Boots, Hats and Spurs 2/5
Title: Boots, Hats and Spurs 2/5
Pairing: Yoochun/Jaejoong
Rating: NC-17
Disclaimer: Not mine to tame, but I'm gonna try to ride 'em anyway. :)
Summary: You can't ever go home again. Ever.
Warning: Angst. I strongly suggest you have tissues handy.
Chapter 2:
this is where my grandma lives, and where i was while i wrote this fic
The day passed like all the rest. Muck the stables, milk the cows, change the water, put the horses through their paces while their dad was in town, and then load hay, eat lunch. Load more hay.
Thunderclouds had gathered through the day, randomly throwing raindrops on them. They covered the stacked bales of hay with a bright, blue tarp. It was rare when they had the baled hay stacked and did not have a new field of cut hay to bale before it rained. It was nice to know they wouldn't lose a day waiting for cut hay to dry.
The only difference on this day compared to the rest was that Yoochun thought about Jaejoong. Who he used to be. Who he was now, and Yoochun realized that he had no idea who Jaejoong was. He was the same, but Jaejoong was completely different.
When they entered the house for dinner, their mom said, "Yoohwan, what is this I hear about you applying to California schools?"
"Fuck," Yoohwan muttered so only Yoochun could hear.
"Well?" she stood with hands on hips.
Yoohwan looked at Yoochun.
Yoochun raised his hands. "This is your show, bro."
"And you," she said turning to Yoochun. "Jaejoong has called seven times. Seven. Whatever he said to piss you off I'm sure he didn't mean. And he said that he had to see you and that you knew where he'd be."
Yoochun turned away.
"I can't believe you're abandoning me," Yoohwan said.
Yoochun went to their mom. He held her shoulders."Yoohwan wants to go to college in California. He doesn't want to be a farmer like me. He wants to major in biology and study marine biology. He's bigger than this town, Mom. Let him follow his dreams."
"But he's my baby."
"He's nineteen. He needs to go."
She nodded.
Yoochun kissed her cheek. He walked away, slapping Yoohwan's shoulder as he went by. "There you go."
He went up the stairs, undressed, showered. All in a daze. He stood in the middle of his room wrapped only in a towel staring at nothing.
Thunder rumbled outside.
He had no desire to see Jaejoong again. And yet he knew he would go. They had been friends for twenty one years. He wore his nice jeans, a tank top. A plaid cotton button down.
His mom surveyed him after he'd gone downstairs to put his boots on. "Mrs. Kim says Jaejoong is going to Paris."
Yoochun nodded.
"And you're going to let him?"
He looked up quickly.
"When are you two boys going to learn there is very little you can hide from me?"
Yoochun smiled and then looked down.
"He will stay if you ask him."
"And I'd hate myself for it. He wants Paris. I want this."
She nodded. "Get going. He'll be waiting for you."
Yoochun grabbed a jean jacket and left the house and walked across the fields. He could have driven, but he needed the time to think. The sun was setting, throwing red and orange through the gaps in the storm clouds.
There was a patch of land, a deep gully, that separated their families’ farms. Near the gulch was an abandoned barn surrounded by wooden, decayed fencing. Yoochun hadn't even been out this far in two years. It was just grazing land for their cows and horses. It'd always been their place. Over the years, they'd added sturdier wood, stronger supports. It was never enough to actually use the building again, but it worked for two teenage boys who needed a place to smoke weed, drink beer and experiment with each other.
The first kiss was at fifteen.
Everything escalated from there.
Jaejoong always said he was going to get out of this place, laying naked with his head on Yoochun's chest. Yoochun sometimes agreed to his plans of escape, but they never went through.
And then one day Jae was gone. A friend of a friend had a place for him to stay, and Yoochun could say that Jae had never looked back.
Until now.
The old barn came into view. Jaejoong was leaning against it, smoking a cigarette. They stared at each other.
Rain splattered on the wood, fat drops darkening the light wood.
Jae was wearing jeans that probably cost more than Yoochun's entire outfit, and a blue t-shirt with a random splotch of green plaid on one shoulder. He hadn't seen last night, but in those jeans and that t-shirt, Jae's muscles were on proud display.
"You've bulked up," Yoochun said.
Jae flexed his right arm. "These babies pay the bills."
Yoochun smiled. "I'm sure your pretty face has something to do with it."
If he'd been closer, Jae would have hit him. "Don't call me pretty," he muttered and turned around. "Are you coming in?"
Yoochun followed him into the barn and up the wooden ladder to the loft. The beams creaked. There was a pile of fresh hay. A blue blanket was spread over it.
"You ..."
"It was all moldy and nasty," Jae said. "I ain't laying in that."
"Presumptuous."
A single, perfectly groomed eyebrow arched. "What are you here for?"
"To say good bye." not see you later
Jae threw himself on the blanket. "God, I shouldn't have come back."
"Probably not."
"You're not happy to see me?"
Yoochun shrugged. He sat on the wooden flanks. His fingers traced the words they had carved over the years.
The rain suddenly increased, pattering above them. Shadows were thrown around as lightning flashed. The clap of thunder was loud.
And Yoochun realized he was different than he had been three years ago. Somehow, being away from Jaejoong made him different. He was less rebellious, less spontaneous, less likely to see if he could walk across the decaying support beams just to see if they’d hold his weight.
Jae had yet to find his dreams, and Yoochun lived his everyday.
"So what now?" Jae whispered.
"I feel like you're waiting for me to ask you to stay."
"And?"
"You're miserable here, Joongie. You don't belong here."
"If you thought I'd stay, would you ask me?"
That was a difficult question to answer, so Yoochun didn't.
Jaejoong took a deep breath. "Will you at least act like you'll miss me?"
Yoochun chuckled. "I've missed you every day. I'm used to it. And you're not really here, so it's no different than two days ago."
Jae sat up. "What do you mean I'm not really here?"
"Your mind is already in Paris."
"And yours is thinking about how much this rain will help your hay."
Yoochun shrugged. "I'm a farmer, Jae."
"I need you to hold me."
"Why? And don't tell me you're scared. It may have been three years but I still know you."
"Then I'm selfish and I want you to hold me. I haven’t felt your body next to mine for three years. I want it."
Yoochun stared at him, looked down and then shook his head. He held his arm out.
"Don't give me a fucking pity cuddle, you asshole." Jae flung himself back to the blanket.
The storm was getting worse, wind increasing, lightning more frequent. One night they'd fallen asleep and woken up soaked. The next week they'd repaired the roof, at least the part over their makeshift bedroom.
Yoochun sighed again. He crawled over to the hay pile and lay next to Jaejoong. Jae grunted and rolled on his side. Yoochun followed him, propping up on an elbow. There was a good six inches between them. Jae's t-shirt had ridden up, revealing a strip of pale skin. Yoochun reached over and trailed fingers along it. The calluses on his hands were a stark contrast to the softness of Jae’s body.
Jae suppressed a shiver. "I thought you weren't going to do this."
"What else is there between us, Jae?"
Jae rolled over, eyes flashing in anger. "Did you just throw twenty years of life long friendship into a single night of fucking? Fuck you."
Jae tried to get up. Yoochun held his arm. Jae struggled, hay crunching underneath them. Jae was strong, but Yoochun made a habit of wrestling calves to the ground for branding. He had Jae pinned under him quickly.
"Don't make me hogtie you," Yoochun whispered.
Jae's mouth twisted. "You going to rape me then?"
"Don't be stupid. I love you, Jae. I always have and I always will, but there's three years between us. Three years of separation, and sometimes, if it's strong enough, love can make three years disappear, but it hasn't with us. In five more years, you'll be little more than my childhood friend, my first lover. We'll call. You'll come visit, and each time we'll be a little bit farther apart."
"Shut up. Stop it, and shut up." Jae's breath hitched.
"You know it's the truth."
"And you're saying it like it doesn't matter, like I don't matter, like nothing between us matters."
Yoochun smiled and moved hair off Jae's forehead. And then he kissed the flawless skin. Jae's arms went around him, fingers clutching at the back of Yoochun's shirt. He buried his face in Yoochun's shoulder, body shaking. Yoochun rolled over a tiny bit so he could wrap his arms around Jae. He held him tightly, tears dripping silently on his cheeks. The storm had settled to rain and wind. Thunder rumbled in the distance.
"I love you, Chunnie. You're the only reason I'm here." He leaned away.
Yoochun didn't hesitate to kiss him.
"I love you, I love you, I love you."
"Sh, Jae, I know you do."
"You're acting like you thought I didn't."
"I know you do. And I love you. Forever. No matter where you are. But-"
"No. No buts. Not right now, please. Just you love me, I love you. That's it. Right now, that's it."
"Okay." And Yoochun loved him, deepening their kiss, rolling them back over, Jae underneath him.
"Please, Chunnie. Say goodbye, long hard and hot enough that I'll never forget you."
Their lips melted, their mouths as one. They'd still been teenagers the last time their bodies had reacted to each other, and now they were men, harder hotter, more defined. More apt to know what they wanted.
Yoochun had been with one girl in the last three years, but he could tell that Jae had shared his body with more than one man or woman. But now, it was about them, re-exploring, re-discovering the way they fit together.
Yoochun moved his mouth to Jae's ear, lips ghosting down the edge, tongue licking the lobe. Jae's breath hitched again as Yoochun kissed his neck. His hands gripped the hem of the t-shirt. He pulled away, kneeling with legs straddling Jae's thighs. Jae sat up, and lifted his arms. Yoochun pulled the shirt over his head.
Jae tried to unbutton Yoochun's shirt as Yoochun ran calloused hands over Jae's shoulders. Jae tittered in annoyance and smacked Yoochun's hands. Grinning, he dropped his hands to his knees, watching Jae's face. He could tell that Jae was trying not to think too much. A pink tongue swiped along Jae's lower lip. Yoochun fought the urge to kiss him. Jae's hand slid up his chest to his shoulders and then down his arms, removing the plaid shirt. They roved over muscles, memorizing dips and curves in his arms and shoulders. Incredibly soft skin trailed up his neck, and then fingers tangled in his hair.
Jae pressed their mouths back together. Yoochun wrapped his arms around Jae's body, fingers digging into the muscles, pulling a needy moan from Jae's throat.
Wind shook the barn, a few rain drops blew in from between the old siding, landing cold on their skin. Lightning flashed and thunder clapped above them, around them and they both jumped, but didn't break apart.
Yoochun took off his tank top. Jae unbuckled his belt, and fought with the button on his jeans before it finally gave. The sound of the zipper lowering seemed louder than the storm. Jae touched his stomach and torso, moving along the muscles. A steady whimper escaped his throat with each new spot.
"God, Yoochun." He tried to push Yoochun's jeans down, whimpering when they barely moved. His hand gripped Yoochun's hip bones.
"I can say the same of you," Yoochun whispered, his rough fingers splayed over Jae's perfect abs.
They kissed again. Yoochun nudged Jae's body and he laid them back down. Jae finally pushed Yoochun's pants down enough to grab his bare ass.
"Hang on," Yoochun said, with a shiver. "I have to take my boots off." He rolled away and sat up. He pulled his boots and socks off, and then stood up to finish undressing.
"I told everyone about you," Jae said. "All my friends. And this one girl always loved to tease me about saving the horse and riding the cowboy."
Yoochun smiled. "Old joke." "I know, but I like riding you more than I like riding horses." Yoochun slipped out of his boxers.
"God, Yoochun."
It was dark, black, with light coming from flashes of lightning, but it was enough for Jae to see his body. Yoochun climbed back on the blanket. He kissed Jae's stomach, biting up tight muscles and quivering skin. Their lips met again. Yoochun unbuttoned Jae's jeans. He kicked off his designer sneakers. He lifted his hips. Yoochun peeled the jeans off, and sat back to stare at Jae's body. He traced a finger along the top of black boxerbriefs, contrasting in the dark next to pale skin. And then he took them off.
Their bodies were so different. Jae had broad shoulders, muscled chest, slimming down to a tiny waist. Yoochun was straighter, less contrived, muscles no less apparent but less manufactured. Less perfect. Jae's skin was pale and even, no tan line at his waist. No smatterings of sun-freckles on his shoulders. No hair on his chest or stomach or around his cock. And one of Jae's nipples was pierced.
Yoochun flicked it lightly.
Jae hissed in pleasure.
"When did this happen?"
Jaejoong shrugged. "A couple years ago."
"I like it."
Jae sat up and twisted a bit. "What about this?"
Yoochun couldn't see the details of the black ink on Jae's shoulders, but he trailed his fingers around the loops. “Looks painful.”
"Yeah. What about you?" Jae asked. "Anything new on you?"
Yoochun laughed. He took Jae's hand and placed it on his hip.
Jae's fingers traced the scar. Along the left line, and then the bottom, around the “K” and around the other side. “What the? How did you get branded?”
"Last spring, I was helping your dad and brothers new calves and this one was a little shit and was fighting and just before Junsu branded him, the calf twisted and the brand caught me instead."
Jaejoong laughed. "Oh my god, that must have hurt."
"Yeah."
Jae slid his hand further along Yoochun's back, lips pressed against his shoulder. "I wish I'd been there."
"To kiss it better?"
"No. To laugh at you in person."
Yoochun laughed, twisted around and pinned Jaejoong back underneath him. They kissed for long minutes. And then Yoochun moved to Jae's body. He explored every inch of it, first with hands and then with lips and teeth. He spent a lot of time playing with the piercing. Jae whimpered underneath him.
"You are so beautiful," Yoochun whispered, lips against the bend at Jae's hip.
"I know."
Yoochun laughed. He stared at Jae's cock for only a moment and then kissed Jae's thighs. His hand gripped Jae's hips, fingers curling to touch his ass.
"Kiss me, Yoochun, please, come and kiss me."
Yoochun slid up Jae's body. He pecked Jae's lips. "Anything else, city boy?"
"Fuck off. That wasn’t a kiss."
Yoochun trailed a finger down Jae's body. He swirled it around the skin just above Jae's cock. Jae's hips arched. He ran the finger down Jae's cock.
"Fuck, Yoochun, stroke me, please."
“Full of demands tonight,” he said and wrapped his hand around the soft skin of Jae's hard cock. He stroked up.
Jae threw his head back with a cry. "God, your hand feels good. Rough and, and, and-"
"And?"
"Perfect."
Yoochun smiled and kissed Jae's lips. "Those city boys are never going to be enough for you."
"I know. God, don't I know it."
Yoochun kept his strokes slow, letting Jae really feel his hand on every part of him. Yet their kiss was quick, needy, messy.
"Yoochun, god, let me suck on you. Please."
Yoochun shivered. It'd been three years since he last had a blow job. But Jae didn't need to know that. With a final twist of his hand, Yoochun rolled away, plopping down next to Jae. Jae gasped for a moment. And then he rolled to his side.
They listened to the rain, catching glimpses of small smiles when the lightning flickered. Jae ran a manicured nail up and down Yoochun's chest and stomach, swirling the pad of his finger on Yoochun's nipples.
"Fuck."
"Still like that?"
"I still like it when you do that."
Jae smiled. He leaned down and grasped one nipple in his teeth. Yoochun arched up with a cry as Jae sucked it into his mouth. He was less patient than Yoochun had been, leaving the nipples quickly, biting down his stomach. His fingers played in the hair next to his cock while his tongue swirled around the tip of Yoochun's cock, and it pulsed out a stream of precome.
"Eager?"
"Yes, and it's been awhile."
"Ah. Then I'll enjoy my late night snack."
Yoochun opened his mouth to reply but it was lost in a scream as Jae engulfed his cock. "Fuck, Jae!" he shouted as Jae took it all.
A few swallows later and a bit of pressure from Jae's thumb right at the base, and Yoochun was coming, moaning, as everything went darker, blacker than it already was. His breath echoed through the barn, overwhelming the pattering of rain.
Jae kissed up his body. He stopped at the spot right above his heart. He licked the skin before sucking it into his mouth. He bit down, sucking, gnawing, abusing. Yoochun’s hands wrapped in Jae's hair, not to pull away but to urge him on, press him closer. Jae finally pulled away.
Even in the dark they could both see the mark.
"There." Jae said and his voice broke. "Mine. My heart. At least until it fades."
Yoochun sat up and hugged him. Jae was shaking again. "It won't fade, Jae. Not where it matters."
Jae cried again.
The air temperature had dropped. Yoochun grabbed the edges of the blankets and wrapped it around them.
"I don't miss it," Jae whispered. "I don't miss the work or the dirt or the smell or the animal shit. I miss my family and I miss you and I miss right here and us like this."
"I'd miss the work and the dirt and the smell-"
"I know." They were quiet again. The storm had moved on, leaving only a light rain.
"Come with me," Jae whispered against Yoochun’s skin. "Please, god, come with me."
Yoochun said nothing. He lifted Jae's face and kissed him softly, an apology. A million things.
Chapter 3: Kiss Goodbye
Chapter 1: Coming Home
.
Pairing: Yoochun/Jaejoong
Rating: NC-17
Disclaimer: Not mine to tame, but I'm gonna try to ride 'em anyway. :)
Summary: You can't ever go home again. Ever.
Warning: Angst. I strongly suggest you have tissues handy.
Chapter 2:
this is where my grandma lives, and where i was while i wrote this fic
The day passed like all the rest. Muck the stables, milk the cows, change the water, put the horses through their paces while their dad was in town, and then load hay, eat lunch. Load more hay.
Thunderclouds had gathered through the day, randomly throwing raindrops on them. They covered the stacked bales of hay with a bright, blue tarp. It was rare when they had the baled hay stacked and did not have a new field of cut hay to bale before it rained. It was nice to know they wouldn't lose a day waiting for cut hay to dry.
The only difference on this day compared to the rest was that Yoochun thought about Jaejoong. Who he used to be. Who he was now, and Yoochun realized that he had no idea who Jaejoong was. He was the same, but Jaejoong was completely different.
When they entered the house for dinner, their mom said, "Yoohwan, what is this I hear about you applying to California schools?"
"Fuck," Yoohwan muttered so only Yoochun could hear.
"Well?" she stood with hands on hips.
Yoohwan looked at Yoochun.
Yoochun raised his hands. "This is your show, bro."
"And you," she said turning to Yoochun. "Jaejoong has called seven times. Seven. Whatever he said to piss you off I'm sure he didn't mean. And he said that he had to see you and that you knew where he'd be."
Yoochun turned away.
"I can't believe you're abandoning me," Yoohwan said.
Yoochun went to their mom. He held her shoulders."Yoohwan wants to go to college in California. He doesn't want to be a farmer like me. He wants to major in biology and study marine biology. He's bigger than this town, Mom. Let him follow his dreams."
"But he's my baby."
"He's nineteen. He needs to go."
She nodded.
Yoochun kissed her cheek. He walked away, slapping Yoohwan's shoulder as he went by. "There you go."
He went up the stairs, undressed, showered. All in a daze. He stood in the middle of his room wrapped only in a towel staring at nothing.
Thunder rumbled outside.
He had no desire to see Jaejoong again. And yet he knew he would go. They had been friends for twenty one years. He wore his nice jeans, a tank top. A plaid cotton button down.
His mom surveyed him after he'd gone downstairs to put his boots on. "Mrs. Kim says Jaejoong is going to Paris."
Yoochun nodded.
"And you're going to let him?"
He looked up quickly.
"When are you two boys going to learn there is very little you can hide from me?"
Yoochun smiled and then looked down.
"He will stay if you ask him."
"And I'd hate myself for it. He wants Paris. I want this."
She nodded. "Get going. He'll be waiting for you."
Yoochun grabbed a jean jacket and left the house and walked across the fields. He could have driven, but he needed the time to think. The sun was setting, throwing red and orange through the gaps in the storm clouds.
There was a patch of land, a deep gully, that separated their families’ farms. Near the gulch was an abandoned barn surrounded by wooden, decayed fencing. Yoochun hadn't even been out this far in two years. It was just grazing land for their cows and horses. It'd always been their place. Over the years, they'd added sturdier wood, stronger supports. It was never enough to actually use the building again, but it worked for two teenage boys who needed a place to smoke weed, drink beer and experiment with each other.
The first kiss was at fifteen.
Everything escalated from there.
Jaejoong always said he was going to get out of this place, laying naked with his head on Yoochun's chest. Yoochun sometimes agreed to his plans of escape, but they never went through.
And then one day Jae was gone. A friend of a friend had a place for him to stay, and Yoochun could say that Jae had never looked back.
Until now.
The old barn came into view. Jaejoong was leaning against it, smoking a cigarette. They stared at each other.
Rain splattered on the wood, fat drops darkening the light wood.
Jae was wearing jeans that probably cost more than Yoochun's entire outfit, and a blue t-shirt with a random splotch of green plaid on one shoulder. He hadn't seen last night, but in those jeans and that t-shirt, Jae's muscles were on proud display.
"You've bulked up," Yoochun said.
Jae flexed his right arm. "These babies pay the bills."
Yoochun smiled. "I'm sure your pretty face has something to do with it."
If he'd been closer, Jae would have hit him. "Don't call me pretty," he muttered and turned around. "Are you coming in?"
Yoochun followed him into the barn and up the wooden ladder to the loft. The beams creaked. There was a pile of fresh hay. A blue blanket was spread over it.
"You ..."
"It was all moldy and nasty," Jae said. "I ain't laying in that."
"Presumptuous."
A single, perfectly groomed eyebrow arched. "What are you here for?"
"To say good bye." not see you later
Jae threw himself on the blanket. "God, I shouldn't have come back."
"Probably not."
"You're not happy to see me?"
Yoochun shrugged. He sat on the wooden flanks. His fingers traced the words they had carved over the years.
The rain suddenly increased, pattering above them. Shadows were thrown around as lightning flashed. The clap of thunder was loud.
And Yoochun realized he was different than he had been three years ago. Somehow, being away from Jaejoong made him different. He was less rebellious, less spontaneous, less likely to see if he could walk across the decaying support beams just to see if they’d hold his weight.
Jae had yet to find his dreams, and Yoochun lived his everyday.
"So what now?" Jae whispered.
"I feel like you're waiting for me to ask you to stay."
"And?"
"You're miserable here, Joongie. You don't belong here."
"If you thought I'd stay, would you ask me?"
That was a difficult question to answer, so Yoochun didn't.
Jaejoong took a deep breath. "Will you at least act like you'll miss me?"
Yoochun chuckled. "I've missed you every day. I'm used to it. And you're not really here, so it's no different than two days ago."
Jae sat up. "What do you mean I'm not really here?"
"Your mind is already in Paris."
"And yours is thinking about how much this rain will help your hay."
Yoochun shrugged. "I'm a farmer, Jae."
"I need you to hold me."
"Why? And don't tell me you're scared. It may have been three years but I still know you."
"Then I'm selfish and I want you to hold me. I haven’t felt your body next to mine for three years. I want it."
Yoochun stared at him, looked down and then shook his head. He held his arm out.
"Don't give me a fucking pity cuddle, you asshole." Jae flung himself back to the blanket.
The storm was getting worse, wind increasing, lightning more frequent. One night they'd fallen asleep and woken up soaked. The next week they'd repaired the roof, at least the part over their makeshift bedroom.
Yoochun sighed again. He crawled over to the hay pile and lay next to Jaejoong. Jae grunted and rolled on his side. Yoochun followed him, propping up on an elbow. There was a good six inches between them. Jae's t-shirt had ridden up, revealing a strip of pale skin. Yoochun reached over and trailed fingers along it. The calluses on his hands were a stark contrast to the softness of Jae’s body.
Jae suppressed a shiver. "I thought you weren't going to do this."
"What else is there between us, Jae?"
Jae rolled over, eyes flashing in anger. "Did you just throw twenty years of life long friendship into a single night of fucking? Fuck you."
Jae tried to get up. Yoochun held his arm. Jae struggled, hay crunching underneath them. Jae was strong, but Yoochun made a habit of wrestling calves to the ground for branding. He had Jae pinned under him quickly.
"Don't make me hogtie you," Yoochun whispered.
Jae's mouth twisted. "You going to rape me then?"
"Don't be stupid. I love you, Jae. I always have and I always will, but there's three years between us. Three years of separation, and sometimes, if it's strong enough, love can make three years disappear, but it hasn't with us. In five more years, you'll be little more than my childhood friend, my first lover. We'll call. You'll come visit, and each time we'll be a little bit farther apart."
"Shut up. Stop it, and shut up." Jae's breath hitched.
"You know it's the truth."
"And you're saying it like it doesn't matter, like I don't matter, like nothing between us matters."
Yoochun smiled and moved hair off Jae's forehead. And then he kissed the flawless skin. Jae's arms went around him, fingers clutching at the back of Yoochun's shirt. He buried his face in Yoochun's shoulder, body shaking. Yoochun rolled over a tiny bit so he could wrap his arms around Jae. He held him tightly, tears dripping silently on his cheeks. The storm had settled to rain and wind. Thunder rumbled in the distance.
"I love you, Chunnie. You're the only reason I'm here." He leaned away.
Yoochun didn't hesitate to kiss him.
"I love you, I love you, I love you."
"Sh, Jae, I know you do."
"You're acting like you thought I didn't."
"I know you do. And I love you. Forever. No matter where you are. But-"
"No. No buts. Not right now, please. Just you love me, I love you. That's it. Right now, that's it."
"Okay." And Yoochun loved him, deepening their kiss, rolling them back over, Jae underneath him.
"Please, Chunnie. Say goodbye, long hard and hot enough that I'll never forget you."
Their lips melted, their mouths as one. They'd still been teenagers the last time their bodies had reacted to each other, and now they were men, harder hotter, more defined. More apt to know what they wanted.
Yoochun had been with one girl in the last three years, but he could tell that Jae had shared his body with more than one man or woman. But now, it was about them, re-exploring, re-discovering the way they fit together.
Yoochun moved his mouth to Jae's ear, lips ghosting down the edge, tongue licking the lobe. Jae's breath hitched again as Yoochun kissed his neck. His hands gripped the hem of the t-shirt. He pulled away, kneeling with legs straddling Jae's thighs. Jae sat up, and lifted his arms. Yoochun pulled the shirt over his head.
Jae tried to unbutton Yoochun's shirt as Yoochun ran calloused hands over Jae's shoulders. Jae tittered in annoyance and smacked Yoochun's hands. Grinning, he dropped his hands to his knees, watching Jae's face. He could tell that Jae was trying not to think too much. A pink tongue swiped along Jae's lower lip. Yoochun fought the urge to kiss him. Jae's hand slid up his chest to his shoulders and then down his arms, removing the plaid shirt. They roved over muscles, memorizing dips and curves in his arms and shoulders. Incredibly soft skin trailed up his neck, and then fingers tangled in his hair.
Jae pressed their mouths back together. Yoochun wrapped his arms around Jae's body, fingers digging into the muscles, pulling a needy moan from Jae's throat.
Wind shook the barn, a few rain drops blew in from between the old siding, landing cold on their skin. Lightning flashed and thunder clapped above them, around them and they both jumped, but didn't break apart.
Yoochun took off his tank top. Jae unbuckled his belt, and fought with the button on his jeans before it finally gave. The sound of the zipper lowering seemed louder than the storm. Jae touched his stomach and torso, moving along the muscles. A steady whimper escaped his throat with each new spot.
"God, Yoochun." He tried to push Yoochun's jeans down, whimpering when they barely moved. His hand gripped Yoochun's hip bones.
"I can say the same of you," Yoochun whispered, his rough fingers splayed over Jae's perfect abs.
They kissed again. Yoochun nudged Jae's body and he laid them back down. Jae finally pushed Yoochun's pants down enough to grab his bare ass.
"Hang on," Yoochun said, with a shiver. "I have to take my boots off." He rolled away and sat up. He pulled his boots and socks off, and then stood up to finish undressing.
"I told everyone about you," Jae said. "All my friends. And this one girl always loved to tease me about saving the horse and riding the cowboy."
Yoochun smiled. "Old joke." "I know, but I like riding you more than I like riding horses." Yoochun slipped out of his boxers.
"God, Yoochun."
It was dark, black, with light coming from flashes of lightning, but it was enough for Jae to see his body. Yoochun climbed back on the blanket. He kissed Jae's stomach, biting up tight muscles and quivering skin. Their lips met again. Yoochun unbuttoned Jae's jeans. He kicked off his designer sneakers. He lifted his hips. Yoochun peeled the jeans off, and sat back to stare at Jae's body. He traced a finger along the top of black boxerbriefs, contrasting in the dark next to pale skin. And then he took them off.
Their bodies were so different. Jae had broad shoulders, muscled chest, slimming down to a tiny waist. Yoochun was straighter, less contrived, muscles no less apparent but less manufactured. Less perfect. Jae's skin was pale and even, no tan line at his waist. No smatterings of sun-freckles on his shoulders. No hair on his chest or stomach or around his cock. And one of Jae's nipples was pierced.
Yoochun flicked it lightly.
Jae hissed in pleasure.
"When did this happen?"
Jaejoong shrugged. "A couple years ago."
"I like it."
Jae sat up and twisted a bit. "What about this?"
Yoochun couldn't see the details of the black ink on Jae's shoulders, but he trailed his fingers around the loops. “Looks painful.”
"Yeah. What about you?" Jae asked. "Anything new on you?"
Yoochun laughed. He took Jae's hand and placed it on his hip.
Jae's fingers traced the scar. Along the left line, and then the bottom, around the “K” and around the other side. “What the? How did you get branded?”
"Last spring, I was helping your dad and brothers new calves and this one was a little shit and was fighting and just before Junsu branded him, the calf twisted and the brand caught me instead."
Jaejoong laughed. "Oh my god, that must have hurt."
"Yeah."
Jae slid his hand further along Yoochun's back, lips pressed against his shoulder. "I wish I'd been there."
"To kiss it better?"
"No. To laugh at you in person."
Yoochun laughed, twisted around and pinned Jaejoong back underneath him. They kissed for long minutes. And then Yoochun moved to Jae's body. He explored every inch of it, first with hands and then with lips and teeth. He spent a lot of time playing with the piercing. Jae whimpered underneath him.
"You are so beautiful," Yoochun whispered, lips against the bend at Jae's hip.
"I know."
Yoochun laughed. He stared at Jae's cock for only a moment and then kissed Jae's thighs. His hand gripped Jae's hips, fingers curling to touch his ass.
"Kiss me, Yoochun, please, come and kiss me."
Yoochun slid up Jae's body. He pecked Jae's lips. "Anything else, city boy?"
"Fuck off. That wasn’t a kiss."
Yoochun trailed a finger down Jae's body. He swirled it around the skin just above Jae's cock. Jae's hips arched. He ran the finger down Jae's cock.
"Fuck, Yoochun, stroke me, please."
“Full of demands tonight,” he said and wrapped his hand around the soft skin of Jae's hard cock. He stroked up.
Jae threw his head back with a cry. "God, your hand feels good. Rough and, and, and-"
"And?"
"Perfect."
Yoochun smiled and kissed Jae's lips. "Those city boys are never going to be enough for you."
"I know. God, don't I know it."
Yoochun kept his strokes slow, letting Jae really feel his hand on every part of him. Yet their kiss was quick, needy, messy.
"Yoochun, god, let me suck on you. Please."
Yoochun shivered. It'd been three years since he last had a blow job. But Jae didn't need to know that. With a final twist of his hand, Yoochun rolled away, plopping down next to Jae. Jae gasped for a moment. And then he rolled to his side.
They listened to the rain, catching glimpses of small smiles when the lightning flickered. Jae ran a manicured nail up and down Yoochun's chest and stomach, swirling the pad of his finger on Yoochun's nipples.
"Fuck."
"Still like that?"
"I still like it when you do that."
Jae smiled. He leaned down and grasped one nipple in his teeth. Yoochun arched up with a cry as Jae sucked it into his mouth. He was less patient than Yoochun had been, leaving the nipples quickly, biting down his stomach. His fingers played in the hair next to his cock while his tongue swirled around the tip of Yoochun's cock, and it pulsed out a stream of precome.
"Eager?"
"Yes, and it's been awhile."
"Ah. Then I'll enjoy my late night snack."
Yoochun opened his mouth to reply but it was lost in a scream as Jae engulfed his cock. "Fuck, Jae!" he shouted as Jae took it all.
A few swallows later and a bit of pressure from Jae's thumb right at the base, and Yoochun was coming, moaning, as everything went darker, blacker than it already was. His breath echoed through the barn, overwhelming the pattering of rain.
Jae kissed up his body. He stopped at the spot right above his heart. He licked the skin before sucking it into his mouth. He bit down, sucking, gnawing, abusing. Yoochun’s hands wrapped in Jae's hair, not to pull away but to urge him on, press him closer. Jae finally pulled away.
Even in the dark they could both see the mark.
"There." Jae said and his voice broke. "Mine. My heart. At least until it fades."
Yoochun sat up and hugged him. Jae was shaking again. "It won't fade, Jae. Not where it matters."
Jae cried again.
The air temperature had dropped. Yoochun grabbed the edges of the blankets and wrapped it around them.
"I don't miss it," Jae whispered. "I don't miss the work or the dirt or the smell or the animal shit. I miss my family and I miss you and I miss right here and us like this."
"I'd miss the work and the dirt and the smell-"
"I know." They were quiet again. The storm had moved on, leaving only a light rain.
"Come with me," Jae whispered against Yoochun’s skin. "Please, god, come with me."
Yoochun said nothing. He lifted Jae's face and kissed him softly, an apology. A million things.
Chapter 3: Kiss Goodbye
Chapter 1: Coming Home
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