When Everything Changed - IX
Fandom: Naruto
Pairing: Kakashi x Sakura
Rating: T
Summary: Wherein decisions are made and the budding of emotions are discovered.
When Everything Changed - part IX
Refreshed, Kakashi and Sakura made their way to the clinic where their comrades welcomed them warmly. Naoya, of course, had a few choice words to say concerning Kakashi leaving with a patient.
"Word from Tsunade-sama came earlier," Kiku announced as she produced a pair of scrolls. One she handed to Sakura while the other was given to Kakashi. The duo shared a look before opening and reading their respective scrolls.
Kakashi finished first and waited on Sakura. Once she was done, he leaned over to her and whispered, "We should talk."
She nodded and then thanked Kiku before they took their leave. He followed her down the hall to an empty room, and then shut the door firmly behind him after they entered.
Sakura sat with a sigh. "She wants a follow-up report - what we've found, the progress we've made, and the such. But after she reads what I have to say, I have a feeling that we'll get to go home. Sounds good, doesn't it?"
His eye crinkled in a smile, but even she could tell it was forced. "Of course it does."
Something was amiss and she deflated. "We're not going home, are we?"
His jaw tightened in reflex. After everything they had been through he didn't want to have to tell her this. "You are."
She sat up a little straighter. "I... I don't understand."
"I'm leaving from here to go on another mission."
"What?" She jumped from her seat. "But you've just recovered. I can't let you go -"
"Tsunade doesn't know that, and besides it's my job, Sakura. I'm just supposed to put some of the daimyo's fears at ease. It's a simple mission."
"Your definition of simple or Naruto's?"
A gray brow lifted in question. "What's that supposed to mean?"
"Naruto's definition of simple is like following the directions on a cup of ramen. Your definition is like translating the series of books on the science, systems, and nature of chakra networks into five different languages."
"Well, it's not like that's particularly challenging," he replied after thinking on it for a moment.
"See?!" She jabbed him in the chest with her finger. "After all that we went through-"
"I know, Sakura," he interrupted, taking her hand and pulling her back to her chair. She sat with a grumble.
"Look at me," his soothing voice coaxed.
Sakura took a deep breath and turned her eyes up to him, her lips still turned in an impressive pout. He squeezed her knee for reassurance. "I promise I'll try my best to be careful."
"You had better! Cause you won't have me there to save your ass," she muttered.
He smiled a little, though the reality of her saving his life was still quite vivid and the consequences and potential loss was overwhelming, still, to him. "And I promise that the first thing I'll do when I return is come see you."
Her lips parted in surprise and her ears went pink. "Wh-why would you say that?"
He ruffled her hair. "Can't have you worrying off that pretty little head of yours."
She glared up at him. "Quit it or I'm breaking that hand."
He promptly removed his hand and offered another grin, the eye crinkle a little more genuine this time.
As Sakura found herself fixing her hair for the second time, she couldn't help but feel as if something was going to happen. It didn't feel right that Tsunade would send him out alone again so soon, especially when there were other capable ninja. "Why does it have to be you?" she wondered aloud.
"Because the daimyo specifically requested me."
She hadn't been expecting an answer and was a bit startled to receive one. She didn't want to ask her follow up question, but it was important. "When do you leave?"
With a straight face that betrayed any mixed emotions, he answered, "Nightfall."
Her eyes widened in disbelief. "Tonight?"
He nodded and then watched with a pain in his chest as she became crestfallen, dropping her hands in her lap. He didn't understand how seeing her like that was having such an effect on him. He had no idea that she was fighting her own internal battle, worrying over how long he'd be gone or if he'd even come back.
Her face was full of anger and disbelief, passing along each of her features, but then again she had always been easy to read. He could tell that she wanted to say something more, but she was unsure of herself.
"Kakashi-"
She watched as he suddenly stood and walked over to the door. "I still have a few things to take care of here before I make my preparations for the journey. You still have business to attend to as well. You'll have plenty of time to say what you want when we're both done."
Would she? He had said that to her before and her chance had nearly been taken away. She didn't understand why he always seemed to pull away whenever she really wanted to say something to him. However, Kakashi merely wanted to give her time to reflect and gather her thoughts before she said anything brashly.
Time with Kakashi was all Sakura wanted, but it seemed she never had enough. They were always pulled apart by something and it wasn't fair. But she wasn't going to burden him with her childish whining. Instead she only nodded. "You're right. Go ahead and I'll see you later."
He could still see and hear the disappointment, even though she had attempted to mask it. He had been looking forward to traveling home with her, but there was nothing he could do now except bear it.
He offered her a wave and a smile before slipping out the door. As it began to creak close, she got up and yanked it open, hoping to catch him, but he was already gone. She let out a frustrated sigh before closing her eyes and getting herself together. He was right, she still had work to do and she couldn't very well be doing it with him on her mind.
However, not thinking about Kakashi was more of a challenge than she had considered. Waking up beside him in bed had not only surprised her, but it also sort of - kind of - felt nice. Kakashi had always been different to her; he hadn't really been her teacher. Well, technically he had been, but he had been more interested in helping the boys than her. It was an oversight that he had owned up to long ago and she had forgiven him for it. Kakashi was never a father figure or like a brother; he had always been an awkward commander, a mooching comrade... up until she shattered the ground beneath him, then he became just a mooching comrade.
Even with his laziness, and poor reading habits, and the way he always stuck her with the bill, he was someone she trusted, adored, and cared for. She knew that he would protect her with his life - and she would do all she could to ensure that he would never have to, that his life would remain his. She loved him and looked out for him just as she did with all the important people in her life.
But there was something different about Kakashi, something she couldn't quite put her finger on, but she could feel whenever he was around. It was that same something that made smiles come without effort, that made her body feel lighter whenever she found him unexpectedly waiting for her. It was what made her turn off her radio that night, what pushed her beyond her limits in the forest to save his life. She knew that death was an occupational hazard, but she had meant it when she said she wasn't ready to lose him. Without him, there would just be an empty void in her world, an ugly scar where there once was beauty.
"She's behaving so strangely."
"Ever since she came out of that room. Do you think something happened?"
"Beats me. I'm only here as an extra set of hands."
"Naoya, you're no fun. Come on, admit it, you've never seen her like that. I bet something's wrong."
Sakura sighed, Haruko had been chatting up Naoya all afternoon. While Sakura had fully heard the gossip and speculation coming from Haruko, she kept quiet. She really didn't feel like shouting at her; she didn't have the energy to. Maybe something was wrong with her.
"Haruko-chan!"
Sakura glanced over her shoulder as Kiku approached, eyes narrowed. "Don't you have anything better to do than stand around and talk? At least Naoya's pretending to be busy with a chart in his hands. Go check on the patients before I make you scrub out the bedpans!"
Sakura grinned to herself as she continued scribbling notes in a chart and then in the report she was preparing for Tsunade.
"Haruno-san has more important matters to tend to than entertaining your imagination," Kiku called after her. She leaned back against the desk where Sakura was working. "Besides anyone with eyes and a brain knows that you're simply in love."
Sakura froze and turned to face her, a skeptical look creasing her brow. "And what in the world makes you think that?"
"You risked your life to save him, didn't you?"
"I'd do that for anyone," Sakura replied and then began to work again.
"You even downplayed your injuries so he'd get treated first."
"Because I had myself taken care of already."
Kiku pursed her lips to the side. "And you've been sighing all day. You were smiling and happy when you came in, but ever since Kakashi-san left you've been downtrodden. I know that look, Haruno-san, I've worn it myself a time or two."
"Didn't you say that I had better things to do than to entertain someone's imagination?"
Kiku straightened and bowed her head. "You're right. Please forgive me for crossing any boundaries, Haruno-san."
Sakura smiled at her. "It's alright."
"Then, I may cross one more, but I think you should tell him. From the moment we come into this world, our days start to count down, and in our line of work you never know when that last day will come." Her eyes softened. "Wouldn't it be better to take another risk than to regret never letting him know how you feel and wonder what might have been?"
"I'd regret letting the villagers drink water still contaminated. Please go check the levels."
"Yes, Haruno-san."
"And Kiku, I appreciate the advice."
The woman nodded with a small smile before heading out towards the front of the clinic. Sakura turned back to her report and started copying some figures down.
Her hands moved on autopilot. What Kiku said resonated within her; did she love Kakashi? Well, of course she loved him. She loved Naruto, Ino, Yamato, and even Sai, too. But was the love she felt for him different? Being around Naruto didn't make her heart race. Sai never made her blush, quite the opposite actually when it came to him. She enjoyed the time with her boys, but whenever Kakashi left she could feel some kind of longing for him to return.
Thinking back on it, she wasn't even sure when it really began. There just came a time that her stomach would get uneasy when he didn't return from a mission on time, when she found herself looking at him a little longer and her curiosity about him grew, when she didn't care if he bailed on the bill - as long as she just got to be with him. There were days she'd just find herself thinking about him - how he was doing, what he was doing, who he may be with.
She had fought so fervently to save him yesterday, she had even been blinded by rage. The way she felt when she found he was alive, that overwhelming relief and happiness that could have made her burst apart at the seams, was unlike anything she had ever experienced. His admission to her warmed her spirit; the sincerity within his confession seeped into her along with his warmth as he had pulled her near. To think now that he had carried her all the way to their lodging and then crawled in beside her made her cheeks grow hot. She paused and laid her palms against her cheeks.
She closed her eyes, remembering how it felt to slowly come into the waking world and find him beside her, his arm over her middle, his face beneath her touch. Her lips tingled, a minute sensation that made her wonder what it would feel like to kiss him. Her eyes popped open and her hands dropped away, shock washing over her from head to toe. Kiku was right, on some level at least, she was falling for the man.
Peeking at the clock, Sakura got back to work on her report, driving thoughts of Kakashi from her mind. She needed to wrap it up so that she could get to him before he had to leave.
.x.X.x.
The sun was already dropping in the sky by the time Sakura made it out of the clinic, her report rolled and clutched tightly in her hands. When she made it to their room she was disappointed to find it empty. But Kakashi had been there as his bag was packed and rested neatly by the door.
She rushed over to her pack and began to rummage through it, leaving her once organized items in disarray as she found everything she needed. She didn't care that clothes and personal items were laying at her feet. Kakashi didn't exactly have the best track record of making it out of sticky situations unscathed, and so she was putting together anything extra she could for him.
Of course it was her luck that he'd come back before she could finish putting her belongings back in order. He eyed the tiny mess around her from the doorway. "Did I catch you at a bad time?"
She shook her head as she began stuffing her items back into her bag, her nose picking up the scent of meat and rice. She paused and looked up at him and the containers in his hands. "What's that?"
"Dinner," he answered with a smile and finally stepped inside, pushing the door closed.
"It smells good."
"Then you should come eat while it's hot. What were you doing anyway?"
"It can wait, I'm starving," she said, emphasizing her statement with a pat to her stomach. It didn't dawn on her that she hadn't eaten in over a day until Kakashi began to take the lids off. The steaming hot foods were a welcome sight and smell.
He picked up a few pieces of meat with his chopsticks and set them atop her rice. "Eat up."
She smiled warmly at him before digging in. "You didn't have to do this, but thank you," she said after swallowing her first bite.
"I figured I owed you a meal... and I miss eating with you."
"And there's no bill to skip on, so that's a plus."
"You always have to bring that up, don't you?" he deadpanned.
She pointed her chopsticks at him. "It's no fun if I can't tease you just a little bit."
Kakashi found her smile infectious and he was grinning along with her. Dinner was fun and the conversation that went along with it was light hearted. They both knew his departure was coming and there was no need to dwell on it. He just wanted to share his time with her and see her smile - and as if reading his mind, she offered many of them.
He poured them both some milk and sat back, crossing his feet at the ankles as he turned his attention to the window and the setting sun beyond.
"That was really good, I'm stuffed," she admitted in a quiet voice as she followed his gaze.
"Me, too."
The sky was washed with color, but nothing could outdo the blazing oranges and reds as the glorious sun dipped below the horizon. "I know we don't have a lot of time, so-" She stood and went over to her bag where she retrieved the care package she threw together. She set it in front of him on the table. "It's not much, but I want you to take it."
His eye roved over the extra pouch of kunai, the med-kit, bandages, and ration bars. "But your trip back-"
"I can buy some food from here if I need it, and I still have a set of shuriken. I'll be fine. I don't know how far you have to travel or how long you'll be gone and you'll need supplies more than I will. I can't be beside you, so please just take it."
He stared at her in silence, in quiet awe, in gratitude. She truly was thinking of his well-being; not being able to go with him, to ensure he would be okay, was hard for her in this moment. The soft smile on her face wasn't fooling him. He knew behind it that she was worried, and he was touched that there was someone that still cared for him so deeply. The warmth of her gesture spread throughout his body, and he found himself wishing he could stay with her - for just another night, just to lie with her one more time.
The sudden yearning nearly caught him off-guard, and he took a quick deep breath to dispel it. His hand rested atop the items and his eye creased in a smile. "Thank you, Sakura."
She nodded and turned around, hoping to hide the blooming tint to her cheeks, but Kakashi rarely ever missed a thing.
"If you have your report finished you can give it to me. I was going to send Pakkun back to Tsunade tonight."
She picked up her scroll and handed it to him, their fingertips grazing each other. Kiku's kind face and her good intentioned advice sprang forth in Sakura's mind. Wouldn't doing it this way, right before he leaves, be a cowardly move? Was she even sure of herself or her feelings? But what if something were to happen to him? Then he'd never know that she felt something for him, and everyone deserved to know that they were loved. Wasn't that all anyone wanted in this life?
He reached back and grabbed his pack, putting their scrolls and the provisions she had given him inside. She knew that if she didn't act now, there might never be another opportunity.
"Wait! I... I have something else to give you for your trip," she blurted out before she could put any further thought into it, because she knew that if she did she might just talk herself out of it.
Her outburst seemed to have startled him a little and he looked back at her with a cocked brow. "You don't have to give me anything else, Sakura. You've done enough."
Her pulse quickened. "But I want to! It's just... another little thing that I can't let you leave without." His head tilted to the side, blatant curiosity in his gaze. She could almost feel herself shrink beneath it. "What?"
He shook his head. "I'm just wondering what else it could be, you've already given me so much."
Her lips pressed into a thin line as she inhaled deeply to calm her nerves - it was now or never - and then her mouth popped open with a tiny sound as she leaned down to his level. "You have to close your eyes, though. It's a surprise."
He studied her face and her sparkling eyes and decided to go along with it. "Okay," he agreed with a sigh and closed his eye.
Her hands reached for his face, hovering near his cheeks. She was really going to do this, wasn't she? She couldn't very well back out now; he'd likely think her to be mad if she just poked him in the face and said 'just kidding!' She swallowed and then gripped the outer edge of his hitai-ate.
He stiffened and made a move to stop her, but then she said, "I just want to make sure you don't peek, don't worry."
He sounded a bit apprehensive as he spoke up. "Is this really necessary? I can be a good boy and not peek."
Her breath caught in her throat. His voice was low and sounded huskier to her ears than he probably intended. She blinked and shook her head. "Of course it is!"
His soft chuckle was almost a tease itself and she flicked the metal protector of his hitai-ate. "So mean, Sakura-chan."
"You're really making me second guess this gift," she murmured.
"Okay, I'll behave."
She found herself smiling as she looked at his covered eyes. Her heart began to speed, nearly galloping out of her chest as the moment drew near. She could feel that her palms were hot, and her fingers twitched as she reached for him - just like that very morning when she touched him as he slept. She was so close. "Do you remember what you promised me in the office this morning?"
Wondering why she was bringing that up all of a sudden, but dismissing it all the same, he replied. "Of course I do."
"I've always considered you a man of your word," she admitted just above a whisper before her fingers slipped his mask down and she rushed in for a kiss.
Her brow knit with anxiety and disbelief as their mouths met. She could feel him and his warmth, but it all felt so surreal. His lips were soft, the bottom one more plump than the top she found as she pressed a bit more firm against him. But he wasn't responding, he was as stiff as a board, and mortification began to seep into her. The thing she feared most was happening. Her mind was already coming up with excuses and apologies before she even began to draw away.
Not even the space of an inch existed between them before his hands caught her face and pulled her back in. Her eyes widened in surprise as his mouth claimed hers, as he matched her tenderness and then surpassed her in intensity. Her breath came quick, as if she couldn't gain enough oxygen, as the anxiety she felt before melted away into something else.
But then his lips - his sweet, intoxicating kiss - began to slow. Then as abruptly as he kissed her, he stopped and pulled back from her in his chair. Her lips tingled with electric warmth and she could feel that he was waiting on her, for something, anything. After he began kissing her all of her reasoning, her excuses, were forgotten and she said the only thing she had left.
"Keep your promise to me."
Pairing: Kakashi x Sakura
Rating: T
Summary: Wherein decisions are made and the budding of emotions are discovered.
When Everything Changed - part IX
Refreshed, Kakashi and Sakura made their way to the clinic where their comrades welcomed them warmly. Naoya, of course, had a few choice words to say concerning Kakashi leaving with a patient.
"Word from Tsunade-sama came earlier," Kiku announced as she produced a pair of scrolls. One she handed to Sakura while the other was given to Kakashi. The duo shared a look before opening and reading their respective scrolls.
Kakashi finished first and waited on Sakura. Once she was done, he leaned over to her and whispered, "We should talk."
She nodded and then thanked Kiku before they took their leave. He followed her down the hall to an empty room, and then shut the door firmly behind him after they entered.
Sakura sat with a sigh. "She wants a follow-up report - what we've found, the progress we've made, and the such. But after she reads what I have to say, I have a feeling that we'll get to go home. Sounds good, doesn't it?"
His eye crinkled in a smile, but even she could tell it was forced. "Of course it does."
Something was amiss and she deflated. "We're not going home, are we?"
His jaw tightened in reflex. After everything they had been through he didn't want to have to tell her this. "You are."
She sat up a little straighter. "I... I don't understand."
"I'm leaving from here to go on another mission."
"What?" She jumped from her seat. "But you've just recovered. I can't let you go -"
"Tsunade doesn't know that, and besides it's my job, Sakura. I'm just supposed to put some of the daimyo's fears at ease. It's a simple mission."
"Your definition of simple or Naruto's?"
A gray brow lifted in question. "What's that supposed to mean?"
"Naruto's definition of simple is like following the directions on a cup of ramen. Your definition is like translating the series of books on the science, systems, and nature of chakra networks into five different languages."
"Well, it's not like that's particularly challenging," he replied after thinking on it for a moment.
"See?!" She jabbed him in the chest with her finger. "After all that we went through-"
"I know, Sakura," he interrupted, taking her hand and pulling her back to her chair. She sat with a grumble.
"Look at me," his soothing voice coaxed.
Sakura took a deep breath and turned her eyes up to him, her lips still turned in an impressive pout. He squeezed her knee for reassurance. "I promise I'll try my best to be careful."
"You had better! Cause you won't have me there to save your ass," she muttered.
He smiled a little, though the reality of her saving his life was still quite vivid and the consequences and potential loss was overwhelming, still, to him. "And I promise that the first thing I'll do when I return is come see you."
Her lips parted in surprise and her ears went pink. "Wh-why would you say that?"
He ruffled her hair. "Can't have you worrying off that pretty little head of yours."
She glared up at him. "Quit it or I'm breaking that hand."
He promptly removed his hand and offered another grin, the eye crinkle a little more genuine this time.
As Sakura found herself fixing her hair for the second time, she couldn't help but feel as if something was going to happen. It didn't feel right that Tsunade would send him out alone again so soon, especially when there were other capable ninja. "Why does it have to be you?" she wondered aloud.
"Because the daimyo specifically requested me."
She hadn't been expecting an answer and was a bit startled to receive one. She didn't want to ask her follow up question, but it was important. "When do you leave?"
With a straight face that betrayed any mixed emotions, he answered, "Nightfall."
Her eyes widened in disbelief. "Tonight?"
He nodded and then watched with a pain in his chest as she became crestfallen, dropping her hands in her lap. He didn't understand how seeing her like that was having such an effect on him. He had no idea that she was fighting her own internal battle, worrying over how long he'd be gone or if he'd even come back.
Her face was full of anger and disbelief, passing along each of her features, but then again she had always been easy to read. He could tell that she wanted to say something more, but she was unsure of herself.
"Kakashi-"
She watched as he suddenly stood and walked over to the door. "I still have a few things to take care of here before I make my preparations for the journey. You still have business to attend to as well. You'll have plenty of time to say what you want when we're both done."
Would she? He had said that to her before and her chance had nearly been taken away. She didn't understand why he always seemed to pull away whenever she really wanted to say something to him. However, Kakashi merely wanted to give her time to reflect and gather her thoughts before she said anything brashly.
Time with Kakashi was all Sakura wanted, but it seemed she never had enough. They were always pulled apart by something and it wasn't fair. But she wasn't going to burden him with her childish whining. Instead she only nodded. "You're right. Go ahead and I'll see you later."
He could still see and hear the disappointment, even though she had attempted to mask it. He had been looking forward to traveling home with her, but there was nothing he could do now except bear it.
He offered her a wave and a smile before slipping out the door. As it began to creak close, she got up and yanked it open, hoping to catch him, but he was already gone. She let out a frustrated sigh before closing her eyes and getting herself together. He was right, she still had work to do and she couldn't very well be doing it with him on her mind.
However, not thinking about Kakashi was more of a challenge than she had considered. Waking up beside him in bed had not only surprised her, but it also sort of - kind of - felt nice. Kakashi had always been different to her; he hadn't really been her teacher. Well, technically he had been, but he had been more interested in helping the boys than her. It was an oversight that he had owned up to long ago and she had forgiven him for it. Kakashi was never a father figure or like a brother; he had always been an awkward commander, a mooching comrade... up until she shattered the ground beneath him, then he became just a mooching comrade.
Even with his laziness, and poor reading habits, and the way he always stuck her with the bill, he was someone she trusted, adored, and cared for. She knew that he would protect her with his life - and she would do all she could to ensure that he would never have to, that his life would remain his. She loved him and looked out for him just as she did with all the important people in her life.
But there was something different about Kakashi, something she couldn't quite put her finger on, but she could feel whenever he was around. It was that same something that made smiles come without effort, that made her body feel lighter whenever she found him unexpectedly waiting for her. It was what made her turn off her radio that night, what pushed her beyond her limits in the forest to save his life. She knew that death was an occupational hazard, but she had meant it when she said she wasn't ready to lose him. Without him, there would just be an empty void in her world, an ugly scar where there once was beauty.
"She's behaving so strangely."
"Ever since she came out of that room. Do you think something happened?"
"Beats me. I'm only here as an extra set of hands."
"Naoya, you're no fun. Come on, admit it, you've never seen her like that. I bet something's wrong."
Sakura sighed, Haruko had been chatting up Naoya all afternoon. While Sakura had fully heard the gossip and speculation coming from Haruko, she kept quiet. She really didn't feel like shouting at her; she didn't have the energy to. Maybe something was wrong with her.
"Haruko-chan!"
Sakura glanced over her shoulder as Kiku approached, eyes narrowed. "Don't you have anything better to do than stand around and talk? At least Naoya's pretending to be busy with a chart in his hands. Go check on the patients before I make you scrub out the bedpans!"
Sakura grinned to herself as she continued scribbling notes in a chart and then in the report she was preparing for Tsunade.
"Haruno-san has more important matters to tend to than entertaining your imagination," Kiku called after her. She leaned back against the desk where Sakura was working. "Besides anyone with eyes and a brain knows that you're simply in love."
Sakura froze and turned to face her, a skeptical look creasing her brow. "And what in the world makes you think that?"
"You risked your life to save him, didn't you?"
"I'd do that for anyone," Sakura replied and then began to work again.
"You even downplayed your injuries so he'd get treated first."
"Because I had myself taken care of already."
Kiku pursed her lips to the side. "And you've been sighing all day. You were smiling and happy when you came in, but ever since Kakashi-san left you've been downtrodden. I know that look, Haruno-san, I've worn it myself a time or two."
"Didn't you say that I had better things to do than to entertain someone's imagination?"
Kiku straightened and bowed her head. "You're right. Please forgive me for crossing any boundaries, Haruno-san."
Sakura smiled at her. "It's alright."
"Then, I may cross one more, but I think you should tell him. From the moment we come into this world, our days start to count down, and in our line of work you never know when that last day will come." Her eyes softened. "Wouldn't it be better to take another risk than to regret never letting him know how you feel and wonder what might have been?"
"I'd regret letting the villagers drink water still contaminated. Please go check the levels."
"Yes, Haruno-san."
"And Kiku, I appreciate the advice."
The woman nodded with a small smile before heading out towards the front of the clinic. Sakura turned back to her report and started copying some figures down.
Her hands moved on autopilot. What Kiku said resonated within her; did she love Kakashi? Well, of course she loved him. She loved Naruto, Ino, Yamato, and even Sai, too. But was the love she felt for him different? Being around Naruto didn't make her heart race. Sai never made her blush, quite the opposite actually when it came to him. She enjoyed the time with her boys, but whenever Kakashi left she could feel some kind of longing for him to return.
Thinking back on it, she wasn't even sure when it really began. There just came a time that her stomach would get uneasy when he didn't return from a mission on time, when she found herself looking at him a little longer and her curiosity about him grew, when she didn't care if he bailed on the bill - as long as she just got to be with him. There were days she'd just find herself thinking about him - how he was doing, what he was doing, who he may be with.
She had fought so fervently to save him yesterday, she had even been blinded by rage. The way she felt when she found he was alive, that overwhelming relief and happiness that could have made her burst apart at the seams, was unlike anything she had ever experienced. His admission to her warmed her spirit; the sincerity within his confession seeped into her along with his warmth as he had pulled her near. To think now that he had carried her all the way to their lodging and then crawled in beside her made her cheeks grow hot. She paused and laid her palms against her cheeks.
She closed her eyes, remembering how it felt to slowly come into the waking world and find him beside her, his arm over her middle, his face beneath her touch. Her lips tingled, a minute sensation that made her wonder what it would feel like to kiss him. Her eyes popped open and her hands dropped away, shock washing over her from head to toe. Kiku was right, on some level at least, she was falling for the man.
Peeking at the clock, Sakura got back to work on her report, driving thoughts of Kakashi from her mind. She needed to wrap it up so that she could get to him before he had to leave.
.x.X.x.
The sun was already dropping in the sky by the time Sakura made it out of the clinic, her report rolled and clutched tightly in her hands. When she made it to their room she was disappointed to find it empty. But Kakashi had been there as his bag was packed and rested neatly by the door.
She rushed over to her pack and began to rummage through it, leaving her once organized items in disarray as she found everything she needed. She didn't care that clothes and personal items were laying at her feet. Kakashi didn't exactly have the best track record of making it out of sticky situations unscathed, and so she was putting together anything extra she could for him.
Of course it was her luck that he'd come back before she could finish putting her belongings back in order. He eyed the tiny mess around her from the doorway. "Did I catch you at a bad time?"
She shook her head as she began stuffing her items back into her bag, her nose picking up the scent of meat and rice. She paused and looked up at him and the containers in his hands. "What's that?"
"Dinner," he answered with a smile and finally stepped inside, pushing the door closed.
"It smells good."
"Then you should come eat while it's hot. What were you doing anyway?"
"It can wait, I'm starving," she said, emphasizing her statement with a pat to her stomach. It didn't dawn on her that she hadn't eaten in over a day until Kakashi began to take the lids off. The steaming hot foods were a welcome sight and smell.
He picked up a few pieces of meat with his chopsticks and set them atop her rice. "Eat up."
She smiled warmly at him before digging in. "You didn't have to do this, but thank you," she said after swallowing her first bite.
"I figured I owed you a meal... and I miss eating with you."
"And there's no bill to skip on, so that's a plus."
"You always have to bring that up, don't you?" he deadpanned.
She pointed her chopsticks at him. "It's no fun if I can't tease you just a little bit."
Kakashi found her smile infectious and he was grinning along with her. Dinner was fun and the conversation that went along with it was light hearted. They both knew his departure was coming and there was no need to dwell on it. He just wanted to share his time with her and see her smile - and as if reading his mind, she offered many of them.
He poured them both some milk and sat back, crossing his feet at the ankles as he turned his attention to the window and the setting sun beyond.
"That was really good, I'm stuffed," she admitted in a quiet voice as she followed his gaze.
"Me, too."
The sky was washed with color, but nothing could outdo the blazing oranges and reds as the glorious sun dipped below the horizon. "I know we don't have a lot of time, so-" She stood and went over to her bag where she retrieved the care package she threw together. She set it in front of him on the table. "It's not much, but I want you to take it."
His eye roved over the extra pouch of kunai, the med-kit, bandages, and ration bars. "But your trip back-"
"I can buy some food from here if I need it, and I still have a set of shuriken. I'll be fine. I don't know how far you have to travel or how long you'll be gone and you'll need supplies more than I will. I can't be beside you, so please just take it."
He stared at her in silence, in quiet awe, in gratitude. She truly was thinking of his well-being; not being able to go with him, to ensure he would be okay, was hard for her in this moment. The soft smile on her face wasn't fooling him. He knew behind it that she was worried, and he was touched that there was someone that still cared for him so deeply. The warmth of her gesture spread throughout his body, and he found himself wishing he could stay with her - for just another night, just to lie with her one more time.
The sudden yearning nearly caught him off-guard, and he took a quick deep breath to dispel it. His hand rested atop the items and his eye creased in a smile. "Thank you, Sakura."
She nodded and turned around, hoping to hide the blooming tint to her cheeks, but Kakashi rarely ever missed a thing.
"If you have your report finished you can give it to me. I was going to send Pakkun back to Tsunade tonight."
She picked up her scroll and handed it to him, their fingertips grazing each other. Kiku's kind face and her good intentioned advice sprang forth in Sakura's mind. Wouldn't doing it this way, right before he leaves, be a cowardly move? Was she even sure of herself or her feelings? But what if something were to happen to him? Then he'd never know that she felt something for him, and everyone deserved to know that they were loved. Wasn't that all anyone wanted in this life?
He reached back and grabbed his pack, putting their scrolls and the provisions she had given him inside. She knew that if she didn't act now, there might never be another opportunity.
"Wait! I... I have something else to give you for your trip," she blurted out before she could put any further thought into it, because she knew that if she did she might just talk herself out of it.
Her outburst seemed to have startled him a little and he looked back at her with a cocked brow. "You don't have to give me anything else, Sakura. You've done enough."
Her pulse quickened. "But I want to! It's just... another little thing that I can't let you leave without." His head tilted to the side, blatant curiosity in his gaze. She could almost feel herself shrink beneath it. "What?"
He shook his head. "I'm just wondering what else it could be, you've already given me so much."
Her lips pressed into a thin line as she inhaled deeply to calm her nerves - it was now or never - and then her mouth popped open with a tiny sound as she leaned down to his level. "You have to close your eyes, though. It's a surprise."
He studied her face and her sparkling eyes and decided to go along with it. "Okay," he agreed with a sigh and closed his eye.
Her hands reached for his face, hovering near his cheeks. She was really going to do this, wasn't she? She couldn't very well back out now; he'd likely think her to be mad if she just poked him in the face and said 'just kidding!' She swallowed and then gripped the outer edge of his hitai-ate.
He stiffened and made a move to stop her, but then she said, "I just want to make sure you don't peek, don't worry."
He sounded a bit apprehensive as he spoke up. "Is this really necessary? I can be a good boy and not peek."
Her breath caught in her throat. His voice was low and sounded huskier to her ears than he probably intended. She blinked and shook her head. "Of course it is!"
His soft chuckle was almost a tease itself and she flicked the metal protector of his hitai-ate. "So mean, Sakura-chan."
"You're really making me second guess this gift," she murmured.
"Okay, I'll behave."
She found herself smiling as she looked at his covered eyes. Her heart began to speed, nearly galloping out of her chest as the moment drew near. She could feel that her palms were hot, and her fingers twitched as she reached for him - just like that very morning when she touched him as he slept. She was so close. "Do you remember what you promised me in the office this morning?"
Wondering why she was bringing that up all of a sudden, but dismissing it all the same, he replied. "Of course I do."
"I've always considered you a man of your word," she admitted just above a whisper before her fingers slipped his mask down and she rushed in for a kiss.
Her brow knit with anxiety and disbelief as their mouths met. She could feel him and his warmth, but it all felt so surreal. His lips were soft, the bottom one more plump than the top she found as she pressed a bit more firm against him. But he wasn't responding, he was as stiff as a board, and mortification began to seep into her. The thing she feared most was happening. Her mind was already coming up with excuses and apologies before she even began to draw away.
Not even the space of an inch existed between them before his hands caught her face and pulled her back in. Her eyes widened in surprise as his mouth claimed hers, as he matched her tenderness and then surpassed her in intensity. Her breath came quick, as if she couldn't gain enough oxygen, as the anxiety she felt before melted away into something else.
But then his lips - his sweet, intoxicating kiss - began to slow. Then as abruptly as he kissed her, he stopped and pulled back from her in his chair. Her lips tingled with electric warmth and she could feel that he was waiting on her, for something, anything. After he began kissing her all of her reasoning, her excuses, were forgotten and she said the only thing she had left.
"Keep your promise to me."