The J/B Smut Prompts, Holiday Edition: Part 5
Title: The J/B Smut Prompts, Holiday Edition: Part 5
Author: audreyii_fic
Fandom: Twilight (Team Jacob)
Rating: mostly M (for teh sex), but some K and T
Characters: Jacob/Bella
Genre: Romance/Humor, Romance/Angst, or just plain Romance
banner courtesy of sarahtomas
Summary:
Once again, TATSonians have been kind enough to provide me with some prompts of... uh... warming holiday cheer. Jacob and Bella get to spend their winter together in various positions formats. ( Click here for Part 1.) ( Click here for Part 2.) ( Click here for Part 3.) ( Click here for Part 4.)
The following comes with my standard disclaimer: These prompts have been written on the fly with next to no editing. Don't take any of it too seriously.
lilabut : Bella and Jake sneaking outside during Christmas Eve, escaping Charlie, Billy, etc. / willow2883 : Bella surprises Jake w/a X-mas present at midnight on X-mas Eve, but the surprise is on her when Jake comes home through the trees from patrolling - buck naked. / willow2883 : Doesn't really have anything to do with J & B, but I would find a New Year's Eve/Christmas Eve drunk Charlie & Billy amusing!
Crossing and uncrossing lines, Part 2 of 3.
[standard New Moon AU -- Cullens never come back. RomCom Fluff Gone Angst. NC-17.]
His body was heavy and hot on mine, the bare, dark skin of that muscled chest singeing the nerve endings of my belly and breasts. I was already gasping from the way he was sucking at my throat, and I flat-out whimpered when he moved one large hand down to cup the mound between my thighs. His fingers traced light, teasing circles against the soaked fabric; I squirmed under his touch, trying to get him to press harder, or faster, and to please for the love of God get my underwear out of the way.
His lips left my neck to brush along the sensitive shell of my ear. "You are thinking of me, aren't you, Bella?" he whispered, his fiery breath making me shiver. "You want me."
I nodded frantically, my fingernails digging into his back.
"Then say it." He tugged my panties to the side and then his fingers were wetly stroking, his touch sending waves of pleasure through my body even as his deft touch just barely avoided the places that throbbed with the most urgency. "Just say it, Bells, and you can have me."
"I want you." I moaned as I felt one long, thick digit slide inside me with shocking ease. "I want you, Jake, I want you, I love you, please--"
"Bella?"
I jerked awake with a gasp.
"Bella, I'm heading to work." Charlie's voice sounded tired through the door. "I left some toast and jelly out for you, okay?"
"Okay," I called, sitting up in bed. "Thanks."
I waited until I heard the front door close before I flopped back on the mattress with a groan, my heartbeat flying and my body aching.
This was getting ridiculous.
***
Jacob had been true to his word. Absolutely perfect. I wasn't sure if it was that he'd never really thought about the possibility of losing our friendship (the way I had obsessively), but not seeing me for two weeks had clearly hit him hard. He wasn't coming near any of the boundary lines -- no covert glances checking my reactions, no touches that lingered a moment too long. And it didn't feel forced or awkward, either. Jacob was being such a great friend in every way -- without the merest smidge of anything more than platonic in his demeanor -- that I was half convinced I'd imagined that things had ever been different. In other words, it was everything I'd been praying for for the last ten months.
And I couldn't stop picturing him naked.
It was wretched. Pathetic. I was acting like the worst stereotype of the indecisive woman: ignoring what was right in front of me, only to desperately want it the instant it was taken away. I felt like a cat meowing at a door and demanding to be on the other side no matter which side that was. My self-loathing was reaching Guinness Book of World Record heights. But none of that changed the fact that I was having to wear "fresh-scented" tampons all the time so that Jake wouldn't suspect how much he was turning me on just by being in the same room.
The genie was well and truly out of the bottle. I'd decided to look at Jacob that way, and once I'd started, I couldn't stop. The guards wouldn't go back up no matter how hard I tried -- and believe me, I was trying. I was trying not to look at the muscles on his arms as he shoveled snow off his front porch. I was trying not to smell his skin when he reached past me to steal a bite of whatever I was cooking. I was trying not to feel his heat when he propped his legs up on my lap while we watched dumb Christmas specials on network TV and ate popcorn. I was trying, I was... but I was failing. I couldn't ignore it anymore. My best friend was hot in every possible way.
It's because you're nineteen and never gone farther than a french kiss, I told myself. You're just horny. It doesn't change anything. Nothing is different; there's still no guarantee that things would work out between you if you went for it. You could lose the most important person in your life. And he's being your friend now, just like you asked. You've jerked him around enough. Think unsexy thoughts and wait. It'll go away. Don't do anything stupid, Bella.
Don't do anything stupid was the mantra of my life now.
***
"I give up."
"You've only been here ten minutes!"
"Well, yeah, but I still give up."
I grabbed Jacob's arm as he tried to head for the exit (and failed to ignore the flash of heat against my hand as I did). "I hate this place too, but we've still got to find Christmas gifts. How are we supposed to figure out what to get for people if we don't look around?"
"I'll make you a deal," Jacob said. He looked around the mall suspiciously as though he expected an attack at any moment. I wasn't quite so paranoid, but the horde of shoppers and the tinny speakers playing 'Winter Wonderland' were quickly getting on my nerves too. "I'll buy Rainier's for our dads if you bake something for the Pack. Cheap, easy, everyone will be happy, and we don't have to step foot inside Best Buy."
I frowned. "You're underage, you can't get beer."
Jacob flashed me a grin, and my ridiculous heart did a pitter-pat. Hopefully he couldn't hear it over the noise. "Wanna bet whether I'll be carded?"
Hmph. "Okay. But what about you? Don't you want something for Christmas?"
"Well..." Jacob glanced behind me. "How about that?" I turned around to see a very pretty, very leggy, very blonde girl sipping a coffee by the Starbucks. She was not-so-covertly looking in Jacob's direction.
When I turned back my cheeks were flaming and Jacob's grin had widened. "She looks cheap, so I can probably afford her," I said tartly. "But I don't think I have enough wrapping paper."
"You don't have to worry about wrapping. The less wrapped the better."
"Pig."
"Dog, actually."
"Whatever. Let's go." I stalked towards the door and out into the parking lot, feeling the cold wind bite through my heavy jacket. Hopefully it would calm my temper. Stupid blonde with her stupid legs.
"Well, that was a waste of gas," Jacob said as we got back into the truck. "Let's at least get something to eat before we go home."
"McDonald's or Wendy's?" Buying lunch for Jacob in a sit-down restaurant was a straight line to bankruptcy.
"Wendy's. Totally need a chocolate shake."
As we waited in the drive-thru, Jacob asked, "So, are you and Charlie coming over for Christmas Eve again?"
I blinked. "Huh?"
"Christmas Eve. Rachel's not coming back this year--" the look on Jacob's face turned bitter "-- she's too busy with something-or-other. So it'll just be you, me, Dad, and Charlie. I hope, anyway. If you two don't show it'll officially be depressing."
I was still confused. "Sure, but... what do you mean again?"
Now Jacob looked confused too. "You guys came over to our place last year, remember? And then we came over to your house on Christmas morning."
"Really?"
"Yeah, Bells. Our dads drank too much egg nog and insisted on watching that creepy stop-motion Rudolph movie and then started waxing poetic about 'back in the day.' Rachel texted most of the night. The Clearwaters stopped in for awhile and brought fish fry. Then we hung out in front of your flat screen the next day and watched football. You made vegetarian lasagna and no one could tell there was no meat." Jacob's eyebrows came together as he studied my face. "You don't remember any of this, do you."
I looked away quickly and pretended that steering wheel was very interesting. "I, uh... don't remember a lot of that time." Most of the last holiday season was a complete blank, actually; an entire Christmas wiped off the mental map. I fought down the urge to cry. "It sounds like it was fun, though."
"It was. I mean, you didn't talk much, but..." I heard Jacob swallow. "Well, it'll be fun this year, too. Maybe if we get Charlie and Billy drunk enough they'll tell us whether they wore sequins in the seventies."
My melancholy broke instantly as I giggled at that mental image. "Think there are pictures?"
"Could be. I'll get two cases of Rainier's."
"Sounds good." This was why Jacob Black was my best friend; he could make everything sunnier with just a few words. This was why nothing worth the smallest risk of losing him.
"Welcome to Wendy's, can I take your order?"
"I'll have a grilled chicken club, please, with a Diet Coke," I told the speaker box, "and..." I glanced over at Jacob. "What do you want?"
"Dunno." Then Jacob unbuckled his seat belt, scooted over next to me, and leaned across my body to get a better look at the menu board. The back of his neck was inches from my lips; he was practically in my lap.
Oh no.
Don't do anything stupid, I chanted to myself as Jake rattled off a list of requests. He smelled amazing. I remembered the feel of his mouth on my throat and how it had made me weak in the knees. If I ran my tongue along that russet skin, feeling his pulse, would he react the same way? Don't do anything stupid. Don't do anything stupid. Don't do anything stupid.
Thank God for fresh-scented tampons.
"Your total will be $35.94. Please drive around to the second window."
I gaped in shock as Jacob settled back on the opposite side of the cab. "What did you order?!"
He gave me a funny look. "Five cheeseburgers and a thing of boneless wings. Weren't you listening?"
"Oh. Uh, of course."
Don't do anything stupid.
***
A week later, with Christmas looming, I still couldn't figure out what to get Jacob. Especially since he hadn't actually answered my question. (Stupid leggy blonde.) I took a hot shower, hoping that that would help me think.
Okay. Something... neutral. Safe. Friendly. Something for his garage, maybe? I had no idea what kind of tools he needed, or what he might like; I still always grabbed the wrong wrench whenever he asked me to hand him something. Maybe Quil and Embry would know. Tools were friendly, right?
Or I could cook something. That was less friendly and more intimate, but he loved my cooking, and a little intimate had to be okay. He was my best friend, so we were intimate. We knew each other inside and out.
Well, not quite inside and out.
Jacob's body against mine, naked and soapy, hotter even than the near-scalding water that ran over my back. His slick, wet hands running up and down my sides, leaving gooseflesh in their wake even in the heat.
"You want me, don't you," he murmured against my skin. He was on his knees in front of me, his height bringing his head even with my chest. His lips teased, though, barely brushing, no matter how I dug my fingers into his hair and tried to guide him to where I wanted his tongue and teeth. "I'm the one you think about."
My knees were shaking. I was sure I would faint at any moment. "Uh-huh," I managed to say, water running down my face and onto his in huge wet drops.
"Then say it, Bells." His hands skirted down my hips and then around to my back, cupping my ass as he kissed his way down my ribcage, licking and nuzzling in turn. "All you have to do is say it and I'm yours."
"I think about you..." My words turned into a moan as Jake moved his head and latched onto my breast, his eyes closing as he suckled. I grabbed his broad shoulders just before I collapsed. "I think about you, I want you, I love you, please Jacob--"
I was jolted from my daydream as I started to shiver; the water was beginning to turn cold. I realized I'd been rubbing the washcloth between my legs for about two minutes straight and I threw it to the floor of the tub with a slap.
Pathetic.
***
As the days dragged on I noticed how often the word love was turning up in my little fantasies. But that didn't change anything, either.
Love definitely wasn't a guarantee.
***
Charlie and I got to the Blacks' around eight on Christmas Eve. I fidgeted nervously with the gift as I got out of the truck -- it had taken until December twenty-second but I'd finally thought of something safe and neutral -- only to have Billy tell me that Jacob was 'out running last-minute errands'.
Stupid Sam. He couldn't give the Pack Christmas Eve off? Seriously? Were vampires likely to attack in Santa suits?
The hours ticked by, but I had to admit, I wasn't bored. Jacob had just put a sticker bow on the Rainier's and shoved it under the coffee table (on top of which sat a twelve-inch fiber optic Christmas tree that flashed red and green, so technically the gift was wrapped and under the tree); being as it was out and obvious, Billy and Charlie had cracked open the case and started watching holiday television. It was everything Jacob had promised. I had to bite a pillow to keep from laughing as they sang along to Mr. Magoo's Christmas Carol at decibels that would have made the wolves howl in pain.
By eleven there was a significant dent in the first case of beer and still no sign of Jacob. "Where's your boy, Billy?" Charlie said, his words slurring just a hair. "Shouldn't he be home by now?"
Billy glanced at me. "Must be stuck on the roads."
Such a lame excuse wouldn't work on Charlie ninety-nine percent of the time, but the combination of Rainier's and Mr. Magoo seemed to have made him more gullible. "Okay. Well, we're gonna need to get going pretty soon." My father gave me a sheepish look. "You don't mind driving, Bells, right?"
"Yeah, that's fine." I glanced down at Jacob's gift under the coffee table. I didn't want him to open it in front of his dad. "Um... I'm just gonna go to the garage and leave this for Jake. I'll be right back."
I pulled on my boots and trudged across the front yard, the sounds of Billy and Charlie singing about razzleberry dressing echoing off-key in my ears.
The garage was freezing, of course. It was always warmer if Jacob was there, his body heat keeping the little space tolerable if not toasty, but when he was gone my breath misted in the icy air. I set the gift on top of his work bench where he couldn't possibly miss it, then turned around to go back into the house--
--when I saw Jacob coming out of the woods.
Buck naked.
Oh God oh God oh God.
I froze like a deer in the headlights. He didn't see me -- I was mostly blocked by the Rabbit -- but I could see him. The snow literally melted under his footsteps; the moonlight gleamed on his skin. And he was very, very, very naked. I could see everything, and I hoped to God the temperature wasn't, uh, affecting him, because if that was him cold then he had to be in record books or something, I knew next to nothing about relative sizes of... um... but still--
I was blushing so hard that I was sure I was breaking capillaries, but I couldn't look away as Jake came into the garage with a weary sigh. I hoped I was dreaming again or this was about to get incredibly awkward.
Then he saw me.
And he squeaked like a little girl.
Nope, not a dream.
"Jesus, Bella!" Jacob stepped to the other side of the Rabbit quickly, effectively hiding the parts of himself that I hadn't seen before. "What are you--"
"I was just dropping off your present," I explained quickly, my face still on fire. "I'm heading home, I didn't think I'd see you--"
"Well, you did."
"Yeah. Got that." I couldn't stop staring at his stomach, the way the muscles of his abdomen left little shadows under the bare bulb lighting the garage. He hadn't been shirtless in front of me very much recently. Part of the friends thing, no doubt. He was beautiful, he was unbelievably beautiful--
Don't do anything stupid.
"Uh, Bells?" Jacob's blush wasn't nearly as obvious as mine, given the relative difference in our skin tones, but it was there nonetheless. I was surprised to find him being shy about his body, but I supposed there was a difference between working on an engine in cut-off shorts and being unexpectedly caught in the nude by a girl. "You're between me and my clothes."
I glanced over my shoulder. Yeah, his pants and shirt were sitting on the stool. "Ah."
Jacob waited for a moment. When I didn't do anything, he raised his eyebrows. "If you're not going to toss them to me, will you at least look away?"
"Oh. Sure."
He waited again... then cleared his throat. "Uh, you know you're not actually looking away, right?"
"Um." I swallowed, still unable to tear my eyes from his skin. A terrible unsatisfied ache deep in my body was making it hard to think. "Yeah. I guess I'm not."
Silence.
Something in Jacob's expression was wavering, and I realized my feet were taking me around the hood of the Rabbit, walking me towards him without my having given them permission to do so. I felt like I was moving in slow motion.
Don't do anything stupid, my mind warned. Just don't. Everything has been okay; change it and you could lose him. This will be the biggest mistake of your life.
Want it, my body told me in much less eloquent language. Need it. Need him.
Jacob hadn't moved, not a single inch. His dark eyes followed me as I approached.
Don't, my mind said again, pleading this time. Don't. Don't. Do. Not.
My body just throbbed wordlessly.
I was standing in front of him now, only a few inches away. I was too shy to look up at his face or down at his nakedness, so I just focused on the juncture of his neck and shoulder, at the sharp outline of his clavicle. I heard him take a deep breath and make a little noise in the back of his throat; I'd forgotten to wear a tampon. It probably wouldn't have done enough anyway, not this time.
I hesitated, unable to make a decision.
"Bella," Jacob begged huskily, "you're asking too much--"
Of course I was.
I leaned forward and pressed my lips right to his collarbone.
Fine, my mind snapped. Don't say I didn't warn you.
Suddenly there were hot hands on my arms, spinning me around, and then my back was pressed against the driver's side door of the Rabbit as Jacob's body crashed into mine. "Shit," he groaned under his breath, frantically pulling at my coat, "shit shit shit goddamn it..."
I knew how he felt.
In a moment my coat and hoodie were on the concrete and Jacob's hands were under my shirt, palming and kneading; I was raking my fingernails across his chest and stomach like I'd been dreaming about for weeks. The cold of the air couldn't touch me; Jacob was too blazingly hot for that. And the hottest part of him was pressed to my bare stomach, rigid and heavy and insistent.
My mind went AWOL and my hormones took over as an entire month of erotic fantasies caught up with me. No more thinking things through. I reached down between us and stroked him, pushed him more firmly against my belly, felt his hips jerk as I did. He was silky smooth and iron hard at the same time and I loved the feel of him in my hand. "Fuck," he gasped, his forehead resting against the window. "Oh fuck Bella, this is--"
I didn't get a chance to find out what this was.
"Bella!"
I jerked my hands away from Jacob's body as I heard Charlie's voice call from the house.
"Bella, ready to go?"
Jacob growled and glared at the door, muttering something that sounded like "fucking cockblocker". He was panting heavily and so was I. Thank God it wasn't possible to see into the garage from the front porch...
"I... I have..." I nodded toward the door, but Jacob wasn't letting me go. He kept me pinned solidly against the Rabbit, his body flush against mine. I felt him as he kept pressing against my stomach with tiny instinctive movements. "Jake," I tried again (my mind starting to come back and a sudden rush of panic along with it), "please, I've got to--"
Jacob shoved his hand into my pants without warning and I had to choke back a cry as his fingers slid along my soaked underwear and slippery folds. "I knew you were lying," he whispered. "I did this, right?"
I drew in a ragged breath as my mind decided to speak up again. Good job. Way to ruin everything.
"Right, Bella?"
All I had to do was say it, but this wasn't a fantasy, it was real life, and something old and unformed and frightened was keeping the words stuck in my throat.
Won't be able to fix this one.
"Bella?" My father's voice was coming closer.
"I have to go, Jake," I pleaded.
Jacob pulled back, searching my expression. He didn't like what he saw. "Don't you dare, honey," he murmured, and I knew he wasn't talking about driving my father home. "Don't you dare. I won't play this game again."
My heart was flying, and I couldn't tell if it was from his words, his fingers, or the terror that was drowning out everything else.
He'll leave you, you know. Maybe not if you were just friends, but now...
I forced myself to swallow. "Jake, please."
He paused for a long moment, then reluctantly removed his hand. He bent over, grabbed my hoodie and coat off the floor, and handed them to me without a word.
I couldn't look at his face.
As I all but ran out of the garage, I heard him call, "I'll see you in the morning, Bells. Merry Christmas." There was something both sad and steely in his voice.
So much for not doing anything stupid.
To be concluded...
[A/N: I swear, I try to avoid the angst, it just follows me around...]
___
hefors : A sauna, snow to cool off in and the extended pack. / gypseian : Bella is spectacularly ill the week leading into New Year's and Jake spends the week taking care of her (in more than one way). / pnai_87 : Bella calls her mom (to wish her merry xmas or something) while Jacob "distracts" her.
Boys are jerks -- Bella's boy in particular.
[standard New Moon AU -- Cullens don't come back. set in the future. Total PWP. NC-17.]
"I'm not doing it," Bella said petulantly, crossing her arms. "I'm not."
Jacob was smart enough to keep his mouth shut, but Quil was not. "Oh, come on, Bella, don't be a wuss."
"I'm not being a wuss."
"We all did it--"
"You guys are a hundred and eight degrees! It's not the same!"
"I'm not," Emily piped up, a little smile on her face. "And I did it."
"Well, yeah," Bella sputtered, "but..."
"So go ahead. It won't kill you."
"It might!"
The entire pack (minus Leah, who thought they were idiots) was squeezed into Emily and Sam's Christmas/wedding/next-five-birthdays present to one another: an outdoor sauna. It was a perfectly decent size, but several werewolves and their girlfriends took up a lot of space. Bella was settled comfortably into Jacob's lap, a location from which she refused to move.
"It feels really good," Embry coaxed, grinning. "You'd be surprised."
"No."
"You realize we're all going to make fun of you forever if you don't, right?"
"You already make fun of me!"
"Yeah, but it could get worse," Jared piped up.
"Much worse," Quil added ominously.
"Loads worse."
"We'd bring it up every time we saw you."
"Forever."
"'Hey look, it's Bella The Chickenshit--'"
"That's enough, guys," Jacob said, glaring at the rest of the pack (but suppressing a smile as he did). "Leave my girl alone."
"Ooh, and now Jake's defending the wimp--" Paul dodged as Bella kicked at him, unbalancing on the slippery wood bench and nearly knocking Emily off of Sam's lap (which would have gotten him smacked).
Bella chewed on her lower lip and glanced up at Jacob. "Is it really so great?" she said under her breath (as though that would stop anyone from hearing). "'Cause it seems kind of stupid to me."
"It is kinda stupid, but yeah, it's fun. Switching from hot to cold to hot again... it's tingly. In the good way." Jacob's arms squeezed around Bella's waist, conveying clearly his approval of the 'good way' of tingly.
Bella hesitated another moment, then gingerly climbed off of Jake's legs. "All right. Just this once, though." They all watched as she took a deep breath, threw open the sauna door, and dove out into the snow with a squeal.
"Atta girl!"
"Way to go!"
"C'mon, Swan, you can do it!"
Less than thirty seconds later Bella was back in Jacob's lap, her pale skin mottled with red blotches. "Oh my God that was awful!"
Jacob laughed. "It's not that bad, honey. We all did it too."
"None of you are from Phoenix," she grumbled, teeth chattering.
***
"I hate you," Bella moaned, face down in bed. "I hate you, and Quil, and Embry, and every one of you stupid dogs."
Jacob winced, rubbing her back. "I'm sorry, Bells. What can I do?"
"You can jump off a cliff and die."
Everyone else had found the sauna-to-snow dive to be delightfully refreshing. Bella had wound up with a runny nose and a fever. It wasn't the best Christmas present ever.
"Other than committing ritual suicide, is there anything that will help? How about soup?"
"Don't want soup." (Bella wasn't a good patient.)
"More pillows?"
"No."
"Want me to get in and warm you up?"
"No. I hate you. Don't touch me." Bella said this as she scooted to the side, pulling back the comforter. Jacob kept a straight face as he climbed in and spooned his heated body to her feverish one. She relaxed into his embrace with a sigh.
"I really am sorry, honey," he said, kissing the top of her head. "I didn't think you'd get sick."
"Well, I did," she retorted petulantly. "I hate colds."
"I know." He rubbed his hands up and down her sides, pushing her tank top up so he could touch her skin directly. She didn't feel all that warm under his touch; she did have a fever, but she was mostly just in bad mood.
Bella stiffened as Jacob's hands inched a little higher under her shirt. "Stop that."
"It'll make you feel better."
"How will getting rocked around and exerting myself make me feel better?"
"I'll be gentle and I'll do all the work. All you have to do is lay there."
"Oh, that sounds like loads of fun."
"It will be." Jacob pressed a light kiss to the back of her neck, his hands moving higher. His thumbs came up to softly brush across her nipples and she bit back a moan. "You're stuck in bed anyway, right?"
"Yeah, but my nose is stuffy."
"You'll have forgotten all about it by the time I'm done."
"Oh, please. You are so arrogant."
"But justifiably so."
By this point Jacob had rolled Bella onto her back and was hovering over her, pressing soft little kisses to the hollow of her throat. Bella turned her head away. "I'm ignoring you," she said loftily.
"Mm-hmm. Well, you feel free to do that, Bells."
The phone rang on the bedside table. Bella gave Jacob a warning look (his expression remained bland and neutral) as she grabbed it off the hook. "Hello?"
"Hi, baby!"
"Hi, Mom." Bella pushed at Jacob's shoulder; he raised himself a little higher. "How are you?"
"I'm fine. You sound terrible! Are you sick?"
"Yeah, I've got a cold."
"Oh, no. How did that happen?"
Jacob scooted down the bed slightly, pushed Bella's tank top up over her breasts, and dropped his head down to the warm mounds before glancing up to gauge her reaction.
Bella's expression was murderous. Don't even think about it, she mouthed. "It's Jacob's fault," she said aloud into the phone. "Him and his stupid friends."
Jake smiled before biting lightly at one nipple, then licked away the small sting, his tongue moving slow and soft.
"How could it be Jake's fault? Colds happen, baby."
"He... um..." Bella's free hand grabbed at Jacob's hair, alternately tugging him away and pulling him closer. "He talked me into jumping into the snow with my bathing suit on..." She gave his head one particularly sharp yank and he released her breast, raising his eyebrows in mock-injury. "And I got chilled."
"I'm trying to warm you back up, honey," Jacob whispered, low enough that Renee wouldn't be able to hear him.
"That's not Jake's fault. Don't be too mad at him. Boys just do things like that."
"Fine, take his side," Bella grumbled. "You always do."
"I don't always take his side! I just happen to think he's a very nice boy--"
Jacob kissed his way down Bella's stomach...
"--who treats you really well--"
...then pulled her pajamas bottoms off with one swift movement...
"--is clearly crazy about you--"
...before pressing his mouth between her legs.
"--and is also as sweet as can be. So be nice to him."
"Sweet," Bella managed to say, fisting one hand into her hair. "Yeah. Right."
Jacob grinned. He used his fingers to spread her open, exposing more pink flesh, then went back to work. It only took a few moments before Bella's hips were rising to meet each long, slow lap of his tongue, a kitten licking cream from a bowl.
"He is, Bella! I've never met a sweeter kid. And he's always been so respectful of Phil and I whenever you two come to visit."
"It's an act." Bella gasped, then quickly disguised it as a cough. "He's evil and I hate him."
Jacob paused for a brief moment, then reached to hook one of Bella's legs over his shoulder before taking advantage of the new, wider position by diving his tongue inside her, making focused little thrusting movements that caused her to arch her back.
"Don't say things like that. If you two broke up it would break my heart."
"I'm... I'm not saying I'm going to break up with him." Another gasp-turned-cough. "Just that he's a huge jerk."
"All boys are jerks, baby, it's just the way they are."
Jacob glanced up at that -- of course he could hear everything Renee was saying -- and shrugged mildly. Bella glared at him. An instant later the tip of his tongue was tracing hard, focused circles around her clit, flicking firmly as two fingers pressed and stroked inside, making small wet noises as they moved.
"I think mine's the worst," Bella whimpered.
"Oh, baby, don't cry! Every girl thinks that her boyfriend is the worst. It's just not true."
"You'd be surprised..."
"There are lots of real jerks out there, Bella, there really are. You've got to hang onto the nice boys when you find them, and believe me, Jacob's a nice boy. A mother can tell."
The 'nice boy' pressed his burning mouth harder against Bella, pulling her clit into his mouth and sucking. Then he thrust a third long finger into her body.
Bella flung an arm over her face and bit down on her wrist as she convulsed.
"I'd just hate to see you make a mistake over something as silly as a cold, that's all I'm saying, baby. But of course I'm on your side. I'm always on your side, you know that, right? ...right?"
Jacob eased his way back up the bed, wiping his mouth with a smug grin.
"Bella? Are you there?"
"Yeah, Mom, sorry, I'm here." Bella's chest was heaving as she gulped for breath, but she still had the energy to smack Jacob in the chest with her free hand a few times. (He didn't react.) "You don't have to worry, okay? I love him. Lots. I'm not letting him go any time soon. But that doesn't change the fact that sometimes he's a stupid--" smack "--inconsiderate--" smack "--arrogant--" smack "--dog." Then she sneezed.
"That's what I've been telling you, baby. He's a boy."
Jacob just smirked.
[I'm on Twitter now, guys, @audreyii_fic. I have no idea how to use the fucking thing, but it's probably time to stop being a crotchety old woman about it. I'll probably post fic updates and fandom thoughts and shit like that. That's what people use Twitter for, right?]
Author: audreyii_fic
Fandom: Twilight (Team Jacob)
Rating: mostly M (for teh sex), but some K and T
Characters: Jacob/Bella
Genre: Romance/Humor, Romance/Angst, or just plain Romance
banner courtesy of sarahtomas
Summary:
Once again, TATSonians have been kind enough to provide me with some prompts of... uh... warming holiday cheer. Jacob and Bella get to spend their winter together in various positions formats. ( Click here for Part 1.) ( Click here for Part 2.) ( Click here for Part 3.) ( Click here for Part 4.)
The following comes with my standard disclaimer: These prompts have been written on the fly with next to no editing. Don't take any of it too seriously.
lilabut : Bella and Jake sneaking outside during Christmas Eve, escaping Charlie, Billy, etc. / willow2883 : Bella surprises Jake w/a X-mas present at midnight on X-mas Eve, but the surprise is on her when Jake comes home through the trees from patrolling - buck naked. / willow2883 : Doesn't really have anything to do with J & B, but I would find a New Year's Eve/Christmas Eve drunk Charlie & Billy amusing!
Crossing and uncrossing lines, Part 2 of 3.
[standard New Moon AU -- Cullens never come back. RomCom Fluff Gone Angst. NC-17.]
His body was heavy and hot on mine, the bare, dark skin of that muscled chest singeing the nerve endings of my belly and breasts. I was already gasping from the way he was sucking at my throat, and I flat-out whimpered when he moved one large hand down to cup the mound between my thighs. His fingers traced light, teasing circles against the soaked fabric; I squirmed under his touch, trying to get him to press harder, or faster, and to please for the love of God get my underwear out of the way.
His lips left my neck to brush along the sensitive shell of my ear. "You are thinking of me, aren't you, Bella?" he whispered, his fiery breath making me shiver. "You want me."
I nodded frantically, my fingernails digging into his back.
"Then say it." He tugged my panties to the side and then his fingers were wetly stroking, his touch sending waves of pleasure through my body even as his deft touch just barely avoided the places that throbbed with the most urgency. "Just say it, Bells, and you can have me."
"I want you." I moaned as I felt one long, thick digit slide inside me with shocking ease. "I want you, Jake, I want you, I love you, please--"
"Bella?"
I jerked awake with a gasp.
"Bella, I'm heading to work." Charlie's voice sounded tired through the door. "I left some toast and jelly out for you, okay?"
"Okay," I called, sitting up in bed. "Thanks."
I waited until I heard the front door close before I flopped back on the mattress with a groan, my heartbeat flying and my body aching.
This was getting ridiculous.
***
Jacob had been true to his word. Absolutely perfect. I wasn't sure if it was that he'd never really thought about the possibility of losing our friendship (the way I had obsessively), but not seeing me for two weeks had clearly hit him hard. He wasn't coming near any of the boundary lines -- no covert glances checking my reactions, no touches that lingered a moment too long. And it didn't feel forced or awkward, either. Jacob was being such a great friend in every way -- without the merest smidge of anything more than platonic in his demeanor -- that I was half convinced I'd imagined that things had ever been different. In other words, it was everything I'd been praying for for the last ten months.
And I couldn't stop picturing him naked.
It was wretched. Pathetic. I was acting like the worst stereotype of the indecisive woman: ignoring what was right in front of me, only to desperately want it the instant it was taken away. I felt like a cat meowing at a door and demanding to be on the other side no matter which side that was. My self-loathing was reaching Guinness Book of World Record heights. But none of that changed the fact that I was having to wear "fresh-scented" tampons all the time so that Jake wouldn't suspect how much he was turning me on just by being in the same room.
The genie was well and truly out of the bottle. I'd decided to look at Jacob that way, and once I'd started, I couldn't stop. The guards wouldn't go back up no matter how hard I tried -- and believe me, I was trying. I was trying not to look at the muscles on his arms as he shoveled snow off his front porch. I was trying not to smell his skin when he reached past me to steal a bite of whatever I was cooking. I was trying not to feel his heat when he propped his legs up on my lap while we watched dumb Christmas specials on network TV and ate popcorn. I was trying, I was... but I was failing. I couldn't ignore it anymore. My best friend was hot in every possible way.
It's because you're nineteen and never gone farther than a french kiss, I told myself. You're just horny. It doesn't change anything. Nothing is different; there's still no guarantee that things would work out between you if you went for it. You could lose the most important person in your life. And he's being your friend now, just like you asked. You've jerked him around enough. Think unsexy thoughts and wait. It'll go away. Don't do anything stupid, Bella.
Don't do anything stupid was the mantra of my life now.
***
"I give up."
"You've only been here ten minutes!"
"Well, yeah, but I still give up."
I grabbed Jacob's arm as he tried to head for the exit (and failed to ignore the flash of heat against my hand as I did). "I hate this place too, but we've still got to find Christmas gifts. How are we supposed to figure out what to get for people if we don't look around?"
"I'll make you a deal," Jacob said. He looked around the mall suspiciously as though he expected an attack at any moment. I wasn't quite so paranoid, but the horde of shoppers and the tinny speakers playing 'Winter Wonderland' were quickly getting on my nerves too. "I'll buy Rainier's for our dads if you bake something for the Pack. Cheap, easy, everyone will be happy, and we don't have to step foot inside Best Buy."
I frowned. "You're underage, you can't get beer."
Jacob flashed me a grin, and my ridiculous heart did a pitter-pat. Hopefully he couldn't hear it over the noise. "Wanna bet whether I'll be carded?"
Hmph. "Okay. But what about you? Don't you want something for Christmas?"
"Well..." Jacob glanced behind me. "How about that?" I turned around to see a very pretty, very leggy, very blonde girl sipping a coffee by the Starbucks. She was not-so-covertly looking in Jacob's direction.
When I turned back my cheeks were flaming and Jacob's grin had widened. "She looks cheap, so I can probably afford her," I said tartly. "But I don't think I have enough wrapping paper."
"You don't have to worry about wrapping. The less wrapped the better."
"Pig."
"Dog, actually."
"Whatever. Let's go." I stalked towards the door and out into the parking lot, feeling the cold wind bite through my heavy jacket. Hopefully it would calm my temper. Stupid blonde with her stupid legs.
"Well, that was a waste of gas," Jacob said as we got back into the truck. "Let's at least get something to eat before we go home."
"McDonald's or Wendy's?" Buying lunch for Jacob in a sit-down restaurant was a straight line to bankruptcy.
"Wendy's. Totally need a chocolate shake."
As we waited in the drive-thru, Jacob asked, "So, are you and Charlie coming over for Christmas Eve again?"
I blinked. "Huh?"
"Christmas Eve. Rachel's not coming back this year--" the look on Jacob's face turned bitter "-- she's too busy with something-or-other. So it'll just be you, me, Dad, and Charlie. I hope, anyway. If you two don't show it'll officially be depressing."
I was still confused. "Sure, but... what do you mean again?"
Now Jacob looked confused too. "You guys came over to our place last year, remember? And then we came over to your house on Christmas morning."
"Really?"
"Yeah, Bells. Our dads drank too much egg nog and insisted on watching that creepy stop-motion Rudolph movie and then started waxing poetic about 'back in the day.' Rachel texted most of the night. The Clearwaters stopped in for awhile and brought fish fry. Then we hung out in front of your flat screen the next day and watched football. You made vegetarian lasagna and no one could tell there was no meat." Jacob's eyebrows came together as he studied my face. "You don't remember any of this, do you."
I looked away quickly and pretended that steering wheel was very interesting. "I, uh... don't remember a lot of that time." Most of the last holiday season was a complete blank, actually; an entire Christmas wiped off the mental map. I fought down the urge to cry. "It sounds like it was fun, though."
"It was. I mean, you didn't talk much, but..." I heard Jacob swallow. "Well, it'll be fun this year, too. Maybe if we get Charlie and Billy drunk enough they'll tell us whether they wore sequins in the seventies."
My melancholy broke instantly as I giggled at that mental image. "Think there are pictures?"
"Could be. I'll get two cases of Rainier's."
"Sounds good." This was why Jacob Black was my best friend; he could make everything sunnier with just a few words. This was why nothing worth the smallest risk of losing him.
"Welcome to Wendy's, can I take your order?"
"I'll have a grilled chicken club, please, with a Diet Coke," I told the speaker box, "and..." I glanced over at Jacob. "What do you want?"
"Dunno." Then Jacob unbuckled his seat belt, scooted over next to me, and leaned across my body to get a better look at the menu board. The back of his neck was inches from my lips; he was practically in my lap.
Oh no.
Don't do anything stupid, I chanted to myself as Jake rattled off a list of requests. He smelled amazing. I remembered the feel of his mouth on my throat and how it had made me weak in the knees. If I ran my tongue along that russet skin, feeling his pulse, would he react the same way? Don't do anything stupid. Don't do anything stupid. Don't do anything stupid.
Thank God for fresh-scented tampons.
"Your total will be $35.94. Please drive around to the second window."
I gaped in shock as Jacob settled back on the opposite side of the cab. "What did you order?!"
He gave me a funny look. "Five cheeseburgers and a thing of boneless wings. Weren't you listening?"
"Oh. Uh, of course."
Don't do anything stupid.
***
A week later, with Christmas looming, I still couldn't figure out what to get Jacob. Especially since he hadn't actually answered my question. (Stupid leggy blonde.) I took a hot shower, hoping that that would help me think.
Okay. Something... neutral. Safe. Friendly. Something for his garage, maybe? I had no idea what kind of tools he needed, or what he might like; I still always grabbed the wrong wrench whenever he asked me to hand him something. Maybe Quil and Embry would know. Tools were friendly, right?
Or I could cook something. That was less friendly and more intimate, but he loved my cooking, and a little intimate had to be okay. He was my best friend, so we were intimate. We knew each other inside and out.
Well, not quite inside and out.
Jacob's body against mine, naked and soapy, hotter even than the near-scalding water that ran over my back. His slick, wet hands running up and down my sides, leaving gooseflesh in their wake even in the heat.
"You want me, don't you," he murmured against my skin. He was on his knees in front of me, his height bringing his head even with my chest. His lips teased, though, barely brushing, no matter how I dug my fingers into his hair and tried to guide him to where I wanted his tongue and teeth. "I'm the one you think about."
My knees were shaking. I was sure I would faint at any moment. "Uh-huh," I managed to say, water running down my face and onto his in huge wet drops.
"Then say it, Bells." His hands skirted down my hips and then around to my back, cupping my ass as he kissed his way down my ribcage, licking and nuzzling in turn. "All you have to do is say it and I'm yours."
"I think about you..." My words turned into a moan as Jake moved his head and latched onto my breast, his eyes closing as he suckled. I grabbed his broad shoulders just before I collapsed. "I think about you, I want you, I love you, please Jacob--"
I was jolted from my daydream as I started to shiver; the water was beginning to turn cold. I realized I'd been rubbing the washcloth between my legs for about two minutes straight and I threw it to the floor of the tub with a slap.
Pathetic.
***
As the days dragged on I noticed how often the word love was turning up in my little fantasies. But that didn't change anything, either.
Love definitely wasn't a guarantee.
***
Charlie and I got to the Blacks' around eight on Christmas Eve. I fidgeted nervously with the gift as I got out of the truck -- it had taken until December twenty-second but I'd finally thought of something safe and neutral -- only to have Billy tell me that Jacob was 'out running last-minute errands'.
Stupid Sam. He couldn't give the Pack Christmas Eve off? Seriously? Were vampires likely to attack in Santa suits?
The hours ticked by, but I had to admit, I wasn't bored. Jacob had just put a sticker bow on the Rainier's and shoved it under the coffee table (on top of which sat a twelve-inch fiber optic Christmas tree that flashed red and green, so technically the gift was wrapped and under the tree); being as it was out and obvious, Billy and Charlie had cracked open the case and started watching holiday television. It was everything Jacob had promised. I had to bite a pillow to keep from laughing as they sang along to Mr. Magoo's Christmas Carol at decibels that would have made the wolves howl in pain.
By eleven there was a significant dent in the first case of beer and still no sign of Jacob. "Where's your boy, Billy?" Charlie said, his words slurring just a hair. "Shouldn't he be home by now?"
Billy glanced at me. "Must be stuck on the roads."
Such a lame excuse wouldn't work on Charlie ninety-nine percent of the time, but the combination of Rainier's and Mr. Magoo seemed to have made him more gullible. "Okay. Well, we're gonna need to get going pretty soon." My father gave me a sheepish look. "You don't mind driving, Bells, right?"
"Yeah, that's fine." I glanced down at Jacob's gift under the coffee table. I didn't want him to open it in front of his dad. "Um... I'm just gonna go to the garage and leave this for Jake. I'll be right back."
I pulled on my boots and trudged across the front yard, the sounds of Billy and Charlie singing about razzleberry dressing echoing off-key in my ears.
The garage was freezing, of course. It was always warmer if Jacob was there, his body heat keeping the little space tolerable if not toasty, but when he was gone my breath misted in the icy air. I set the gift on top of his work bench where he couldn't possibly miss it, then turned around to go back into the house--
--when I saw Jacob coming out of the woods.
Buck naked.
Oh God oh God oh God.
I froze like a deer in the headlights. He didn't see me -- I was mostly blocked by the Rabbit -- but I could see him. The snow literally melted under his footsteps; the moonlight gleamed on his skin. And he was very, very, very naked. I could see everything, and I hoped to God the temperature wasn't, uh, affecting him, because if that was him cold then he had to be in record books or something, I knew next to nothing about relative sizes of... um... but still--
I was blushing so hard that I was sure I was breaking capillaries, but I couldn't look away as Jake came into the garage with a weary sigh. I hoped I was dreaming again or this was about to get incredibly awkward.
Then he saw me.
And he squeaked like a little girl.
Nope, not a dream.
"Jesus, Bella!" Jacob stepped to the other side of the Rabbit quickly, effectively hiding the parts of himself that I hadn't seen before. "What are you--"
"I was just dropping off your present," I explained quickly, my face still on fire. "I'm heading home, I didn't think I'd see you--"
"Well, you did."
"Yeah. Got that." I couldn't stop staring at his stomach, the way the muscles of his abdomen left little shadows under the bare bulb lighting the garage. He hadn't been shirtless in front of me very much recently. Part of the friends thing, no doubt. He was beautiful, he was unbelievably beautiful--
Don't do anything stupid.
"Uh, Bells?" Jacob's blush wasn't nearly as obvious as mine, given the relative difference in our skin tones, but it was there nonetheless. I was surprised to find him being shy about his body, but I supposed there was a difference between working on an engine in cut-off shorts and being unexpectedly caught in the nude by a girl. "You're between me and my clothes."
I glanced over my shoulder. Yeah, his pants and shirt were sitting on the stool. "Ah."
Jacob waited for a moment. When I didn't do anything, he raised his eyebrows. "If you're not going to toss them to me, will you at least look away?"
"Oh. Sure."
He waited again... then cleared his throat. "Uh, you know you're not actually looking away, right?"
"Um." I swallowed, still unable to tear my eyes from his skin. A terrible unsatisfied ache deep in my body was making it hard to think. "Yeah. I guess I'm not."
Silence.
Something in Jacob's expression was wavering, and I realized my feet were taking me around the hood of the Rabbit, walking me towards him without my having given them permission to do so. I felt like I was moving in slow motion.
Don't do anything stupid, my mind warned. Just don't. Everything has been okay; change it and you could lose him. This will be the biggest mistake of your life.
Want it, my body told me in much less eloquent language. Need it. Need him.
Jacob hadn't moved, not a single inch. His dark eyes followed me as I approached.
Don't, my mind said again, pleading this time. Don't. Don't. Do. Not.
My body just throbbed wordlessly.
I was standing in front of him now, only a few inches away. I was too shy to look up at his face or down at his nakedness, so I just focused on the juncture of his neck and shoulder, at the sharp outline of his clavicle. I heard him take a deep breath and make a little noise in the back of his throat; I'd forgotten to wear a tampon. It probably wouldn't have done enough anyway, not this time.
I hesitated, unable to make a decision.
"Bella," Jacob begged huskily, "you're asking too much--"
Of course I was.
I leaned forward and pressed my lips right to his collarbone.
Fine, my mind snapped. Don't say I didn't warn you.
Suddenly there were hot hands on my arms, spinning me around, and then my back was pressed against the driver's side door of the Rabbit as Jacob's body crashed into mine. "Shit," he groaned under his breath, frantically pulling at my coat, "shit shit shit goddamn it..."
I knew how he felt.
In a moment my coat and hoodie were on the concrete and Jacob's hands were under my shirt, palming and kneading; I was raking my fingernails across his chest and stomach like I'd been dreaming about for weeks. The cold of the air couldn't touch me; Jacob was too blazingly hot for that. And the hottest part of him was pressed to my bare stomach, rigid and heavy and insistent.
My mind went AWOL and my hormones took over as an entire month of erotic fantasies caught up with me. No more thinking things through. I reached down between us and stroked him, pushed him more firmly against my belly, felt his hips jerk as I did. He was silky smooth and iron hard at the same time and I loved the feel of him in my hand. "Fuck," he gasped, his forehead resting against the window. "Oh fuck Bella, this is--"
I didn't get a chance to find out what this was.
"Bella!"
I jerked my hands away from Jacob's body as I heard Charlie's voice call from the house.
"Bella, ready to go?"
Jacob growled and glared at the door, muttering something that sounded like "fucking cockblocker". He was panting heavily and so was I. Thank God it wasn't possible to see into the garage from the front porch...
"I... I have..." I nodded toward the door, but Jacob wasn't letting me go. He kept me pinned solidly against the Rabbit, his body flush against mine. I felt him as he kept pressing against my stomach with tiny instinctive movements. "Jake," I tried again (my mind starting to come back and a sudden rush of panic along with it), "please, I've got to--"
Jacob shoved his hand into my pants without warning and I had to choke back a cry as his fingers slid along my soaked underwear and slippery folds. "I knew you were lying," he whispered. "I did this, right?"
I drew in a ragged breath as my mind decided to speak up again. Good job. Way to ruin everything.
"Right, Bella?"
All I had to do was say it, but this wasn't a fantasy, it was real life, and something old and unformed and frightened was keeping the words stuck in my throat.
Won't be able to fix this one.
"Bella?" My father's voice was coming closer.
"I have to go, Jake," I pleaded.
Jacob pulled back, searching my expression. He didn't like what he saw. "Don't you dare, honey," he murmured, and I knew he wasn't talking about driving my father home. "Don't you dare. I won't play this game again."
My heart was flying, and I couldn't tell if it was from his words, his fingers, or the terror that was drowning out everything else.
He'll leave you, you know. Maybe not if you were just friends, but now...
I forced myself to swallow. "Jake, please."
He paused for a long moment, then reluctantly removed his hand. He bent over, grabbed my hoodie and coat off the floor, and handed them to me without a word.
I couldn't look at his face.
As I all but ran out of the garage, I heard him call, "I'll see you in the morning, Bells. Merry Christmas." There was something both sad and steely in his voice.
So much for not doing anything stupid.
To be concluded...
[A/N: I swear, I try to avoid the angst, it just follows me around...]
___
hefors : A sauna, snow to cool off in and the extended pack. / gypseian : Bella is spectacularly ill the week leading into New Year's and Jake spends the week taking care of her (in more than one way). / pnai_87 : Bella calls her mom (to wish her merry xmas or something) while Jacob "distracts" her.
Boys are jerks -- Bella's boy in particular.
[standard New Moon AU -- Cullens don't come back. set in the future. Total PWP. NC-17.]
"I'm not doing it," Bella said petulantly, crossing her arms. "I'm not."
Jacob was smart enough to keep his mouth shut, but Quil was not. "Oh, come on, Bella, don't be a wuss."
"I'm not being a wuss."
"We all did it--"
"You guys are a hundred and eight degrees! It's not the same!"
"I'm not," Emily piped up, a little smile on her face. "And I did it."
"Well, yeah," Bella sputtered, "but..."
"So go ahead. It won't kill you."
"It might!"
The entire pack (minus Leah, who thought they were idiots) was squeezed into Emily and Sam's Christmas/wedding/next-five-birthdays present to one another: an outdoor sauna. It was a perfectly decent size, but several werewolves and their girlfriends took up a lot of space. Bella was settled comfortably into Jacob's lap, a location from which she refused to move.
"It feels really good," Embry coaxed, grinning. "You'd be surprised."
"No."
"You realize we're all going to make fun of you forever if you don't, right?"
"You already make fun of me!"
"Yeah, but it could get worse," Jared piped up.
"Much worse," Quil added ominously.
"Loads worse."
"We'd bring it up every time we saw you."
"Forever."
"'Hey look, it's Bella The Chickenshit--'"
"That's enough, guys," Jacob said, glaring at the rest of the pack (but suppressing a smile as he did). "Leave my girl alone."
"Ooh, and now Jake's defending the wimp--" Paul dodged as Bella kicked at him, unbalancing on the slippery wood bench and nearly knocking Emily off of Sam's lap (which would have gotten him smacked).
Bella chewed on her lower lip and glanced up at Jacob. "Is it really so great?" she said under her breath (as though that would stop anyone from hearing). "'Cause it seems kind of stupid to me."
"It is kinda stupid, but yeah, it's fun. Switching from hot to cold to hot again... it's tingly. In the good way." Jacob's arms squeezed around Bella's waist, conveying clearly his approval of the 'good way' of tingly.
Bella hesitated another moment, then gingerly climbed off of Jake's legs. "All right. Just this once, though." They all watched as she took a deep breath, threw open the sauna door, and dove out into the snow with a squeal.
"Atta girl!"
"Way to go!"
"C'mon, Swan, you can do it!"
Less than thirty seconds later Bella was back in Jacob's lap, her pale skin mottled with red blotches. "Oh my God that was awful!"
Jacob laughed. "It's not that bad, honey. We all did it too."
"None of you are from Phoenix," she grumbled, teeth chattering.
***
"I hate you," Bella moaned, face down in bed. "I hate you, and Quil, and Embry, and every one of you stupid dogs."
Jacob winced, rubbing her back. "I'm sorry, Bells. What can I do?"
"You can jump off a cliff and die."
Everyone else had found the sauna-to-snow dive to be delightfully refreshing. Bella had wound up with a runny nose and a fever. It wasn't the best Christmas present ever.
"Other than committing ritual suicide, is there anything that will help? How about soup?"
"Don't want soup." (Bella wasn't a good patient.)
"More pillows?"
"No."
"Want me to get in and warm you up?"
"No. I hate you. Don't touch me." Bella said this as she scooted to the side, pulling back the comforter. Jacob kept a straight face as he climbed in and spooned his heated body to her feverish one. She relaxed into his embrace with a sigh.
"I really am sorry, honey," he said, kissing the top of her head. "I didn't think you'd get sick."
"Well, I did," she retorted petulantly. "I hate colds."
"I know." He rubbed his hands up and down her sides, pushing her tank top up so he could touch her skin directly. She didn't feel all that warm under his touch; she did have a fever, but she was mostly just in bad mood.
Bella stiffened as Jacob's hands inched a little higher under her shirt. "Stop that."
"It'll make you feel better."
"How will getting rocked around and exerting myself make me feel better?"
"I'll be gentle and I'll do all the work. All you have to do is lay there."
"Oh, that sounds like loads of fun."
"It will be." Jacob pressed a light kiss to the back of her neck, his hands moving higher. His thumbs came up to softly brush across her nipples and she bit back a moan. "You're stuck in bed anyway, right?"
"Yeah, but my nose is stuffy."
"You'll have forgotten all about it by the time I'm done."
"Oh, please. You are so arrogant."
"But justifiably so."
By this point Jacob had rolled Bella onto her back and was hovering over her, pressing soft little kisses to the hollow of her throat. Bella turned her head away. "I'm ignoring you," she said loftily.
"Mm-hmm. Well, you feel free to do that, Bells."
The phone rang on the bedside table. Bella gave Jacob a warning look (his expression remained bland and neutral) as she grabbed it off the hook. "Hello?"
"Hi, baby!"
"Hi, Mom." Bella pushed at Jacob's shoulder; he raised himself a little higher. "How are you?"
"I'm fine. You sound terrible! Are you sick?"
"Yeah, I've got a cold."
"Oh, no. How did that happen?"
Jacob scooted down the bed slightly, pushed Bella's tank top up over her breasts, and dropped his head down to the warm mounds before glancing up to gauge her reaction.
Bella's expression was murderous. Don't even think about it, she mouthed. "It's Jacob's fault," she said aloud into the phone. "Him and his stupid friends."
Jake smiled before biting lightly at one nipple, then licked away the small sting, his tongue moving slow and soft.
"How could it be Jake's fault? Colds happen, baby."
"He... um..." Bella's free hand grabbed at Jacob's hair, alternately tugging him away and pulling him closer. "He talked me into jumping into the snow with my bathing suit on..." She gave his head one particularly sharp yank and he released her breast, raising his eyebrows in mock-injury. "And I got chilled."
"I'm trying to warm you back up, honey," Jacob whispered, low enough that Renee wouldn't be able to hear him.
"That's not Jake's fault. Don't be too mad at him. Boys just do things like that."
"Fine, take his side," Bella grumbled. "You always do."
"I don't always take his side! I just happen to think he's a very nice boy--"
Jacob kissed his way down Bella's stomach...
"--who treats you really well--"
...then pulled her pajamas bottoms off with one swift movement...
"--is clearly crazy about you--"
...before pressing his mouth between her legs.
"--and is also as sweet as can be. So be nice to him."
"Sweet," Bella managed to say, fisting one hand into her hair. "Yeah. Right."
Jacob grinned. He used his fingers to spread her open, exposing more pink flesh, then went back to work. It only took a few moments before Bella's hips were rising to meet each long, slow lap of his tongue, a kitten licking cream from a bowl.
"He is, Bella! I've never met a sweeter kid. And he's always been so respectful of Phil and I whenever you two come to visit."
"It's an act." Bella gasped, then quickly disguised it as a cough. "He's evil and I hate him."
Jacob paused for a brief moment, then reached to hook one of Bella's legs over his shoulder before taking advantage of the new, wider position by diving his tongue inside her, making focused little thrusting movements that caused her to arch her back.
"Don't say things like that. If you two broke up it would break my heart."
"I'm... I'm not saying I'm going to break up with him." Another gasp-turned-cough. "Just that he's a huge jerk."
"All boys are jerks, baby, it's just the way they are."
Jacob glanced up at that -- of course he could hear everything Renee was saying -- and shrugged mildly. Bella glared at him. An instant later the tip of his tongue was tracing hard, focused circles around her clit, flicking firmly as two fingers pressed and stroked inside, making small wet noises as they moved.
"I think mine's the worst," Bella whimpered.
"Oh, baby, don't cry! Every girl thinks that her boyfriend is the worst. It's just not true."
"You'd be surprised..."
"There are lots of real jerks out there, Bella, there really are. You've got to hang onto the nice boys when you find them, and believe me, Jacob's a nice boy. A mother can tell."
The 'nice boy' pressed his burning mouth harder against Bella, pulling her clit into his mouth and sucking. Then he thrust a third long finger into her body.
Bella flung an arm over her face and bit down on her wrist as she convulsed.
"I'd just hate to see you make a mistake over something as silly as a cold, that's all I'm saying, baby. But of course I'm on your side. I'm always on your side, you know that, right? ...right?"
Jacob eased his way back up the bed, wiping his mouth with a smug grin.
"Bella? Are you there?"
"Yeah, Mom, sorry, I'm here." Bella's chest was heaving as she gulped for breath, but she still had the energy to smack Jacob in the chest with her free hand a few times. (He didn't react.) "You don't have to worry, okay? I love him. Lots. I'm not letting him go any time soon. But that doesn't change the fact that sometimes he's a stupid--" smack "--inconsiderate--" smack "--arrogant--" smack "--dog." Then she sneezed.
"That's what I've been telling you, baby. He's a boy."
Jacob just smirked.
[I'm on Twitter now, guys, @audreyii_fic. I have no idea how to use the fucking thing, but it's probably time to stop being a crotchety old woman about it. I'll probably post fic updates and fandom thoughts and shit like that. That's what people use Twitter for, right?]