Comments | batfic_contest: Theme 19: Metropolis

peter_24601 in batfic_contest

Theme 19: Metropolis

Oct 28, 2008 11:41

Title: A Special Occasion
Universe: DCAU (DC Animated Universe)
Rating: PG
Characters/Pairings: Clark Kent, Lois Lane, Bruce Wayne
Word Count: 499
Summary: Clark goes out, and gets an earful for it...

( A Special Occasion )

universe: dcau, theme 19: metropolis, characters: batman+superman

Comments 4

amara_anon October 28 2008, 18:15:09 UTC

LOL, nice ending. I really like the pacing and flow of the dialogue, this story moved along nicely and was easy to picture happening. Great tension between Clark and Lois, this was a fun read.

If it's not too much trouble, would you mind adding a genre to your entry? It makes it faster for me when I archive the entries in the Memories, thanks.

agent0fchaos November 5 2008, 22:21:22 UTC

I'm not much of a Superman fan, but this was very cute & funny. I could see it in the comic adaptations of the DCAU as like a little two page side story :D nice job!

skund November 7 2008, 22:50:05 UTC

I liked it, but I adore anything that gets Bruce and Clark in the same room together so I'm a little biased.

Lois is well written, I like how she jumps straight to conclusions and goes on the offensive.

A great little 'moment in time' story. :)

freddylloyd November 8 2008, 00:53:11 UTC

For me this has a historic feel, with the "Golden Age" rivalry/relationship of Lois and Clark (probably also preserved in the cartoons). Lois is a good enough reporter and Bruce famous enough that she might recognize him without having to be told. All three personalities come through strong.

This is a small detail, but it might come in handy for future writing in other forums. If you've got a complete sentence next to a bit of dialogue, you don't need to connect them with a comma. They stand as separate sentences. If you've got a "said" or similar verb looking for dialogue, that's when there's only one sentence, which needs a comma at the edge of the dialogue.

EXAMPLES:
The Joker asked, "Why so serious?"
The Joker smiled and said, "Why so serious?"
The Joker smiled while saying, "Why so serious?"
The Joker smiled. "Why so serious?