Stillness and Constellations (Andromeda and Ted)
Title: Stillness and Constellations
Character(s): Andromeda Black, Ted Tonks, Nymphadora Tonks
Rating: PG
Word Count: 1,800 (approx.)
Summary: A war is never simple, and there are no undivided loyalties. Andromeda Black tries to deal with her family and the First War.
Author's Notes: Written for hp_summergen (originally posted here, cross-used for 7spells (Andromeda/Ted). Many thanks go to wanderlight and ressie_noldo for beta-reading and putting up with writerly tantrums. Written before the release of Deathly Hallows.
“What we call the beginning is often the end
And to make and end is to make a beginning.
The end is where we start from.”
- T.S Eliot, “Little Gidding”
i.
"I’m leaving this family - I will not be like the rest of you, mad and murderous, hands covered in blood. None of you give a damn about anyone else. I’m leaving, and I’m going to start a new life."
No-one heard her whisper "I’m sorry".
ii.
Up three flights of stairs, and there it was: a simple wooden door, the white paint peeling and more than a few scratches on it. Ted smiled, pulled out a Muggle key, and unlocked it. "It’s charmed against most opening spells," he said.
She stepped inside, and almost stumbled back out again. It was small and dingy, the lights barely penetrating the corners of the room. The couch was old and worn - possibly older than she was. The only new thing in the room was Ted’s - what was it? Telesight? Tele-eye? Television - that was it. No respectable Black would ever live in a place like this.
It was in a Muggle apartment building, in a Muggle part of town. This wasn’t Grimmauld Place, where hexes awaited any Muggle who tried to enter. This wasn’t home, not for a Black.
She wasn’t a Black anymore.
"What do you think?" Ted asked, obviously worried about her reaction.
"It’s perfect," she said. "It’s ours."
iii.
It was an odd sight: Dumbledore, the greatest wizard in the world, the only one that You-Know-Who feared, was perched on top of their stove. Both Andromeda and Ted understood why, of course. Their apartment didn’t have a fireplace, and Floo powder needed a consistent flame, so the stove it was. (Ted wondered what strings Dumbledore had to pull to get a stove added to the Floo network for the day.)
Ted caught Andromeda’s eye, and she smiled at him, patting her very pregnant stomach. He wasn’t sure how he’d gotten so lucky; marrying the only girl he’d ever loved. He’d soon be a father, too - a little witch, the Mediwizards said. He grinned.
His happiness faded with Dumbledore’s first words. "I’m sorry, Andromeda. Neither you nor Ted can be a part of the Order."
"Why?" she asked sharply. "Because I was born a Black? Because I’m a pureblood? Because he married me?"
"You’re targets," Dumbledore said simply. "Most of the Death Eaters would like to personally kill both of you. The Order can’t afford that."
"Who are you planning to recruit? The Death Eaters would like to kill all Mudbloods and blood traitors. The Death Eaters will only permit Death Eaters to live."
"You insulted the Black family when you left. Bellatrix is one of Voldemort’s" - Ted cringed at the name - "most trusted aides. Narcissa’s husband, Lucius Malfoy, is another. They all want you dead, and Ted with you. They can, and would, hunt you down and kill you. You cannot be on the front lines."
"Is the entire Order on the front lines?" Ted asked.
"Yes." Dumbledore frowned. "You have a family now. You’ll have a child soon. Do you want to risk all that to stop Voldemort?"
"Yes," Andromeda said, and then looked at Ted. "No. I’m not sure. We won’t let You Know Who take over without a fight."
"We cannot let you join the Order, but help you certainly can. If you both keep a low profile, you can gather information for us. It’s not as glorious as the Order, but it’s just as needed."
"I gave up glory when I left the Blacks." Dumbledore turned the stove on, and tossed a bit of Floo powder on it. Just as he began to disappear into the flames, Ted managed to quickly thank him.
iv.
Andromeda arrived at St. Mungo’s in the early afternoon, wearing her best cloak. It was getting a bit threadbare, since her mother had bought it for her coming of age party, some four years before. There wasn’t much money to spare in the Tonks household. Still, she looked professional - professional enough, she hoped, to be hired.
St. Mungo’s wasn’t where she would have chosen to work, but Dumbledore needed an informant inside. She had the required NEWTs to be a curse breaker, so at least she would be doing some good.
She walked up to the registration desk. "I have a job interview as a curse breaker."
"Right this way, please." The guide - a long-haired blonde that wouldn’t have looked out of place in the Muggle world - walked quickly down a corridor. "There it is."
"Thank you," she said, stepping inside the dim room. She could almost make out two people in the far corner of the room, one sitting at a desk and another leaning against it. "Andromeda Tonks, here for an interview," she said crisply.
"Ah. We’ve been expecting you. If you’ve made it this far, you have the required credentials, correct?"
"Yes, sir. Nine OWLs, and five NEWTs: History of Magic, Transfiguration, Charms, Defense Against the Dark Arts and Potions."
"Good. In these times of war, I’m afraid we must ask. Are you a Pureblood, half-blood, or Muggleborn?"
"Pureblood, sir."
"Name of your family and house at Hogwarts?" Andromeda cringed a bit.
"Black, and Slytherin."
The second man spoke for the first time. "Are you here to break curses or make sure they never get well?" he said nastily.
"I broke off with my family several years ago, sir. I don’t exist to them."
"Good cover story," the second man snarled. "You’re probably just a Death Eater trying to infiltrate St. Mungo’s."
"However," the first man said, "we do have a shortage of curse breakers. We’ll take you - but only on probation. If there is any sign of mistreatment, you will be sacked and tried for your crimes."
"You’re too soft, John," the second man said. "Barty Crouch has it right - they’re all sympathizers, active or not. You’ll regret this decision. She’ll be just like her family."
Andromeda left the room quickly, not looking back. Was there no one wouldn't, who didn’t judge on blood heritage?
v.
She came home late, so tired she was afraid to try Apparating into the apartment. She wanted to collapse into oblivion, but her husband and daughter were waiting for her. Slowly, painfully, she climbed the stairs up the apartment.
She unlocked the door, and stepped inside. Ted was sitting on the couch, a bottle of Firewhiskey at his side, watching Muggle sports. Nymphadora was leaning on him, fast asleep.
"Andi! I was beginning to wonder if you were ever coming home," Ted said.
"Hard day at work," she said dully.
"What’s wrong, love?" he said, putting aside the Firewhiskey, gently moving Nymphadora aside, and walked over to her.
"Ten cursed Muggleborns. Six of them died." She didn’t sound angry or even upset - just dulled and emotionless, as if she’d seen too much to bear.
"Andi, you saved four lives today. No one else could have."
"It should have been ten!" she yelled. "I lost six patients! Six of them! Any one of them could have been someone like you."
"Don’t yell, Andi. You’ll wake Nymphadora."
"Nymphadora needs to know what kind of world she lives in," she said coldly, every bit a Black. Ted looked away, trying not to notice how much she looked like her sisters in that moment. She was Andi now, not one of them. She was his now. Her family couldn’t change that.
"Andromeda, calm down. You saved lives today."
"I lost lives today," she said. "You could have been one of them."
"Andromeda, no. You know we’re some of the best-protected people in the wizarding world. We’re hidden, and we’re safe, Andi."
"And we let people die for us. Do you know what one of them said before he died? He named his killer."
"We’ll tell Dumbledore, and he will catch the killer. We may not be in the Order, but that doesn’t mean we’re helpless."
"I don’t think so," she said icily. "Bellatrix killed them. My sister killed six people, and tried to kill four more."
Ted was silent. He knew this wasn’t the first time Bellatrix had killed, nor would it be the last. She’d boasted in school that she’d killed before, when she warned him to stay away from Andi. He didn’t think she’d stopped since then.
"Say something, Ted," she whispered. "My sister. My family kills for fun. I’m one of them - I will always be one of them. And they would kill me if they had the chance."
"Oh, really?" he said, matching her earlier tone. "I’d thought that Nymphadora and I were your family. I thought you left them forever. It seems I was mistaken." He turned away, trying to keep his eyes from filling with tears.
"I hate them." She looked at Nymphadora, still asleep on the couch. "I ran from them, and still they follow me, everywhere I go. All I want is this - our family. Why can’t they leave me alone?" Her voice cracked. "How can we fight against them? They’re too strong."
"We’re still here, Andi. We’ll win this war yet." Ted put his arms around her, and held her as she cried.
vi.
"Have you heard? Have you heard? Have you heard?" The news was all over St. Mungo’s: Voldemort was gone, presumed dead. Andromeda couldn’t stop smiling. Two more had died in the last attack, but it was the very last attack. The war was over.
She called an early end to the day, and Apparated home. She didn’t stay, instead walking over to the Muggle "day care" center down the street to pick up Nymphadora. Nymphadora was, as always, delighted to see her, and babbled about her day’s exploits as they walked home, hand-in-hand.
"Daddy should be home soon," she said. "We have big news to talk to you about."
"Am I getting a new brother or sister? Kimmie’s getting one." Nymphadora smiled for a moment, and then cocked her head to the side. "I’m not sure I want a baby brother," she said, clinging to Andromeda.
"No, Nymphadora, I’m not pregnant. You know the war that Daddy and I have been worried about?" Nymphadora nodded, her face clouding. "Our side won. The bad guys are gone. We don’t have to worry as much, and you’ll be able to get a proper magic education soon."
Nymphadora grinned. "It’s like Doctor Who! The good guys always win, even when it’s scary!" she exclaimed. Andromeda had to stop herself from rolling her eyes. Nymphadora had been going on about the show for months, and her father shared her obsession. Some things, not even a war can change. Nymphadora paused for a moment, and said, "Really? You mean I can learn magic like you and Daddy?"
"Yes, love." There was a bang of displaced air from the bedroom, and Ted strode into the room. He swept up Nymphadora, holding her close. "You’ve heard, then," he said to Andromeda.
"It’s over. Thank Merlin, it’s over, and we made it through. We’re finally safe." She looked over at her husband and daughter, and smiled. “It’s just us now.”
Character(s): Andromeda Black, Ted Tonks, Nymphadora Tonks
Rating: PG
Word Count: 1,800 (approx.)
Summary: A war is never simple, and there are no undivided loyalties. Andromeda Black tries to deal with her family and the First War.
Author's Notes: Written for hp_summergen (originally posted here, cross-used for 7spells (Andromeda/Ted). Many thanks go to wanderlight and ressie_noldo for beta-reading and putting up with writerly tantrums. Written before the release of Deathly Hallows.
“What we call the beginning is often the end
And to make and end is to make a beginning.
The end is where we start from.”
- T.S Eliot, “Little Gidding”
i.
"I’m leaving this family - I will not be like the rest of you, mad and murderous, hands covered in blood. None of you give a damn about anyone else. I’m leaving, and I’m going to start a new life."
No-one heard her whisper "I’m sorry".
ii.
Up three flights of stairs, and there it was: a simple wooden door, the white paint peeling and more than a few scratches on it. Ted smiled, pulled out a Muggle key, and unlocked it. "It’s charmed against most opening spells," he said.
She stepped inside, and almost stumbled back out again. It was small and dingy, the lights barely penetrating the corners of the room. The couch was old and worn - possibly older than she was. The only new thing in the room was Ted’s - what was it? Telesight? Tele-eye? Television - that was it. No respectable Black would ever live in a place like this.
It was in a Muggle apartment building, in a Muggle part of town. This wasn’t Grimmauld Place, where hexes awaited any Muggle who tried to enter. This wasn’t home, not for a Black.
She wasn’t a Black anymore.
"What do you think?" Ted asked, obviously worried about her reaction.
"It’s perfect," she said. "It’s ours."
iii.
It was an odd sight: Dumbledore, the greatest wizard in the world, the only one that You-Know-Who feared, was perched on top of their stove. Both Andromeda and Ted understood why, of course. Their apartment didn’t have a fireplace, and Floo powder needed a consistent flame, so the stove it was. (Ted wondered what strings Dumbledore had to pull to get a stove added to the Floo network for the day.)
Ted caught Andromeda’s eye, and she smiled at him, patting her very pregnant stomach. He wasn’t sure how he’d gotten so lucky; marrying the only girl he’d ever loved. He’d soon be a father, too - a little witch, the Mediwizards said. He grinned.
His happiness faded with Dumbledore’s first words. "I’m sorry, Andromeda. Neither you nor Ted can be a part of the Order."
"Why?" she asked sharply. "Because I was born a Black? Because I’m a pureblood? Because he married me?"
"You’re targets," Dumbledore said simply. "Most of the Death Eaters would like to personally kill both of you. The Order can’t afford that."
"Who are you planning to recruit? The Death Eaters would like to kill all Mudbloods and blood traitors. The Death Eaters will only permit Death Eaters to live."
"You insulted the Black family when you left. Bellatrix is one of Voldemort’s" - Ted cringed at the name - "most trusted aides. Narcissa’s husband, Lucius Malfoy, is another. They all want you dead, and Ted with you. They can, and would, hunt you down and kill you. You cannot be on the front lines."
"Is the entire Order on the front lines?" Ted asked.
"Yes." Dumbledore frowned. "You have a family now. You’ll have a child soon. Do you want to risk all that to stop Voldemort?"
"Yes," Andromeda said, and then looked at Ted. "No. I’m not sure. We won’t let You Know Who take over without a fight."
"We cannot let you join the Order, but help you certainly can. If you both keep a low profile, you can gather information for us. It’s not as glorious as the Order, but it’s just as needed."
"I gave up glory when I left the Blacks." Dumbledore turned the stove on, and tossed a bit of Floo powder on it. Just as he began to disappear into the flames, Ted managed to quickly thank him.
iv.
Andromeda arrived at St. Mungo’s in the early afternoon, wearing her best cloak. It was getting a bit threadbare, since her mother had bought it for her coming of age party, some four years before. There wasn’t much money to spare in the Tonks household. Still, she looked professional - professional enough, she hoped, to be hired.
St. Mungo’s wasn’t where she would have chosen to work, but Dumbledore needed an informant inside. She had the required NEWTs to be a curse breaker, so at least she would be doing some good.
She walked up to the registration desk. "I have a job interview as a curse breaker."
"Right this way, please." The guide - a long-haired blonde that wouldn’t have looked out of place in the Muggle world - walked quickly down a corridor. "There it is."
"Thank you," she said, stepping inside the dim room. She could almost make out two people in the far corner of the room, one sitting at a desk and another leaning against it. "Andromeda Tonks, here for an interview," she said crisply.
"Ah. We’ve been expecting you. If you’ve made it this far, you have the required credentials, correct?"
"Yes, sir. Nine OWLs, and five NEWTs: History of Magic, Transfiguration, Charms, Defense Against the Dark Arts and Potions."
"Good. In these times of war, I’m afraid we must ask. Are you a Pureblood, half-blood, or Muggleborn?"
"Pureblood, sir."
"Name of your family and house at Hogwarts?" Andromeda cringed a bit.
"Black, and Slytherin."
The second man spoke for the first time. "Are you here to break curses or make sure they never get well?" he said nastily.
"I broke off with my family several years ago, sir. I don’t exist to them."
"Good cover story," the second man snarled. "You’re probably just a Death Eater trying to infiltrate St. Mungo’s."
"However," the first man said, "we do have a shortage of curse breakers. We’ll take you - but only on probation. If there is any sign of mistreatment, you will be sacked and tried for your crimes."
"You’re too soft, John," the second man said. "Barty Crouch has it right - they’re all sympathizers, active or not. You’ll regret this decision. She’ll be just like her family."
Andromeda left the room quickly, not looking back. Was there no one wouldn't, who didn’t judge on blood heritage?
v.
She came home late, so tired she was afraid to try Apparating into the apartment. She wanted to collapse into oblivion, but her husband and daughter were waiting for her. Slowly, painfully, she climbed the stairs up the apartment.
She unlocked the door, and stepped inside. Ted was sitting on the couch, a bottle of Firewhiskey at his side, watching Muggle sports. Nymphadora was leaning on him, fast asleep.
"Andi! I was beginning to wonder if you were ever coming home," Ted said.
"Hard day at work," she said dully.
"What’s wrong, love?" he said, putting aside the Firewhiskey, gently moving Nymphadora aside, and walked over to her.
"Ten cursed Muggleborns. Six of them died." She didn’t sound angry or even upset - just dulled and emotionless, as if she’d seen too much to bear.
"Andi, you saved four lives today. No one else could have."
"It should have been ten!" she yelled. "I lost six patients! Six of them! Any one of them could have been someone like you."
"Don’t yell, Andi. You’ll wake Nymphadora."
"Nymphadora needs to know what kind of world she lives in," she said coldly, every bit a Black. Ted looked away, trying not to notice how much she looked like her sisters in that moment. She was Andi now, not one of them. She was his now. Her family couldn’t change that.
"Andromeda, calm down. You saved lives today."
"I lost lives today," she said. "You could have been one of them."
"Andromeda, no. You know we’re some of the best-protected people in the wizarding world. We’re hidden, and we’re safe, Andi."
"And we let people die for us. Do you know what one of them said before he died? He named his killer."
"We’ll tell Dumbledore, and he will catch the killer. We may not be in the Order, but that doesn’t mean we’re helpless."
"I don’t think so," she said icily. "Bellatrix killed them. My sister killed six people, and tried to kill four more."
Ted was silent. He knew this wasn’t the first time Bellatrix had killed, nor would it be the last. She’d boasted in school that she’d killed before, when she warned him to stay away from Andi. He didn’t think she’d stopped since then.
"Say something, Ted," she whispered. "My sister. My family kills for fun. I’m one of them - I will always be one of them. And they would kill me if they had the chance."
"Oh, really?" he said, matching her earlier tone. "I’d thought that Nymphadora and I were your family. I thought you left them forever. It seems I was mistaken." He turned away, trying to keep his eyes from filling with tears.
"I hate them." She looked at Nymphadora, still asleep on the couch. "I ran from them, and still they follow me, everywhere I go. All I want is this - our family. Why can’t they leave me alone?" Her voice cracked. "How can we fight against them? They’re too strong."
"We’re still here, Andi. We’ll win this war yet." Ted put his arms around her, and held her as she cried.
vi.
"Have you heard? Have you heard? Have you heard?" The news was all over St. Mungo’s: Voldemort was gone, presumed dead. Andromeda couldn’t stop smiling. Two more had died in the last attack, but it was the very last attack. The war was over.
She called an early end to the day, and Apparated home. She didn’t stay, instead walking over to the Muggle "day care" center down the street to pick up Nymphadora. Nymphadora was, as always, delighted to see her, and babbled about her day’s exploits as they walked home, hand-in-hand.
"Daddy should be home soon," she said. "We have big news to talk to you about."
"Am I getting a new brother or sister? Kimmie’s getting one." Nymphadora smiled for a moment, and then cocked her head to the side. "I’m not sure I want a baby brother," she said, clinging to Andromeda.
"No, Nymphadora, I’m not pregnant. You know the war that Daddy and I have been worried about?" Nymphadora nodded, her face clouding. "Our side won. The bad guys are gone. We don’t have to worry as much, and you’ll be able to get a proper magic education soon."
Nymphadora grinned. "It’s like Doctor Who! The good guys always win, even when it’s scary!" she exclaimed. Andromeda had to stop herself from rolling her eyes. Nymphadora had been going on about the show for months, and her father shared her obsession. Some things, not even a war can change. Nymphadora paused for a moment, and said, "Really? You mean I can learn magic like you and Daddy?"
"Yes, love." There was a bang of displaced air from the bedroom, and Ted strode into the room. He swept up Nymphadora, holding her close. "You’ve heard, then," he said to Andromeda.
"It’s over. Thank Merlin, it’s over, and we made it through. We’re finally safe." She looked over at her husband and daughter, and smiled. “It’s just us now.”