089. "I like your face."; Kangin/Ryeowook
A/N: Wow, I'm late, yippee!! -_- anyway, welcome home, Youngwoon-ah!
Word count: 1,242
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When Youngwoon cries into Jungsu's arms the night he returns to the dorm, Ryeowook suddenly remembers almost every word Youngwoon said to him before he went to the army.
He remembers Youngwoon said "thanks for all the delicious meal you cooked for me, Wookie-ah. You have always been a great dongsaeng, better than my other dongsaeng," and for that he wish he had cried all night long. He thought of it for the first time of how he had lost another hyung to taste his cookings. He didn't even feel that way when Heechul was clinging to Hangeng the night he helped him to fold all his clothes into the pink luggage he had been using since his trainee days.
When Youngwoon screams at how good his cooking has gotten and keeps asking for more while talking about his rough days in the army with the other members that got together today (not Kibum, he is not here like how he always did in the last rocky years) Ryeowook smiles and remembers a week before Youngwoon decided to publicised his decision to enroll for the army, when he sat down next to him without saying anything, and nudged his head into Ryeowook's chest, silently asking to be comforted. Youngwoon had eventually created a new habit of crying into his chest every time he felt like the world is going against him.
Ryeowook knows how Youngwoon would never go to Jungsu at that time, no matter how bad he felt like doing it. Jungsu was having too much to handle on his own. Ryeowook would hold Youngwoon's shoulders and rubbed them softly, as if his hyung was a fragile sculptured human that needed careful attention and he was the only one inside this group that could express such detailed features.
"Be strong hyung, I'm always here for you," he had said, even though he knew it was cliche to be said. Youngwoon would smile and hugged him tight, saying "this is why I love you," and "you're so kind, Wookie-ah," and Ryeowook would breathed deeply so that his own tears would not fall.
When everyone is drunken later that night, Jungsu kisses Youngwoon's cheek and tells him how he missed him the days he wasn't here, and how he was so tired to move on if it was not for the letters he got from Youngwoon to stay strong. Ryeowook, being a heavy drinker isn't really affected by the alcohol and waits for Youngwoon to respond to the kiss with something better than Jungsu's sloppy one. But before Youngwoon can even pull him close, Jungsu falls into his lap and snores. They laugh and stop a few minutes later when they realise that they are the only ones who are still awake.
Ryeowook suddenly remembers about the last words Youngwoon said to him before he gotten into the truck that will take him to the camp. His face is suddenly blushing.
"You've gotten chubbier, hyung," he says to cover up his red cheeks. Youngwoon laughs and pinches his own belly. "Because I missed your cookings, Wookie-ah. I had to eat anything that could fill me so I won't miss you."
"What a good way to tell me to never stop cooking for you, hyung," he says, laughing while getting up and away from the living room to his bedroom. Yet as he passses Youngwoon and the sleeping Jungsu, Youngwoon pulls his hand and grabs his slim waist.
"Seriously hyung, you drank too much!" he says pushing the big guy away and tries to escape, but Youngwoon grips are too strong he can't get away. Youngwoon pins him on the floor and stares at his red face.
"Seriously Kim Ryeowook, you are blessed with a wonderful heart behind such a wonderful face," he says, laughing so hard his body moves along with each hiccup and halt. Ryeowook sits up and giggles along.
"Thank you, Ryeowook-ah."
"For what, hyung?" he feels like he knows the answer, but he prefers to pretend like he don't. It isn't a big matter, he supposes.
Youngwoon smiles, and pats his head.
"For everything."
Ryeowook remembers the moment before Youngwoon left with the big and noisy army truck that reeked of diesel. Jungsu was waving but not really watching; his eyes were full of tears Ryeowook couldn't really see his eyes at all. Kyuhyun and Sungmin were staring at the dirt on their shoes and Ryeowook was somehow began to understand how these two members are always lost in thoughts. The other members were smiling their sad smiles, like sending Youngwoon was their own choice when it was Youngwoon who couldn't sleep thinking of what would happen to them after his absence by his bed. Nothing was wrong with that, Ryeowook thinks. They're expressing their feelings, after all it was their loss too, losing a big brother like Youngwoon.
Ryeowook didn't cry. He had always been the hardest one to shed his tears for someone. He didn't think it will be necessary because Youngwoon wasn't dying.Youngwoon would only be gone for three years. So why did they looked as if he wouldn't return?
Gosh, they really need to put some more trust in him. Like how he always had been doing.
"Ryeowook-ah," Youngwoon called him to come nearer to the truck, and Ryeowook did as he was told with fingers pinching his nose shut. He really didn't like the smell of old trucks and mud, let alone diesel.
"Yes, hyung?" he asked, and Youngwoon grabbed his hands. Ryeowook jolted but he didn't pull away. Instead he waited for Youngwoon to finish his words.
"If... If I kiss you right now, would you despise me?" he could somehow see this to come, so Ryeowook laughed and shook his head.
"Why should I, hyung? I could never hate you," he said, and Youngwoon's grips gotten tighter. Ryeowook waited again. For some reasons, he didn't feel like yanking his hands away. Youngwoon looked around for a few seconds, scanning and making sure no one was around and slowly leant in before he put his lips onto Ryeowook's stiffened ones. It could hardly be a kiss, and Ryeowook almost laugh because Youngwoon who is so manly couldn't even kiss him directly even when nobody's watching them.
"What was that?" he asked, face blushing as he tried hard to hold in his giggles. Youngwoon bit his lower lip, and let go of his hands.
"Then wait for three years. Three years, and I'll kiss you the way I really wanted to. Will you?" Youngwoon asked, and Ryeowook nodded.
But when three years passed, Youngwoon is back and Ryeowook is positive army life had been so hard on him he can't (won't) remember any promise he made beforehand. So he wants to let it go (though his heart feels burned and torn to pieces) and ignores everything that happened once he walk out to his bedroom.
(Ryeowook is afraid it was only in his dreams and no no he doesn't like to be ashamed of something that comes from a fantasy)
"Good night, hyung. I have a schedule early in the morning, so I'll see you around," he says (but he feels like stopping when he's in front of Youngwoon and fall free into his arms) and goes straight to bed.
(he misses the way Youngwoon's hands twitch and his lips tremble as their skins scratch against each other when he pulls his hands away)
-End-
Word count: 1,242
-
When Youngwoon cries into Jungsu's arms the night he returns to the dorm, Ryeowook suddenly remembers almost every word Youngwoon said to him before he went to the army.
He remembers Youngwoon said "thanks for all the delicious meal you cooked for me, Wookie-ah. You have always been a great dongsaeng, better than my other dongsaeng," and for that he wish he had cried all night long. He thought of it for the first time of how he had lost another hyung to taste his cookings. He didn't even feel that way when Heechul was clinging to Hangeng the night he helped him to fold all his clothes into the pink luggage he had been using since his trainee days.
When Youngwoon screams at how good his cooking has gotten and keeps asking for more while talking about his rough days in the army with the other members that got together today (not Kibum, he is not here like how he always did in the last rocky years) Ryeowook smiles and remembers a week before Youngwoon decided to publicised his decision to enroll for the army, when he sat down next to him without saying anything, and nudged his head into Ryeowook's chest, silently asking to be comforted. Youngwoon had eventually created a new habit of crying into his chest every time he felt like the world is going against him.
Ryeowook knows how Youngwoon would never go to Jungsu at that time, no matter how bad he felt like doing it. Jungsu was having too much to handle on his own. Ryeowook would hold Youngwoon's shoulders and rubbed them softly, as if his hyung was a fragile sculptured human that needed careful attention and he was the only one inside this group that could express such detailed features.
"Be strong hyung, I'm always here for you," he had said, even though he knew it was cliche to be said. Youngwoon would smile and hugged him tight, saying "this is why I love you," and "you're so kind, Wookie-ah," and Ryeowook would breathed deeply so that his own tears would not fall.
When everyone is drunken later that night, Jungsu kisses Youngwoon's cheek and tells him how he missed him the days he wasn't here, and how he was so tired to move on if it was not for the letters he got from Youngwoon to stay strong. Ryeowook, being a heavy drinker isn't really affected by the alcohol and waits for Youngwoon to respond to the kiss with something better than Jungsu's sloppy one. But before Youngwoon can even pull him close, Jungsu falls into his lap and snores. They laugh and stop a few minutes later when they realise that they are the only ones who are still awake.
Ryeowook suddenly remembers about the last words Youngwoon said to him before he gotten into the truck that will take him to the camp. His face is suddenly blushing.
"You've gotten chubbier, hyung," he says to cover up his red cheeks. Youngwoon laughs and pinches his own belly. "Because I missed your cookings, Wookie-ah. I had to eat anything that could fill me so I won't miss you."
"What a good way to tell me to never stop cooking for you, hyung," he says, laughing while getting up and away from the living room to his bedroom. Yet as he passses Youngwoon and the sleeping Jungsu, Youngwoon pulls his hand and grabs his slim waist.
"Seriously hyung, you drank too much!" he says pushing the big guy away and tries to escape, but Youngwoon grips are too strong he can't get away. Youngwoon pins him on the floor and stares at his red face.
"Seriously Kim Ryeowook, you are blessed with a wonderful heart behind such a wonderful face," he says, laughing so hard his body moves along with each hiccup and halt. Ryeowook sits up and giggles along.
"Thank you, Ryeowook-ah."
"For what, hyung?" he feels like he knows the answer, but he prefers to pretend like he don't. It isn't a big matter, he supposes.
Youngwoon smiles, and pats his head.
"For everything."
Ryeowook remembers the moment before Youngwoon left with the big and noisy army truck that reeked of diesel. Jungsu was waving but not really watching; his eyes were full of tears Ryeowook couldn't really see his eyes at all. Kyuhyun and Sungmin were staring at the dirt on their shoes and Ryeowook was somehow began to understand how these two members are always lost in thoughts. The other members were smiling their sad smiles, like sending Youngwoon was their own choice when it was Youngwoon who couldn't sleep thinking of what would happen to them after his absence by his bed. Nothing was wrong with that, Ryeowook thinks. They're expressing their feelings, after all it was their loss too, losing a big brother like Youngwoon.
Ryeowook didn't cry. He had always been the hardest one to shed his tears for someone. He didn't think it will be necessary because Youngwoon wasn't dying.Youngwoon would only be gone for three years. So why did they looked as if he wouldn't return?
Gosh, they really need to put some more trust in him. Like how he always had been doing.
"Ryeowook-ah," Youngwoon called him to come nearer to the truck, and Ryeowook did as he was told with fingers pinching his nose shut. He really didn't like the smell of old trucks and mud, let alone diesel.
"Yes, hyung?" he asked, and Youngwoon grabbed his hands. Ryeowook jolted but he didn't pull away. Instead he waited for Youngwoon to finish his words.
"If... If I kiss you right now, would you despise me?" he could somehow see this to come, so Ryeowook laughed and shook his head.
"Why should I, hyung? I could never hate you," he said, and Youngwoon's grips gotten tighter. Ryeowook waited again. For some reasons, he didn't feel like yanking his hands away. Youngwoon looked around for a few seconds, scanning and making sure no one was around and slowly leant in before he put his lips onto Ryeowook's stiffened ones. It could hardly be a kiss, and Ryeowook almost laugh because Youngwoon who is so manly couldn't even kiss him directly even when nobody's watching them.
"What was that?" he asked, face blushing as he tried hard to hold in his giggles. Youngwoon bit his lower lip, and let go of his hands.
"Then wait for three years. Three years, and I'll kiss you the way I really wanted to. Will you?" Youngwoon asked, and Ryeowook nodded.
But when three years passed, Youngwoon is back and Ryeowook is positive army life had been so hard on him he can't (won't) remember any promise he made beforehand. So he wants to let it go (though his heart feels burned and torn to pieces) and ignores everything that happened once he walk out to his bedroom.
(Ryeowook is afraid it was only in his dreams and no no he doesn't like to be ashamed of something that comes from a fantasy)
"Good night, hyung. I have a schedule early in the morning, so I'll see you around," he says (but he feels like stopping when he's in front of Youngwoon and fall free into his arms) and goes straight to bed.
(he misses the way Youngwoon's hands twitch and his lips tremble as their skins scratch against each other when he pulls his hands away)
-End-