Boots, Hats, and Spurs Epilogue
Title: Boots, Hats and Spurs Epilogue
Pairing: Yoochun/Jaejoong
Rating: NC-17
Disclaimer: Not mine to tame, but I'm gonna try to ride 'em anyway. :)
Summary: You can't ever go home again. Ever.
Warning: Angst. I strongly suggest you have tissues handy.
Epilogue:
this is where my grandma lives, and where i was while i wrote this fic
Five Years Later
Yoochun stood, eyes shut, inside the old barn. The morning sun filtered through the weathered wooden slats. He wondered for a moment how safe it would be, then said screw it and climbed the rickety ladder.
Things weren't the same. Despite the rule that their children were not allowed to play in here, both Jacob and Hana's names were carved into the wood, as were all of Junho and Junsu's kids' names.
But Yoochun only cared about one part of it. It wasn't hard to pry up the board that had his and Jae's name carved into it. He took it back down the ladder and left it by the door, and took one more cursory trek through his childhood memories.
Thirty-six and he finally felt like he was growing up, like he was reaching past who he always thought he was. It took five years but Crissy finally convinced him to move, and Yoohwan helped them find a house near his, one on a half acre of land.
And Yoochun had a job. There was a riding school that Yoohwan sent all his children to that agreed to hire him on as a trainer. And they also agreed to stable Storm and Tookee. The Kims bought his land and, Junho and his family were moving into their house. Yoochun knew he'd be back to visit so it wasn't like he was really saying good bye.
Hana didn't want to leave, but Jacob was finicky about dirt and grime and poo. Definitely not a country boy.
Yoochun paused in the far corner, both hands on the wall and let tears fall. Two weeks after his last night with Jaejoong, he told Crissy everything. All his secrets, every moment with Jaejoong. He expected her to leave him. But she cried and held him and said, "It's okay to love him, baby. I've known from the start that he's held more of you than I have." And then she slapped him for cheating on her, and life moved on.
He kicked the wall in frustration, upsetting the dust and cobwebs in the corner. He went to turn away, and his eye caught an unnatural shape in the dust. He toed it with his boot, and then laughed. He bent down and picked up the blue bottle. He could still hear it as it tumbled down the loft after Jae had thrown it almost fifteen years ago. Yoochun wiped the dust from it, stared at it and then set it back in the corner.
He left the barn, taking the two-by-four with him. He picked up the hatchet and hacked at it until he was left with the part with their names. Crissy wouldn't like it, but she'd understand.
He mounted Storm, Lightning’s fiery colt, and rode to the house without looking back.
They left the next morning, stopping in town to say goodbye to his parents and the Kims.
"I am so proud of you," his mom said. "So proud, but don't be a stranger. You and Yoohwan need to visit at least once a year.”
“We will, Ma. I promise."
Mrs. Kim hugged him, and then he heard a paper crumple as she put it in his shirt pocket. "His phone number. He lives in New York," she whispered.
Yoochun's breath caught. "I ca-"
"I know," she said and touched his cheek, “but just in case.”
He hugged her tightly.
"Dad, do we have to go?" Hana asked again.
"Yes, cowgirl, we do." She folded her arms and pouted.
They said final goodbyes and then left. He was driving his truck, towing the horse trailer. Hana sat next to him, sulking. Crissy followed in the U-haul, towing their other car.
A few hours later, they stopped at a rest stop to use the bathroom. He looked over at Hana. The girl said nothing the whole trip, but Yoochun didn't mind. He didn't want to talk either. With a sigh, she got out of the truck and walked towards the bathrooms.
Hana had missed Jaejoong when he'd left, but once a year she got a birthday card from him. There was never a return address.
He dug the paper from his shirt pocket, pulling out the red lighter with it. He thought of calling him for Hana’s sake, but knew in his heart that would just be an excuse to talk to him. Nothing good would come from it. He couldn't be friends with Jaejoong. His heart wanted more than that. His soul needed more than that.
All or nothing. And he already had enough in his wife and children.
He flicked the lighter and put it up to the paper. Fire curled around the ten numbers. He held it until the flames licked his fingers. He dropped it to the floor boards and snuffed it out with his boot.
The lighter slipped back into his shirt pocket.
Chapter 5: Last Time
Chapter 4: Old Friends
Chapter 3: Kiss Goodbye
Chapter 2: Not Here
Chapter 1: Coming Home
.
Pairing: Yoochun/Jaejoong
Rating: NC-17
Disclaimer: Not mine to tame, but I'm gonna try to ride 'em anyway. :)
Summary: You can't ever go home again. Ever.
Warning: Angst. I strongly suggest you have tissues handy.
Epilogue:
this is where my grandma lives, and where i was while i wrote this fic
Five Years Later
Yoochun stood, eyes shut, inside the old barn. The morning sun filtered through the weathered wooden slats. He wondered for a moment how safe it would be, then said screw it and climbed the rickety ladder.
Things weren't the same. Despite the rule that their children were not allowed to play in here, both Jacob and Hana's names were carved into the wood, as were all of Junho and Junsu's kids' names.
But Yoochun only cared about one part of it. It wasn't hard to pry up the board that had his and Jae's name carved into it. He took it back down the ladder and left it by the door, and took one more cursory trek through his childhood memories.
Thirty-six and he finally felt like he was growing up, like he was reaching past who he always thought he was. It took five years but Crissy finally convinced him to move, and Yoohwan helped them find a house near his, one on a half acre of land.
And Yoochun had a job. There was a riding school that Yoohwan sent all his children to that agreed to hire him on as a trainer. And they also agreed to stable Storm and Tookee. The Kims bought his land and, Junho and his family were moving into their house. Yoochun knew he'd be back to visit so it wasn't like he was really saying good bye.
Hana didn't want to leave, but Jacob was finicky about dirt and grime and poo. Definitely not a country boy.
Yoochun paused in the far corner, both hands on the wall and let tears fall. Two weeks after his last night with Jaejoong, he told Crissy everything. All his secrets, every moment with Jaejoong. He expected her to leave him. But she cried and held him and said, "It's okay to love him, baby. I've known from the start that he's held more of you than I have." And then she slapped him for cheating on her, and life moved on.
He kicked the wall in frustration, upsetting the dust and cobwebs in the corner. He went to turn away, and his eye caught an unnatural shape in the dust. He toed it with his boot, and then laughed. He bent down and picked up the blue bottle. He could still hear it as it tumbled down the loft after Jae had thrown it almost fifteen years ago. Yoochun wiped the dust from it, stared at it and then set it back in the corner.
He left the barn, taking the two-by-four with him. He picked up the hatchet and hacked at it until he was left with the part with their names. Crissy wouldn't like it, but she'd understand.
He mounted Storm, Lightning’s fiery colt, and rode to the house without looking back.
They left the next morning, stopping in town to say goodbye to his parents and the Kims.
"I am so proud of you," his mom said. "So proud, but don't be a stranger. You and Yoohwan need to visit at least once a year.”
“We will, Ma. I promise."
Mrs. Kim hugged him, and then he heard a paper crumple as she put it in his shirt pocket. "His phone number. He lives in New York," she whispered.
Yoochun's breath caught. "I ca-"
"I know," she said and touched his cheek, “but just in case.”
He hugged her tightly.
"Dad, do we have to go?" Hana asked again.
"Yes, cowgirl, we do." She folded her arms and pouted.
They said final goodbyes and then left. He was driving his truck, towing the horse trailer. Hana sat next to him, sulking. Crissy followed in the U-haul, towing their other car.
A few hours later, they stopped at a rest stop to use the bathroom. He looked over at Hana. The girl said nothing the whole trip, but Yoochun didn't mind. He didn't want to talk either. With a sigh, she got out of the truck and walked towards the bathrooms.
Hana had missed Jaejoong when he'd left, but once a year she got a birthday card from him. There was never a return address.
He dug the paper from his shirt pocket, pulling out the red lighter with it. He thought of calling him for Hana’s sake, but knew in his heart that would just be an excuse to talk to him. Nothing good would come from it. He couldn't be friends with Jaejoong. His heart wanted more than that. His soul needed more than that.
All or nothing. And he already had enough in his wife and children.
He flicked the lighter and put it up to the paper. Fire curled around the ten numbers. He held it until the flames licked his fingers. He dropped it to the floor boards and snuffed it out with his boot.
The lighter slipped back into his shirt pocket.
Chapter 5: Last Time
Chapter 4: Old Friends
Chapter 3: Kiss Goodbye
Chapter 2: Not Here
Chapter 1: Coming Home
.