Skinny Mean Man, Ch. 5
I feel bad.
Because this is all I have to offer.
I didn't even write a one-shot to give you all today.
Today was wonderful though, as I logged on to two new fics, one from politelypuzzled and the other from
impala_chick with dedications to me.
That was lovely, and they were both great, so if you haven't read them yet, I suggest you hit them hard!
"Matt, really," Nick clutched his shoulders tightly, his knees weak as his mouth attacked his neck. The wall against his back was cold, and an edge of brick cut into his shoulder blade unforgivingly. "I need to get back."
Matt's response was to kiss him hard, fisting his fingers in his hair, bumping his head against the wall, leaving him feeling a little dazed. It was the kind of kiss that didn't just leave him breathless but seemed to suck all of the air out of his lungs, deflating him in so many ways. "I'm sure they already went to bed; no one would wait up this late." Matt growled, jerking his head to the side, turning the kiss somehow more savage.
Nick's brain seemed to have stopped functioning. Some part of his mind recognized the rank wet smell of the alley; the darkness they were hidden in; the fact that Joe was probably pacing their room, worried sick; how exhausted he was; how much trouble he was going to think this wasn't worth come daylight. But, right now, everything about Matt seemed slow and intense and harsh, and for some reason, that was the only way he could possibly have wanted it. He was enraptured.
So, the footsteps thundering down the street seemed far-away, but then were gone, and not in that slow fading way like they were moving off, but abruptly, like those feet stopped moving. Nick didn't notice them clearly enough, due to them not being the hot wetness of Matt's tongue in his mouth, so the only emotion to register in his slowly-whirling mind was surprise when Matt's body wasn't there anymore, and Kevin yelling was.
"What the fuck are you doing, Nick?" he shouted into his face.
Nick couldn't think of an answer, still caught off-guard by his brother's presence. He was glad for the loud tone; the words wouldn't have made sense to him except by being pounded into his brain.
"It's almost four in the morning!" Kevin continued, heat rising visibly into his face. "What were you thinking, Nick? Joe hasn't slept at all, and how terrifying do you think it was to be woken up so he could tell me you didn't come back? We've been worried fucking sick! And, you!" He rounded suddenly on Matt, who coolly stood his ground. "Who the fuck do you think you are, keeping a fifteen-year-old out until all hours of the night?"
Nick was tuning out now that Kevin's fury wasn't directed at him. His head hurt from pressing into the bricks of the wall, or maybe it was exhaustion, or something else entirely, and he leaned wearily against it, eyes wandering. That was when he first noticed Joe standing at the end of the alley, his face half in shadow, so still and silent that he might not have been real at all, just another carefully-posed photo that didn't quite capture how attractive and charismatic he actually was. But, this couldn't have been a photo, because in front of a camera, Joe would never look so defeated, so much like he wanted to run away. The darkness seemed to cling to him, like it was sure he never wanted to be in the spotlight again.
With Nick's eyes on him, he shifted, just slightly, like he didn't want to be seen, really couldn't have been more mortified to have been caught watching the scene before him, like an animal ready to make a run for it if he had to. His face was void of emotion like he was afraid to feel any, but something in his eyes, a dullness that hadn't existed before, like a light had gone out, made Nick think of heartbreak. The look didn't make sense to him, but he couldn't quite put together why.
Then, Kevin's tirade ended, and he took a tight hold of his elbow, pulling him along, out of the alley and into the bright lights of Michigan Avenue. Nick stumbled all the way back to the hotel. Kevin showed him no mercy. Joe said nothing.
-----------
"Did you stop to think just once that we might be wondering where you are?"
Nick really wished Kevin would stop yelling. His headache was a good deal more intense, and every word rang throbbing through his brain. He put a hand, still cool from the night air, against his forehead, squeezing his eyes shut as he lay back against his pillows. It didn't really help.
"And, besides how worried we were that something had happened to you, did you stop for a second to consider the possibility of someone seeing you?" His brother paced. "Not just police, but paparazzi! You could have royally screwed all of us over!"
"That's why we were hiding." Nick mumbled, the first words he'd spoken since they got back to the hotel.
"Hiding?" Kevin laughed bitterly. "We found you, didn't we? They could have too!" He ran his hand through his hair, letting out a frustrated sigh. He seemd at a loss for anything to say, any more ways to attempt to make him feel awful. "The only reason I covered for you to go out like this was because you're smart and have always been responsible, and I trusted you. Hell knows I won't make that mistake again. Both of you, go to bed." The door slammed little too loudly as he left the room, making Nick's ears ring.
Joe, who had been sitting cross-legged in the armchair in the corner, silent, unfolded himself to pad barefoot across the room, and disappeared behind the bathroom door.
Nick sighed, dragging himself to his feet and shimmying out of his jeans. He was pulling his pajama pants on when his brother reentered. "Hey, Joe?"
He didn't say anything, his back to him as he stuffed his clothes into his suitcase.
Nick sighed again, looking down at his toes, watching them as he moved closer to his brother, the silence between them stinging like alcohol. He needed to be more aware of Joe's feelings in all of this. He hated it when he was angry at him. "Joe, I'm so sorry. I said I'd be back, and I didn't come, and I'm not sure how my phone got turned off, but it was stupid and inconsiderate not to make sure you could reach me." He lifted his head to find his brother looking at him, and he was struck for the first time by the fact that their eyes weren't the exact same shade of brown, as he'd always thought they were. Joe's were darker, more intense. "I'm sorry. I wouldn't blame you if you never spoke to me aga-"
His words caught in his throat as Joe pulled him into his arms, holding him close, his face pressed against his curly hair, like he was afraid he'd never have the chance again. "I'm so glad you're okay."
Because this is all I have to offer.
I didn't even write a one-shot to give you all today.
Today was wonderful though, as I logged on to two new fics, one from politelypuzzled and the other from
impala_chick with dedications to me.
That was lovely, and they were both great, so if you haven't read them yet, I suggest you hit them hard!
"Matt, really," Nick clutched his shoulders tightly, his knees weak as his mouth attacked his neck. The wall against his back was cold, and an edge of brick cut into his shoulder blade unforgivingly. "I need to get back."
Matt's response was to kiss him hard, fisting his fingers in his hair, bumping his head against the wall, leaving him feeling a little dazed. It was the kind of kiss that didn't just leave him breathless but seemed to suck all of the air out of his lungs, deflating him in so many ways. "I'm sure they already went to bed; no one would wait up this late." Matt growled, jerking his head to the side, turning the kiss somehow more savage.
Nick's brain seemed to have stopped functioning. Some part of his mind recognized the rank wet smell of the alley; the darkness they were hidden in; the fact that Joe was probably pacing their room, worried sick; how exhausted he was; how much trouble he was going to think this wasn't worth come daylight. But, right now, everything about Matt seemed slow and intense and harsh, and for some reason, that was the only way he could possibly have wanted it. He was enraptured.
So, the footsteps thundering down the street seemed far-away, but then were gone, and not in that slow fading way like they were moving off, but abruptly, like those feet stopped moving. Nick didn't notice them clearly enough, due to them not being the hot wetness of Matt's tongue in his mouth, so the only emotion to register in his slowly-whirling mind was surprise when Matt's body wasn't there anymore, and Kevin yelling was.
"What the fuck are you doing, Nick?" he shouted into his face.
Nick couldn't think of an answer, still caught off-guard by his brother's presence. He was glad for the loud tone; the words wouldn't have made sense to him except by being pounded into his brain.
"It's almost four in the morning!" Kevin continued, heat rising visibly into his face. "What were you thinking, Nick? Joe hasn't slept at all, and how terrifying do you think it was to be woken up so he could tell me you didn't come back? We've been worried fucking sick! And, you!" He rounded suddenly on Matt, who coolly stood his ground. "Who the fuck do you think you are, keeping a fifteen-year-old out until all hours of the night?"
Nick was tuning out now that Kevin's fury wasn't directed at him. His head hurt from pressing into the bricks of the wall, or maybe it was exhaustion, or something else entirely, and he leaned wearily against it, eyes wandering. That was when he first noticed Joe standing at the end of the alley, his face half in shadow, so still and silent that he might not have been real at all, just another carefully-posed photo that didn't quite capture how attractive and charismatic he actually was. But, this couldn't have been a photo, because in front of a camera, Joe would never look so defeated, so much like he wanted to run away. The darkness seemed to cling to him, like it was sure he never wanted to be in the spotlight again.
With Nick's eyes on him, he shifted, just slightly, like he didn't want to be seen, really couldn't have been more mortified to have been caught watching the scene before him, like an animal ready to make a run for it if he had to. His face was void of emotion like he was afraid to feel any, but something in his eyes, a dullness that hadn't existed before, like a light had gone out, made Nick think of heartbreak. The look didn't make sense to him, but he couldn't quite put together why.
Then, Kevin's tirade ended, and he took a tight hold of his elbow, pulling him along, out of the alley and into the bright lights of Michigan Avenue. Nick stumbled all the way back to the hotel. Kevin showed him no mercy. Joe said nothing.
-----------
"Did you stop to think just once that we might be wondering where you are?"
Nick really wished Kevin would stop yelling. His headache was a good deal more intense, and every word rang throbbing through his brain. He put a hand, still cool from the night air, against his forehead, squeezing his eyes shut as he lay back against his pillows. It didn't really help.
"And, besides how worried we were that something had happened to you, did you stop for a second to consider the possibility of someone seeing you?" His brother paced. "Not just police, but paparazzi! You could have royally screwed all of us over!"
"That's why we were hiding." Nick mumbled, the first words he'd spoken since they got back to the hotel.
"Hiding?" Kevin laughed bitterly. "We found you, didn't we? They could have too!" He ran his hand through his hair, letting out a frustrated sigh. He seemd at a loss for anything to say, any more ways to attempt to make him feel awful. "The only reason I covered for you to go out like this was because you're smart and have always been responsible, and I trusted you. Hell knows I won't make that mistake again. Both of you, go to bed." The door slammed little too loudly as he left the room, making Nick's ears ring.
Joe, who had been sitting cross-legged in the armchair in the corner, silent, unfolded himself to pad barefoot across the room, and disappeared behind the bathroom door.
Nick sighed, dragging himself to his feet and shimmying out of his jeans. He was pulling his pajama pants on when his brother reentered. "Hey, Joe?"
He didn't say anything, his back to him as he stuffed his clothes into his suitcase.
Nick sighed again, looking down at his toes, watching them as he moved closer to his brother, the silence between them stinging like alcohol. He needed to be more aware of Joe's feelings in all of this. He hated it when he was angry at him. "Joe, I'm so sorry. I said I'd be back, and I didn't come, and I'm not sure how my phone got turned off, but it was stupid and inconsiderate not to make sure you could reach me." He lifted his head to find his brother looking at him, and he was struck for the first time by the fact that their eyes weren't the exact same shade of brown, as he'd always thought they were. Joe's were darker, more intense. "I'm sorry. I wouldn't blame you if you never spoke to me aga-"
His words caught in his throat as Joe pulled him into his arms, holding him close, his face pressed against his curly hair, like he was afraid he'd never have the chance again. "I'm so glad you're okay."