[fic] REPLACEMENT
Title: Replacement - Chapter 7
Authors: ayakanishi
Pairing: ChinenXOC, YamadaXOC(Hideki Aya)
Rating: PG-13
Genre: love, romance, failed angst
Disclaimer: i only own the plot
Author’s Notes: this fic has two parts... the past and the present... the past will be Aya's POV and will be on blue font, and present will be Chinen's POV which will be on my default font... hmmm what else... and as usual, all italics will be their thoughts. Sometimes there will also be narrator's POV...^_^V
Warning: dead!yamada
Summary: The person you love the most died in front of you, will you be able to forgive yourself for not being able to save him? Will you be able to let of the past even if someone came to help you move on?
---Chinen's POV---
Yamada-kun, what exactly do you want me to do? Why did you choose me to do this? It's gonna be hard and telling me that I love her is just... confusing me. I don't know if she'll love me back, she loves you so much.
After dreaming about that, I couldn't sleep for the next few nights. I just kept on thinking about what he said. I don't really want to sleep as well, I don't want to see him, for now. I'm really confused about what he said. I looked at my clock, 2am, but still... I couldn't even feel sleepy.
Knock knock. Huh? Who could be knocking at my room this time? I stood up and opened the door. i saw Aya's worried figure outside.
"I'm right, you're still awake," she said.
"H-how did you know?"
"I'm insomniac as well, so I know. Beside your light is on, and whenever I pass by here it's off, if ever your sleeping. Can I?"
"Yeah, sure," I let her in and closed the door, "is there something you need? Just tell me,"
She sat on the foot end of my bed as I sat on the opposite side, "I just wanna know if something's bothering you,"
Is she worried about me? I.. I feel so happy, "Uhmm... nothing,"
"Nothing? You're not sleeping for about four days now Chinen," then she looked down to the bed, and then, she looked at me with a very worried pair of eyes, "I'm worried,"
I chuckled, "Hey, don't ok? I'm fine,"
She moved a bit closer to me, "Chinen, please, tell me,"
"I... I'm just thinking of something... something that only I can do, to make you... smile,"
"Is me not smiling really that bothering?"
"To be honest it is... Aya, I want you to feel that you're alive again, I want you to realize how does it feels to be happy," I held her on her shoulders.
"I'm hopeless Chinen... I can't find my happiness here," she looked down.
"Then I won't lose hope! If you think, there's no reason to smile, then I'll find you one!"
I heard her sob, "Why are you so concerned about me?"
Cause... I love you... "It's because, I really care so much about you, you're a precious FRIEND to me," that word friend stabbed me.
Then she suddenly embraced me, "I'm sorry... I'll try, but I can't promise,"
I wrapped my arms around her slim waist, I loved the feeling. I really love it that she's so close to me like this, make this stay like forever please... but there's just one change, I want her happy, "It's ok... say, I know you hate me because I'm so stubborn about this. Once I make you smile, I promise you, I'll leave this house right away,"
She pulled herself and looked at me as if she's gonna kiss me. I don't know how to read her expression, it's... complicated, I don't know if she liked my offer or not. She looked down and said, "I hate you... you told me you will never leave me,"
"I..."
"Don't leave... if you leave... no one will find me a reason to smile. If you leave, I might not smile ever again,"
I smiled at her, "Ok then, I won't leave hmm... I need a reward once I make you smile, go on a date with me, how's that?"
She nodded and embraced me again. That was easy. The next day, I was able to sleep, with her by my side. She let me sleep on her lap. She sang that song to me so I can fall asleep, the Dearest. Good thing it's Saturday, I don't really feel like getting up. Especially that I'm like this. I looked up at her, she's already awake or she's still awake? I smiled at her, "Ohayou,"
She's petting my head as if I'm her pet, "Ohayou, Chinen,"
And I noticed, her other hand is holding my hand, "Chinen?"
"Nn?" I closed my eyes. I want to feel this moment.
"I want to go somewhere, wanna come?"
"Of course, I'll go wherever you are,"
After we eat out breakfast we went out.
---Aya's POV, present---
We were walking. I decided to bring him to the bay where I used to stay. Ryosuke also liked it there. I slept calmly last night though I was sitting. But with Chinen, I really feel calm. Calm like whenever I'm at the post or by Ryosuke's grave. Ryosuke, why do I feel like this? I feel so comfortable towards Chinen. He's different from the others. He didn't give up on me and I can't see any hint of him giving up.
I held his hand. It's really soft, like Ryosuke's. I also feel calm whenever I hold Chinen's. Ryosuke, maybe, it's time for me to smile right? Maybe I should try my best to smile for him. I want him to be always with me.
"Chinen? If I say that you stay with me forever, will you stay?" I stupidly asked. What am I asking? Of course he won't I'm not his wife to begin with.
"Of course I will," huh? He will? But why? "I will not break my promise to you,"
Finally we reached the bay where me and Ryosuke used to hang out. We are just by the wall. I decided not to sit on top of it. Chinen and I were just watching the waves of the water. I stared at his face. He seemed to notice it and maybe he's uncomfortable. But I couldn't help it, his face is like an angel. Maybe, Ryosuke sent him to me as my angel.
"Chinen, you told me if I smile, we'll go on a date right?" yes, I will smile on you now. I will...
"Of course we will,"
I was just about to raise my lips. I will smile but suddenly. He collapsed, I saw blood, lots of blood. He was on the floor. He's in so much pain. What happened?! I looked around and I saw him! The guy who killed Ryosuke! Sugiyama! What's he doing here?! I thought he's in a rehab! And now what he's trying to do?! Does he wants to kill Chinen by stabbing him!? No, please don't! I don't have any time of going after him, I have to save Chinen.... I have to, I don't want to be like before. I wasn't able to save Ryosuke.
I knelt down to Chinen, just let the other people chase Sugiyama, "Ch-chinen..." I held him by my arms not worried even if my clothes will be stained with blood, "don't leave ok?"
"I... won't don't worry..."
"Ch-chii... I'll smile... just please don't go, we'll still have a date right?" then, I smiled though tears were running down my eyes. I saw him smile as well.
He reached for my face, "Aya... I'm happy, that... I made you smile," he's slowly closing his eyes.
"Ch-chii? Chii... wake up, open your eyes!"
---Chinen's POV---
I'm really happy. I made her smile, finally. Though at the same time she's crying as well. I can hear her, she's calling my name. Telling me to wake up. I'm trying to keep myself up, but I feel so sleepy. I wanna rest for a while. Then, everything's black.
Authors: ayakanishi
Pairing: ChinenXOC, YamadaXOC(Hideki Aya)
Rating: PG-13
Genre: love, romance, failed angst
Disclaimer: i only own the plot
Author’s Notes: this fic has two parts... the past and the present... the past will be Aya's POV and will be on blue font, and present will be Chinen's POV which will be on my default font... hmmm what else... and as usual, all italics will be their thoughts. Sometimes there will also be narrator's POV...^_^V
Warning: dead!yamada
Summary: The person you love the most died in front of you, will you be able to forgive yourself for not being able to save him? Will you be able to let of the past even if someone came to help you move on?
---Chinen's POV---
Yamada-kun, what exactly do you want me to do? Why did you choose me to do this? It's gonna be hard and telling me that I love her is just... confusing me. I don't know if she'll love me back, she loves you so much.
After dreaming about that, I couldn't sleep for the next few nights. I just kept on thinking about what he said. I don't really want to sleep as well, I don't want to see him, for now. I'm really confused about what he said. I looked at my clock, 2am, but still... I couldn't even feel sleepy.
Knock knock. Huh? Who could be knocking at my room this time? I stood up and opened the door. i saw Aya's worried figure outside.
"I'm right, you're still awake," she said.
"H-how did you know?"
"I'm insomniac as well, so I know. Beside your light is on, and whenever I pass by here it's off, if ever your sleeping. Can I?"
"Yeah, sure," I let her in and closed the door, "is there something you need? Just tell me,"
She sat on the foot end of my bed as I sat on the opposite side, "I just wanna know if something's bothering you,"
Is she worried about me? I.. I feel so happy, "Uhmm... nothing,"
"Nothing? You're not sleeping for about four days now Chinen," then she looked down to the bed, and then, she looked at me with a very worried pair of eyes, "I'm worried,"
I chuckled, "Hey, don't ok? I'm fine,"
She moved a bit closer to me, "Chinen, please, tell me,"
"I... I'm just thinking of something... something that only I can do, to make you... smile,"
"Is me not smiling really that bothering?"
"To be honest it is... Aya, I want you to feel that you're alive again, I want you to realize how does it feels to be happy," I held her on her shoulders.
"I'm hopeless Chinen... I can't find my happiness here," she looked down.
"Then I won't lose hope! If you think, there's no reason to smile, then I'll find you one!"
I heard her sob, "Why are you so concerned about me?"
Cause... I love you... "It's because, I really care so much about you, you're a precious FRIEND to me," that word friend stabbed me.
Then she suddenly embraced me, "I'm sorry... I'll try, but I can't promise,"
I wrapped my arms around her slim waist, I loved the feeling. I really love it that she's so close to me like this, make this stay like forever please... but there's just one change, I want her happy, "It's ok... say, I know you hate me because I'm so stubborn about this. Once I make you smile, I promise you, I'll leave this house right away,"
She pulled herself and looked at me as if she's gonna kiss me. I don't know how to read her expression, it's... complicated, I don't know if she liked my offer or not. She looked down and said, "I hate you... you told me you will never leave me,"
"I..."
"Don't leave... if you leave... no one will find me a reason to smile. If you leave, I might not smile ever again,"
I smiled at her, "Ok then, I won't leave hmm... I need a reward once I make you smile, go on a date with me, how's that?"
She nodded and embraced me again. That was easy. The next day, I was able to sleep, with her by my side. She let me sleep on her lap. She sang that song to me so I can fall asleep, the Dearest. Good thing it's Saturday, I don't really feel like getting up. Especially that I'm like this. I looked up at her, she's already awake or she's still awake? I smiled at her, "Ohayou,"
She's petting my head as if I'm her pet, "Ohayou, Chinen,"
And I noticed, her other hand is holding my hand, "Chinen?"
"Nn?" I closed my eyes. I want to feel this moment.
"I want to go somewhere, wanna come?"
"Of course, I'll go wherever you are,"
After we eat out breakfast we went out.
---Aya's POV, present---
We were walking. I decided to bring him to the bay where I used to stay. Ryosuke also liked it there. I slept calmly last night though I was sitting. But with Chinen, I really feel calm. Calm like whenever I'm at the post or by Ryosuke's grave. Ryosuke, why do I feel like this? I feel so comfortable towards Chinen. He's different from the others. He didn't give up on me and I can't see any hint of him giving up.
I held his hand. It's really soft, like Ryosuke's. I also feel calm whenever I hold Chinen's. Ryosuke, maybe, it's time for me to smile right? Maybe I should try my best to smile for him. I want him to be always with me.
"Chinen? If I say that you stay with me forever, will you stay?" I stupidly asked. What am I asking? Of course he won't I'm not his wife to begin with.
"Of course I will," huh? He will? But why? "I will not break my promise to you,"
Finally we reached the bay where me and Ryosuke used to hang out. We are just by the wall. I decided not to sit on top of it. Chinen and I were just watching the waves of the water. I stared at his face. He seemed to notice it and maybe he's uncomfortable. But I couldn't help it, his face is like an angel. Maybe, Ryosuke sent him to me as my angel.
"Chinen, you told me if I smile, we'll go on a date right?" yes, I will smile on you now. I will...
"Of course we will,"
I was just about to raise my lips. I will smile but suddenly. He collapsed, I saw blood, lots of blood. He was on the floor. He's in so much pain. What happened?! I looked around and I saw him! The guy who killed Ryosuke! Sugiyama! What's he doing here?! I thought he's in a rehab! And now what he's trying to do?! Does he wants to kill Chinen by stabbing him!? No, please don't! I don't have any time of going after him, I have to save Chinen.... I have to, I don't want to be like before. I wasn't able to save Ryosuke.
I knelt down to Chinen, just let the other people chase Sugiyama, "Ch-chinen..." I held him by my arms not worried even if my clothes will be stained with blood, "don't leave ok?"
"I... won't don't worry..."
"Ch-chii... I'll smile... just please don't go, we'll still have a date right?" then, I smiled though tears were running down my eyes. I saw him smile as well.
He reached for my face, "Aya... I'm happy, that... I made you smile," he's slowly closing his eyes.
"Ch-chii? Chii... wake up, open your eyes!"
---Chinen's POV---
I'm really happy. I made her smile, finally. Though at the same time she's crying as well. I can hear her, she's calling my name. Telling me to wake up. I'm trying to keep myself up, but I feel so sleepy. I wanna rest for a while. Then, everything's black.