Delicate 3/?
Title: Delicate 3/?
Pairing: Yoochun/Junsu
Rating: NC-17
Disclaimer: They aren't my pets or my toys or my slaves and that is so unfortunate.
Summary: Yoochun's eccentric uncle passes away and leaves Yoochun his pet and money to take care of it. But the pet isn't anything Yoochun is expecting, and suddenly he has to figure out how to help someone else while his own life is a fucking mess.
Warning: implied abuse, slavery, and pedophilia. Both Yoochun and Junsu are 27 when this fic starts This fic isn't really angsty. I mean ... it's going to be emotional, but it's going to have a happy ending.
A/N: I have no idea how long this fic will be or when I will update it. It's just one of those fics that shoulda been a one shot but isn't going to be.
A/N2: Fic is for willowwing, baileymoyes and xtooline because they are awesome and I love them!
A/N3: I am tired and I don't feel like replying to comments, but I will. <3 to you all!
Poster credit goes to back-to-five!! It's gorgeous! <3
Part 3:
Warning: implied abuse, slavery, and pedophilia. Both Yoochun and Junsu are 27 when this fic starts
Yoochun paced back and forth in the small space behind his couch. He cursed mentally and out loud a few times too. He listened to the shower run as he stared at the balance in his bank account. His brain warred with his heart and his guilt, but guilt didn’t pay the bills. And it wasn’t like he was planning on ditching Junsu anymore and just using the money anyway, right?
That made it better, right?
Yoochun sighed. It was a horrible rationalization, but Yoochun still used the extra money to pay his phone bill and his Internet bill. The laptop in its case could be used again. He could show Junsu how to use it so he wasn’t bored while Yoochun was at work.
That still didn’t make it better, or lessen the guilt. It technically wasn’t his money. Even if he was going to be taking care of Junsu.
Yoochun sat hard on his bed and put his face in his hands to muffle his scream of frustration. He sat there until the water stopped running in the shower and he hastily stood up, still feeling guilty but having nothing to hide and nothing to chase it away.
When Junsu came out of the bathroom, Yoochun’s mouth went dry. The black jeans were molded tight to his body, showing off surprisingly strong thighs and the curve of a ass that almost had Yoochun whimpering. The shirt fit him well, showing off broad shoulders and a slim waist.
And Yoochun knew he hadn’t given Junsu any boxers to put on, so he probably wasn’t wearing any. Yoochun swallowed.
Junsu shifted, tugging at the shirt. “Clothes still feel weird.”
Yoochun blinked, his helpful mind imagining Junsu naked, and he looked away. “What?”
“Clothes. Up until last week, I never wore clothes.”
Yoochun’s mouth moved before his brain could shut it up, and he said, “I’m not sure I’d mind you naked all the time.”
Junsu frowned, bit his lip and looked away.
“Sorry,” Yoochun said hastily. “Sorry. Fuck. Just ... you’re gorgeous, you know?”
Junsu met his eyes. “You think I’m attractive?”
“Um, yeah. Sexy enough. I mean. It’s just ... you’re cute, and you have a nice ass ... and fuck. Sorry. I’m going to shut up.”
Junsu smiled tightly and turned away.
“I’ve completely offended you now,” Yoochun said. “I’m sorry.”
“No, it’s just ...” Junsu looked up and blinked rapidly, like he was trying not to cry.
Yoochun took a step toward him in concern and then stopped.
“It’s okay,” Junsu said. “I’m ... I’m not used to hearing ...” He took a very deep breath. “I’m used to hearing that I was attractive enough to fuck and touch and play with, but it was a good thing I never went outside.”
“Fuck, Su-ah,” Yoochun growled, not even thinking of the endearment, but it made the other smile. “I thought you said my uncle was good to you?”
“He was,” Junsu said, and then hugged himself. “In most things.”
Yoochun opened his mouth to say that emotional manipulation was not being good and then shut it. Junsu would learn. Eventually.
“Well, come on. You’ll see how gorgeous you are by how many people stop and stare.”
Junsu smiled and then frowned. “You won’t leave me? Out there?”
“Of course not. Seoul is pretty crowded, so stay close.” Yoochun finally turned away. He made sure he had his wallet, keys, and phone. As he slipped flipflops on his feet, he remembered that Junsu probably needed shoes, too. Luckily, he hadn’t yet thrown away his old pair. He kicked off the relatively new ones and motioned for Junsu to put them on his feet. “We’ll get you new shoes today, too.”
He opened the door, once they both had shoes on and gestured Junsu out. He did quickly, head lowered, and waited until Yoochun locked his door. Yoochun smiled at him, hoping it was reassuring and led the way down the hall and the stairs and out into the noisy dirty world. Two steps in front of them was the road with cars and people wove around them on the sidewalk, some bumping into him.
Junsu was suddenly plastered to his side.
Yoochun laughed and pried his arms off. “Hey, come on. It’s fine.”
Junsu tried to keep his arms around him.
Yoochun looked around and saw a few annoyed and disgusted looks shot their way. With Junsu’s pink hair, he was definitely going to stand out, and Yoochun did not want to give people more reason to stare.
He shoved Junsu to the side of the building carefully, and then stood right in front of him. “Look at me,” Yoochun said, and Junsu’s gaze went right to him. “Listen to me carefully, okay? I’m never going to order you around. I’m never going to make you do anything that you don’t want to do. But you do not understand society. Society does not accept gay people. Do you know what that word means at least, gay?”
Junsu bit his lips and nodded. “Same gender, together.”
“Yes. So you can’t hang on to me, okay? And beyond holding my hand, people will stare at you and at us, thinking we are gay.”
Junsu tilted his head. “But aren’t we? Or you? Or am I?”
“Yes, I am. But people in society don’t accept that.”
“Oh. Why?”
Yoochun sighed. “I ... I ... for a lot of stupid reasons that will take too long to explain. I think this is why my uncle left you to me, not that I own you or anything, but he probably did just because I’m the only one in my family that is gay, so he figured I’d like you.”
“Don’t you like me, Yoochun-ah?”
Yoochun smiled. “Yes, I do.”
Yoochun did not add a qualifier to that in anyway. Denying anything would make him a liar.
“I ... I can hold your hand?”
“Yes, you can. Come on. I don’t know about you, but I am hungry.”
Junsu nodded and held out his hand. Yoochun smiled and took it. They walked in silence to the shop he’d ordered from the last two nights. It technically had a name, but most in the neighborhood called it “The Ahjumma’s”. She waved hello to Yoochun from the window, and her nephew Jonghyun grinned at him and said hello and tried not to stare at Junsu’s pink hair.
Yoochun splurged just because there was money in his bank account and he ordered bulgogi for both of them. He directed them to his favorite table and let Junsu sit first before sitting across from him. Junsu stared out the window.
“There are so many people,” Junsu whispered.
Yoochun smiled and bit back a laugh. He had to remember that Junsu didn’t know much of anything. “There are more than eighteen million people in Seoul.”
Junsu visibly swallowed. “I ... I can’t even ... imagine that.”
Yoochun reached over and touched his arm. “It’s okay. Overwhelming, I know, but you don’t have to get used to this all at once.”
Junsu nodded.
Yoochun’s phone vibrated on the table and he reached for it, swiping the screen to unlock it. A text from Hyunjoong asking if he wanted to work extra hours that night. Normally Yoochun would accept and he almost did, before remembering Junsu. This was the first day to really get to know him, and he needed to if they were going to live together for awhile.
He sent: can’t tonight. have plans
A reply was almost instant: oooooh does Yoochunnie finally have a date?
Yoochun scowled at the text. He glanced up at Junsu, still looking out the window and smiled. He replied: something like that and then turned his phone on silent and put it in his pocket.
Jonghyun came over and put the laden plates in front of them.
Junsu looked up at him and smiled and said, “Thank you,” so sincerely that Jonghyun actually flushed and bowed and said that he hoped they enjoyed their meal so formally that Yoochun stared after him with wide eyes. Jonghyun was never formal with him.
Slurping noises came from the other side of the table and Yoochun looked over to see Junsu shoveling meat into his mouth with a spoon.
Yoochun chuckled. “Do you know how to use chopsticks?”
Junsu swallowed what was in his mouth and shook his head and then shrugged. “Maybe? I haven’t used them since I was young.”
Yoochun smiled and started eating his own food. “We’re already getting enough attention, but I have a few pair at home that you can practice with.”
“Okay, thank you, Yoochun-ah. I ...” Junsu looked away. “I thought about leaving yesterday.”
Yoochun frowned at his food.
“I did, but ... then I took the blanket off the window, and the city is so big, and everything is so crowded, and I knew that I’d be ... I’d be lost if you weren’t helping me, so I stayed, and I’m glad I stayed, and I’m so glad you’re helping me because you don’t have to. You could have kicked me out of the cab, taken the money every month. You didn’t because you’re nice, and I’m glad you’re nice and I like you.”
Yoochun felt his cheeks flush halfway through Junsu’s mumbled words. He squirmed in his seat and replied, “It’s the right thing to do” with his eyes still on his food. Yoochun spent the rest of the meal telling Junsu the names of the side dishes that came with the food and how to prepare each one, just to keep the conversation off other topics. He really liked the potatoes and the sprouts, so Yoochun let him eat all of those, while he ate the broccoli and the radish kimchi.
When they finished eating, Yoochun shouted a good bye to the Ahjumma and Junsu bowed and said how good everything was while laughing and smiling and shuffling out the door.
Yoochun thought for a moment that it was embarrassing, but it was too endearing and cute to be that embarrassing, and it made Yoochun smile. He headed toward the nearest street market. Clothes were cheaper there, and even though there was a fair bit of money in his account, Yoochun felt bad for spending it, and there wasn’t actually a guarantee that the money would keep being deposited into his account.
Yoochun showed Junsu how to withdraw money from an ATM and gave him all of it since it was technically his anyway. He led the way to the market, his hand held tightly in Junsu’s. Junsu was only half paying attention to where they were walking and craning his head to see all the signs and shops around. It was probably even more intimidating since Junsu could not read.
A group of businessmen jostled them and Junsu clung tightly to his arm.
“Are you okay?” Yoochun asked, surprisingly soft considering their surroundings.
Junsu nodded, but stayed plastered to his side.
Yoochun didn’t mind only because they were almost to the market, and then it was so crowded with people that barely anyone would notice if Junsu was glued to him. Yoochun went to his favorite stall, the one that sold knockoff name brand clothes for about the fourth of the price. It was run by Lee Donghae, a few months younger than Yoochun. He was cute and they had a couple of drunken flings when Yoochun had been lonely and vulnerable after his more than painful breakup.
But Donghae had made it very clear that he was not in it for the emotions and only in it for the sex. It had hurt, because Yoochun thought Donghae would help him chase his demons away, but as Donghae said back then, he wasn’t going to be anyone’s rebound, and Yoochun was grateful. Things between them definitely would not have worked out. They were much better friends.
“Hey, Donghae-yah!” Yoochun said.
“Yoochun-ah! How are you?”
“Good as usual.”
“You come to buy today or just perve over me like you normally do?”
“Buy, but not for me.” Yoochun tugged Junsu away from his side. “This is my friend Junsu. I was telling him about your awesome discounts.”
“Nice to meet you,” Junsu said and bowed.
Donghae grinned. “Friend, huh? Aren’t those your jeans he’s wearing?”
Yoochun scowled at him. “Shut up. Yes, but he’s just a friend.”
“I like your hair.”
Junsu smiled and patted at his pink hair. “Thank you.”
“So, Junsu-shi, what size are you?”
“Size?” He looked at Yoochun.
Yoochun cleared his throat. “As you said, those are my jeans. Go from there.”
Donghae smirked at Yoochun. “Sure, sure.” Donghae grabbed a pair of blue jeans off the table and gave them to Junsu. “Go on in there,” he pointed behind himself to a curtained area, “and try those on.”
Junsu bit his lip and looked at Yoochun.
“Go,” Yoochun said. “I promise I won’t leave.”
“Okay.”
Junsu clutched the jeans to his chest and went behind the curtain. Yoochun couldn’t see him, but with the way the light was shining in between the buildings, he could see Junsu’s silhouette. Bending over, taking off jeans, standing in nothing, because he obviously wasn’t wearing boxers.
Yoochun licked his lips.
Donghae cleared his throat. “Just a friend.”
“Fuck you,” Yoochun said.
Donghae laughed.
Junsu poked his head through the curtains and then came out. The pants were not buttoned, obviously too small, but showing off a triangle of creamy pale skin. His t-shirt had ridden up, showing a pale pink glint of a piercing at his navel.
“Fuck,” Yoochun muttered and glared at Donghae. “You did that on purpose.”
Donghae smirked. “Prove it. That pair was in the wrong pile.”
“Is something wrong?” Junsu asked. “They’re too small. Do you have a larger pair, Donghae-shi?”
Donghae looked at Yoochun for a moment longer and then said, “Yeah. Let’s get you a bigger pair.”
Yoochun moved around the tables and found a few inexpensive t-shirts for Junsu, some with writing on them and some just plain colors.
“Wow,” Donghae said. “Turn around.”
Yoochun looked up in time to see Junsu turn in a circle.
Donghae whistled. “Man, Junsu-yah, you have got an ass just made for Evisu jeans.”
“Fake Evisu jeans,” Yoochun said.
Donghae smirked over at him. “Did you see his ass in these jeans?”
Yoochun looked before his brain could tell him not to. He felt his mouth fill with water and he flushed, swallowed and licked his lips, choking a little. “Nice.”
“Nice?” Donghae said. “It’s god-like. Beautiful.”
Junsu blushed. “T-thank you. I exercise.”
“I can tell. Come on. How many pairs of pants do you want today?”
Junsu looked over at Yoochun, but Yoochun said nothing, waiting to see if Junsu would instead. Junsu thought about it, and then said, “How much are they?”
“The ones you’re wearing are ten thousand, but if you buy three pair, I’ll sell them to you for twenty-five.”
Yoochun snorted. Donghae never made deals, and he clearly saw a sign showing that each pair of jeans were fifteen.
Junsu bit his lips and then nodded. “Okay. I’ll get three pair. I like how they fit.”
“So do I,” Donghae said and grinned at him.
Junsu grinned back.
Yoochun rolled his eyes and fought back jealously. He was not jealous. Not at all. “Hey, Su, come look at these shirts.”
Junsu walked over to him and approved of them all, including the bright yellow one with cool black designs on it.
“Hey, Junsu-yah, if you buy those three, I’ll give you this one for free,” Donghae said. He held up a white t-shirt with the English words, “Fuck Me” on the front.
“No way,” Yoochun said.
Junsu frowned. “But it’s free. Isn’t that good?”
“Normally, but you are not wearing a shirt that says ‘fuck me’ in English,” Yoochun said.
Junsu looked at the shirt and then at Yoochun. He smiled at Yoochun and said, “I want it, and it’s free.”
Yoochun took a very deep breath. He couldn’t exactly tell Junsu he couldn’t have it. It was his own money.
“And I want this,” Junsu said, pointing at a hat with flower patterns that was hanging from a hook above his head.
“That’s for girls,” Donghae said.
Junsu pouted at Yoochun. “I want it.”
“Let him have it. It’s his money.”
Donghae looked between the two of them and then took a very deep breath. “I’m not going to even pretend I know what’s going on.”
“Good decision,” Yoochun snapped.
Junsu frowned, but didn’t say anything else.
“Your total is fifty, Junsu-yah.”
Junsu took out his money and bit his lip and then nodded his head for a moment, before finally handing Donghae five ten thousand notes.
Yoochun smiled despite the tension.
“I’ll go grab Yoochun’s pants from the changing area,” Donghae said. “You look much better in the ones you’re wearing.”
“Thank you,” Junsu said.
Donghae slipped toward the back of the stall and Junsu moved toward Yoochun. Yoochun looked at a display of belts.
“Are you mad at me?” Junsu whispered.
“No,” Yoochun said, maybe a little too quickly, but he was more mad at himself than at Junsu.
“Are you sure?” Junsu reached for his hand.
Yoochun pretended not to notice and moved away from him. “Yes, I’m not mad at you.” He reached up and grabbed the hat that Junsu had bought. It was a pretty hat. He moved back to Junsu and put it on his head backwards.
Junsu smiled widely.
“Gangster,” Yoochun said.
Junsu tilted his head. “What?”
“Nothing.”
“Am I interrupting a moment?” Donghae asked.
Yoochun stepped away from Junsu, looking down.
“Not one that can’t be continued elsewhere,” Junsu said.
Yoochun’s head shot up in surprise, and Junsu laughed and winked at him.
Yoochun’s heart expanded in his chest so fast with such force and with so many feelings that he barely cared that Donghae was laughing at him.
Junsu turned to Donghae and bowed low while accepting the bag. When Junsu turned to him, hat almost falling off his head, Yoochun smiled and held out his hand. Junsu took it.
“Just friends, my ass!” Donghae shouted after them.
Yoochun ignored him and steered Junsu further into the market.
---------
Yoochun opened the door to his apartment with more grace than he really had considering he was carrying three bags and trying to keep ahold of his iced coffee at the same time. Junsu laughed behind him.
“You could have put a bag down,” he said, entering after Yoochun. He set the bags down on the floor and kicked off the flipflops.
“Crap, we forgot to get you shoes,” Yoochun said.
Junsu laughed. “I doubt we could have carried more.”
“True.”
“Are you going to go to sleep, or can I take the blanket down?”
Yoochun smiled at that and said, “I’ll take it down. I need a cigarette.”
Junsu made a face and moved to the kitchen with the bags of food. Yoochun unpinned most of the blanket, bathing the apartment in late afternoon light. He opened the window and took a very deep breath before lighting his cigarette. It had been an interesting day.
Yoochun had not been upset, depressed, or tired. He didn’t spend his day drinking or binging while watching TV. It was fun and relaxing. Junsu laughed at so many things. He was excited for over many things. It was almost impossible to be in a bad mood around Junsu.
He looked over at Junsu.
All the cupboards, the small fridge and the freezer were open. Junsu stared at a can of something, and then looked in the cupboards, finding either a matching can or something close and putting the one in his hands away. Yoochun opened his mouth to say that he would do it, and then shut it. If Junsu needed help, he would ask for it. He stared back out the window, smoking his cigarette.
He finished before Junsu had the food put away, so Yoochun went to his dresser. They were going to need another one soon. For now, Yoochun shoved everything of his into two of the drawers, leaving the top one for Junsu.
“We also forgot to get you boxers,” Yoochun said.
Junsu looked over and shrugged. “It’s okay if I don’t have any. I probably wouldn’t wear them anyway.”
Yoochun took a very deep breath of control. “No, you need some. They’re used for more than just comfort, you know.”
“No, I don’t know. Remember?”
Yoochun cursed mentally. “It’s ... ugh, how do I explain this without being gross?”
“Your uncle used to piss on me,” Junsu said, “so not much you can say will gross me out.”
“They’re just for ... you know if you sweat or something. They protect your clothes from getting dirty.”
Junsu laughed. “That wasn’t gross.”
Yoochun rolled his eyes and sat on the couch with his coffee. He turned the TV on to some variety show with idols on it. He listened to Junsu move around behind him, putting clothes away in the dresser. Shutting the drawer.
“Yoochun-ah?” Junsu whispered.
Yoochun looked up at him. He looked nervous, biting his lip, wringing his hands and shifting from foot to foot. “What?” Yoochun asked.
“I can do what I want, right?”
“Yeah,” Yoochun said, brow furrowed in confusion.
“You won’t be mad?”
“Probably not. What do you want?”
Junsu met his eyes for a moment and then sat next to him on the couch. Yoochun froze as Junsu’s arms wrapped around his waist and he put his head on Yoochun’s chest. Junsu sighed, and Yoochun could just barely see the curve of his smile.
“Thank you, Yoochun-ah,” Junsu whispered.
Yoochun sat stiffly, mind warring with telling Junsu to move or not. But this is what Junsu had decided. He wanted it.
And if Yoochun was honest with himself, he wanted it, too. It was nice to be held. Nice to feel wanted.
“What are you thanking me for?” Yoochun said, voice husky. He tried to clear the lump from his throat.
Junsu looked up, chin digging into his chest. He smiled. “Today was a good day.”
Yoochun nodded.
“And ... and you didn’t push me away. And thank you. I ... I miss being hugged and cuddled and touched.”
Yoochun swallowed roughly.
Junsu put his head back on Yoochun’s chest. He shifted slightly, curling his legs up on the couch. Yoochun slowly lowered his hands, one falling to Junsu’s shoulder. The other gripped his own knee, the pressure just enough to keep him from toppling Junsu to the floor. The problem was that he wasn’t sure if he would follow Junsu down and see if he could get him to scream louder than the neighbor or if he would push Junsu away and hurt his feelings.
Letting him stay right in Yoochun’s lap was definitely the safer option.
Part 4: Situation
Part 2: Laughter
Part 1: Lace
.
Pairing: Yoochun/Junsu
Rating: NC-17
Disclaimer: They aren't my pets or my toys or my slaves and that is so unfortunate.
Summary: Yoochun's eccentric uncle passes away and leaves Yoochun his pet and money to take care of it. But the pet isn't anything Yoochun is expecting, and suddenly he has to figure out how to help someone else while his own life is a fucking mess.
Warning: implied abuse, slavery, and pedophilia. Both Yoochun and Junsu are 27 when this fic starts This fic isn't really angsty. I mean ... it's going to be emotional, but it's going to have a happy ending.
A/N: I have no idea how long this fic will be or when I will update it. It's just one of those fics that shoulda been a one shot but isn't going to be.
A/N2: Fic is for willowwing, baileymoyes and xtooline because they are awesome and I love them!
A/N3: I am tired and I don't feel like replying to comments, but I will. <3 to you all!
Poster credit goes to back-to-five!! It's gorgeous! <3
Part 3:
Warning: implied abuse, slavery, and pedophilia. Both Yoochun and Junsu are 27 when this fic starts
Yoochun paced back and forth in the small space behind his couch. He cursed mentally and out loud a few times too. He listened to the shower run as he stared at the balance in his bank account. His brain warred with his heart and his guilt, but guilt didn’t pay the bills. And it wasn’t like he was planning on ditching Junsu anymore and just using the money anyway, right?
That made it better, right?
Yoochun sighed. It was a horrible rationalization, but Yoochun still used the extra money to pay his phone bill and his Internet bill. The laptop in its case could be used again. He could show Junsu how to use it so he wasn’t bored while Yoochun was at work.
That still didn’t make it better, or lessen the guilt. It technically wasn’t his money. Even if he was going to be taking care of Junsu.
Yoochun sat hard on his bed and put his face in his hands to muffle his scream of frustration. He sat there until the water stopped running in the shower and he hastily stood up, still feeling guilty but having nothing to hide and nothing to chase it away.
When Junsu came out of the bathroom, Yoochun’s mouth went dry. The black jeans were molded tight to his body, showing off surprisingly strong thighs and the curve of a ass that almost had Yoochun whimpering. The shirt fit him well, showing off broad shoulders and a slim waist.
And Yoochun knew he hadn’t given Junsu any boxers to put on, so he probably wasn’t wearing any. Yoochun swallowed.
Junsu shifted, tugging at the shirt. “Clothes still feel weird.”
Yoochun blinked, his helpful mind imagining Junsu naked, and he looked away. “What?”
“Clothes. Up until last week, I never wore clothes.”
Yoochun’s mouth moved before his brain could shut it up, and he said, “I’m not sure I’d mind you naked all the time.”
Junsu frowned, bit his lip and looked away.
“Sorry,” Yoochun said hastily. “Sorry. Fuck. Just ... you’re gorgeous, you know?”
Junsu met his eyes. “You think I’m attractive?”
“Um, yeah. Sexy enough. I mean. It’s just ... you’re cute, and you have a nice ass ... and fuck. Sorry. I’m going to shut up.”
Junsu smiled tightly and turned away.
“I’ve completely offended you now,” Yoochun said. “I’m sorry.”
“No, it’s just ...” Junsu looked up and blinked rapidly, like he was trying not to cry.
Yoochun took a step toward him in concern and then stopped.
“It’s okay,” Junsu said. “I’m ... I’m not used to hearing ...” He took a very deep breath. “I’m used to hearing that I was attractive enough to fuck and touch and play with, but it was a good thing I never went outside.”
“Fuck, Su-ah,” Yoochun growled, not even thinking of the endearment, but it made the other smile. “I thought you said my uncle was good to you?”
“He was,” Junsu said, and then hugged himself. “In most things.”
Yoochun opened his mouth to say that emotional manipulation was not being good and then shut it. Junsu would learn. Eventually.
“Well, come on. You’ll see how gorgeous you are by how many people stop and stare.”
Junsu smiled and then frowned. “You won’t leave me? Out there?”
“Of course not. Seoul is pretty crowded, so stay close.” Yoochun finally turned away. He made sure he had his wallet, keys, and phone. As he slipped flipflops on his feet, he remembered that Junsu probably needed shoes, too. Luckily, he hadn’t yet thrown away his old pair. He kicked off the relatively new ones and motioned for Junsu to put them on his feet. “We’ll get you new shoes today, too.”
He opened the door, once they both had shoes on and gestured Junsu out. He did quickly, head lowered, and waited until Yoochun locked his door. Yoochun smiled at him, hoping it was reassuring and led the way down the hall and the stairs and out into the noisy dirty world. Two steps in front of them was the road with cars and people wove around them on the sidewalk, some bumping into him.
Junsu was suddenly plastered to his side.
Yoochun laughed and pried his arms off. “Hey, come on. It’s fine.”
Junsu tried to keep his arms around him.
Yoochun looked around and saw a few annoyed and disgusted looks shot their way. With Junsu’s pink hair, he was definitely going to stand out, and Yoochun did not want to give people more reason to stare.
He shoved Junsu to the side of the building carefully, and then stood right in front of him. “Look at me,” Yoochun said, and Junsu’s gaze went right to him. “Listen to me carefully, okay? I’m never going to order you around. I’m never going to make you do anything that you don’t want to do. But you do not understand society. Society does not accept gay people. Do you know what that word means at least, gay?”
Junsu bit his lips and nodded. “Same gender, together.”
“Yes. So you can’t hang on to me, okay? And beyond holding my hand, people will stare at you and at us, thinking we are gay.”
Junsu tilted his head. “But aren’t we? Or you? Or am I?”
“Yes, I am. But people in society don’t accept that.”
“Oh. Why?”
Yoochun sighed. “I ... I ... for a lot of stupid reasons that will take too long to explain. I think this is why my uncle left you to me, not that I own you or anything, but he probably did just because I’m the only one in my family that is gay, so he figured I’d like you.”
“Don’t you like me, Yoochun-ah?”
Yoochun smiled. “Yes, I do.”
Yoochun did not add a qualifier to that in anyway. Denying anything would make him a liar.
“I ... I can hold your hand?”
“Yes, you can. Come on. I don’t know about you, but I am hungry.”
Junsu nodded and held out his hand. Yoochun smiled and took it. They walked in silence to the shop he’d ordered from the last two nights. It technically had a name, but most in the neighborhood called it “The Ahjumma’s”. She waved hello to Yoochun from the window, and her nephew Jonghyun grinned at him and said hello and tried not to stare at Junsu’s pink hair.
Yoochun splurged just because there was money in his bank account and he ordered bulgogi for both of them. He directed them to his favorite table and let Junsu sit first before sitting across from him. Junsu stared out the window.
“There are so many people,” Junsu whispered.
Yoochun smiled and bit back a laugh. He had to remember that Junsu didn’t know much of anything. “There are more than eighteen million people in Seoul.”
Junsu visibly swallowed. “I ... I can’t even ... imagine that.”
Yoochun reached over and touched his arm. “It’s okay. Overwhelming, I know, but you don’t have to get used to this all at once.”
Junsu nodded.
Yoochun’s phone vibrated on the table and he reached for it, swiping the screen to unlock it. A text from Hyunjoong asking if he wanted to work extra hours that night. Normally Yoochun would accept and he almost did, before remembering Junsu. This was the first day to really get to know him, and he needed to if they were going to live together for awhile.
He sent: can’t tonight. have plans
A reply was almost instant: oooooh does Yoochunnie finally have a date?
Yoochun scowled at the text. He glanced up at Junsu, still looking out the window and smiled. He replied: something like that and then turned his phone on silent and put it in his pocket.
Jonghyun came over and put the laden plates in front of them.
Junsu looked up at him and smiled and said, “Thank you,” so sincerely that Jonghyun actually flushed and bowed and said that he hoped they enjoyed their meal so formally that Yoochun stared after him with wide eyes. Jonghyun was never formal with him.
Slurping noises came from the other side of the table and Yoochun looked over to see Junsu shoveling meat into his mouth with a spoon.
Yoochun chuckled. “Do you know how to use chopsticks?”
Junsu swallowed what was in his mouth and shook his head and then shrugged. “Maybe? I haven’t used them since I was young.”
Yoochun smiled and started eating his own food. “We’re already getting enough attention, but I have a few pair at home that you can practice with.”
“Okay, thank you, Yoochun-ah. I ...” Junsu looked away. “I thought about leaving yesterday.”
Yoochun frowned at his food.
“I did, but ... then I took the blanket off the window, and the city is so big, and everything is so crowded, and I knew that I’d be ... I’d be lost if you weren’t helping me, so I stayed, and I’m glad I stayed, and I’m so glad you’re helping me because you don’t have to. You could have kicked me out of the cab, taken the money every month. You didn’t because you’re nice, and I’m glad you’re nice and I like you.”
Yoochun felt his cheeks flush halfway through Junsu’s mumbled words. He squirmed in his seat and replied, “It’s the right thing to do” with his eyes still on his food. Yoochun spent the rest of the meal telling Junsu the names of the side dishes that came with the food and how to prepare each one, just to keep the conversation off other topics. He really liked the potatoes and the sprouts, so Yoochun let him eat all of those, while he ate the broccoli and the radish kimchi.
When they finished eating, Yoochun shouted a good bye to the Ahjumma and Junsu bowed and said how good everything was while laughing and smiling and shuffling out the door.
Yoochun thought for a moment that it was embarrassing, but it was too endearing and cute to be that embarrassing, and it made Yoochun smile. He headed toward the nearest street market. Clothes were cheaper there, and even though there was a fair bit of money in his account, Yoochun felt bad for spending it, and there wasn’t actually a guarantee that the money would keep being deposited into his account.
Yoochun showed Junsu how to withdraw money from an ATM and gave him all of it since it was technically his anyway. He led the way to the market, his hand held tightly in Junsu’s. Junsu was only half paying attention to where they were walking and craning his head to see all the signs and shops around. It was probably even more intimidating since Junsu could not read.
A group of businessmen jostled them and Junsu clung tightly to his arm.
“Are you okay?” Yoochun asked, surprisingly soft considering their surroundings.
Junsu nodded, but stayed plastered to his side.
Yoochun didn’t mind only because they were almost to the market, and then it was so crowded with people that barely anyone would notice if Junsu was glued to him. Yoochun went to his favorite stall, the one that sold knockoff name brand clothes for about the fourth of the price. It was run by Lee Donghae, a few months younger than Yoochun. He was cute and they had a couple of drunken flings when Yoochun had been lonely and vulnerable after his more than painful breakup.
But Donghae had made it very clear that he was not in it for the emotions and only in it for the sex. It had hurt, because Yoochun thought Donghae would help him chase his demons away, but as Donghae said back then, he wasn’t going to be anyone’s rebound, and Yoochun was grateful. Things between them definitely would not have worked out. They were much better friends.
“Hey, Donghae-yah!” Yoochun said.
“Yoochun-ah! How are you?”
“Good as usual.”
“You come to buy today or just perve over me like you normally do?”
“Buy, but not for me.” Yoochun tugged Junsu away from his side. “This is my friend Junsu. I was telling him about your awesome discounts.”
“Nice to meet you,” Junsu said and bowed.
Donghae grinned. “Friend, huh? Aren’t those your jeans he’s wearing?”
Yoochun scowled at him. “Shut up. Yes, but he’s just a friend.”
“I like your hair.”
Junsu smiled and patted at his pink hair. “Thank you.”
“So, Junsu-shi, what size are you?”
“Size?” He looked at Yoochun.
Yoochun cleared his throat. “As you said, those are my jeans. Go from there.”
Donghae smirked at Yoochun. “Sure, sure.” Donghae grabbed a pair of blue jeans off the table and gave them to Junsu. “Go on in there,” he pointed behind himself to a curtained area, “and try those on.”
Junsu bit his lip and looked at Yoochun.
“Go,” Yoochun said. “I promise I won’t leave.”
“Okay.”
Junsu clutched the jeans to his chest and went behind the curtain. Yoochun couldn’t see him, but with the way the light was shining in between the buildings, he could see Junsu’s silhouette. Bending over, taking off jeans, standing in nothing, because he obviously wasn’t wearing boxers.
Yoochun licked his lips.
Donghae cleared his throat. “Just a friend.”
“Fuck you,” Yoochun said.
Donghae laughed.
Junsu poked his head through the curtains and then came out. The pants were not buttoned, obviously too small, but showing off a triangle of creamy pale skin. His t-shirt had ridden up, showing a pale pink glint of a piercing at his navel.
“Fuck,” Yoochun muttered and glared at Donghae. “You did that on purpose.”
Donghae smirked. “Prove it. That pair was in the wrong pile.”
“Is something wrong?” Junsu asked. “They’re too small. Do you have a larger pair, Donghae-shi?”
Donghae looked at Yoochun for a moment longer and then said, “Yeah. Let’s get you a bigger pair.”
Yoochun moved around the tables and found a few inexpensive t-shirts for Junsu, some with writing on them and some just plain colors.
“Wow,” Donghae said. “Turn around.”
Yoochun looked up in time to see Junsu turn in a circle.
Donghae whistled. “Man, Junsu-yah, you have got an ass just made for Evisu jeans.”
“Fake Evisu jeans,” Yoochun said.
Donghae smirked over at him. “Did you see his ass in these jeans?”
Yoochun looked before his brain could tell him not to. He felt his mouth fill with water and he flushed, swallowed and licked his lips, choking a little. “Nice.”
“Nice?” Donghae said. “It’s god-like. Beautiful.”
Junsu blushed. “T-thank you. I exercise.”
“I can tell. Come on. How many pairs of pants do you want today?”
Junsu looked over at Yoochun, but Yoochun said nothing, waiting to see if Junsu would instead. Junsu thought about it, and then said, “How much are they?”
“The ones you’re wearing are ten thousand, but if you buy three pair, I’ll sell them to you for twenty-five.”
Yoochun snorted. Donghae never made deals, and he clearly saw a sign showing that each pair of jeans were fifteen.
Junsu bit his lips and then nodded. “Okay. I’ll get three pair. I like how they fit.”
“So do I,” Donghae said and grinned at him.
Junsu grinned back.
Yoochun rolled his eyes and fought back jealously. He was not jealous. Not at all. “Hey, Su, come look at these shirts.”
Junsu walked over to him and approved of them all, including the bright yellow one with cool black designs on it.
“Hey, Junsu-yah, if you buy those three, I’ll give you this one for free,” Donghae said. He held up a white t-shirt with the English words, “Fuck Me” on the front.
“No way,” Yoochun said.
Junsu frowned. “But it’s free. Isn’t that good?”
“Normally, but you are not wearing a shirt that says ‘fuck me’ in English,” Yoochun said.
Junsu looked at the shirt and then at Yoochun. He smiled at Yoochun and said, “I want it, and it’s free.”
Yoochun took a very deep breath. He couldn’t exactly tell Junsu he couldn’t have it. It was his own money.
“And I want this,” Junsu said, pointing at a hat with flower patterns that was hanging from a hook above his head.
“That’s for girls,” Donghae said.
Junsu pouted at Yoochun. “I want it.”
“Let him have it. It’s his money.”
Donghae looked between the two of them and then took a very deep breath. “I’m not going to even pretend I know what’s going on.”
“Good decision,” Yoochun snapped.
Junsu frowned, but didn’t say anything else.
“Your total is fifty, Junsu-yah.”
Junsu took out his money and bit his lip and then nodded his head for a moment, before finally handing Donghae five ten thousand notes.
Yoochun smiled despite the tension.
“I’ll go grab Yoochun’s pants from the changing area,” Donghae said. “You look much better in the ones you’re wearing.”
“Thank you,” Junsu said.
Donghae slipped toward the back of the stall and Junsu moved toward Yoochun. Yoochun looked at a display of belts.
“Are you mad at me?” Junsu whispered.
“No,” Yoochun said, maybe a little too quickly, but he was more mad at himself than at Junsu.
“Are you sure?” Junsu reached for his hand.
Yoochun pretended not to notice and moved away from him. “Yes, I’m not mad at you.” He reached up and grabbed the hat that Junsu had bought. It was a pretty hat. He moved back to Junsu and put it on his head backwards.
Junsu smiled widely.
“Gangster,” Yoochun said.
Junsu tilted his head. “What?”
“Nothing.”
“Am I interrupting a moment?” Donghae asked.
Yoochun stepped away from Junsu, looking down.
“Not one that can’t be continued elsewhere,” Junsu said.
Yoochun’s head shot up in surprise, and Junsu laughed and winked at him.
Yoochun’s heart expanded in his chest so fast with such force and with so many feelings that he barely cared that Donghae was laughing at him.
Junsu turned to Donghae and bowed low while accepting the bag. When Junsu turned to him, hat almost falling off his head, Yoochun smiled and held out his hand. Junsu took it.
“Just friends, my ass!” Donghae shouted after them.
Yoochun ignored him and steered Junsu further into the market.
---------
Yoochun opened the door to his apartment with more grace than he really had considering he was carrying three bags and trying to keep ahold of his iced coffee at the same time. Junsu laughed behind him.
“You could have put a bag down,” he said, entering after Yoochun. He set the bags down on the floor and kicked off the flipflops.
“Crap, we forgot to get you shoes,” Yoochun said.
Junsu laughed. “I doubt we could have carried more.”
“True.”
“Are you going to go to sleep, or can I take the blanket down?”
Yoochun smiled at that and said, “I’ll take it down. I need a cigarette.”
Junsu made a face and moved to the kitchen with the bags of food. Yoochun unpinned most of the blanket, bathing the apartment in late afternoon light. He opened the window and took a very deep breath before lighting his cigarette. It had been an interesting day.
Yoochun had not been upset, depressed, or tired. He didn’t spend his day drinking or binging while watching TV. It was fun and relaxing. Junsu laughed at so many things. He was excited for over many things. It was almost impossible to be in a bad mood around Junsu.
He looked over at Junsu.
All the cupboards, the small fridge and the freezer were open. Junsu stared at a can of something, and then looked in the cupboards, finding either a matching can or something close and putting the one in his hands away. Yoochun opened his mouth to say that he would do it, and then shut it. If Junsu needed help, he would ask for it. He stared back out the window, smoking his cigarette.
He finished before Junsu had the food put away, so Yoochun went to his dresser. They were going to need another one soon. For now, Yoochun shoved everything of his into two of the drawers, leaving the top one for Junsu.
“We also forgot to get you boxers,” Yoochun said.
Junsu looked over and shrugged. “It’s okay if I don’t have any. I probably wouldn’t wear them anyway.”
Yoochun took a very deep breath of control. “No, you need some. They’re used for more than just comfort, you know.”
“No, I don’t know. Remember?”
Yoochun cursed mentally. “It’s ... ugh, how do I explain this without being gross?”
“Your uncle used to piss on me,” Junsu said, “so not much you can say will gross me out.”
“They’re just for ... you know if you sweat or something. They protect your clothes from getting dirty.”
Junsu laughed. “That wasn’t gross.”
Yoochun rolled his eyes and sat on the couch with his coffee. He turned the TV on to some variety show with idols on it. He listened to Junsu move around behind him, putting clothes away in the dresser. Shutting the drawer.
“Yoochun-ah?” Junsu whispered.
Yoochun looked up at him. He looked nervous, biting his lip, wringing his hands and shifting from foot to foot. “What?” Yoochun asked.
“I can do what I want, right?”
“Yeah,” Yoochun said, brow furrowed in confusion.
“You won’t be mad?”
“Probably not. What do you want?”
Junsu met his eyes for a moment and then sat next to him on the couch. Yoochun froze as Junsu’s arms wrapped around his waist and he put his head on Yoochun’s chest. Junsu sighed, and Yoochun could just barely see the curve of his smile.
“Thank you, Yoochun-ah,” Junsu whispered.
Yoochun sat stiffly, mind warring with telling Junsu to move or not. But this is what Junsu had decided. He wanted it.
And if Yoochun was honest with himself, he wanted it, too. It was nice to be held. Nice to feel wanted.
“What are you thanking me for?” Yoochun said, voice husky. He tried to clear the lump from his throat.
Junsu looked up, chin digging into his chest. He smiled. “Today was a good day.”
Yoochun nodded.
“And ... and you didn’t push me away. And thank you. I ... I miss being hugged and cuddled and touched.”
Yoochun swallowed roughly.
Junsu put his head back on Yoochun’s chest. He shifted slightly, curling his legs up on the couch. Yoochun slowly lowered his hands, one falling to Junsu’s shoulder. The other gripped his own knee, the pressure just enough to keep him from toppling Junsu to the floor. The problem was that he wasn’t sure if he would follow Junsu down and see if he could get him to scream louder than the neighbor or if he would push Junsu away and hurt his feelings.
Letting him stay right in Yoochun’s lap was definitely the safer option.
Part 4: Situation
Part 2: Laughter
Part 1: Lace
.