big Mike is right behind him and he’s not happy. Chuck immediately tells him he was just on his way to see him. And I fall over laughing. Aaand he asks the kid to pause the game. And I start to cry from all the laughing.
Chuck enters Big Mike’s office and - whoa. That is a giant fish O_O Anyway. Big Mike looks pretty serious and Chuck keeps a safe distance between the two of them. After an uncomfortable moment of silence, Biggy Mac asks Chuck what he wants in life. Chuck, as usual, quips back something witty but Big Mike brings the conversation back to the important topic - Buy More. Specifically, where Chuck sees himself at Buy More in 5 to 10 years. I love Chuck’s response, “Honestly...? I have absolutely no idea.”
But Big Mike is prepared. As Chuck knows, there’s an assistant manager position open and right now? It’s down to him and Harry Tang. The question is (and Big Mike asks it), does Chuck want the job? I love how genuine Chuck’s reaction is. He pauses, mulls it over all “is this really what I want in life…?”, for just a second before saying he does; though I’m not sure he’s even fully convinced himself. But it’s enough for Big Mike. If Chuck wants the job, he’s got to show him something.
I think Chuck’s brain went to the same place mine did…
Cut to… a cage? If this is their warehouse, Buy More is worse off than I thought. Anyway. Chuck’s got some bad news for his Nerds. Big Mike wants them to fix the entire cage’s worth of junk (and, holy hell, it’s a lot of junk) in two days or he’s giving the job to Tang. He apologies to everyone, saying “guys” and then addresses the female Nerd, Anna, separately. But “guys” is fine. Chuck, however, think it’s not right; they need something non-gender specific. Maybe team? Fellow Nerd Herders? Lester offers up “the Lesters” and then Jeff, being, well, Jeff offers up something completely out-of-the-box and left-field…drum roll, please… Chuck’s Stable of Hos. Oh, my God, this episode is amazing (though, Helicopter started off well, too).
Morgan comes in and immediately pales and takes in a breath. He heard about the deal and he’s there to help. Only, well… a.) He lacks the skill set and b.) Old computers freak the crap outta’ him. It’s taking him an immense amount of courage just to stand in the doorway (Chuck’s really proud of his little buddy). More importantly, Morgan brings his friend news. His lady is in the building. And she’s looking good.
Without the context, these pictures look very different
Cue the sexy Spanish music and slow-mo as Chuck makes his way to the Nerd Herd desk. Sarah, in her Wienerlicious uniform, of course, is at the front of the store. The cover-couple meet up and Sarah immediately whispers to Chuck to kiss her. Chuck is a bit taken aback but Sarah insists; they’ve been on three dates and they have to sell it. Chuck anxiously eyes the area around them before giving Sarah the most chaste kiss on the cheek any couple has shared, cover or otherwise. But Chuck’s not really good with the PDA. So Sarah decides to take him somewhere more private, like the Home Theater Center.
Chuck looks confused as all hell and Morgan looks thrilled for him, but in the calm, quiet sense of the word (no, I am not being snarky). Casey instantly makes a beeline for the pair but Morgan, thinking it’s a cock block, tries to step in. And Casey does his, I’m hoping, signature move
XD. Poor Morgan
Casey enters the room and the mood immediately drops. But next time Sarah wants to talk to the subject (yeah, you read that right. He just called Chuck “the subject”), she needs to let him in on it. She snarks right back but Chuck interrupts. And calls them mom and dad XD
Sarah lays out pictures of the buyers from a few weeks ago on the table and Chuck, without being asked, takes a look, “Why are these people sleeping?” Oh, Chuck. You really are so innocent, aren’t you? He looks horrified when his handlers shine some light on the subject for him. Not to mention, the Intersect isn’t responding and Chuck would really rather not take a good look at the pictures; they are kinda’ creepy. Before anyone can argue, Jeff pops in, food and newspaper in hand, saying he was going to take a nap and he’ll be back in five. The camera zooms in on the paper and we see the ugly painting has made the cover.
Chuck makes that amazing face (XD) as the Intersect is activated. And now it’s very apparent that they’ve really hammered out the details of how this works. We see a close up of Chuck’s eye as his pupil dilates, an image, a few more images with some very specific information, followed by the same image and Chuck’s eye, his pupil constricting, to close it out.
Like so
And with that, Jeff leaves.
The second he’s gone, Sarah asks what Chuck saw. I guess Intersect face is official then? :D How else would she know? But Chuck’s not 100% certain of what he saw… Water lilies in a painting, an auction and the name La Ciudad (the city? Like, the movie The City?); Chuck thinks he’s going to be at the auction tomorrow night. The minute the words leave his mouth, he tells his handlers he’s going to go fix some hard drives, clearly wanting no part in the “spy stuff.”
Back at home, Ellie is celebrating as if Chuck is already the assistant manager (and she’s decorating cupcakes) but Chuck (after some great sibling interaction; seriously, in the way they interact physically, they are probably the most realistic, convincing siblings I’ve seen in a long time) reminds his older sister that he hasn’t gotten the job yet. And Morgan creepily eyes Ellie again. Upon seeing Chuck’s radiating enthusiasm, Ellie’s hopeful that Chuck is getting tired of the Buy More and will find a real job. Morgan quips and it actually makes me smile (go, Morgan!). Ellie clarifies for the bearded one; Chuck went to Stanford. As Ellie explains her reasoning, Chuck sneaks a cupcake in the background and steals the shot XD
Yup, it was so awesome, it needed to be giffed (giffed? Gifed? I don’t know)
Morgan is well aware of where Chuck matriculated but he reminds Ellie that Chuck was unceremoniously expelled senior year. He hates to bring it up but they have to set some realistic goals, after all. Ellie is getting heated now; is Morgan talking about Chuck’s goals or Morgan’s goals? Morgan avoids the question, saying they need to hammer out a plan for their titular Nerd while Ellie just looks like she wants to stab him with her frosting knife. Poor Chuck. The entire time they bicker, he looks like he’s being tortured.
Meanwhile, over in Casa di Casey… he’s all settled in (with fuckin’ creepy pictures of Chuck and everyone in his life) and talking to Beckman and Graham over the computer. And Sarah’s there, as well. Beckman tells the spy duo that this mission is of utmost importance; La Ciudad is the most dangerous arm’s dealer in the world. Wow. Chuck is pretty lucky to have his first really big Intersect…file…thing, since being told it’s staying put, end up being the most dangerous arm’s dealer in the entire world. Anyway.
The last anyone heard, MI-6 in London had the drop on him. So that means English man is either La Ciudad or he’s with MI-6. Sarah tells her bosses that if Ciudad does show up, they’ll just take him down then and there at the auction. But! The plot thickens. No one in the CIA or NSA has any idea what he looks like. Everyone who’s encountered him, well, they’ve met a sticky end.
If you don’t know what this is…you’re probably sane
Casey decides that they should bring the Intersect. “The subject,” “the Intersect”…Casey, he has a name! Sarah looks at him like he just suggested they strip and make love like wild boars. And, to be honest, Casey’s face looks like that's what he was thinking…
But what he really means is that all the intel they had on Ciudad is in the Intersect. But Sarah is adamant that it’s too dangerous; after all, Chuck has no field experience or training ‘cause he’s, ya’ know, a normal person and not a spy. Casey is, as usual, grumpy as he insists Chuck will be fine; it’s just an art auction. Oh, Casey…
Meanwhile, Chuck is parked on the couch, reading the latest edition of PC Gamer as Morgan and Ellie are still talking about his future. Morgan insists that it’s too soon for Chuck to leave the Buy More but Ellie is certain that his place in life is not the Buy More (yup, they keep saying “the” Buy More. It sounds good. I mean, if you said “the Best Buy” people would look at you like you’re crazy but, like I said, it flows *shrug*). Chuck just noms on a cupcake and keeps reading.
Morgan says Chuck is still a gelding; the world will crush him. Ellie pwns his ass, “Do you know what a gelding is?” And Chuck looks over at his little buddy expectantly. This is what Morgan thinks a gelding is
This is what a gelding actually is. Oh, Morgan.
Moving on…Casey insists that Chuck will be fine; Ciudad probably won’t even show. But Sarah still isn’t convinced it’s worth the risk if he does show up. Beckman decides that it is, in fact, worth it; they won’t know what Chuck’s capable of until he’s tested. So, no safe, inside-a-facility-with-training-stuff kind of test, then? H’okie dokie. Now Devon is in on the “Chuck’s future” plan and, of course, his idea is something high octane and jock-like. Chuck needs something dangerous, some kind of brush with his immortality. Say…class 5 white water rapids, just the two of them? And he kind of puts his arm around Chuck.
That sounds great but unfortunately, Chuck’s wetsuit is at the dry cleaners (he gets off the couch XD I guess Devon made him uncomfortable?). Ellie and Morgan think it’s a horrible idea; it’s way too dangerous and Morgan is not comfortable with Chuck and Devon hanging out. Ellie, fi-na-lly, brings Chuck in on the topic, asking him what he wants to do. He’s just gonna’ hit the sack. And with that, he bids goodnight to “Team Bartowski.” Aw, Chuck, I feel ya’, buddy.
Chuck turns his light on and jumps twenty feet out of his skin. Granted, I probably would’ve screamed like a banshee if I were greeted by this
Seriously, this man is fuckin’ creepy
Casey tells Chuck that he has his first mission tomorrow night and Chuck looks like he might’ve just soiled himself. And cue THE AWESOME NEW OPENING CREDITS THAT I AM CAPPING!
:D :D :D
I wouldn’t have picked this song for the show but it’s oddly fitting. Yup, that needed to be said. Also, this show has long teasers (the stuff before the credits).
We come back to the next day at the Buy More and Chuck is following Casey, asking about appropriate attire. But they’ve got him covered; they ordered him a tuxedo (it’s the US government, they can find out anything about a person, including clothing and shoe size…or Casey just checked the suit in Chuck’s closet why is he so creepy in this episode!?). Seeing as it’s his first fore into spy work, Chuck would appreciate it if Casey eased up on the sarcasm just a tad… They get back to business, Chuck asks how he’s supposed to know who La Ciudad is; is there a picture he can look at beforehand? Casey snarks back that if they had a picture, they wouldn’t need Chuck. And Chuck reminds him of what they just talked about and I laugh. Casey apologizes and explains that they hope that something at the event triggers a flash.
Now: tangent time. The fact that they randomly decide to not only give the experience Chuck has when he sees Intersect data a name, but to just casually throw it in as if it’s not only been used since day one, but has also been previously explained…could fail miserably and leave people confused. But! And this is an awesome “but” (get your mind outta’ there), they pull it off without a hitch. I don’t even blink when Casey says it; you just get what it means right away. Kudos, Chuck, kudos.
So, since now Chuck knows his whole reason for being there is to flash, he wants to know if there’s some kind of hand-to-hand combat skill tutorial Casey could run through. You know, in case something with Ciudad comes down to some fisticuffs (I love that he actually used that word). But Casey assures Chuck that he’ll be absolutely fine…that is…assuming he knows how to tango. Chuck just looks at him like he’s crazy…and like he just said he’s going to kick his puppy. He asks Casey if he’s being serious and Casey responds, “Oh, I don’t joke about your life” with a, well, serious expression and tone. But just before he walks away, he barely smirks…and I grin like an idiot.
Big Mike reminds Chuck, silently and from afar, that the clock is ticking on those broken computers. But before Chuck can really do anything, Morgan pops up and tells him Sarah is in the building. Chuck tells her to wait a minute; he’s got computers to fix. But Anna and Lester got it and there’s only a few left. They’re cool with it, Chuck just has to cover for Lester next time he has a big date. Something tells me that’s not going to be any time soon. And with that, Chuck heads off with Sarah.
Outside the Wienerlicious, Sarah goes over the basic idea of a cover identity. Keep it as simple as possible without revealing true personal details. She asks if Chuck’s thought of a name and he has: Charles Carmichael. It has a very nice ring to it, if I may say. Chuck echoes my thoughts; it’s simple, dignified and, as Sarah points out, easy to remember and not far off from - but Chuck starts going on about Carmichael’s life. He graduated with honors from Stanford, runs a hugely successful software company, and is retired. And he’s thinking about entering America’s Cup. Aw, Chuck…Sarah points out that it’s pretty specific for something off the cuff. But Chuck tells her that when he first got to Stanford, Carmichael is where Chuck envisioned himself ending up at this point in his life. Except for the sailing part, he doesn’t really know where that came from.
Please stop being so God damn lovable
Sarah asks what happened at college and Chuck finally explains what exactly did happen to get him expelled. Senior year, Bryce found stolen tests under Chuck’s bed and alerted administration. After a moment of thought, Sarah asks if he did steal them, but, you know, if the way that she already knows he’ll say “yes.” He, naturally, is pretty offended but more in a playful way than hurt. Everyone makes mistakes, yes, and Chuck has made plenty in his life, but that wasn’t one of them. But, hey! Then Bryce sent him the Intersect, which is locked away in his brain, keeping him in a constant state of fear, danger, and anxiety so, Chuck figures they’re pretty even.
Sarah ignores Chuck’s comments (it’s nice to see how he’s coping with the situation) and tells him he has no reason to be nervous about tonight, she won’t leave his side. He tries to play it cool but Sarah points out that his hand is a little moist. It does that when he’s freakin’ out. I think Sarah really likes him; she always smiles after everything he says.
See
That was a really nice little scene between the two of them. We got some exposition, sure, but it was for Sarah’s benefit as well as the audiences, so it didn’t feel forced. We also got to see how the two of them are starting to interact; even though they have an asset/handler relationship, they feel much more like peers than Chuck and Casey. Plus, it helps that they have some serious chemistry, more than most TV couples, even if they’re only pretending to date.
Later that night, Chuck casually asks Ellie if she knows how to tango (I love the way he asks it. It’s the perfect tone of “Uuuuuuuhhhhhhh, I kinda’ wanna’ know this but I’m not gonna’ tell you whyyyyy *embarrassed*”). She doesn’t, and, of course, she asks why. He lies and says it might come up on his date tonight. Ellie is thrilled to see him reaching outside of his comfort zone. Chuck quips that his comfort zone extends to the end of their couch, so new territory was bound to come up. Enter Captain Awesome, lightly moist and wearing nothing but a towel. He heard someone say “tango.” Chuck immediately says no and that he'll look it up online (and midsentence he finally looks at him) and would Devon please put on somethi-a robe or something?!. And my heart sings with joy as I laugh.
Captain Awesome shares that he spent many a night tangoing his way into senorita’s pantalones during a semester in Buenos Aires. So it’s decided then. Cue the montage!
This scene. Oh, my God, this scene! Chuck’s reactions to Devon as they dance are killing me, as is how seriously Devon is taking the lesson. This is paired with Chuck getting ready (complete with clip-on tie. I love how he struggles to get it on) and Sarah and Casey getting ready. Again, we’re shown the two worlds clashing and mirroring each other in small ways. And we’re shown that Casey has a bonsai tree. Holy hell, this scene is sheer brilliance. The music, the acting, the direction, everything comes together to make a montage, well, more than just a montage. It’s two of the most fun minutes I’ve seen on TV, without a single line of dialogue, in some time.
Meanwhile, back at the Buy More, Lester is on the last computer they have to fix. To make it more fun, the Nerds have blindfolded him and are timing how long it takes. Anna is convinced he won’t break the two-minute record but before he can really start, Tang and the Green Shirts (I think I just came up with an awesome band name) bring in a cart full of more broken PCs. Tang wants to know where Chuck is and Morgan, perched outside the cage with a magazine, tells him the truth like it’s “no biggie.” I guess he forgot he was talking to Tang. But he just snarks back and leaves them to deal with the problem. Lester finishes all smiles and smugness and then he takes off his blindfold. Ouch. He asks what the computers are and all Morgan says is, in a whisper no less, “Tang.” This. Episode. &hearts.
Our spy trio arrives at the auction and Sarah gives Chuck a gift while they’re still in the limo. It’s a watch with a GPS tracking device so they’ll always know where he is. Even though he’s a high priority intelligence asset for the United States government, it’s still kind of creepy. Especially because she doesn’t say any of what I just did, she just says, “so you can’t run away from me.” H’okay then. If he flashes on anyone, he’s to tell Sarah immediately and then just stay out of the way.
He puts the watch on and Casey reminds him (from the driver’s seat XD Poor, Casey) that this is serious; no one’s who seen Ciudad has seen the beginning of the episode and heard why already. That puts the fear into Chuck a bit and he gets all rambly and nervous. Casey reminds him that as long as he knows how to tango he’ll be fine. Sarah looks pretty pissed off as she asks Casey why in the hell Chuck would need to know how to tango but I’m guessing she’s thinking they’ve developed some kind of code without telling her (judging by her, “Is that code?” that she practically spits out at them). Chuck says no, that Casey told him to learn how to tango and Sarah immediately smiles while Casey starts to laugh. Chuck looks like he wants to crawl back into his shell like a turtle. But instead, they exit the limo and head inside.
Over at the Buy More, the Nerd Herd have decided to screw the stupid computer-fixing and are heading home. Morgan tries to stop them but Lester has his Bar Mitzvah lesson, Anna has Internet Poker, and Jeff is off by 8:00 and hammered by 8:05. I love how this little team is getting quirkier by the minute. Morgan reminds them that they owe Chuck because tonight he’s going boldly where none of them have ever gone before - to have intercourse with a beautiful woman. Jeff and Lester stare sadly into the distance while Anna replies, “Speak for yourself.” And, of course, suddenly the group is very interested on what she has to say.
But they’re leaving. And then Morgan drops the big one: if they don’t finish, Tang gets the assistant manager job. That’s all he needed to say. Morgan tries to fist pump Lester as they head back but Lester bites his head off, “Don’t touch me”, Anna blows him off, so then he smacks Jeff’s ass. Morgan is actually really making me laugh tonight.
Back at the auction, Chuck and Sarah are heading upstairs when Chuck sees an hors d'œuvre plate and decides to grab a snack. Naturally, he ends up spilling sauce on his shirt (miraculously it’s on the part covered up by the jacket. I guess it was the make filming the scene a little easier). Great, he’s only been a spy for 5 seconds and he’s already messing up. Sarah tells him to go clean it up and to stop saying he’s a spy. But she says it with a smile on her face so I’m guessing she’s more amused than annoyed.
In the men’s room, Chuck manages to get most of it out before he’s joined by Polite English Man from the episode’s teaser. Chuck takes one look at him through the mirror and flashes, seeing the painting and the file on La Ciudad. He blinks it off and continues to stare for a moment but PEM looks at him (not through the mirror) and asks if they know each other. Chuck tries to play it cool but is definitely nervous as he lies to him and PEM immediately follows him out of the bathroom. Chuck meets up with Sarah, still on the stairs, and tells her he found La Ciudad. Now, I know Chuck isn’t a spy so he doesn’t really know how to look anything but obvious but Sarah has years of experience and training. So why does she react the exact same way Chuck does while Ciudad is staring at them from the bottom of the staircase?
They head upstairs and Chuck questions why they’re still there if the mission was just to identify Ciudad. Sarah, of course, ignores him and tells him to go wait at the bar, walking away before he can object. But he goes to the bar and if offered a drink by the bar tender.
Oh, Casey. First the limo driver and now the barman. I hope you get better cover jobs in the future.
Chuck snarks that he’d like a martini, shaken and stirred. But Casey just pours him a club soda (or Pelligrino…same thing *shrug*) and throws a cherry in just to make him feel all the more belittled. As soon as Casey throws the cherry in the glass, someone recognizes Chuck. Chuck looks to Casey then back at the man and says that, no, his name is Carmichael but the guy cuts him off, “Allan Waterman! :D Stanford? :D” leaving Chuck no other option but to sit there and chitchat. They do and Waterman brags about well his life turned out before asking Chuck what he’s up to. Chuck says he’s weighing his options and makes the assistant manager position at the Buy More sound a thousand times more prestigious than it is (and doesn’t mention the words “buy” or “more”). And he points out his date. But his timing couldn’t be worse because Sarah is busy trying to seduce Ciudad.
Nice
Waterman gives Chuck his card, all smug and douche-like, and Chuck instantly flashes on it (and he keeps making that face! :D XD). Once again, we get Intersect inconsistency for plot. The second the flash ends, Chuck says what knowledge he’s gained out loud, “Insider trading and offshore accounts in the…Cayman’s…” Alan is freaked the fuck out, thinking Chuck works for the FCC, and takes his card back and books it. And I smile.
Back at the Buy More, the team is sitting around, eating pizza and talking about…surprise, Chuck. Lester and Jeff think Sarah’s an escort; there’s no other way Chuck could land a girl that hot. But Anna, rationally, I suppose, says there’s no way because if she were, Chuck wouldn’t be able to afford her. Morgan tells the gang to get back to work, grabbing a busted computer from in front of the cage door on his way in. As the door starts to close, Anna jumps up, in slow-motion to try and stop it, “Noooooo!” But she’s too late. Lester laughs as Jeff stares in disbelief and Morgan is just confused.
Turns out that the lock on the cage is broken. Morgan, now a shade paler, tells them to go get the key, but no can do the kingdom and I aren’t exactly “simpatico” at the moment… - only two people have the key. Tang and…Chuck. Now Morgan is hyperventilating and the team heads out the door. Now Morgan is screaming at the top of his lungs for someone to help him, mainly Chuck.
But Chuck is too busy chugging sparkling water at the bar. As Casey pours him another drink, he notices La Ciudad and one of his men walking away with Sarah…with a gun to her back. He literally hops over the bar in pursuit, telling Chuck to stay. And as I’m saying, “Why do they keep telling him to ‘stay’? He’s not a d-,” Chuck says, “Stay? Stay? Like a dog…” Awesome.
So Ciudad and his goon lead Sarah down the stairs with Casey quickly in tow. Chuck, because he’s awesome, doesn’t stay at the bar but instead stands up and looks around. Though he’s still close to the bar. During his scoping, he eyes the painting and flashes. After he comes out of it, he decides to take a closer look at the infamous painting but, judging from the close-up shot of the corner, I’m guessing he’s focusing on the frame. As I finish that thought, a woman’s voice sounds, “Beautiful painting.” Chuck looks over at his new company and his eyes bug out slightly as he says, “Yeah, beautiful” (complete with looking her up and down).
She is pretty
And then he gets nervous and talks about Bob Ross XD After he finishes his babbling, the woman introduces herself, Malena. Chuck introduces himself as Chuck but immediately catches himself, switching it to Charles, Charles Carmichael (and he puts on this great voice and expression as he says it). They get to talking about the painting; Malena seems surprised that Chuck doesn’t like it. But, no, no, it seems lovely, he’s just more interested in the frame. As soon as the word “frame” leaves his mouth, she eyes him suspiciously…and I immediately get where this headed.
Before either of them can continue, Chuck’s phone rings; it’s Morgan. Chuck, not knowing his little buddy is fearing for his sanity, ignores the call. And he pretends that it’s some important call from his software company. Oh, Chuck. But Malena brings the conversation back to the frame (yup…I know exactly where this is headed. And it’s kind of awesome). But Chuck brushes it off and the two of them share a toast. Though Chuck looks like he’s about to shit himself.
I love the faces they make XD
Meanwhile, Casey is heading to the roof, gun in hand. He stumbles into the middle of an interrogation. Ciudad (*tries not to giggle*) demands to know who Sarah works for but she stays silent, ever the professional. And the sultry, Spanish music kicks in. Turns out it’s not just background noise, it’s also playing at the auction. Malena gets pretty damn excited, saying she loves a tango to which Chuck agrees, after all, who doesn’t? She immediately asks is he really does and he pales. She looks at him like a lioness looks at a baby zebra (or a foal, for those who are in the know ;]) but he figures, what the hell? He learned it so he might as well put it to use.
Ciudad continues to ask Sarah questions but she remains silent and now she’s seen Casey. And this is when this scene starts to make me smile like a fiend. Malena wiggles her finger to Chuck all, “c’mere” and they walk to each other, lifting a leg all dramatic-dancer-like in the process. I would cap it but it really doesn’t translate well to still. So I guess I’ll gif it.
Da daaa
They stand in front of each other, ready to dance, and Malena puts her hand on Chuck’s shoulder…and Chuck immediately does the same. And I crack up. She points out that his hand is supposed to be on her hip. Chuck’s smile becomes a more knowing one as he tells her that apparently he learned the girl’s part of this dance. And I’m doubled over laughing. Oh, Captain Awesome, you just got major points in my book for unknowingly doing that (he means well XD). Chuck asks if Malena would mind leading and she replies, again looking like a lioness, “Not at all.”
On the roof, Casey crashes the party and throws Sarah an extra gun while she takes out Ciudad and his goon. They end up in a standoff (though Sarah’s lying on her back on the ground) and Casey tells them they’re Federal agents and they’d better not move. Meanwhile, Chuck and Malena begin their tango. And it’s…amazing. The way they dance is so over-the-top that it’s hysterical. I almost want to screw capping it and just link to a video because it’s that damn funny.
So, Ciudad tells our spy duo that they’re international agents with MI-6. Sarah yells for them to drop their weapons and they do, all while Chuck continues his dance with “Malena.” PEM is telling the truth while “Malena” pulls Chuck in close, his back to her, and starts stroking his chest. Turns out PEM has been pursuing an arm’s dealer through 5 countries. Casey fills in the blank, La Ciudad. MalenawhoistotallynotCiudad strokes Chuck’s shoulders (still with his back to her) and he looks like he just had way too much fun XD Then he looks almost angry as he grabs her ass.
MI-6 intercepted the painting and found plutonium hidden in the frame so they figured rather than announce it, they’d remove the plutonium and keep the auction going as a way to draw Ciudad out. Sarah wonders aloud where Ciudad is if PEM isn’t him. Cut immediately to Malenadad pulling Chuck in for the finishing move. He looks pretty damn thrilled as she dips him (he just tangoed! Yay! I guess is what he’s thinking?) but then he looks up at her, getting a nice view of the giant scar on her neck. It triggers a flash and he discovers…dun dun dunnnnn! She’s La Ciudad!!!! I love his quiet little “help” before it cuts to a commercial.
Well. That was just a fun as the montage. The way they intercut the amazing dance with the awesome spy work is just another example of how well the show handles the juggling act of tones and worlds. While the “reveal” of La Ciudad was predictable, it was handled so well that I can’t complain. Also, I kind of love that the whole time they were assuming Ciudad was a man when, in fact, she’s a woman. Call me a feminist, but I think that is brilliant (and, sadly, probably likely to happen in real life; the assuming, I mean). And it also sets up that the Intersect isn’t 100% infallible. Awesome sequence, Tango, well done.
We come back to the Buy More and it turns out our Nerds haven’t left Morgan after all. They’re just playing video games while he’s having panic attacks. Now he’s on the phone with the hotel that’s housing the auction. A woman from the hotel finds Chuck as Morgan hilariously describes Chuck (seriously, he’s really growing on me in this episode. Go, writers! I say that because I don’t blame Josh Gomez; he does the best with what he’s given and tonight he’s given gold). The thing that stands out to me in his description is that he says Chuck is 6’1”. Upon hearing that, I do my research, because there is no way he’s only 6’1”…he’s 6’4”. I wonder why the writers would want to make everyone seem shorter. Oh, well, moving on.
Chuck, now nervous as fuck and showing it, asks Ciudad what line of work she’s in and she wants to know why he’s so interested. He says he’s just making conversation and, of course, she doesn’t believe him. Before she can vocalize her doubts, Hotel Lady comes over and asks if he’s Chuck Bartowski. Oh, TV timing. Chuck vehemently denies that he’s Bartowski but Morgan hears his voice through the phone and starts screaming for him. Ciudad looks just about sick of this little dance (see what I did there?) and Chuck tries to walk away from her. Oh, Chuck, haven’t you learned anything from movies? He barely makes it ten feet away when a giant (and I mean giant)
See
goon cuts him off. A smaller, though still giant (he is Zac’s height, after all) goon gets him from behind, gun at his back, and Ciudad escorts the trio to her room, in order to find out who Chuck really is as Sarah and Casey bolt up the stairs.
Over at the Buy More, the Nerds decide to call it a night and Morgan…poor, Morgan. He’s sitting, cradling his knees, on top of the table, rocking back and forth. The trio leaves him, Anna being the nicest about it, and he freaks out (especially when they kill the lights). Sarah and Casey head back to the main room for the auction and try to find Chuck. When they don’t, they run out to explore the hotel.
Chuck, however, is stashed away in a room, tied to a chair. Also, they took off his jacket for some reason. Ciudad starts with an easy question: his real name. He insists that it’s Charles Carmichael. Ciudad grabs a huge knife and throws it straight at his balls, just missing them. Chuck immediately responds, “Chuck Bartowski…!” and I laugh. Ciudad’s eyes light up as she approaches him. She leans in seductively as she removes the knife from the chair and tells Chuck that before he answers her next question, she wants him to think long and hard about her options.
Poor Chuck, his brain must be so confused right now. On the one hand, he’s got a beautiful woman reaching for his genitalia and practically sitting on his lap talking about things that are long and hard. On the other, she’s got a huge knife and is planning on torturing him. He doesn’t seem to be though as he cowers in fear (as any sane person would, even with the subconscious confusion).
She weighs her options aloud. She could yank out a tooth; too noisy. She could cut off a toe; too messy. Or she could chuck him off the balcony (and she finishes it off with a “Chuck” to make it funny). He’d land face first, his teeth going through the back of his head. She winces, telling him it’s not a good way to go. The entire time she talks, she keeps moving the knife around his face in a threatening manner, practically taunting him. Going from the pathetic man that was Zarnow to this just makes my heart so happy.
Though Chuck looks less than thrilled
So, her question: who does he work for? He swears that he doesn’t work for anybody. Cue the goons. They lift up the chair and start walking to the window. Chuck yells that he fixes computers for a living and he just snuck into the party under a fake name to impress a girl, “please put chair down!” Go, Chuck! Even in that situation, he’s able to think fast and come up with a believable cover story. But Ciudad ain’t buyin’ it. Just before the goons are going to chuck him, he yells out that it’s a setup. Now he’s got her attention. She asks what he’s talking about, so he tells her it’s the painting. I love how her goons turn him around so he can face her while he talks XD
He says that he thinks the painting is a fake because the picture he saw of it in the paper had a different frame (though during his spiel he bargains with her to have the goons put him down. Smart man, Chuck), meaning someone must have swapped it out and she shouldn’t buy it. She seems to believe him as he jokes about his lack of painting-buying budget. But she pulls a gun on him and asks how to fix a computer.
Meanwhile, Chuck’s handlers are in the hall, tracking his watch. Cut back to Chuck as he answers Ciudad’s question. Now, I’m just gonna’ type what he says because, well, yeah: “My first inclination is that your bus speed is not up to snuff with your video card. I’m assuming we’re talking about a PC here, right? Is your memory dedicated?” He sounds completely confident and sure of himself (and not the slightest bit afraid, I might add).
Ciudad lowers her gun, telling him that she believes him. Just as he breathes a gigantic sigh of relief, she tells him the problem she’s facing. Since Chuck’s seen her, he’s got to die anyway. He vehemently (as he says) disagrees as she puts the silencer on her gun. Sarah and Casey are just around the corner when they spy a goon. Ciudad promises Chuck that it will be fast and that she enjoyed their tango. Casey and Sarah come round the corner, holding hands and giggling (and Casey says, “I don’t like it that much though, he was kind of silly :D” and I’m struck by how great it is too see him grin like that, seeing as he’s gorgeous).
Just as they finish their little conversation, Sarah kicks the goon in the knees. Ciudad hears it from inside the room and starts shooting the door. Her goons fire as well while she heads for the window. And Chuck rocks back and forth is his seat while he screams…H’okay. Ciudad jumps out the window and we cut to Waterman, panicking while he tells Shelly, over the phone, that the FCC is onto them, I mean, they know about the Cayman’s! Just when his voice reaches maximum shrill, Ciudad throws a patio table though his door, breaking the glass. He falls to the floor in terror and throws his arms in the air, surrendering. And I wipe away tears of joy and laughter. Ciudad just ignores him and runs.
Chuck keeps screaming and rocking back and forth as the goons ignore him and jump out the window. And his chair topples over to the floor from all the rocking. I’m assuming the goons out of ammo and that’s why they just leave him? Yup, just as one of them tries to shoot from the balcony (yay for logical actions!), he hears that familiar “click” of bulletlessness. Chuck calls for Sarah to help (why does he never call for Casey?) and they kick the door down and start shooting the place to all hell, landing a shot at the remaining goon. As he falls to his death, we see him fly past Waterman’s window. And Waterman, still on the floor with his hands up, yells, “Oh, my God!”
I LOVE. THIS. EPISODE (poor Waterman XD)
Sarah runs to Chuck’s side while Casey checks the balcony. She asks if he’s okay and Chuck’s a little freaked out, understandably. Casey asks if Chuck told them anything and he’s offended, “Of course not!” Casey considers Chuck lucky to be alive. But La Ciudad isn’t quite as happy. Her remaining goon says they need to leave the country. But first, Ciudad insists (as she shows him the ID she stole), they need to take Chuck out.
We come back from a commercial to find that Chuck’s getting back home and that Ellie slept on the couch in the hopes of catching him. He covers her with a blanket (♥) and she wakes up, asking him how the date went. He quickly says it was “good, great, fine” and he’s going to bed and he loves her (d’awww). But Ellie isn’t satisfied. She pulls him back and makes him join her on the couch. Chuck is very vague, not giving much, but he says that Sarah is too exhausting for him. So, naturally, Ellie asks what happened; did they tango? Oh, yeah, they tangoed. And Chuck tells Ellie that Awesome (sans “Captain”, I like it) taught him the girl’s part, so it was a little difficult.
Cue Awesome, in nothing but boxers, asking Chuck if he did the famous dip. Chuck was on the receiving end of the dip, which prompts Awesome to ask if Chuck tangoed with a woman. And on that note…But Ellie stops him from leaving once more. He looks upset and she looks doubly so, practically on the verge of tears as she asks her brother why he won’t talk to her.
My knee jerk reaction is wondering why she’s so crushed but then I realize…they’ve really only had each other. Going from the “Dad quote” in the Pilot, to “Dad’s suit” in Helicopter, to Ellie’s maternal treatment of Chuck…they’re so close that they share everything with each other, because they’re all each other must have had for so long, that now for Chuck to be so quiet about a date, of all things…it makes perfect sense for Ellie to be that gutted (and, yes, I swear that I really was thinking all this during my first time around. The writers aren’t explicit about the details of their parents, but they’ve given just enough that you get that they weren’t around very much at all, and certainly not at all now).
Chuck tells her that it’s complicated and to just let it go. The words may sound harsh, but he says it as though he’s really trying not to hurt her feelings. To go from the auction, a fun, fast-paced, dangerous sequence to this is just… Ooooh, I love this show. Ellie gives up, saying that if he won’t talk to her, maybe he’ll talk to Morgan. The guy called about 75 times; he locked himself in a storage cage.
Mozart’s Sull’aria begins to play as we transition to Morgan in various positions in the cage, ala The Shawshank Redemption. Finally, he’s woken up by the smell of a slice of a pizza. He jumps back, startled, to find that Chuck has come to bail him out (still in his tux). He gives Morgan the pizza and asks what happened. Morgan tells him all about Tang and offers to help, after all, never leave your wingman. But Chuck assures him that it’s fine and he should go sleep. Morgan insists but Chuck tells him it’ll be nice to do something he’s actually go at, though he appreciates the offer. And Morgan splits (a little too quickly for my liking after that sincere moment they just shared).
Cue the awesome Band Of Horses song as Chuck gets started and we fast forward to the following morning. Big Mike shows up for work to find that Chuck has, indeed, finished the job. Two days was only meant as incentive, he didn’t think Chuck would actually pull it off; he’s impressed. And he’s not a man easily impressed. Though, judging by the brilliant expression he gives his danish, I’d say those impress him just fine.
But Chuck tells him that only fixed the last few; his team did most of them so they deserve the credit. Big Mike shares the first rule of management with him: always take the credit. Tang busts in with all the beers Chuck’s team drank the night before. But Big Mike could care less, so long as Chuck keeps it out of the store from now on. And he gets extra points for style.
He is lookin’ sharp
Tang grunts as he tells Chuck he looks like a waiter. And he drops the cans on the floor for him to clean up, calling him a kiss ass. I hate that man (but I love to hate him). Meanwhile, Morgan tells the tale of his night of horror and how brave he was during it all. Aaand he’s pressing charges; the cage is a major fire hazard.
Casey catches up to Chuck (still in his tux) and compliments him on his work last night. But Chuck isn’t in the mood for his shit; he’s working on an all-nighter so he’d appreciate it if Casey eased up on the sarcasm. But Casey was being sincere, because of Chuck they now what she looks like, they have a blood sample, and they know that she’s heading to Central America. And Chuck’s lookin’ sharp. Just as Chuck thanks him, Casey tells him that that was facetious. And he calls him an idiot.
Later that day, Chuck is back in uniform as he gives a customer their fixed computer from behind the front desk. As the happy customer heads out the door, two giants (one of them Ciudad’s remaining goon, the other a new goon) bump past him. Chuck spots them and falls to the floor to hide. No, really, he just drops on the spot, it’s amazing. So, he hides as they search the floor. Casey spots them from the HEET Wall (the wall of TVs; that’s what it’s called >_>; ) and goes into spy mode, following them.
Meanwhile, Tang finds Chuck and thinks he’s avoiding work. Chuck asks him to go away but Tang says he will never go away. When Chuck goes to sleep at night, all he’ll see “is Tang in [his] face.” And Chuck’s reaction says it all.
Goon number 1 finds Tang and asks where he can find Chuck Bartowski. But by the time Tang turns back to the desk, Chuck’s already gone. Goon 1 gives up and moves on. Outside, Ciudad is disguised as a delivery woman. She heads over to the Wienerlicious, seeing as it’s right across from the Buy More, and passes by Sarah, lunch in hand and heading to the Buy More. Sarah glances at Ciudad and notices her giant (completely different looking than before…) scar. The tango music from earlier is playing over their interaction and it’s a great decision. The pair stop and scope each other out for a moment before heading on their respective ways. And a new tango has begun.
Sarah ducks behind the delivery truck and tells Casey, through her watch, that they have company. But he’s already on it. Chuck, now hiding out behind Customer Service, pages himself over the P.A, requesting his presence at the storage cage. Goon 2 asks Casey where the storage cage is and he happily obliges, leading him through the store.
Meanwhile, Sarah spots Ciudad on the roof of the Wienerlicious and heads over. Chuck comes out of hiding to see Goon 1 with Morgan, who’s pointing over at Chuck. Oh, Morgan, if only you knew. Chuck panics and crawls away while Ciudad opens up a giant box on the roof. She pulls out the components of a sniper rifle and begins assembling it while Sarah ascends the latter to the roof.
Back at the Buy More, Casey has lead Goon 2 to the refrigerators, telling him about a big sale they’re having. But G2 doesn’t want to hear it. He pulls a gun on Casey and demands to know where Chuck is. Casey grabs him the wrist, disabling him. G2 tries to retaliate with a punch but Casey head butts his fist. They scuffle and Casey drops him into a freezer. Wow, Casey is one badass mother fucker. Who else could punch a man’s fist with his face and win?
On the roof, Sarah approaches Ciudad, thinking she has the upper hand but Ciudad spins around, trying to hit Sarah with the gun. Sarah deflects it and Ciudad kicks her in the face. Sarah glares up at her as she wipes the blood from her mouth. And the hand-to-hand combat commences... But first we go back to Chuck. He’s still crawling, though now he’s made it to the storage cage. He hides under the desk just as G1 comes in. When he checks the cage for Chuck, Chuck jumps up and slams the door. Victory! And then G1 opens the door… Chuck looks petrified as he recalls how broken the door was earlier that day. G1 pulls a gun on him and he makes the best face ever.
And then I shot “OOOOOHHHHHH!” as a microwave collides with G1’s face in the most awesome way I’ve ever seen.
Casey quickly shows up, offering up a one liner so cheesy, Ahnuld wouldn’t go near it, “Now that’s what I call movin’ some merchandise, yeah?” But it makes me laugh so hard (as did the little chime of the microwave coinciding with Chuck looking to the goon). Casey drags him away as Chuck agrees, although it sounds more like a random sound given his fear.
Back on the roof, the badassery continues as Sarah and Ciudad duke it out. Ciudad comes this close to drop-kicking Sarah in the face twice. Then she comes this close to shoving Sarah’s face on some loose…nails…? I don’t know, but it’s badass and scary. Sarah elbows her in the face, twice for good measure, and gets the cuffs ready. But Ciudad pulls out her trusty knife. Sarah manages to kick her ass, well, punch her in the face half a dozen times, finishing it off with the most badass (it's the word of the fight. Seriously though, this fight is pretty damn awesome) of them all. Then she cuffs her to a satellite on the roof and the cheesy lines continue, as she tells the unconscious Ciudad to, “Hang here.” Even Buffy is rolling her eyes now.
Meanwhile, Morgan is at the Nerd Herd desk, talking over the loudspeaker in an hysterical voice, “Uhhh…Charles Irving Bartowski of the Encino Bartowskis, could you please report to the return’s desk. Charles Irving Bartowski.” But Chuck comes over to him instead, asking him what’s up, though he looks pretty annoyed. Morgan says it was nothing, he just loves using that thing and they should get one for Chuck’s apartment and good news, they fixed the-.” And now Chuck has not only unplugged the microphone, but he's walking away with it, “-the lock on the storage cage, so…” and Chuck is gone.
This. Show.
We come back from a word from our sponsors to find the Bartowski residence that night. Chuck strolls into the kitchen while Ellie is cooking. He apologizes for being kind of evasive, it’s just that he didn’t want to lie and he chose not saying anything as the lesser of two evils. Which prompts Ellie to wonder why Chuck would lie to her. But he just needs him to trust her and know that it has nothing to do with her. She thinks he wants her to butt out but he swears that’s not the case. He just doesn’t want to get Ellie excited for his relationship with Sarah when it seems doomed. And it’s doomed because she’s not into him. But Ellie has seen the way that Sarah looks at him and she is definitely into him. The way Chuck’s face lights up when he hears that is brilliant.
But Ellie insists that it’s none of her business. But then Chuck opens the floor; anything Ellie wants to ask, she can. Ellie is pretty happy as she asks, “Do you like her?” Chuck gets all embarrassed as he tells her that he does, and she squees and it’s adorable.
But Chuck makes her calm down, “no unnecessary excitement!” and asks her for another question. But that’s all Ellie needed to know. She doesn’t want to nag him about Sarah, and his future, his job…she doesn’t want to pester him into oblivion. But Chuck assures her that she’s not a pest. It’s just that Ellie knows what an incredible guy Charles Bartowski is and sometimes she’s not so sure that he does. He gets all embarrassed and asks her how’d she feel about a brother/sister hug. She’s open to it. And they embrace. And my heart grows twelve sizes.
Then the doorbell rings. I’m guessing Chuck was expecting to see one of them.
Guess who he wasn’t
Morgan thought they had plans, seeing as Chuck told him he’d see him later, in the normal, “bye” sense of the phrase. Ugh, Morgan, and you were doing so well. But Chuck, being Chuck, invites him in. Sarah hands him the bottle of wine she brought and they exchange a quick cover kiss. He notices her lip and asks if she’s okay. It’s an occupational hazard; sometimes people get in lucky kicks. Sarah, my dear, you are growing on me.
And then this gorgeous song begins to play (and I immediately download The National’s entire discography) as an aerial view of the city showcases the passage of time. Now that the meal is over, Chuck walks Sarah to her car. She congratulates him on doing so well on his first mission. But he tells her to stop; he’s not really a spy. But Sarah points out that he survived a near-death experience, under the threat of torture, and apprehended one of the world’s most elusive killers. Most spies would consider that a pretty good day. That’s all well and good for Chuck but he reminds Sarah that tomorrow he still has to go clock in at Buy More. What’s the good of being a hero is nobody knows about it? But Sarah tells him that he knows. And so does she.
Chuck points out that if they were really dating, this would be the part where he’d be forced to kiss her goodnight. And she points out his use of the word “forced.” But he’s sure he could suffer through it. She is too. They share a lingering gaze of sexual and emotional tension before Sarah turns and walks away, leaving Chuck to watch her depart. And then Morgan slides into the shot and points out how creepy Casey is.
And, holy shit, is he ever
Chuck agrees and Morgan waves to Casey before they head back inside. Before they do though, Chuck still stares into the distance as the lyrics sound, “You know I dreamed about you for twenty-nine years before I saw you.” And I think that that can't be a coincidence (even though Chuck is 26) as the scene fades to black.
And that concludes Chuck Versus the Tango. Wow. Talk about great TV. We got the usual fake-out opening, after the darkest one the show has done yet, but it was still fresh and fun. The characters are all coming into their own, especially Morgan and Casey, and Sarah finally feels like she has a consistent personality, even if it is a little dry. Ellie’s neediness for Chuck didn’t feel quite as annoying as it has in the past and Chuck continues to be charming, endearing, and relatable. The jokes were hilarious, the action was fast-paced and entertaining, La Ciudad was a great villain, and we see that the Intersect can, in fact, get it a little wrong sometimes. We also see the budding romance between handler and asset, as well as the tension Chuck’s double life is starting to put on himself and his loved ones. Not to mention the pop culture references were funny and the music, both score and found, were put to fantastic use. Every cue, every song, elevated the scene. Practically everything about this episode worked on all levels. All around, this was my favorite so far.
Overall, Tango receives an 8.5/10.
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Chuck Versus the Tango
We open on some mediocre painting in Tehran, Iran and a man is critiquing it, basically saying how crap it is.
Or that
Just as he finishes his sentence, BAM! He shoots the man next to him and takes the painting. Two weeks later, we find ourselves in Madrid, and a similar scenario follows, this time with the first man being shot by the “buyer.” Finally, we end up in an art gallery in downtown L.A. where an English man politely tells the seller that his money is on the desk. So, no rude, snarky comments (or subtitles) then. The seller checks that the money is legit and reaches for his gun, but! He’s too late! Polite English Man beat him to it, continuing the cycle after all. And he calls the painting a piece of crap. Awesome.
Cut to one month later, this time in northeast L.A. and Chuck is being held at gunpoint, begging his assailant not to shoot him.
Aaaaand, surprise! It’s a kid! With a video game gun! It’s hardly a surprise that this scene is a fake-out (seeing as the previous two episodes have done the same) but I can’t help but love it as much as the other two. I guess I’m a sucker for a well executed, albeit predictable, fake-out. The music immediately changes tone to some smooth Spoon and we see that Chuck is helping this kid get the toy gun to work properly.
And more evidence of Zac Levi’s relation to the Jolly Green Giant
The kid is upset that the gun is busted but Chuck tells him that for Mr. Bartowski, “busted is just a state of mind.” Holy. Crap. I really can’t remember the last time I fell for a character so quickly. He is the very definition of endearing. A couple of quick tweaks later and the gun is working perfectly. Tang interrupts, Big Mike wants to see Chuck but he blows Tang off. And he calls the kid “sir.” Literally a second later, Big Mike is right behind him and he’s not happy. Chuck immediately tells him he was just on his way to see him. And I fall over laughing. Aaand he asks the kid to pause the game. And I start to cry from all the laughing.
Chuck enters Big Mike’s office and - whoa. That is a giant fish O_O Anyway. Big Mike looks pretty serious and Chuck keeps a safe distance between the two of them. After an uncomfortable moment of silence, Biggy Mac asks Chuck what he wants in life. Chuck, as usual, quips back something witty but Big Mike brings the conversation back to the important topic - Buy More. Specifically, where Chuck sees himself at Buy More in 5 to 10 years. I love Chuck’s response, “Honestly...? I have absolutely no idea.”
But Big Mike is prepared. As Chuck knows, there’s an assistant manager position open and right now? It’s down to him and Harry Tang. The question is (and Big Mike asks it), does Chuck want the job? I love how genuine Chuck’s reaction is. He pauses, mulls it over all “is this really what I want in life…?”, for just a second before saying he does; though I’m not sure he’s even fully convinced himself. But it’s enough for Big Mike. If Chuck wants the job, he’s got to show him something.
I think Chuck’s brain went to the same place mine did…
Cut to… a cage? If this is their warehouse, Buy More is worse off than I thought. Anyway. Chuck’s got some bad news for his Nerds. Big Mike wants them to fix the entire cage’s worth of junk (and, holy hell, it’s a lot of junk) in two days or he’s giving the job to Tang. He apologies to everyone, saying “guys” and then addresses the female Nerd, Anna, separately. But “guys” is fine. Chuck, however, think it’s not right; they need something non-gender specific. Maybe team? Fellow Nerd Herders? Lester offers up “the Lesters” and then Jeff, being, well, Jeff offers up something completely out-of-the-box and left-field…drum roll, please… Chuck’s Stable of Hos. Oh, my God, this episode is amazing (though, Helicopter started off well, too).
Morgan comes in and immediately pales and takes in a breath. He heard about the deal and he’s there to help. Only, well… a.) He lacks the skill set and b.) Old computers freak the crap outta’ him. It’s taking him an immense amount of courage just to stand in the doorway (Chuck’s really proud of his little buddy). More importantly, Morgan brings his friend news. His lady is in the building. And she’s looking good.
Without the context, these pictures look very different
Cue the sexy Spanish music and slow-mo as Chuck makes his way to the Nerd Herd desk. Sarah, in her Wienerlicious uniform, of course, is at the front of the store. The cover-couple meet up and Sarah immediately whispers to Chuck to kiss her. Chuck is a bit taken aback but Sarah insists; they’ve been on three dates and they have to sell it. Chuck anxiously eyes the area around them before giving Sarah the most chaste kiss on the cheek any couple has shared, cover or otherwise. But Chuck’s not really good with the PDA. So Sarah decides to take him somewhere more private, like the Home Theater Center.
Chuck looks confused as all hell and Morgan looks thrilled for him, but in the calm, quiet sense of the word (no, I am not being snarky). Casey instantly makes a beeline for the pair but Morgan, thinking it’s a cock block, tries to step in. And Casey does his, I’m hoping, signature move
XD. Poor Morgan
Casey enters the room and the mood immediately drops. But next time Sarah wants to talk to the subject (yeah, you read that right. He just called Chuck “the subject”), she needs to let him in on it. She snarks right back but Chuck interrupts. And calls them mom and dad XD
Sarah lays out pictures of the buyers from a few weeks ago on the table and Chuck, without being asked, takes a look, “Why are these people sleeping?” Oh, Chuck. You really are so innocent, aren’t you? He looks horrified when his handlers shine some light on the subject for him. Not to mention, the Intersect isn’t responding and Chuck would really rather not take a good look at the pictures; they are kinda’ creepy. Before anyone can argue, Jeff pops in, food and newspaper in hand, saying he was going to take a nap and he’ll be back in five. The camera zooms in on the paper and we see the ugly painting has made the cover.
Chuck makes that amazing face (XD) as the Intersect is activated. And now it’s very apparent that they’ve really hammered out the details of how this works. We see a close up of Chuck’s eye as his pupil dilates, an image, a few more images with some very specific information, followed by the same image and Chuck’s eye, his pupil constricting, to close it out.
Like so
And with that, Jeff leaves.
The second he’s gone, Sarah asks what Chuck saw. I guess Intersect face is official then? :D How else would she know? But Chuck’s not 100% certain of what he saw… Water lilies in a painting, an auction and the name La Ciudad (the city? Like, the movie The City?); Chuck thinks he’s going to be at the auction tomorrow night. The minute the words leave his mouth, he tells his handlers he’s going to go fix some hard drives, clearly wanting no part in the “spy stuff.”
Back at home, Ellie is celebrating as if Chuck is already the assistant manager (and she’s decorating cupcakes) but Chuck (after some great sibling interaction; seriously, in the way they interact physically, they are probably the most realistic, convincing siblings I’ve seen in a long time) reminds his older sister that he hasn’t gotten the job yet. And Morgan creepily eyes Ellie again. Upon seeing Chuck’s radiating enthusiasm, Ellie’s hopeful that Chuck is getting tired of the Buy More and will find a real job. Morgan quips and it actually makes me smile (go, Morgan!). Ellie clarifies for the bearded one; Chuck went to Stanford. As Ellie explains her reasoning, Chuck sneaks a cupcake in the background and steals the shot XD
Yup, it was so awesome, it needed to be giffed (giffed? Gifed? I don’t know)
Morgan is well aware of where Chuck matriculated but he reminds Ellie that Chuck was unceremoniously expelled senior year. He hates to bring it up but they have to set some realistic goals, after all. Ellie is getting heated now; is Morgan talking about Chuck’s goals or Morgan’s goals? Morgan avoids the question, saying they need to hammer out a plan for their titular Nerd while Ellie just looks like she wants to stab him with her frosting knife. Poor Chuck. The entire time they bicker, he looks like he’s being tortured.
Meanwhile, over in Casa di Casey… he’s all settled in (with fuckin’ creepy pictures of Chuck and everyone in his life) and talking to Beckman and Graham over the computer. And Sarah’s there, as well. Beckman tells the spy duo that this mission is of utmost importance; La Ciudad is the most dangerous arm’s dealer in the world. Wow. Chuck is pretty lucky to have his first really big Intersect…file…thing, since being told it’s staying put, end up being the most dangerous arm’s dealer in the entire world. Anyway.
The last anyone heard, MI-6 in London had the drop on him. So that means English man is either La Ciudad or he’s with MI-6. Sarah tells her bosses that if Ciudad does show up, they’ll just take him down then and there at the auction. But! The plot thickens. No one in the CIA or NSA has any idea what he looks like. Everyone who’s encountered him, well, they’ve met a sticky end.
If you don’t know what this is…you’re probably sane
Casey decides that they should bring the Intersect. “The subject,” “the Intersect”…Casey, he has a name! Sarah looks at him like he just suggested they strip and make love like wild boars. And, to be honest, Casey’s face looks like that's what he was thinking…
But what he really means is that all the intel they had on Ciudad is in the Intersect. But Sarah is adamant that it’s too dangerous; after all, Chuck has no field experience or training ‘cause he’s, ya’ know, a normal person and not a spy. Casey is, as usual, grumpy as he insists Chuck will be fine; it’s just an art auction. Oh, Casey…
Meanwhile, Chuck is parked on the couch, reading the latest edition of PC Gamer as Morgan and Ellie are still talking about his future. Morgan insists that it’s too soon for Chuck to leave the Buy More but Ellie is certain that his place in life is not the Buy More (yup, they keep saying “the” Buy More. It sounds good. I mean, if you said “the Best Buy” people would look at you like you’re crazy but, like I said, it flows *shrug*). Chuck just noms on a cupcake and keeps reading.
Morgan says Chuck is still a gelding; the world will crush him. Ellie pwns his ass, “Do you know what a gelding is?” And Chuck looks over at his little buddy expectantly. This is what Morgan thinks a gelding is
This is what a gelding actually is. Oh, Morgan.
Moving on…Casey insists that Chuck will be fine; Ciudad probably won’t even show. But Sarah still isn’t convinced it’s worth the risk if he does show up. Beckman decides that it is, in fact, worth it; they won’t know what Chuck’s capable of until he’s tested. So, no safe, inside-a-facility-with-training-stuff kind of test, then? H’okie dokie. Now Devon is in on the “Chuck’s future” plan and, of course, his idea is something high octane and jock-like. Chuck needs something dangerous, some kind of brush with his immortality. Say…class 5 white water rapids, just the two of them? And he kind of puts his arm around Chuck.
That sounds great but unfortunately, Chuck’s wetsuit is at the dry cleaners (he gets off the couch XD I guess Devon made him uncomfortable?). Ellie and Morgan think it’s a horrible idea; it’s way too dangerous and Morgan is not comfortable with Chuck and Devon hanging out. Ellie, fi-na-lly, brings Chuck in on the topic, asking him what he wants to do. He’s just gonna’ hit the sack. And with that, he bids goodnight to “Team Bartowski.” Aw, Chuck, I feel ya’, buddy.
Chuck turns his light on and jumps twenty feet out of his skin. Granted, I probably would’ve screamed like a banshee if I were greeted by this
Seriously, this man is fuckin’ creepy
Casey tells Chuck that he has his first mission tomorrow night and Chuck looks like he might’ve just soiled himself. And cue THE AWESOME NEW OPENING CREDITS THAT I AM CAPPING!
:D :D :D
I wouldn’t have picked this song for the show but it’s oddly fitting. Yup, that needed to be said. Also, this show has long teasers (the stuff before the credits).
We come back to the next day at the Buy More and Chuck is following Casey, asking about appropriate attire. But they’ve got him covered; they ordered him a tuxedo (it’s the US government, they can find out anything about a person, including clothing and shoe size…or Casey just checked the suit in Chuck’s closet why is he so creepy in this episode!?). Seeing as it’s his first fore into spy work, Chuck would appreciate it if Casey eased up on the sarcasm just a tad… They get back to business, Chuck asks how he’s supposed to know who La Ciudad is; is there a picture he can look at beforehand? Casey snarks back that if they had a picture, they wouldn’t need Chuck. And Chuck reminds him of what they just talked about and I laugh. Casey apologizes and explains that they hope that something at the event triggers a flash.
Now: tangent time. The fact that they randomly decide to not only give the experience Chuck has when he sees Intersect data a name, but to just casually throw it in as if it’s not only been used since day one, but has also been previously explained…could fail miserably and leave people confused. But! And this is an awesome “but” (get your mind outta’ there), they pull it off without a hitch. I don’t even blink when Casey says it; you just get what it means right away. Kudos, Chuck, kudos.
So, since now Chuck knows his whole reason for being there is to flash, he wants to know if there’s some kind of hand-to-hand combat skill tutorial Casey could run through. You know, in case something with Ciudad comes down to some fisticuffs (I love that he actually used that word). But Casey assures Chuck that he’ll be absolutely fine…that is…assuming he knows how to tango. Chuck just looks at him like he’s crazy…and like he just said he’s going to kick his puppy. He asks Casey if he’s being serious and Casey responds, “Oh, I don’t joke about your life” with a, well, serious expression and tone. But just before he walks away, he barely smirks…and I grin like an idiot.
Big Mike reminds Chuck, silently and from afar, that the clock is ticking on those broken computers. But before Chuck can really do anything, Morgan pops up and tells him Sarah is in the building. Chuck tells her to wait a minute; he’s got computers to fix. But Anna and Lester got it and there’s only a few left. They’re cool with it, Chuck just has to cover for Lester next time he has a big date. Something tells me that’s not going to be any time soon. And with that, Chuck heads off with Sarah.
Outside the Wienerlicious, Sarah goes over the basic idea of a cover identity. Keep it as simple as possible without revealing true personal details. She asks if Chuck’s thought of a name and he has: Charles Carmichael. It has a very nice ring to it, if I may say. Chuck echoes my thoughts; it’s simple, dignified and, as Sarah points out, easy to remember and not far off from - but Chuck starts going on about Carmichael’s life. He graduated with honors from Stanford, runs a hugely successful software company, and is retired. And he’s thinking about entering America’s Cup. Aw, Chuck…Sarah points out that it’s pretty specific for something off the cuff. But Chuck tells her that when he first got to Stanford, Carmichael is where Chuck envisioned himself ending up at this point in his life. Except for the sailing part, he doesn’t really know where that came from.
Please stop being so God damn lovable
Sarah asks what happened at college and Chuck finally explains what exactly did happen to get him expelled. Senior year, Bryce found stolen tests under Chuck’s bed and alerted administration. After a moment of thought, Sarah asks if he did steal them, but, you know, if the way that she already knows he’ll say “yes.” He, naturally, is pretty offended but more in a playful way than hurt. Everyone makes mistakes, yes, and Chuck has made plenty in his life, but that wasn’t one of them. But, hey! Then Bryce sent him the Intersect, which is locked away in his brain, keeping him in a constant state of fear, danger, and anxiety so, Chuck figures they’re pretty even.
Sarah ignores Chuck’s comments (it’s nice to see how he’s coping with the situation) and tells him he has no reason to be nervous about tonight, she won’t leave his side. He tries to play it cool but Sarah points out that his hand is a little moist. It does that when he’s freakin’ out. I think Sarah really likes him; she always smiles after everything he says.
See
That was a really nice little scene between the two of them. We got some exposition, sure, but it was for Sarah’s benefit as well as the audiences, so it didn’t feel forced. We also got to see how the two of them are starting to interact; even though they have an asset/handler relationship, they feel much more like peers than Chuck and Casey. Plus, it helps that they have some serious chemistry, more than most TV couples, even if they’re only pretending to date.
Later that night, Chuck casually asks Ellie if she knows how to tango (I love the way he asks it. It’s the perfect tone of “Uuuuuuuhhhhhhh, I kinda’ wanna’ know this but I’m not gonna’ tell you whyyyyy *embarrassed*”). She doesn’t, and, of course, she asks why. He lies and says it might come up on his date tonight. Ellie is thrilled to see him reaching outside of his comfort zone. Chuck quips that his comfort zone extends to the end of their couch, so new territory was bound to come up. Enter Captain Awesome, lightly moist and wearing nothing but a towel. He heard someone say “tango.” Chuck immediately says no and that he'll look it up online (and midsentence he finally looks at him) and would Devon please put on somethi-a robe or something?!. And my heart sings with joy as I laugh.
Captain Awesome shares that he spent many a night tangoing his way into senorita’s pantalones during a semester in Buenos Aires. So it’s decided then. Cue the montage!
This scene. Oh, my God, this scene! Chuck’s reactions to Devon as they dance are killing me, as is how seriously Devon is taking the lesson. This is paired with Chuck getting ready (complete with clip-on tie. I love how he struggles to get it on) and Sarah and Casey getting ready. Again, we’re shown the two worlds clashing and mirroring each other in small ways. And we’re shown that Casey has a bonsai tree. Holy hell, this scene is sheer brilliance. The music, the acting, the direction, everything comes together to make a montage, well, more than just a montage. It’s two of the most fun minutes I’ve seen on TV, without a single line of dialogue, in some time.
Meanwhile, back at the Buy More, Lester is on the last computer they have to fix. To make it more fun, the Nerds have blindfolded him and are timing how long it takes. Anna is convinced he won’t break the two-minute record but before he can really start, Tang and the Green Shirts (I think I just came up with an awesome band name) bring in a cart full of more broken PCs. Tang wants to know where Chuck is and Morgan, perched outside the cage with a magazine, tells him the truth like it’s “no biggie.” I guess he forgot he was talking to Tang. But he just snarks back and leaves them to deal with the problem. Lester finishes all smiles and smugness and then he takes off his blindfold. Ouch. He asks what the computers are and all Morgan says is, in a whisper no less, “Tang.” This. Episode. &hearts.
Our spy trio arrives at the auction and Sarah gives Chuck a gift while they’re still in the limo. It’s a watch with a GPS tracking device so they’ll always know where he is. Even though he’s a high priority intelligence asset for the United States government, it’s still kind of creepy. Especially because she doesn’t say any of what I just did, she just says, “so you can’t run away from me.” H’okay then. If he flashes on anyone, he’s to tell Sarah immediately and then just stay out of the way.
He puts the watch on and Casey reminds him (from the driver’s seat XD Poor, Casey) that this is serious; no one’s who seen Ciudad has seen the beginning of the episode and heard why already. That puts the fear into Chuck a bit and he gets all rambly and nervous. Casey reminds him that as long as he knows how to tango he’ll be fine. Sarah looks pretty pissed off as she asks Casey why in the hell Chuck would need to know how to tango but I’m guessing she’s thinking they’ve developed some kind of code without telling her (judging by her, “Is that code?” that she practically spits out at them). Chuck says no, that Casey told him to learn how to tango and Sarah immediately smiles while Casey starts to laugh. Chuck looks like he wants to crawl back into his shell like a turtle. But instead, they exit the limo and head inside.
Over at the Buy More, the Nerd Herd have decided to screw the stupid computer-fixing and are heading home. Morgan tries to stop them but Lester has his Bar Mitzvah lesson, Anna has Internet Poker, and Jeff is off by 8:00 and hammered by 8:05. I love how this little team is getting quirkier by the minute. Morgan reminds them that they owe Chuck because tonight he’s going boldly where none of them have ever gone before - to have intercourse with a beautiful woman. Jeff and Lester stare sadly into the distance while Anna replies, “Speak for yourself.” And, of course, suddenly the group is very interested on what she has to say.
But they’re leaving. And then Morgan drops the big one: if they don’t finish, Tang gets the assistant manager job. That’s all he needed to say. Morgan tries to fist pump Lester as they head back but Lester bites his head off, “Don’t touch me”, Anna blows him off, so then he smacks Jeff’s ass. Morgan is actually really making me laugh tonight.
Back at the auction, Chuck and Sarah are heading upstairs when Chuck sees an hors d'œuvre plate and decides to grab a snack. Naturally, he ends up spilling sauce on his shirt (miraculously it’s on the part covered up by the jacket. I guess it was the make filming the scene a little easier). Great, he’s only been a spy for 5 seconds and he’s already messing up. Sarah tells him to go clean it up and to stop saying he’s a spy. But she says it with a smile on her face so I’m guessing she’s more amused than annoyed.
In the men’s room, Chuck manages to get most of it out before he’s joined by Polite English Man from the episode’s teaser. Chuck takes one look at him through the mirror and flashes, seeing the painting and the file on La Ciudad. He blinks it off and continues to stare for a moment but PEM looks at him (not through the mirror) and asks if they know each other. Chuck tries to play it cool but is definitely nervous as he lies to him and PEM immediately follows him out of the bathroom. Chuck meets up with Sarah, still on the stairs, and tells her he found La Ciudad. Now, I know Chuck isn’t a spy so he doesn’t really know how to look anything but obvious but Sarah has years of experience and training. So why does she react the exact same way Chuck does while Ciudad is staring at them from the bottom of the staircase?
They head upstairs and Chuck questions why they’re still there if the mission was just to identify Ciudad. Sarah, of course, ignores him and tells him to go wait at the bar, walking away before he can object. But he goes to the bar and if offered a drink by the bar tender.
Oh, Casey. First the limo driver and now the barman. I hope you get better cover jobs in the future.
Chuck snarks that he’d like a martini, shaken and stirred. But Casey just pours him a club soda (or Pelligrino…same thing *shrug*) and throws a cherry in just to make him feel all the more belittled. As soon as Casey throws the cherry in the glass, someone recognizes Chuck. Chuck looks to Casey then back at the man and says that, no, his name is Carmichael but the guy cuts him off, “Allan Waterman! :D Stanford? :D” leaving Chuck no other option but to sit there and chitchat. They do and Waterman brags about well his life turned out before asking Chuck what he’s up to. Chuck says he’s weighing his options and makes the assistant manager position at the Buy More sound a thousand times more prestigious than it is (and doesn’t mention the words “buy” or “more”). And he points out his date. But his timing couldn’t be worse because Sarah is busy trying to seduce Ciudad.
Nice
Waterman gives Chuck his card, all smug and douche-like, and Chuck instantly flashes on it (and he keeps making that face! :D XD). Once again, we get Intersect inconsistency for plot. The second the flash ends, Chuck says what knowledge he’s gained out loud, “Insider trading and offshore accounts in the…Cayman’s…” Alan is freaked the fuck out, thinking Chuck works for the FCC, and takes his card back and books it. And I smile.
Back at the Buy More, the team is sitting around, eating pizza and talking about…surprise, Chuck. Lester and Jeff think Sarah’s an escort; there’s no other way Chuck could land a girl that hot. But Anna, rationally, I suppose, says there’s no way because if she were, Chuck wouldn’t be able to afford her. Morgan tells the gang to get back to work, grabbing a busted computer from in front of the cage door on his way in. As the door starts to close, Anna jumps up, in slow-motion to try and stop it, “Noooooo!” But she’s too late. Lester laughs as Jeff stares in disbelief and Morgan is just confused.
Turns out that the lock on the cage is broken. Morgan, now a shade paler, tells them to go get the key, but no can do the kingdom and I aren’t exactly “simpatico” at the moment… - only two people have the key. Tang and…Chuck. Now Morgan is hyperventilating and the team heads out the door. Now Morgan is screaming at the top of his lungs for someone to help him, mainly Chuck.
But Chuck is too busy chugging sparkling water at the bar. As Casey pours him another drink, he notices La Ciudad and one of his men walking away with Sarah…with a gun to her back. He literally hops over the bar in pursuit, telling Chuck to stay. And as I’m saying, “Why do they keep telling him to ‘stay’? He’s not a d-,” Chuck says, “Stay? Stay? Like a dog…” Awesome.
So Ciudad and his goon lead Sarah down the stairs with Casey quickly in tow. Chuck, because he’s awesome, doesn’t stay at the bar but instead stands up and looks around. Though he’s still close to the bar. During his scoping, he eyes the painting and flashes. After he comes out of it, he decides to take a closer look at the infamous painting but, judging from the close-up shot of the corner, I’m guessing he’s focusing on the frame. As I finish that thought, a woman’s voice sounds, “Beautiful painting.” Chuck looks over at his new company and his eyes bug out slightly as he says, “Yeah, beautiful” (complete with looking her up and down).
She is pretty
And then he gets nervous and talks about Bob Ross XD After he finishes his babbling, the woman introduces herself, Malena. Chuck introduces himself as Chuck but immediately catches himself, switching it to Charles, Charles Carmichael (and he puts on this great voice and expression as he says it). They get to talking about the painting; Malena seems surprised that Chuck doesn’t like it. But, no, no, it seems lovely, he’s just more interested in the frame. As soon as the word “frame” leaves his mouth, she eyes him suspiciously…and I immediately get where this headed.
Before either of them can continue, Chuck’s phone rings; it’s Morgan. Chuck, not knowing his little buddy is fearing for his sanity, ignores the call. And he pretends that it’s some important call from his software company. Oh, Chuck. But Malena brings the conversation back to the frame (yup…I know exactly where this is headed. And it’s kind of awesome). But Chuck brushes it off and the two of them share a toast. Though Chuck looks like he’s about to shit himself.
I love the faces they make XD
Meanwhile, Casey is heading to the roof, gun in hand. He stumbles into the middle of an interrogation. Ciudad (*tries not to giggle*) demands to know who Sarah works for but she stays silent, ever the professional. And the sultry, Spanish music kicks in. Turns out it’s not just background noise, it’s also playing at the auction. Malena gets pretty damn excited, saying she loves a tango to which Chuck agrees, after all, who doesn’t? She immediately asks is he really does and he pales. She looks at him like a lioness looks at a baby zebra (or a foal, for those who are in the know ;]) but he figures, what the hell? He learned it so he might as well put it to use.
Ciudad continues to ask Sarah questions but she remains silent and now she’s seen Casey. And this is when this scene starts to make me smile like a fiend. Malena wiggles her finger to Chuck all, “c’mere” and they walk to each other, lifting a leg all dramatic-dancer-like in the process. I would cap it but it really doesn’t translate well to still. So I guess I’ll gif it.
Da daaa
They stand in front of each other, ready to dance, and Malena puts her hand on Chuck’s shoulder…and Chuck immediately does the same. And I crack up. She points out that his hand is supposed to be on her hip. Chuck’s smile becomes a more knowing one as he tells her that apparently he learned the girl’s part of this dance. And I’m doubled over laughing. Oh, Captain Awesome, you just got major points in my book for unknowingly doing that (he means well XD). Chuck asks if Malena would mind leading and she replies, again looking like a lioness, “Not at all.”
On the roof, Casey crashes the party and throws Sarah an extra gun while she takes out Ciudad and his goon. They end up in a standoff (though Sarah’s lying on her back on the ground) and Casey tells them they’re Federal agents and they’d better not move. Meanwhile, Chuck and Malena begin their tango. And it’s…amazing. The way they dance is so over-the-top that it’s hysterical. I almost want to screw capping it and just link to a video because it’s that damn funny.
So, Ciudad tells our spy duo that they’re international agents with MI-6. Sarah yells for them to drop their weapons and they do, all while Chuck continues his dance with “Malena.” PEM is telling the truth while “Malena” pulls Chuck in close, his back to her, and starts stroking his chest. Turns out PEM has been pursuing an arm’s dealer through 5 countries. Casey fills in the blank, La Ciudad. MalenawhoistotallynotCiudad strokes Chuck’s shoulders (still with his back to her) and he looks like he just had way too much fun XD Then he looks almost angry as he grabs her ass.
MI-6 intercepted the painting and found plutonium hidden in the frame so they figured rather than announce it, they’d remove the plutonium and keep the auction going as a way to draw Ciudad out. Sarah wonders aloud where Ciudad is if PEM isn’t him. Cut immediately to Malenadad pulling Chuck in for the finishing move. He looks pretty damn thrilled as she dips him (he just tangoed! Yay! I guess is what he’s thinking?) but then he looks up at her, getting a nice view of the giant scar on her neck. It triggers a flash and he discovers…dun dun dunnnnn! She’s La Ciudad!!!! I love his quiet little “help” before it cuts to a commercial.
Well. That was just a fun as the montage. The way they intercut the amazing dance with the awesome spy work is just another example of how well the show handles the juggling act of tones and worlds. While the “reveal” of La Ciudad was predictable, it was handled so well that I can’t complain. Also, I kind of love that the whole time they were assuming Ciudad was a man when, in fact, she’s a woman. Call me a feminist, but I think that is brilliant (and, sadly, probably likely to happen in real life; the assuming, I mean). And it also sets up that the Intersect isn’t 100% infallible. Awesome sequence, Tango, well done.
We come back to the Buy More and it turns out our Nerds haven’t left Morgan after all. They’re just playing video games while he’s having panic attacks. Now he’s on the phone with the hotel that’s housing the auction. A woman from the hotel finds Chuck as Morgan hilariously describes Chuck (seriously, he’s really growing on me in this episode. Go, writers! I say that because I don’t blame Josh Gomez; he does the best with what he’s given and tonight he’s given gold). The thing that stands out to me in his description is that he says Chuck is 6’1”. Upon hearing that, I do my research, because there is no way he’s only 6’1”…he’s 6’4”. I wonder why the writers would want to make everyone seem shorter. Oh, well, moving on.
Chuck, now nervous as fuck and showing it, asks Ciudad what line of work she’s in and she wants to know why he’s so interested. He says he’s just making conversation and, of course, she doesn’t believe him. Before she can vocalize her doubts, Hotel Lady comes over and asks if he’s Chuck Bartowski. Oh, TV timing. Chuck vehemently denies that he’s Bartowski but Morgan hears his voice through the phone and starts screaming for him. Ciudad looks just about sick of this little dance (see what I did there?) and Chuck tries to walk away from her. Oh, Chuck, haven’t you learned anything from movies? He barely makes it ten feet away when a giant (and I mean giant)
See
goon cuts him off. A smaller, though still giant (he is Zac’s height, after all) goon gets him from behind, gun at his back, and Ciudad escorts the trio to her room, in order to find out who Chuck really is as Sarah and Casey bolt up the stairs.
Over at the Buy More, the Nerds decide to call it a night and Morgan…poor, Morgan. He’s sitting, cradling his knees, on top of the table, rocking back and forth. The trio leaves him, Anna being the nicest about it, and he freaks out (especially when they kill the lights). Sarah and Casey head back to the main room for the auction and try to find Chuck. When they don’t, they run out to explore the hotel.
Chuck, however, is stashed away in a room, tied to a chair. Also, they took off his jacket for some reason. Ciudad starts with an easy question: his real name. He insists that it’s Charles Carmichael. Ciudad grabs a huge knife and throws it straight at his balls, just missing them. Chuck immediately responds, “Chuck Bartowski…!” and I laugh. Ciudad’s eyes light up as she approaches him. She leans in seductively as she removes the knife from the chair and tells Chuck that before he answers her next question, she wants him to think long and hard about her options.
Poor Chuck, his brain must be so confused right now. On the one hand, he’s got a beautiful woman reaching for his genitalia and practically sitting on his lap talking about things that are long and hard. On the other, she’s got a huge knife and is planning on torturing him. He doesn’t seem to be though as he cowers in fear (as any sane person would, even with the subconscious confusion).
She weighs her options aloud. She could yank out a tooth; too noisy. She could cut off a toe; too messy. Or she could chuck him off the balcony (and she finishes it off with a “Chuck” to make it funny). He’d land face first, his teeth going through the back of his head. She winces, telling him it’s not a good way to go. The entire time she talks, she keeps moving the knife around his face in a threatening manner, practically taunting him. Going from the pathetic man that was Zarnow to this just makes my heart so happy.
Though Chuck looks less than thrilled
So, her question: who does he work for? He swears that he doesn’t work for anybody. Cue the goons. They lift up the chair and start walking to the window. Chuck yells that he fixes computers for a living and he just snuck into the party under a fake name to impress a girl, “please put chair down!” Go, Chuck! Even in that situation, he’s able to think fast and come up with a believable cover story. But Ciudad ain’t buyin’ it. Just before the goons are going to chuck him, he yells out that it’s a setup. Now he’s got her attention. She asks what he’s talking about, so he tells her it’s the painting. I love how her goons turn him around so he can face her while he talks XD
He says that he thinks the painting is a fake because the picture he saw of it in the paper had a different frame (though during his spiel he bargains with her to have the goons put him down. Smart man, Chuck), meaning someone must have swapped it out and she shouldn’t buy it. She seems to believe him as he jokes about his lack of painting-buying budget. But she pulls a gun on him and asks how to fix a computer.
Meanwhile, Chuck’s handlers are in the hall, tracking his watch. Cut back to Chuck as he answers Ciudad’s question. Now, I’m just gonna’ type what he says because, well, yeah: “My first inclination is that your bus speed is not up to snuff with your video card. I’m assuming we’re talking about a PC here, right? Is your memory dedicated?” He sounds completely confident and sure of himself (and not the slightest bit afraid, I might add).
Ciudad lowers her gun, telling him that she believes him. Just as he breathes a gigantic sigh of relief, she tells him the problem she’s facing. Since Chuck’s seen her, he’s got to die anyway. He vehemently (as he says) disagrees as she puts the silencer on her gun. Sarah and Casey are just around the corner when they spy a goon. Ciudad promises Chuck that it will be fast and that she enjoyed their tango. Casey and Sarah come round the corner, holding hands and giggling (and Casey says, “I don’t like it that much though, he was kind of silly :D” and I’m struck by how great it is too see him grin like that, seeing as he’s gorgeous).
Just as they finish their little conversation, Sarah kicks the goon in the knees. Ciudad hears it from inside the room and starts shooting the door. Her goons fire as well while she heads for the window. And Chuck rocks back and forth is his seat while he screams…H’okay. Ciudad jumps out the window and we cut to Waterman, panicking while he tells Shelly, over the phone, that the FCC is onto them, I mean, they know about the Cayman’s! Just when his voice reaches maximum shrill, Ciudad throws a patio table though his door, breaking the glass. He falls to the floor in terror and throws his arms in the air, surrendering. And I wipe away tears of joy and laughter. Ciudad just ignores him and runs.
Chuck keeps screaming and rocking back and forth as the goons ignore him and jump out the window. And his chair topples over to the floor from all the rocking. I’m assuming the goons out of ammo and that’s why they just leave him? Yup, just as one of them tries to shoot from the balcony (yay for logical actions!), he hears that familiar “click” of bulletlessness. Chuck calls for Sarah to help (why does he never call for Casey?) and they kick the door down and start shooting the place to all hell, landing a shot at the remaining goon. As he falls to his death, we see him fly past Waterman’s window. And Waterman, still on the floor with his hands up, yells, “Oh, my God!”
I LOVE. THIS. EPISODE (poor Waterman XD)
Sarah runs to Chuck’s side while Casey checks the balcony. She asks if he’s okay and Chuck’s a little freaked out, understandably. Casey asks if Chuck told them anything and he’s offended, “Of course not!” Casey considers Chuck lucky to be alive. But La Ciudad isn’t quite as happy. Her remaining goon says they need to leave the country. But first, Ciudad insists (as she shows him the ID she stole), they need to take Chuck out.
We come back from a commercial to find that Chuck’s getting back home and that Ellie slept on the couch in the hopes of catching him. He covers her with a blanket (♥) and she wakes up, asking him how the date went. He quickly says it was “good, great, fine” and he’s going to bed and he loves her (d’awww). But Ellie isn’t satisfied. She pulls him back and makes him join her on the couch. Chuck is very vague, not giving much, but he says that Sarah is too exhausting for him. So, naturally, Ellie asks what happened; did they tango? Oh, yeah, they tangoed. And Chuck tells Ellie that Awesome (sans “Captain”, I like it) taught him the girl’s part, so it was a little difficult.
Cue Awesome, in nothing but boxers, asking Chuck if he did the famous dip. Chuck was on the receiving end of the dip, which prompts Awesome to ask if Chuck tangoed with a woman. And on that note…But Ellie stops him from leaving once more. He looks upset and she looks doubly so, practically on the verge of tears as she asks her brother why he won’t talk to her.
My knee jerk reaction is wondering why she’s so crushed but then I realize…they’ve really only had each other. Going from the “Dad quote” in the Pilot, to “Dad’s suit” in Helicopter, to Ellie’s maternal treatment of Chuck…they’re so close that they share everything with each other, because they’re all each other must have had for so long, that now for Chuck to be so quiet about a date, of all things…it makes perfect sense for Ellie to be that gutted (and, yes, I swear that I really was thinking all this during my first time around. The writers aren’t explicit about the details of their parents, but they’ve given just enough that you get that they weren’t around very much at all, and certainly not at all now).
Chuck tells her that it’s complicated and to just let it go. The words may sound harsh, but he says it as though he’s really trying not to hurt her feelings. To go from the auction, a fun, fast-paced, dangerous sequence to this is just… Ooooh, I love this show. Ellie gives up, saying that if he won’t talk to her, maybe he’ll talk to Morgan. The guy called about 75 times; he locked himself in a storage cage.
Mozart’s Sull’aria begins to play as we transition to Morgan in various positions in the cage, ala The Shawshank Redemption. Finally, he’s woken up by the smell of a slice of a pizza. He jumps back, startled, to find that Chuck has come to bail him out (still in his tux). He gives Morgan the pizza and asks what happened. Morgan tells him all about Tang and offers to help, after all, never leave your wingman. But Chuck assures him that it’s fine and he should go sleep. Morgan insists but Chuck tells him it’ll be nice to do something he’s actually go at, though he appreciates the offer. And Morgan splits (a little too quickly for my liking after that sincere moment they just shared).
Cue the awesome Band Of Horses song as Chuck gets started and we fast forward to the following morning. Big Mike shows up for work to find that Chuck has, indeed, finished the job. Two days was only meant as incentive, he didn’t think Chuck would actually pull it off; he’s impressed. And he’s not a man easily impressed. Though, judging by the brilliant expression he gives his danish, I’d say those impress him just fine.
But Chuck tells him that only fixed the last few; his team did most of them so they deserve the credit. Big Mike shares the first rule of management with him: always take the credit. Tang busts in with all the beers Chuck’s team drank the night before. But Big Mike could care less, so long as Chuck keeps it out of the store from now on. And he gets extra points for style.
He is lookin’ sharp
Tang grunts as he tells Chuck he looks like a waiter. And he drops the cans on the floor for him to clean up, calling him a kiss ass. I hate that man (but I love to hate him). Meanwhile, Morgan tells the tale of his night of horror and how brave he was during it all. Aaand he’s pressing charges; the cage is a major fire hazard.
Casey catches up to Chuck (still in his tux) and compliments him on his work last night. But Chuck isn’t in the mood for his shit; he’s working on an all-nighter so he’d appreciate it if Casey eased up on the sarcasm. But Casey was being sincere, because of Chuck they now what she looks like, they have a blood sample, and they know that she’s heading to Central America. And Chuck’s lookin’ sharp. Just as Chuck thanks him, Casey tells him that that was facetious. And he calls him an idiot.
Later that day, Chuck is back in uniform as he gives a customer their fixed computer from behind the front desk. As the happy customer heads out the door, two giants (one of them Ciudad’s remaining goon, the other a new goon) bump past him. Chuck spots them and falls to the floor to hide. No, really, he just drops on the spot, it’s amazing. So, he hides as they search the floor. Casey spots them from the HEET Wall (the wall of TVs; that’s what it’s called >_>; ) and goes into spy mode, following them.
Meanwhile, Tang finds Chuck and thinks he’s avoiding work. Chuck asks him to go away but Tang says he will never go away. When Chuck goes to sleep at night, all he’ll see “is Tang in [his] face.” And Chuck’s reaction says it all.
Goon number 1 finds Tang and asks where he can find Chuck Bartowski. But by the time Tang turns back to the desk, Chuck’s already gone. Goon 1 gives up and moves on. Outside, Ciudad is disguised as a delivery woman. She heads over to the Wienerlicious, seeing as it’s right across from the Buy More, and passes by Sarah, lunch in hand and heading to the Buy More. Sarah glances at Ciudad and notices her giant (completely different looking than before…) scar. The tango music from earlier is playing over their interaction and it’s a great decision. The pair stop and scope each other out for a moment before heading on their respective ways. And a new tango has begun.
Sarah ducks behind the delivery truck and tells Casey, through her watch, that they have company. But he’s already on it. Chuck, now hiding out behind Customer Service, pages himself over the P.A, requesting his presence at the storage cage. Goon 2 asks Casey where the storage cage is and he happily obliges, leading him through the store.
Meanwhile, Sarah spots Ciudad on the roof of the Wienerlicious and heads over. Chuck comes out of hiding to see Goon 1 with Morgan, who’s pointing over at Chuck. Oh, Morgan, if only you knew. Chuck panics and crawls away while Ciudad opens up a giant box on the roof. She pulls out the components of a sniper rifle and begins assembling it while Sarah ascends the latter to the roof.
Back at the Buy More, Casey has lead Goon 2 to the refrigerators, telling him about a big sale they’re having. But G2 doesn’t want to hear it. He pulls a gun on Casey and demands to know where Chuck is. Casey grabs him the wrist, disabling him. G2 tries to retaliate with a punch but Casey head butts his fist. They scuffle and Casey drops him into a freezer. Wow, Casey is one badass mother fucker. Who else could punch a man’s fist with his face and win?
On the roof, Sarah approaches Ciudad, thinking she has the upper hand but Ciudad spins around, trying to hit Sarah with the gun. Sarah deflects it and Ciudad kicks her in the face. Sarah glares up at her as she wipes the blood from her mouth. And the hand-to-hand combat commences... But first we go back to Chuck. He’s still crawling, though now he’s made it to the storage cage. He hides under the desk just as G1 comes in. When he checks the cage for Chuck, Chuck jumps up and slams the door. Victory! And then G1 opens the door… Chuck looks petrified as he recalls how broken the door was earlier that day. G1 pulls a gun on him and he makes the best face ever.
And then I shot “OOOOOHHHHHH!” as a microwave collides with G1’s face in the most awesome way I’ve ever seen.
Casey quickly shows up, offering up a one liner so cheesy, Ahnuld wouldn’t go near it, “Now that’s what I call movin’ some merchandise, yeah?” But it makes me laugh so hard (as did the little chime of the microwave coinciding with Chuck looking to the goon). Casey drags him away as Chuck agrees, although it sounds more like a random sound given his fear.
Back on the roof, the badassery continues as Sarah and Ciudad duke it out. Ciudad comes this close to drop-kicking Sarah in the face twice. Then she comes this close to shoving Sarah’s face on some loose…nails…? I don’t know, but it’s badass and scary. Sarah elbows her in the face, twice for good measure, and gets the cuffs ready. But Ciudad pulls out her trusty knife. Sarah manages to kick her ass, well, punch her in the face half a dozen times, finishing it off with the most badass (it's the word of the fight. Seriously though, this fight is pretty damn awesome) of them all. Then she cuffs her to a satellite on the roof and the cheesy lines continue, as she tells the unconscious Ciudad to, “Hang here.” Even Buffy is rolling her eyes now.
Meanwhile, Morgan is at the Nerd Herd desk, talking over the loudspeaker in an hysterical voice, “Uhhh…Charles Irving Bartowski of the Encino Bartowskis, could you please report to the return’s desk. Charles Irving Bartowski.” But Chuck comes over to him instead, asking him what’s up, though he looks pretty annoyed. Morgan says it was nothing, he just loves using that thing and they should get one for Chuck’s apartment and good news, they fixed the-.” And now Chuck has not only unplugged the microphone, but he's walking away with it, “-the lock on the storage cage, so…” and Chuck is gone.
This. Show.
We come back from a word from our sponsors to find the Bartowski residence that night. Chuck strolls into the kitchen while Ellie is cooking. He apologizes for being kind of evasive, it’s just that he didn’t want to lie and he chose not saying anything as the lesser of two evils. Which prompts Ellie to wonder why Chuck would lie to her. But he just needs him to trust her and know that it has nothing to do with her. She thinks he wants her to butt out but he swears that’s not the case. He just doesn’t want to get Ellie excited for his relationship with Sarah when it seems doomed. And it’s doomed because she’s not into him. But Ellie has seen the way that Sarah looks at him and she is definitely into him. The way Chuck’s face lights up when he hears that is brilliant.
But Ellie insists that it’s none of her business. But then Chuck opens the floor; anything Ellie wants to ask, she can. Ellie is pretty happy as she asks, “Do you like her?” Chuck gets all embarrassed as he tells her that he does, and she squees and it’s adorable.
But Chuck makes her calm down, “no unnecessary excitement!” and asks her for another question. But that’s all Ellie needed to know. She doesn’t want to nag him about Sarah, and his future, his job…she doesn’t want to pester him into oblivion. But Chuck assures her that she’s not a pest. It’s just that Ellie knows what an incredible guy Charles Bartowski is and sometimes she’s not so sure that he does. He gets all embarrassed and asks her how’d she feel about a brother/sister hug. She’s open to it. And they embrace. And my heart grows twelve sizes.
Then the doorbell rings. I’m guessing Chuck was expecting to see one of them.
Guess who he wasn’t
Morgan thought they had plans, seeing as Chuck told him he’d see him later, in the normal, “bye” sense of the phrase. Ugh, Morgan, and you were doing so well. But Chuck, being Chuck, invites him in. Sarah hands him the bottle of wine she brought and they exchange a quick cover kiss. He notices her lip and asks if she’s okay. It’s an occupational hazard; sometimes people get in lucky kicks. Sarah, my dear, you are growing on me.
And then this gorgeous song begins to play (and I immediately download The National’s entire discography) as an aerial view of the city showcases the passage of time. Now that the meal is over, Chuck walks Sarah to her car. She congratulates him on doing so well on his first mission. But he tells her to stop; he’s not really a spy. But Sarah points out that he survived a near-death experience, under the threat of torture, and apprehended one of the world’s most elusive killers. Most spies would consider that a pretty good day. That’s all well and good for Chuck but he reminds Sarah that tomorrow he still has to go clock in at Buy More. What’s the good of being a hero is nobody knows about it? But Sarah tells him that he knows. And so does she.
Chuck points out that if they were really dating, this would be the part where he’d be forced to kiss her goodnight. And she points out his use of the word “forced.” But he’s sure he could suffer through it. She is too. They share a lingering gaze of sexual and emotional tension before Sarah turns and walks away, leaving Chuck to watch her depart. And then Morgan slides into the shot and points out how creepy Casey is.
And, holy shit, is he ever
Chuck agrees and Morgan waves to Casey before they head back inside. Before they do though, Chuck still stares into the distance as the lyrics sound, “You know I dreamed about you for twenty-nine years before I saw you.” And I think that that can't be a coincidence (even though Chuck is 26) as the scene fades to black.
And that concludes Chuck Versus the Tango. Wow. Talk about great TV. We got the usual fake-out opening, after the darkest one the show has done yet, but it was still fresh and fun. The characters are all coming into their own, especially Morgan and Casey, and Sarah finally feels like she has a consistent personality, even if it is a little dry. Ellie’s neediness for Chuck didn’t feel quite as annoying as it has in the past and Chuck continues to be charming, endearing, and relatable. The jokes were hilarious, the action was fast-paced and entertaining, La Ciudad was a great villain, and we see that the Intersect can, in fact, get it a little wrong sometimes. We also see the budding romance between handler and asset, as well as the tension Chuck’s double life is starting to put on himself and his loved ones. Not to mention the pop culture references were funny and the music, both score and found, were put to fantastic use. Every cue, every song, elevated the scene. Practically everything about this episode worked on all levels. All around, this was my favorite so far.
Overall, Tango receives an 8.5/10.