FIC: Abandoned: The Re-Write ~ Harry Potter ~ HPLV/HPTR ~ Mature ~ Chapter 5
Title: Abandoned: The Re-Write
Author: Batsutousai
Rating: M/R
Main Pairing: Harry/Tom, Harry/Voldemort
Side Pairings: Ginny/Theodore Nott, Seamus/Blaise Zabini, past-Ron/Hermione, Hermione/Luna, others
Warnings: SLASH, mentions of child abuse/rape/torture, language, character death, minor Dumbledore bashing, Grey-to-Dark!Harry
Summary: A complete re-write of Abandon: Before the start of his seventh year, Harry Potter is abandoned in London by his muggle family and finds himself befriending Lord Voldemort.
A/N: This is, quite possibly, the shortest chapter of the lot. Whoops?
Also, I'm pretty sure I was supposed to post this two days ago? But I forgot. (Also, any work at the computer is twice as hard with scraped palms, let me tell you. I've mostly been sitting on my bed, rewatching Person of Interest and getting used to the new mobile since my scooter accident. ^^;)
In an attempt to not have to change up my ENTIRE CALENDAR, I'll be posting chapter 6, too.
In relation to the original Abandon, this covers the events of chapters nine and ten, and references an event in chapter eleven which doesn't happen in this version. ^^;
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Chapter Five: Seventeen and Answers
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Harry spent the rest of the week in a rut, worrying his hall mates and avoiding all questions pertaining to his wellbeing.
Finally, Thursday rolled in and Harry got up as early as ever. He made himself a quick breakfast and munched on it as he made his way out the front door and around the block to catch the Knight Bus. He'd already told his hall mates that he'd be out with friends all day, and possibly all night, too. For the most part, they all made noises of concern and told him reasons why he shouldn't go, but Rosie had told him simply that she expected him clean the entire hostel when he returned to make up for leaving her to do it all by herself.
Harry loved Rosie.
He took the Knight Bus to the Ministry and made his way to the transportation office, where he obtained his apparation licence. From there, he apparated to the Burrow and knocked on the kitchen door.
Mrs Weasley opened the door and smiled at him. "Harry, dear, it's wonderful to see you," she said, letting him in.
"It's good to see you, too, Mrs Weasley." Harry sat at the empty table and smiled at the cup of tea set before him. "Thanks."
"You're welcome, dear." Mrs Weasley turned back to the breakfast she was making, asking, "Did you want anything to eat?"
"Oh, I've eaten already," Harry replied with a shrug. "Before I went to the Ministry."
"You've already got your licence?"
"Yup."
"Congratulations."
Harry grinned at the woman's back and relaxed back into his seat, soaking up the simple feeling of home that he always got when he was at the Burrow. A part of him considered staying there for the rest of the summer, but he couldn't leave his friends at the hostel without a second housekeeper, and he didn't want to make Ron uncomfortable if his friend was still wary around him.
And I'd miss Tom, he admitted to himself and took a long sip of his tea.
The trick stair squeaked and Harry glanced up to see Ginny bounding through the living room and into the kitchen, eyes shining. Harry had barely managed to stand when his friend threw herself into his arms and hugged him, shouting, "Harry!"
Harry chuckled and hugged the girl back. "Good morning, Gin."
Ginny pulled back. "Happy birthday," she told him.
"Thanks."
The stairs squeaked again and Hermione followed Ginny into the kitchen, smiling at the sight of her best friend. "Happy birthday, Harry," she said as she gave him a hug.
"Thanks, 'Mione," Harry replied and let himself be shoved back into his chair and surrounded by the two girls. Mrs Weasley set plates down in front of the two witches and Harry sat back to listen as Ginny told him all about something Luna had done just a few days before between bites of her breakfast.
When Ron finally came down, he just stood in the doorway, eyes tired and wary as he looked at Harry.
"Ron, sit down," Mrs Weasley called.
Harry glanced up and took in his best friend's appearance, then said, "I'm sorry, mate."
Ron swallowed and looked away. "Yeah. Hermione told me."
Harry glanced over at Hermione before smiling at Ron. "Well, why don't you sit down and eat then, eh? You're starting to resemble me a bit."
That was the cue for Mrs Weasley to start in about how Harry never ate enough, and the familiar rant finally drew the faintest hint of a smile to Ron's eyes as he took his seat across from Harry. Mrs Weasley set a plate in front of him, then offered Harry some food again, to which Harry just smiled and shook his head, but accepted the plate of toast sat in front of him without complaint.
"So, we invited a couple of people over," Ginny said as Harry nibbled on his toast and Ron went after his breakfast like a man starved. "They should be here soon."
"Oh? Who all's coming?" Harry asked.
"Luna, of course, and Neville said for sure he'd be here. Dean said he'd try to make it and Seamus said he'd only come if it was okay that he brought his boyfriend."
"He's still dating that mystery Slytherin, isn't he?"
"Yeah. Hey, did you ever figure out who it is?" Ginny asked.
Harry shrugged. "I promised I wouldn't go looking," he reminded her.
Hermione snorted. "Yeah, sure. Who is it, then?"
Harry gave her his best wide-eyed look. "Are you accusing me of breaking my promise to Seamus?"
Hermione glanced around him at Ginny. "What did he make the promise on?"
"His Gryffindor honour," Ginny supplied.
Hermione raised an eyebrow at Harry. "Uh-huh. Spill."
Harry just grinned and leant back in his chair. "You'll find out when they get here."
"Harry, it's a Slytherin," Ron complained in a tone so much like the normal Ron that everyone in the room had to smile, even as Mrs Weasley snapped out, "Ronald!"
"So he is," Harry agreed. "Don't worry, it's not Malfoy."
Ron gagged, earning him another reprimand from his mother.
"So who is it?" Ginny pleaded.
Harry laughed and mimed zipping his mouth shut, making Ginny groan, Hermione sigh, and Ron roll his eyes.
The first person to arrive was Luna, and she smiled around at them as she took the breakfast Mrs Weasley offered her. Harry smiled at her and got into a convoluted discussion about shivelwigs with her that had the others at the table all blinking in disbelief.
Dean arrived next with a note from Seamus asking if it was okay if his boyfriend came.
"Give that here," Harry ordered and took the note. He conjured a quill and wrote a quick note without letting Ginny or Hermione see, then sent the message back to his roommate.
Three minutes later, the floo activated and an irritated Seamus came shooting through. "You said you wouldn't stalk me!" he complained.
The floo activated again and Blaise Zabini stepped through, looking uncertain and very much out of place.
"I didn't stalk you," Harry said drily, then turned to Blaise as the others all stared at the quiet Slytherin in surprise. "Welcome, Blaise."
Blaise blinked at Harry, clearly surprised, then let a small smile touch the corners of his mouth. "Thanks, Pot- Harry," he replied.
Harry smiled, pleased, then turned back to Luna, who was poking something above the table that only she could see. "Luna, luv, let the braetens alone."
Luna smiled a bit absently. "I'm hoping they'll multiply a bit more," she said.
There was a crack outside and then someone knocked on the door. Mrs Weasley let Neville in with a happy greeting and Harry waved at the other boy from where he was surrounded by the others.
"Happy birthday, Harry," Neville called.
"Happy belated to you, Nev," Harry called back. "Did you get your gift?"
"I did, thank you."
The teens all continued hanging out around the table for a while, chatting about this and that and getting to know Blaise a bit. Eventually, they all shuffled off to the field and pulled out the old brooms so they could start up a game with a dented quaffle and some conjured goals.
Mrs Weasley called them down for lunch and they all sat around the tables that had been brought outside. They were joined by Fred and George, and Blaise was quickly warned away from touching anything either twin had been anywhere near.
After lunch, Harry was made to open all his gifts and he laughed at the various things he'd received, thanking everyone.
After the gifts, they went back to playing their game with the twins joining in. There weren't quite enough brooms, though, so two people ended up on the ground with Hermione, Neville, and Luna, none of whom had any interest in playing.
Blaise and Harry happened to be down at the same time and Blaise led the birthday boy away from the others a bit. "Thanks," he said.
Harry smiled. "Sure thing. Why am I being thanked?"
Blaise smiled a bit at that. "For including me. Not making a big deal out of it. Seamus would have been heartbroken if you all had turned me away."
Harry nodded and looked up at the players in the sky. "I know. You're the first guy to have lasted more than a month with him, you know."
Blaise nodded, expression dark. "Yeah. I..." He trailed off, looking uncertain.
Harry looked over at him. "What?"
Blaise took a deep breath. "We almost broke up. If it wasn't for that attack, we wouldn't be dating any more. It... Students died..."
Harry reached out and touched the Slytherin's shoulder, eyes sad. "I know," he whispered.
Blaise looked up at him, expression hurt. "One of those Death Eaters... We were playmates. He was my friend."
Harry looked away, feeling sick. "I'm sorry," he whispered, and he wished he could make it better.
Blaise sighed. "Our fight was stupid," he admitted, and Harry didn't think he was talking about the dead Death Eater any more. "It was so stupid, and then that happened and I..." He trailed off again and rubbed roughly at his face. "Sorry. It's your birthday. I shouldn't-"
"Blaise," Harry interrupted, "what this day might or might not mean has nothing to do with this. What happened...it was horrible, and I'm going to tell you the same thing I've told everyone else who's been having a hard time of it: Talk to someone. Talk to me, if you want. It helps just to talk, and that's okay. Don't just sit on it."
Blaise considered the Boy-Who-Lived for a long moment and his expression cleared. "Yeah?"
Harry smiled. "Yeah."
Blaise nodded. "I'll look into that, then."
"Good. And owl me, if you need to. I haven't got a lot planned for the summer, and I don't want to see you and Seamus break up; he's so much happier with you, and you look happy, too."
A ghost of a smile touched the Slytherin's face. "I am."
"Good."
They walked back over to the others on the ground, Harry smiling reassuringly at the questioning looks Hermione and Neville were shooting him.
"Everything okay?" Hermione asked.
"Everything's good," Harry replied, and Blaise smiled a bit.
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Supper had included Mr Weasley and Bill, who was back in Britain for the year and dating Fleur Delacour. The French witch hadn't joined them, but the meal had been fun anyway. After pudding, all but the Weasleys, Hermione, and Harry left for their own homes, and Harry found himself being ushered up to the room he always shared with Ron to sleep.
But sleep evaded Harry, even before Ron's loud snoring broke the silence. Eventually, he climbed out of bed and made his way down to the kitchen, where he borrowed Mrs Weasley's teapot and made himself a cuppa. He was just sitting down to enjoy it when the trick stair creaked, and he turned to watch as Ginny stepped into the kitchen, looking sleepy.
"Hey. Shouldn't you be in bed?" Harry asked as he got back to his feet and pulled out another cup for her.
"Should be asking you the same thing," Ginny muttered and snatched his cup to drink from. She scrunched up her nose after a sip and put it back down. "Put sugar in mine," she demanded. "And more milk."
Harry smiled and set about making her tea exactly the way she liked it, then sat down next to her. He waited while she sipped at her cup and woke up a bit more before asking, "Why are you down here?"
Ginny scowled at him. "Why are you down here?"
Harry raised an eyebrow. "I asked first."
Ginny huffed. "Yeah, whatever. I'm down here because I heard you coming down."
Harry sighed and relaxed back in his chair. "I just couldn't sleep, that's all," he explained. "Nothing to worry about."
Ginny snorted. "Aren't you the one who's always telling people to talk about things?"
"There's nothing to talk about."
"Uh-huh." Ginny nodded, disbelief clear. "Start talking before I go get Mum."
Harry winced at the threat, then sighed. "I've an..." He grimaced, wondering what to call Tom. "There's this guy I've been hanging out with and, well, you know how the Order's always hovering about, worrying about me?"
Ginny smiled humourlessly. "You complain about it often enough."
"Hm. Well, yeah. This guy, he sort of hovers too, I suppose, but he's always being a prick and he doesn't hover quite like the Order and my hall mates at the hostel do."
Ginny blinked and took a moment to decipher Harry's meaning, then said, "He hovers, but it doesn't bother you, and you think it should?"
"That's the gist of it, yeah."
Ginny nodded. "Okay. What if, say, Hermione or I were the ones hovering like that?"
"You wouldn't," Harry replied automatically.
"Yeah. But what if this mystery guy was one of us? Or Ron?"
Harry paused to think about it. If Ron was the one hovering, he'd be pretty creeped out, and Hermione or Ginny would just irritate him, as much as he loved them both. "I'd tell you to piss off," he decided.
Ginny smiled at that; she'd seen Harry telling Hermione to back off more than once because she'd been hovering too much. "This guy must be pretty special, then."
"He's a right bastard," Harry replied, and Ginny could hear the fondness in his words.
"Really special," Ginny said, and a part of her cried, because she'd still hoped that Harry would one day return her feelings for him.
Harry just blinked at her. "He's not special," he said, uncomprehending.
Ginny stared at his confused expression and said, "Harry, I mean he's special to you. Important to you."
Harry blinked again, completely confused. "Huh?" Has Ginny guessed who Tom is? I've tried not to give his identity away...
"You've got a crush on him," Ginny said, deciding she'd have to be blunt. Harry was always so oblivious.
Harry snorted. "No."
Ginny frowned. Had she read everything wrong? "Harry, there are two sorts of people who most people sit up at night thinking about: Enemies and crushes. This guy isn't the former, so he must be the latter."
Harry stared at Ginny for a long moment, then looked away. "I'm not crushing on him," he said firmly, but even as he said it, doubt roared its little head. I can't be crushing on Tom, he insisted to that tiny monster. We're prophesied to kill each other.
Ginny watched the glimmer of fear in Harry's eyes and reached out to touch his hand on the table. He flinched at the contact - he'd always flinched, and Ginny had learnt not to make a big deal of it - and turned to look at her. "Oh, Harry..." she whispered.
Something in Harry broke at that and he leant forward to bury his head in Ginny's shoulder. An image came to him, supplied by his doubt, of him facing Tom on the battlefield. Of the knowledge that he could never raise his wand against the Dark Lord. He just hurt, because if he couldn't kill Voldemort, everyone else would die.
And then, in that terrible moment of realisation and hurt, an echo of concern touched him, and he could breathe again, because Tom was there. Not there in the Burrow, per se, but there for Harry, just as he'd been in that alleyway in France and when he saw that image of Hermione and when the twins had made him uncomfortable. It didn't matter that Harry wasn't sure he could kill Voldemort, because Tom was there, with him, and that meant everything in the world to his mixed up emotions.
Harry forced himself to just breathe and get his emotions back under control. When he felt that he was, once again, in control of himself, he leant away from Ginny and offered her a helpless little smile. "Sorry, Gin."
Ginny looked at Harry, needing him to be okay, wanting him to be happy. She didn't see happiness, but resignation, and that broke her heart. "Don't be sorry," she whispered.
Harry shrugged and turned back to his tea. He tried sending a sort of 'I'm fine' feeling across the link to the Dark Lord and immediately received an echo of disbelief back. He almost smiled, because Tom didn't believe his 'I'm fine' line any more than the rest of Harry's friends.
Ginny watched Harry and wished she could read his mind. He looked almost at peace, now, despite his near-breakdown. "Will you tell him?" she asked.
"Tell him what?" Harry asked, turning to her with a peaceful smile.
"Tell him you've got a crush on him."
"No!" Harry snapped, and his vehemence surprised them both.
Harry stood from the table and stalked over to the door to the yard while Ginny was still recovering from her surprise. He stood there, back to her, not saying a word. Finally, Ginny asked, "Why not?"
Harry shook his head, eyes tracing the outline of the full moon; he hoped Remus was okay. "He doesn't need to know," he answered her.
Ginny huffed. "Yeah? Well, what if I owled him-"
"Don't you dare," Harry hissed, turning to her, eyes blazing. "Gin, so help me, if you owl him about this-"
"I won't!" Ginny exclaimed, holding her hands up defensively. "I won't tell him." She didn't even know who the guy was.
Harry watched her for a long moment, suspicious, then nodded and returned to the table. "We should probably both go back to bed."
"Yeah. Okay." Ginny got to her feet and helped Harry put the cups in the sink to be washed in the morning. They walked up the stairs together and stopped just outside the door to the room Hermione and Ginny were sharing. "I don't like seeing you sacrifice your happiness like this," she told him.
"I'm happy enough with things the way they are right now," he replied. "Anyway, I swore at the beginning of last year that I wouldn't date until Voldemort is gone."
"But, Harry..."
"Goodnight, Gin," Harry said and made his way up to Ron's room on the next floor. He climbed into bed and eventually drifted off to the soundtrack of Ron's snores.
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Tom had been spending a lot of time at Fletch's bistro over the past few days. The squib had asked after Harry the second day, but Tom had just shrugged and commented, "He's busy with birthday things," and Fletch had left it at that.
During the days leading up to Harry's birthday, Tom had only felt the echoes of irritation and amusement that were Harry's usual state of being when he was at the hostel. On the thirty-first, he'd felt mostly echoes of fondness and pleasure, but there was one instance of sorrow and self-hate, and Tom had almost apparated to where Harry was. And then he'd remembered himself and been honestly shocked at that need to go and protect the teen.
What is wrong with me? he'd wondered, and spent some time cursing Death Eaters to help make himself feel more human. Or less human, as the case might be.
Late that night, he'd just about fallen asleep when he felt the echoes of a terrible hurt and understanding. Again, he'd wanted to go and protect Harry, but he knew he couldn't - the boy was staying with members of the Order and probably behind wards that would have a fit if Tom came within fifty metres of them - so he settled on focussing his concern on the link.
Harry's emotions settled after a moment and Tom relaxed. He hadn't liked feeling that hurt, and he wondered what had been done to Harry to cause it.
A part of him wondered why he cared.
Harry sent back a feeling that reminded Tom all too well of the few times he'd heard Harry tell someone he was 'fine', which really meant he still felt like crap, but he was determined to deal with everything himself. Tom sent his disbelief back and a feeling of quiet peace settled over him. He knew that the peace was an emotion of Harry's, but it affected him like it was his own and he found himself drifting off to sleep before he could fight the peace off.
The next morning, he woke with the echoes of peace from the night before, but also concern for the teen he was connected to. He set about getting dressed and getting some breakfast, then apparated to the hostel Harry was staying at. The boy wasn't there at the moment, but Tom knew he'd be there soon enough, so he snuck inside and up to Harry's room. There, he took a seat in the chair he'd created all those weeks ago beyond the illusion and resigned himself to waiting.
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Harry hummed to himself as he entered the hostel. Getting his things had actually proven to be rather easy, all things considered. Petunia and Dudley were both terrified of him - even more so, now that he could do magic without threats from the Ministry - and had pretty much stayed out of his way after Petunia let him in. Vernon had been at work when Harry arrived, so he'd had no reason to worry about the man's infamous temper, and he was quite glad of that. Able to use magic or not, he didn't want to have anything more to do with Vernon if he could help it.
Bill greeted him when he got in and he stopped to talk with the man for a bit, answering all the questions as to his day away with a smile. In spite of the realisations of the night, his birthday had been a lot of fun.
He finally made it up to his room after being stopped by almost the entire hall, and had to slam his door in Zack's face to get the other to go away.
"I still don't understand why you stay here," a voice commented from behind him.
Harry rolled his eyes, recognising Tom's voice as well as the feeling of the man being near, and turned to look at him. "They're my friends, even if they are obnoxious."
Tom sneered. "You're such a Gryffindor."
"Why, yes, I am. Thank you for pointing out the obvious."
A flare of rage echoed through the bond and Harry considered the Dark Lord for a long moment, wondering what he'd do. Harry was a legal adult now, as far as the magical world was concerned; their truce could easily be over, if Tom decided he didn't need Harry's answers. Or even if he decided that torturing the answers out of Harry would be simpler.
For his part, Tom was fighting with himself; on one hand, he hated being spoken to so flippantly, and Harry knew it - had used it to his advantage more than once to rile the Dark Lord up both before and during the summer - but, on the other hand, he didn't want to lose this...this strange companionship between them, and he knew that letting his anger rule him would destroy it.
They'd come to a bridge, and it could be burned down, or crossed. And neither of them knew what waited on the other side.
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A/N: Muwahahahahahah!!
As if fans of the original can't guess how this is gonna turn out, jeebus. ^^;
~Bats ^.^x
Abandon & Reclaim Series:
Abandon the Prequel: Sixth Year
Abandon chapter 01
Reclaim chapter One
Abandoned Chapters:
One || Two || Three || Four || Five || Six || Seven || Eight || Nine || Ten
Eleven || Twelve || Thirteen || Fourteen || Fifteen || Sixteen || Seventeen || Eighteen || Nineteen || Twenty
INCOMPLETE
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