Comments | badfic_quotes: A Masterpiece of the Absurd

carey_pontmercy in badfic_quotes

A Masterpiece of the Absurd

Apr 14, 2010 01:16

I bring you an AU about pears, birds, and...vampires? It's hard to tell through the thick fog of WTF that envelops this fic. In the author's defense, it's labeled humor, but it's so bizarre that I thought it might be worth sharing.

The Demon Barber Is Alive!
Sweeney and Nellie never died. This is set 1yr after the movie. she loves him, he loves her ( Read more... )

sweeney todd

Comments 7

guardians_song April 14 2010, 06:39:34 UTC

Eleven chapters later, the fic ends (for now, anyway) exactly as it should: with Mr. Todd's gay apprentice (who cuts himself because he hasn't gotten over his ex-boyfriend Gordon, by the way) being threatened by a vampire. Also, Mrs. Lovett diagnoses Anthony with terminal eyebrow cancer. ):

I THOUGHT YOU WERE JOKING. O_O

(Unfortunately, I saw a twitchy eyebrow, but not eyebrow cancer. Did you see the part with the jetpacks?)

carey_pontmercy April 14 2010, 19:25:04 UTC

Well, Mrs. Lovett didn't say anything about cancer, but I saw "malignant tumor" and assumed cancer, which, in retrospect, was silly. I think that this fic is affecting my cognitive abilities.

Yes, I did see the jetpacks! Truly, it saddens me that I was unable to include that part.

hylian_lor April 14 2010, 13:22:08 UTC

E-eybrow cancer?

-giggles-

sarcasmspirit April 14 2010, 15:03:51 UTC

"her skin is now patchy where it was burnt"

Yeah. Being pushed into an oven only subjects some parts of your body to burning. Unless by pushing INTO the oven the author means she was pushed against it, in which case Toby needs some lessons in effective murder techniques.

I also love "I just told her not to chase wildlife around in public places." As if it's a reminder of a childhood etiquette lesson.

jibacoil April 15 2010, 15:54:14 UTC

"It's shaped like a naked lady stabbing a tiger to death while also giving a man a handjob. They're both smoking and the tiger is saying, "Motherfucker!" Talented boy, that Toby. "Not-so-bright", my ass."

BRB LOLLING FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER

dioschorium April 16 2010, 02:31:59 UTC

Alternatively, Anthony's supplementing his income with smuggling, piracy, and/or a secret career as Antonia Beaumont, famed courtesan. What a shame. He was such a nice boy.

Isn't there an Oscar Wilde story with a similar plot?

Also, A+ for the tattoo comment.