Summer. Lonely. A whole post about it. Sounds fun, right?

[bananacosmic]

It's 1:15 in the morning.

Comments

[bananacosmic]

Thank you - no, it doesn't make me feel uncomfortable; I can happily take a compliment. So thanks :)

I don't have the excuse of living somewhere far away (living smack dab in the middle of the city, pretty much). Sometimes, I think I wish I did ^^ As it is, people look at me strangely every time I do something they think can't be done alone. Where do you live?

*hugs*

[tuawahine]

I do lots of things alone, and I get that reaction sometimes, too. Sometimes it's that I ask people and nobody wants to come, but often it's because I actually prefer to be alone. Besides, it would be seriously limiting if I could only do stuff if somebody else comes along. Makes me feel like a Victorian maiden not allowed to go anywhere unchaperoned. Gah!

[bananacosmic]

*g* Victorian maiden... agreed. I guess people just aren't used to doing things on their own. Doesn't help when girls don't seem to be able to go to the bathroom without bringing a friend.

[xanthe]

I go loads of places on my own and love it. People often say I'm "brave" to do it but I just want to do stuff and enjoy my life and there isn't always anyone I want to ask or anyone who'd want to come.

I do also have a lot of friends to do things with but I have a very high tolerance for being on my own. Sometimes I crave it and have to go to ground in my house for days on end to connect back with myself after a busy patch.

I found that reading works on "positive psychology" helped me a lot when I was going through a bad patch. Books by Martin Seligman were a great help. These aren't self help books - they're proper psychological studies about happiness and how to achieve it! http://www.authentichappiness.sas.upenn.edu/Default.aspx

Give yourself a break though - you're smart, pretty, talented and you give your free time to help cats! That last one in particular makes you a really special person in my book :-)

[bananacosmic]

I don't mind going out and being on my own - I've gone to the movies, to the beach, gone shopping, travelled, all on my own. I guess what I want more is the option to do it with someone; that's what I feel is lacking at the moment (and where I fail, because I don't settle with people I find boring, like others seem to - I don't know how many times I've heard, "I've gotta call X, because we haven't talked in a while and I really should." - should, not want.)

Thanks for the book suggestion, I'll look at it :)

And thanks *hugs*

[nakeisha]

I can relate to a fair bit of what you say here, the social bit and standing outside the group, that kind of thing, and what do people see in me, plus, as you know and said the whole 'real life' thing. So I can sympathise and empathise with you over it. That isn't any great solution, but I can at least say 'I understand' and mean it. You're not alone in those feelings.

I echo luthien92's comment, you really are a very lovely looking lady, truly you are. And clearly a very caring and compassionate and loving one

[bananacosmic]

Understanding goes a long way, so that's very okay. Writing down what I feel and having people respond makes me feel less alone.

Thank you *hugs*

Yeah, that was awful. It took me something like six months to get back completely afterwards. I never want to go through that again.

Thank you very much for all your supportive words. I don't really know what else to say, other than that I appreciate it *hugs*

[shriker_tam]

I also have one person who might be reading this and might be seeing me on Wednesday, if she doesn't feel I'm wading way too deep in my own self-pity...

Dumbass. If I wasn't allready seeing you soon, I'd have suggested it more now :o)

Other than that - your post rings a bell. I guess it's hard to see, because I'm such a lame coupled-up person now, but I used to be very solitary, and I also always feel like I'm on the outside looking in. I have about 3 people I hang out with with any regularity, and one of them lives with me, so he pretty much has to ;o)

And my brother has the social skills from awesomeland too...I got all the, uh, awkward from the genepool - he got all the sociability and ambition.

[bananacosmic]

Well, I'm pretty much a certified dumbass, as is obvious by the whole post ;)

Nope, it doesn't show these days. And it kinda sucks when all my friends are coupled off, because it makes them (you ;p) that much more prone to staying at home with your SOs. I don't begrudge anyone their SOs, I just kinda wish I had one sometimes, or that not everyone else had one.

What is it with brothers and social skills from awesomeland? It's completely unfair.

[shriker_tam]

And it kinda sucks when all my friends are coupled off, because it makes them (you ;p) that much more prone to staying at home with your SOs.

Honestly, I wasn't a bit better single :o) Except I hung out at home by myself instead of with a bf...

[bananacosmic]

I shouldn't say anything because I'm very prone to sitting by myself at home as well :)