Now - Chapter 4 - "Nightmares"
parings: Jaemin/Minjae
rated: n-17 (smut, violence, gore, murder)
genre: angst, drama, au
length: complete
disclaimer: english isn't my native language
Changmin was a hired assassin, a cold and empty man, prepared to die any day without having never believed in love. One night, he felt his heart beat fast when he saw the pale skin and dark eyes that seemed to be a demon of sex, a succubus - the young and beautiful stripper Youngwoong. Without realizing, he was attracted by a network of lies, hatred and revenge, unable to resist his treacherous heart that fell in love with someone who wasn't who he seemed to be.
*sorry, not reviewed*[Changmin's POV]
I couldn't breathe, feeling some weight on my chest and someone squeezing my neck. I opened my eyes, but I couldn't understand what was happening. I used all my strength to try those hands away from my neck, but it was harder than it seemed.
The person who was suffocating me was sitting on my chest and wept, his hot tears fell over my face.
"Jae ... Jaejoong .... "I muttered as I tried to breathe, my chest hurt I felt as if my lungs burned. "Stop it ... you g-going to kill me ... "
But he kept choking me, as he sobbed louder.
"You'll never put your dirty hands on me again. You have no idea how many times I dreamed about killing you. I'll send you to hell, you bastard. "
"Jae ... I-It's me .... "
He couldn't hear me, he was having a nightmare. I gathered all my strength again and I could push him, he fell to the ground.
I felt around my neck as if he could not believe I was free to breathe again.
Then I looked at the floor of the room.
Jaejoong's face was wet with tears and his expression was confused and lost.
"Jae .. Jaejoong, are you okay? "
He almost killed me and I'm wondering if he's okay?
He looked at me as if he had never seen me before and asked "Who are you?"
"Jaejoong, I-" I sat on the bed and he realized I was naked.
He got up quickly and began shouting "Who are you? Don't touch me!! I'll kill you! "
He was serious about not being safe to approach him.
Then he ran to the lamp and lifted the object as if it were going to throwing it on me, but I ran up to him and held his face with my fingers.
"Jaejoong! Jaejoong! IT'S OKAY! I am here and no one will hurt you I promise! "
Weeping, he left the lamp crashing to the ground and held my hands were on his face.
"Changmin, Changmin, I'm sorry, I was having a nightmare. It was so real ... "
"Shhh" I touched his wet face leaned in my chest and stroked his head as he sobbed violently muttering "I'm sorry, Changmin, I'm sorry."
-
I helped him take a shower, I was afraid that something bad happened to him, and he got mad when I didn't allow him to take valium.
Soothing and baths don't match.
He sat on the bed when I was drying his hair with a towel, he had stopped crying but his dark eyes looked empty and I was a little scared.
What happened to you, my kitten?
"Please stay here while I make tea for you." I muttered, kissed his forehead and went to the kitchen.
When I went into the room I heard him muttering something, I think he was on the phone. I wanted to hear, but if he noticed I was going to lose his confidence.
When I was in the kitchen I heard him open the door of the living room.
"Jaejoong!"
He was gone. I grabbed my wallet on top of a table in the room, but totally forgot to wear shoes.
I got to the sidewalk just before he come around the corner. So I ran as fast as I could, my feet hurt, but I almost without pain.
When I managed to hold his wrist, he turned to me and pushed me.
The wind was very strong, but it was no longer raining.
It was four o'clock in the morning.
"Jaejoong! It's late, let's go home. "
He laughed sarcastically. "Let's go home? You mean YOUR home! I HAVE NO HOME!"
"Whatever! Just come back! "
The wind was strong enough to make me shout to be heard .
" Let me go ! "
" No, I can't ! "
" Why not? "
Why not? Good question . Why shouldn't I let him go and disappear as if it had not existed? I barely know him, I just fucked him, it wans't like i was in love or something.
I thought again that every time I see him he looks younger. His hair was so messy, I just wanted to stick my hands in them. In light of the streetlamps, his skin glowed, paler than ever. My kitten seems fragile as a stray cat.
I'm getting worried, my heart is tight.
"You said I ... you said I was just a whore! "
Yes. I said it.
But this wasn't the only reason to make him flee. Knowing him the little I knew, I was sure he stab me the next time I call him whore again. He wasn't running because I called him a whore.
It was the nightmare, right?
He tried to kill me because he thought I was someone else. Someone that I want to kill. For real.
"I was just teasing you, you idiot!" I took a step forward, tried to hold his hand, but he stepped back and laughed sarcastically. I hate it when he laughs like that.
"No, no, you were right! I'm just a bitch! A cheap whore! So I think you owe me for the amazing sex that night. "
Why it hurts to hear it? I was calling him whore few hours before, right?
I don't recognize myself anymore.
"Shut up!" I was one step away from giving him a punch. No.. I don't want to hurt him for real.
"Why are you so mad now, stud? Do you wanna hit me? Go ahead. But you can't break what's already broken."
Some of his tears splashed on my face, brought by the strong wind.
"Gimme money, honey. The work was well done, I'm proud of myself. "
So that's it?
"That's the only thing you want from me?' I bit my lower lip so hard, then I feel the taste of blood.
What are you doing to me, kitten?
He chuckled. "What you thought it was, Changmin-ah? What a whore like me could want? Charming Prince?"
The words I had said to him in the cafeteria turned against me.
That looks amazing, I am no longer the same as I used to be.
"Stop it, Jae, let's go home."
"Let me go."
"Jaejoong ... are you crying. "
"Do you mind?"
"I don't know why, but I care, dammit!"
He approached and the wind dropped a bit.
"Do you mind? Really?"
He kissed me, it tasted my blood, but we didn't care.
His sweet smile was only pretending. "Well, that's cute." He squeezed my cheeks. "But I don't care about you. We fucked, boy, it's not like we get married or something."
Now I know why he hates being called a whore.
I grabbed his arm and he hissed in pain. Oh, sure, I burned his arm with hot coffee last week.
"Tell me his name!" I yelled.
"What?"
"The guy who did this."
"You're talking about the stupid guy who burned my arm with hot coffee? I'm looking at him."
"That was an accident! I'm referring to the guy who turned you that you are today. "
"This piece of shit I am."
"That little shit you are."
He wiped his face with the back of his hand.
"Tell me his name and I'll kill him. I bring you his head if you feel better."
Nothing would give me greater satisfaction than to kill the bastard who hurt him.
He seemed to think a bit about it and I thought he would tell me his name, but all he did was reach out and say "You brought your wallet?"
I handed him my wallet.
He touched the corner of my mouth and looked at the tip of his finger. Blood.
"Please don't hurt yourself, kid. You're so cute. You don't know it, but you are."
When he stepped back a few steps, walking backwards, I had no power to stop him.
A car stopped in the street, he opened the door and entered,
So that was the person with whom he spoke on the phone.
"Take care!" He shouted before the car accelerate and lead him away.
No wonder why I would do, I started running after him, but in vain.
"I don't want to take care of myself, stupid kitten. I want to take care of you. "I whispered to him that he couldn't hear me.
It started raining.