One thousand and then some - Backstage: Scene I - Truth or dare?

[yoru_no_hikaru]

Pairing: KinKi Kids
Other characters: SDK crew, 4U, MA, Nagase Tomoya, Imai Tsubasa… and others
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: Don’t own them, just love them. ^^
Setting: canon
Warning: Just a tad of angst, but nothing much
Multi-chapter

Notes: I'm terribly sorry for the late update. >< Things have been very busy around here. One of my friends needed support - well, actually two of them needed it. But now things are getting back in order. And so here's the new update. I hope you'll like it, although it's still angsty and there's no real progress. Well, it's only the second chapter, of course. ^^

Intro: After their little "encounter" KinKi try to deal with things - or suppress all thoughts of it. Surprisingly they find that the world changes in very interesting ways - and there's nothing you can do about it...



“Truth.”
“Mou,” Mori groaned out. “You’re always picking truth, that’s no fun,” he complained.
“You can’t force me to switch,” Tsuyoshi argued.
He had gathered a group of his friends at his house, something he did every once in a while to get some kind of interaction with people he didn’t get to see a lot. For that meeting, his intentions were to re-forge some of the bonds, but also to distract himself from his aggravated state of mind. Being alone at home didn’t exactly help when you were a pensive character to begin with. Their activities had a wide range, but playing stupid games like that wasn’t among his favorites. He still agreed to join the game, because it was actually good to hear some fucked up stories of other people.
“We should force you,” Mori mused. “How about this for a rule: You have to switch every three rounds.”
“Come on, now,” Yoko cut in, “don’t be a pain. Leave him alone.”

“Okay, then,” Tsubasa spoke up. “Let’s find something that’ll make you want to switch.”
“I don’t think you can scare me into a situation where I might possibly be forced to smooch you,” Tsuyoshi grinned.
Tsubasa glared at him. “I can only tell you that you’re missing out. I’d be the best you’ve ever had.”
Tsuyoshi laughed at that. “I seriously doubt that.”
“Oh, then there’s your challenge,” Mori grinned. “Who was your best kiss thus far?”
Tsuyoshi froze. “I…” he stuttered, “I’m switching. If you want me to so badly, I’ll choose a dare.”
“Oh, no, no, no,” Tsubasa teased. “No switching after the task is set.”
“But I’m not answering that question,” Tsuyoshi stated firmly, a deep frown on his face.
“Oh, come on, now,” Mori complained. “It’s just about a kiss. It’s not like we’re asking your best fuck, or anything. Really, if you keep being touchy like that, might as well drop out.”

“Well, if he doesn’t want to,” Shinji cut in, “then he’ll have to do the punishment task.”
“I’m not doing that either,” Tsuyoshi decided. “You know what? I’m out. It’s a stupid game anyway. And among this group. How old are you guys, anyway?”
“Hey, no need to get all bitchy,” Shinji frowned. “If you don’t want to that’s fine, but leave it to the rest of us.”
“Fine,” Tsuyoshi sighed, getting up. “I’ll order some food in.”
“While you’re at it, bring some more beer,” Tsubasa requested.
“Wait, I’ll help you,” Yoko announced, getting up and following his host.
“What do you think was that?” Mori asked in a hushed voice.
“No idea,” Shinji stated, shaking his head. “Let’s better leave it alone, though.”
The other nodded slowly, but they both still felt awkward about the situation.

The tension lifted, though, with the next round of beer. They had pizza and forgot about their game. In the end they were sitting on front of the TV watching an old Taiga until the early morning hours. One by one the guests were leaving until only Shinji stayed behind, helping Tsuyoshi with the cleaning.
“Do you still want to operate the dish washer?” Shinji asked, after putting the last glasses into the device.
“No, I’ll do that when I get up,” Tsuyoshi decided. “Wow, we really had one long session tonight, huh?”
“It was fun,” Shinji smiled.
“It was,” Tsuyoshi agreed. “Let’s do this again some time soon.”
“Happily,” the other nodded. Then he considered his friend. “Ne, Tsuyoshi…”
“Hm?”

Shinji bit his lip. It thought it might not be the best moment, but a question was burning on his tongue and he simply couldn’t keep it in.
“About our game earlier,” he began carefully, “why did you drop out?”
Tsuyoshi frowned at him. “As I said before, it’s a stupid game,” he popped out defensively.
“But you were playing willingly,” Shinji pressed the point, “before that one question.”
Tsuyoshi merely bit his lip.
The other man sighed. “Look, you don’t have to tell me,” he said sympathetically. “But I know you and I don’t want you to… get lost.”
“Get lost?” Tsuyoshi asked, brows going up.
“I recognize that look on your face,” Shinji told him. “I hate it. I couldn’t stand seeing it when we were together. It had a big part in our break-up.”

Tsuyoshi groaned. “If you want to go on about that, you can leave.”
“No, sorry,” Shinji waved him off. “I think we’ve discussed that fair enough.”
“Agreed.”
“It still affects me when I see you like this,” Shinji explained. “That look… of longing. The craving of something I could never give you.”
“Nobody can,” Tsuyoshi muttered.
“You know,” Shinji mused, crossing his arms, “have you ever considered that the stupid obsession that you have is making you think that? Look, I really don’t mean to cut into old wounds, but when looking at it rationally, you’re glorifying something you have never experienced.”
Tsuyoshi chuckled slightly at that. “You know,” he stated, “ironically we’re closing the circle to the game earlier now.”
Shinji blinked at him. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
“Never mind,” Tsuyoshi waved him off.

“Tsuyoshi,” the other said in an intense voice, “tell me what’s going on. Now.”
“You said I don’t have to,” Tsuyoshi reminded him.
“Yeah, well, I’ve changed my mind,” Shinji told him. “You’re acting weird. And you’re saying weird things. It’s creeping me out and I’m not leaving before I know what’s going on.”
“You know,” Tsuyoshi mused, considering the other man, “somehow I can’t help wondering why you don’t understand my feelings, seeing how you have similar difficulties with letting go.” Shinji blushed at that, clearing his throat. “But be that as it may,” Tsuyoshi continued. “The story actually started with you.”
“Huh?”

“Remember how you told me to finally get my act together with Koichi? That there was no good in dwelling and that I should finally put a stop to it all?”
“I remember that,” Shinji nodded.
“At first I was appalled by the idea,” Tsuyoshi told him. “But I kept thinking about what you had said and in the end I decided that you were right. I mean, for years going I’d done nothing and nothing changed. So I thought that it couldn’t get any worse, but it was possible that I could heal somehow.”
“So you talked to him?” Shinji asked, sounding surprised.
“I went to talk to him,” Tsuyoshi confirmed. “I met him at the theater the other day. It was the 1000th performance of his musical.”
“I saw that you went there.”

“I wanted to tell him everything. And… maybe steal a kiss,” Tsuyoshi admitted.
“Oh, Tsuyoshi. From him of all people,” the other man sighed.
“I know,” Tsuyoshi said apologetically. “It’s just… I thought it was the only chance I’ll ever get, so… I went for it.”
“And you got your kiss?” Shinji assumed. “And now you’re soaring on cloud number nine again.”
“It’s not like that,” the other opposed. “I mean, I did get my kiss. And more, actually. But it’s not like I’m under some kind of delusion that he would want me. It’s just still fresh and I’m… trying to deal. And I don’t think I’ll ever have something like that. For real.”
“That bastard,” Shinji cursed.

“Shinji-kun,” Tsuyoshi cut right in, “there’s no good.”
“He is a bastard,” the other insisted. “And a coward too. What - did he fuck you?!”
“No,” Tsuyoshi muttered, his face flushing with embarrassment. “I… I kind of… well, I blew him.”
“What - you serviced him and then he dropped you?”
“It’s not like that,” Tsuyoshi explained. “I am the one at fault. I… assaulted him, basically, even though I know that he won’t go there. He just… didn’t stop me. It’s not like I was expecting anything.”
Shinji merely scoffed. “That guy is so latently gay, it’s almost sickening.”
“You just want him to suck you,” Tsuyoshi stated. “That’s why you keep insisting that he’s gay. Maybe you’re thinking that if only you insist long enough in the end he will believe it.”

“I’m telling you,” Shinji insisted, “that guy is totally hot for dick.”
“Shinji, please,” Tsuyoshi urged the other, “let’s drop this. There is no point. I don’t mean to pressure him in any way. He knows I like him and if he’s up for it, all he has to do is knock on my door. I’m not counting on something like that to happen, though. Thus, I have decided to consider myself lucky to have been granted a kiss of the one I love. I will treasure it, but… I’ll try to move on. You were right, I’ve got to find someone who will… stand by my side.”
“So now you’re going for second best?”
“Aw,” Tsuyoshi sneered, “the pure soul alone should judge the lost. Don’t tell me you’ve never picked second best.”

Shinji put his hands up defensively. “Okay, okay, I’ll back off.”
“Thank you,” Tsuyoshi clicked his tongue.
“So… do you want sex?”
“Really?”
“So long as you don’t call me by his name,” Shinji shrugged. “we’re cool.”
“Shinji-kun, go home,” Tsuyoshi sighed. “It’s upsetting to see you stoop to such a level.”

“I meant it as some random fun,” the other told him, sounding hurt. “Don’t be so full of yourself.”
“In that case I… appreciate that you’re considering possibilities for my entertainment, but I have to inform you that I am not a host to have that kind of fun with. If you’re out for that, I’m afraid you’ll have to pay for it.”
“Have it your way,” Shinji shrugged.
Tsuyoshi gave him a weak smile. “Thank you for understanding. Ah, Shinji-kun…”
“Yes?”

“Please, keep this to yourself. You know, what I told you. And whatever you do, don’t go and talk to Koichi. I mean it, I don’t wish to make this an issue.”
“Fine,” Shinji agreed. “No talk to Koichi.”
“Thank you,” Tsuyoshi stated again.
“Whatever,” Shinji shrugged. “You know, you two are like made for each other. You both seem to enjoy suffering…”
With that he turned to leave the apartment.

______________________________________________________________________________________________________

“Dare,” Koichi dragged out without a lot of drive.
He really didn’t like that kind of game to begin with and they’d been doing it for a while and basically the good stuff had run out about half an hour ago. Sadly, since that meeting took place at Nishikawa’s place Koichi had no real say in what they should do - or who else would be around. He had been reluctant to go in the first place, but he couldn’t have made up yet another excuse after already avoiding five invitations. Koichi knew that Nishikawa was only trying to be nice and he tried to get social with the TV crew as best he could.

He would invite people in turns, unable to host all of them at the same time, but being attentive and spreading his attention well. For the time being he was just glad that he rarely ever invited him and Tsuyoshi at the same time. He seemed to be under the weird impression that they didn’t get along well. Nishikawa really had no sense for chemistry at all - seeing how Shinji was there, basically glaring at Koichi with cold eyes ever since they had settled down in the living room. Well, Nishikawa was not the only one to misinterpret his feelings about his partner. Koichi never bothered to explain his relation with Tsuyoshi to anyone. Whoever wanted to know anything about it could ask him. As for those who would not ask - they’d never understand it anyway, so why bother?

“Okay,” Shinji’s voice ripped Koichi out of his thoughts. The man gave him a sly grin, clapping his hands together. “I dare you to… give me a lap dance.” If he couldn’t confront the bastard, he’d definitely get to him as best he could.
Koichi rolled his eyes. “We agreed we wouldn’t get physical, remember?”
“Well, I call we grade up to adult,” Shinji suggested, “because there’s more potential.”
“If you’ve grown tired of what we’re doing, let’s drop it,” Koichi told him, “instead of changing the rules mid-game.”
“But really, Koichi,” Nishikawa argued, “we can do a lot of fun things.”

Takamizawa chuckled. “Koichi’s shy, you know that. He doesn’t like a lot of physical contact to begin with.”
“Thank you,” Koichi bit out at the taller man, “for once again pointing out my weaknesses in front of everybody.”
“It’s not a big deal,” Shinji shrugged. “It’s just a game.”
“I’m not doing it,” Koichi insisted.
“You’re such a child,” the other groaned out.
“Oh, stop whining just because I’m not touching your privates, fag,” Koichi shot out.
An uncomfortable silence spread in the room, the rest of the crew exchanging wary glances as they waited for Shinji’s reaction. And he definitely felt like flying at Koichi, grabbing him and shaking him like mad. But he knew, of course, that not only he’d get into serious trouble, but also that Tsuyoshi’s story would be revealed, which he had promised to keep secret. So he tried to keep his calm.

“You think I want it for my personal gain?” Shinji finally asked, tilting his head slightly. He grinned, trying hard to appear unaffected by Koichi’s offensive statement. “Oh dear, Koichi, quite full of yourself, aren’t you?” Koichi shifted uncomfortably as the other stared him down. “Let me assure you that if I had any real interest in you, I’d go about it very differently. As for the real thing… you’re so not my type.”
Koichi scoffed. “And that’s why you suggested to change our game when you could dare me?”
Shinji threw his arms up in desperation. “It’s a game that’s supposed to lure something out of you. That’s the point. It doesn’t matter to me, you can do it to Nishikawa, if you feel safer.”
“No, please, leave me out of this,” Nishikawa sighed.
“You’ll still get off on the visuals,” Koichi kept his argument.

“Want me to close my eyes?” Shinji suggested, his voice pressed. “But then I can still fantasize,” he warned sarcastically.
“Not that I could ever keep you from doing that,” Koichi shrugged.
“Well, there’s nothing wrong with fantasizing,” Shinji shrugged back. “And there’s nothing wrong with me being gay. Or having the hots for you - if I did.”
“You do,” Koichi accused him. “Liar,” he shouted out.
At that point Shinji simply burst. How dared that stupid maggot keep suggesting so boldly that he wanted him?! How could he use such abusive language when Shinji knew what he had done… well, let Tsuyoshi do just a few days back? No. Just no. No more.
“I’m still better than any idiot who’s in denial over their true feelings, covering them with sarcasm and offensive remarks,” he barked out.

Another silence filled the room. Even Shinji’s eyes grew slightly at his biting remark. All eyes went to Koichi, though, who had fisted his hands tightly, obviously trying to contain himself.
“If there’s something you want to say,” Koichi stated calmly, although his voice was notably shaking, “don’t hit around the bush and just say it.”
Shinji didn’t answer immediately, considering his options. However, before he could decide as to what he should do, Ken-san cut into the scene.
“That will be enough now,” he decided vigorously. “Calm down, everyone. This is supposed to be a game.”
Koichi took a deep breath, composing himself. “Right,” he muttered.
“Very well, then,” Shinji agreed, his body relaxing slightly. “I’m not gonna say anything else.”
“Thank you,” Takamizawa said with a strong nod.

“I’ll even let Koichi-kun revise on his choice,” Shinji offered. “How about it?” he addressed Koichi directly. “Want to switch to `Truth´?” He knew he should stop - that it would end in a catastrophe, but somehow he simply couldn’t hold the words back. They just kept coming, flowing from his mouth like an unstoppable wave. “Do you maybe have something you want to share? You enjoy gaming so much, after all, don’t you? Come on, then. Wanna tell everybody? What you did five days ago, backstage, after the show?”
People’s reactions to that outburst varied from confused to rather scared. Koichi merely stood there, body tense, but unmoving.
“Shinji-kun,” Takamizawa cut in as well. “Maybe you should go outside for a moment and really calm yourself.”
“No,” the other kept shouting. “I’m not willing to take it any longer.” He sneered at Koichi. “You know, you can call me a fag as much as you want. And you can pretend all you want too. Hide the truth, make excuses, call it by different names. But facts remain facts. And fact is you’re one egoistic bastard, who will claim as he pleases and then refuse to be held responsible for his actions. You’re really playing your games very well, Kou-chan. And I guess you’ll never grow the wiser as long as everyone plays along. Well, I’m not gonna.”

It was obvious that Shinji wasn’t finished talking. However, he was interrupted, because suddenly Koichi did move and quite strongly too. He dashed forward and, fist still clenched tightly, punched the other straight in the face, making him stumble backwards and almost hit the floor.
“Koichi!” Ken-san burst out, stepping in between the two men.
Koichi didn’t even seem to see him, though. He kept his eyes fixed on Shinji, who was still recovering from his blow. Koichi’s body still twitched nervously, as if preparing for another strike, but he kept his distance.

“You fucking bastard,” he screamed out. “You think you can fuck with me? Just because you like it up your ass doesn’t mean you can judge everybody else. Look at yourself. You’re just one sorry queer, who doesn’t get it enough, so you mess with other people’s business. Fuck you.”
That said Koichi turned on his heel and strode out of the room. Everybody stared after him, eyes wide.
“What on earth was that?” Nishikawa asked, still gawking.
Takamizawa crossed his arms, his body tense. He didn’t say anything, but his eyes went to find Ken-san, who looked utterly shocked. As his eyes found Takamizawa he sighed deeply.
“This is going to be bad…”

______________________________________________________________________________________________________

Okay, this is it for now. Oh dear, I really hate Koichi in this. ^^ Why did I design him in such a way? XD Well, there's going to be some development, of course. Although they hardly ever develop in a direction that I really want. ^^" Well, wait and see. :D

Stage: Act I