(Untitled)

[awewonder]

This has been bothering me a lot and I don’t intend it for anyone to read, but simply to rant.

Why is it that everyone is on my case about what I say? When I talk about someone, critically, jokingly, whatever, I seem harsh. That I hate the person. Or whatever else bullshit

Comments

[spunkysparkler]

I don't like opening up to people. I know how you feel. In the past when I do give out a little info about myself everyone will know by the end of the day about my personal life.
& like you just because I look so innocent+child-like when I say a curse word they're like O_O OMG. calm down.
I hate that.
Which is pretty much what led to my senior year of high school... I didn't hang out with really anyone. I was all loner(think Daria without a Jane). And I really didn't care :)

[awewonder]

I love Daria, and I'd totally be your Jane if I was in your high school =)

[spunkysparkler]

:)

+++

[musichick]

as much as you'd like not to open up, it's nice to see what's going on in your head.

finding that balance between being open and being private has got to be one of the most impossible things to do. how does one walk that fine line between open-ness/vulnerability and privacy (in some cases strength)/stand-offishness. okay, so i'm not the most articulate at the moment, but you get what i mean. and you know that i don't say this condescendingly, but empathetically, because you know what it's like with me.

not the most helpful of comments, but similar to your writing for the purpose of ranting, i'm commenting just to say that regarding your +++, i've been on the other end of a similar situation and just as many regrets have resulted as well. we try to walk this line together.

Re: +++

[awewonder]

I do know what you mean, but I'm speaking particularly to people I haven't known in a while... The ones that are quick to assume who I am and such, not the ones that have known me for years and years.

Just anyone who I'm not close with, really is who I'm speaking about. All my real friends, such as yourself, I have no problem in telling things to. But to others I'm just getting to know, or just now connecting with, it's harder.

Harder not because I don't trust them, but because I did trust them and with my vulnerability they assume certain things about me. It's so wretched, but I'm learning about myself now. And that's all good

Re: +++

[musichick]

got it. that's just as hard if not moreso. when there are ppl you've established as being comfortable with, it's almost like "well what's the point of letting new people in?" for potential problems such as this. unfortunately life doesn't work that way and people come into not only your life, but you and friends' lives, too quickly to really know about it.

hope you stop letting this person/these people and the situation get to you. if anything, it's a way to learn and be stronger against them.

[the_original_me]

I'm sorry. Opening up to people is really hard, and sometimes isn't worth it. People in general at this stage of the game really suck, and it's hard to find true friends who really respect you and look up to you.

But don't give up. They're out there.

XOXO