Wedding Regrets?

[babyflite]

Last week after dieseldawn wedding, I received a phone call from her telling me about how she felt with regards to her Singapore wedding. I shall not go into details but the gist of it is that the typical Asian wedding is all about the parents and making them happy. She then asked if I regretted having my wedding in Singapore. To be honest, it's something

Comments

[dieseldawn]

that's awesome! I was telling someone else on my blog that the reason i felt that the SGP wedding had no meaning (hence was boring/iritating etc) was because nothing of the traditional SGP wedding has any meaning for me. The tea ceremony is something which i did for the parents, but kneeling down to relatives is meaningless to me and quite pagan which contrasts with my beliefs. The church ceremony would be meaningful to me, but i didn't have one, as it was done already in ireland. And the dinner... well you know what i felt about that

[dieseldawn]

oh yah.. and don't forget i had 200 more strangers than you at my wedding, so any frustrations about these strangers taking up my precious time with my close friends is doubled!

i can't believe that in the past, the bigger the wedding the more fortunate and happy the couple were. society has really changed. now small and simple is beautiful!

[babyflite]

You are right, I did have more time to mingle with my guests at the dinner coz I only had 200 guests. I do hate how most people just tune out during the speeches though. At my wedding the best man speech went for quite a while and I think a lot of people just weren't paying attention. Guess there's nothing you can do about it since most probably don't know the couple well enough to care.

It's true that the people who have the most fun at Singapore weddings are the guests! Or at least guests who are close to the bride and groom and know lots of other people at the wedding. Oh well, while I don't regret our wedding I would probably opt for a smaller destination wedding if I could do it all over again. At a beach resort in Thailand/Bali/Maldives with just a small handful of guests. Then again I probably wouldn't have coz it would have been even more of a hassle to plan. :p

[dieseldawn]

hmmm yeah.. if i was only allowed one wedding i would also go for the destiniation wedding... in ireland! and force you to come! :P

[msbrightside]

Just surfed through some of your wedding posts, and it really does look like you had a lot of fun :)

I think I'm pretty lucky to have got away with a decent approximation of the wedding I wanted! I do however regret (with the benefit of hindsight) not hiring a wedding planner. About six weeks from the wedding I had that moment of absolute clarity: "Why the feck did we NOT outsource some of this crap?!"

[babyflite]

Well I think the problem for us was that we didn't have any idea on what kind of wedding we wanted! We just wanted to get married and get on with the honeymoon. So in that sense I guess we were pretty happy with our wedding. But yeah hiring a wedding planner was the best money we spent. It just made everything so much easier and everything on the wedding day ran really smoothly. Or at least we never knew if anything did go wrong coz she took care of everything!

[joannako]

i hope you dont mind me butting in.. but with a few more weeks to go to my wedding, i am beginning to think i should have gotten a wedding planner too! i guess, its something almost every other bride goes through!

[msbrightside]

Not at all! Well if it's not too late, by all means outsource. I really wish I had!

[am_klutz]

I love this post! I totally agree! Most people think that the wedding is the highlight of everything but to me, the wedding is mainly for the parents especially here.. it's the start of a new journey for the couple and I guess having a dinner is to share the joy with friends. And it doesn't have to be perfect and the best! Small is good! It's tough for the couple when you have 300-500 people and probably don't know most well. And you just spend the night smiling politely at strangers. V's destination wedding in Puerto Vallarta was so much fun because it was small and everyone had good fun with the games and all.

[babyflite]

Yeah small is definitely better. If we had a wedding in Sydney it would have been small. Maybe just 50-60 people. But my parents would have wanted a wedding dinner in Singapore anyway and I didn't want to have to plan 2 weddings.

[balletpumps]

We had a small wedding of less than 20 pax in Melbourne and it was really nice to see everyone whom we loved and wanted to have around everywhere. It was a dress off the rack and we had a small budget but heck we had a lovely time. =)

We didn't end up having the dinner in SG and till this day... 2.5 kids later, my mum is still holding it against me that we didn't go down that route. She loves to casually remind me that I am missing out on the biggest event of my life. =p (AND that I should consider staging ANOTHER wedding here, even though I've been wedded for like 4 years now.)

[babyflite]

I really don't think the size and budget of the wedding matters, just as long as you and your guests had a good time. Your wedding sounds lovely. If we had our wedding in Sydney I would have liked it to be small, intimate and held at this restaurant on the cliff by the sea coz that was where Merrill took me after he proposed. :)

[vixette7]

i had fun at your dinner, even tho i didn't know anyone else there.

i'm just so glad i've managed to get away without a wedding dinner....yet.
the benefits of being half a world away. :D

[babyflite]

I'm glad you enjoyed yourself. :)

And surely since it's been a while your parents wouldn't make you guys have a dinner in Singapore down the track?

[vixette7]

doubt it, not with finances and jobhunting going the way it is now.

anyway we've already told them if and when we have a dinner, it's gonna be old skool teochew restaurant with surly aunty waitresses and pvc covered chairs but damn good food. that or no signboard. heh. lets see if i can actually pull it off.

[dieseldawn]

you didn't know anyone there? I was there... erica - was she sitting in our table? Were you the girl whom i was sitting next to??