Fanfiction: Some Things Never Change
Characters: Yamashita Tomohisa, Takizawa Hideaki and Imai Tsubasa
Pairings: Read to know.
Genre: Angst
Rating: G
Summary: Despite the years, Yamapi's feelings remain unchanged. Now that he dares to reach out for what he wants, will it want him back?
Disclaimer: I know you know.
Some Things Never Change
He watched the back in front of him preparing nabe (Japanese steamboat). It'd been a long time since they ate together or spent any time together. But since he needed advice for his upcoming solo concert, Pi called on his trusty senior (senpai) and advisor, Takki.
It was a sight that brought back a flood of fond memories. At 13, he entered showbiz as a junior backup dancer. Being Takki’s junior (kouhai), he was tasked to watch that back and mirror his moves and steps. Takki wasn't just any senpai. He was highly regarded by not only the bigwigs at the agency but also by his seniors, peers and juniors alike. And it was this shiny senpai who singled him out of a crowd of almost a hundred young newbies to tease and dote on. He was Takki’s favourite. And that made Pi feel very special. There were many more talented and cuter bright-eyed, bushy tailed kouhais around, but Takki chose him. Till today, he still felt very special. Because he was Takki’s favourite.
Although Takki’s back seemed to have changed little, Pi’s had grown to be bigger and taller than the senpai he admired. In the world around them, much had changed too. They were no longer working closely and were spending precious little time together. But Pi realised that some things never change - his feelings. Around Takki, he always felt a pang of longing. Then and now, every time Takki was near, it would consume him.
Takki was still deciding on the stock base for the soup when Pi attacked him from behind.
Snuggling up to Takki, Pi plastered himself to that inviting back and rested his chin on those sloppy but sturdy shoulders.
'It’s payback time!’ Pi triumphantly declared. ‘You were always hugging and kissing me. Now it’s my turn!’
‘So now that you’re all grown up, you’re bullying your old man?’
‘A hug is hardly bullying. Besides, many girls would kill to be you right now,’ Pi laughingly bragged.
‘Nay, you won’t stand a chance if I’m around!’ Takki rebutted, ever confident of his goofy charm.
Since he too dearly missed the contact, he decided to indulge Pi a little longer.
But when the back hug persisted long enough for the kimchi soup base to escape the pot, Takki mockingly protested, ‘When’s this torture gonna end?’
‘Never!’
‘Never?’
‘I’ve been wanting to do this forever. So I’m never letting go,’ Pi retorted playfully.
Although it sounded casual, Pi was serious. There were so many things he couldn't do when he was a kouhai. He felt it was not his place to do anything to Takki. He couldn't ruffle his hair when he did something stupid, hug him anytime he liked, or tell him how he felt about him. He could only wait, wait for Takki to tousle his hair, bear hug him and tell him how adorable he looked.
But now it was different. He was bigger and bolder.
Closing his eyes, Pi tightened his wrap around his senpai's slim waist. With his cheek nuzzling Takki's soft brown mane, he breathed in deeply, hoping to infuse his senses with Takki's scent and touch. If only time would stop, then he could forever remain in this moment of perpetual bliss. But even if it were to last for only an instant, Pi wanted to burn this moment into his memory and remember it for life.
Takki turned around to face his beloved kouhai. Eyeing him with the gentlest of expressions, he realised that his baby-faced kouhai had lost none of his former charm. Everything he loved about him was still very evident in front of him - the affection and the stars in his eyes. Although he might be a tad more demanding now, he was still as irresistible as ever. And knowing full well that resistance was futile, Takki succumbed to once again suffocating Pi in a bone-crushing bear hug.
Pi might be much bigger and buffer now, but he still felt incredibly comfortable. Like always, he seemed to fit his arms to a tee.
‘What’s the brand of your shampoo?’ Takki suddenly asked.
‘Shiseido. Why do you ask?
Pi was flabbergasted by the question but Takki had a tendency to do that to him.
‘I used to know everything about you. But now... ,’ Takki replied with a hint of regret.
‘Actually, you need only know one thing.’
‘What’s that?’ Takki’s curiosity piqued.
‘That I’ll always love you.’
It would've been easy to dismiss that as a childish exchange of silly baby talk, if not for a slightly embarrassed but perfectly serious Pi.
Looking away, Takki pretended to be distracted. Then suddenly, he exaggeratedly exclaimed, ‘You know what? I think Tsubasa uses that brand too! But you smell different. So maybe it’s a different product. Are you endorsing it now? Bet you’re real hot with the sponsors!’
‘Ah… all this chatting is making me hungry. Let’s eat!’
With that, Takki hurriedly picked up a few items and left for the dining table. But Pi stayed motionless in the kitchen, except for the tears silently crawling down his doll-face.
No! He couldn't let Takki see him cry, not when he was already all grown up. Watching an adult cry was even more heartwrenching. And he knew it would break Takki’s heart. But who was gonna stop his heart from breaking?
Carelessly brushing aside his tears, Pi made his way as cheerfully as he could to the dinner table. Takki was piling mountains of food on his bowl and plate, looking every part the fretting parent concerned that his growing child was not eating enough. Looking at the scene before him, it felt so surreal, like a flashback to their past. While the fussing didn’t change, neither did the distance between them. Although Takki was just sitting right across the table in front of him, it still felt as if they were oceans apart. So near, yet so far. Some things really never change.
That night, Pi slept over. He had wrestled with the decision. But the only thing more painful than not having the love, was having nothing at all. So, he stayed.
Takki insisted that Pi took the whole bed while he slept on the futon. And like an obedient kouhai, he obliged. Although he had intended to stay quietly awake, Pi soon felt consciousness drift away. Maybe Takki’s company was too comforting. Or maybe his heart was just too tired.
Stubbornly keeping his back to Pi, Takki waited until he could hear muffled snoring before he relaxed. Getting up, he crept to the side of the bed. Blowing softly onto Pi’s face, Takki made sure that he was sound asleep.
Then, with a tinge of melancholy, Takki whispered the words Pi wanted to hear, ‘I love you too. Always.’
Comments make me
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Note: This fic is rather ambiguous. So readers will have to make their own assumptions. Do share them with me if you have any. Because I don't have the answers.
Also, I unfortunately don't actually know the brand of shampoo Pi or Tsu uses. But I'll ask them tonight. Let me know if you know.
And sorry for not delivering on my earlier titles. I was tied up with real life. If you haven't already made your choice for next Wed, would it be My Cruel Stepbrother or Blackmail, Cats and Pineapple?