Tantruming 17-month-old

[carbonatedsass]

Maybe it's the heat or teething or just a plain bad mood or something, but my 17-month-old has been throwing quite a few tantrums lately, often because she wants something she can't have. Other times, the cause is simply a mystery to us

Comments

[jespere]

Sit close to her on the floor. Be there, be available. Make sure she can't hurt herself - and then let her ride it out.

Sometimes distraction works, but when they're in a full blown tantrum like that? Just be there. That's all you can, and have to do.

Good luck!

Ack, sorry for the "him". I'm obviously preoccupied, LOL!

[_holycrap_]

i'm probably gonna get flamed on this community, but i have a very spirited 20 month old and i've never been able to hold her in the last year or so during a tantrum because she's strong and she'll throw herself out of our arms. I've found that if I ignore her she quits in a minute or two and if you talk to her/try to touch her at all to comfort her she gets more and more upset and it can last 30 minutes or more.

So...I would recommend ignoring her. Seriously, don't talk to her or make eye contact until she stops. She wants attention and is doing it the wrong way...they learn real quick that they get loved on when they don't scream.

[skurviee]

That sounds just like my son. I have never ever been able to hold him when he is that upset without making him even more upset.
Even offering him the boob doesn't work when he is that upset. So I tell him that we can talk when he is done and I let him have his moment. When he realizes that I am not going to sit there with him when he is acting like that he stops and comes over for a hug. Sometimes he will cry a little bit more before coming over, but it ends much faster if I just let him be.

[curbbrat]

this. ignoring extinguishes tantruming behavior rapidly. we stay present and available in the room, but we don't indulge this attention grabbing technique. children need to learn how to work through their emotions and express their needs in positive ways. giving attention to tantrums reinforces, for the child, it as an effective and worse yet an appropriate means of displaying their needs.

tantrums around here are short lived and very infrequent. they always involve wanting what can not be had. we try to keep the no no items out of reach, sight and thus hopefully mind, but none-the-less toddlers are ambitious little people who will get into everything.

[asimplelife]

Agreed. My daughter is 17 months as well and if she throws a tantrum related to not getting her way I just say, "Well when you are done, you come to mommy and get a hug, ok?" She knows what a hug is so I just then walk away to the other side of the room (where she can still see me) and ignore her. She quits almost instantly to come over and get a hug.

If the tantrum is related to frustration I usually try and show her how to do it. For example she is really big on putting the caps on bottles. Sometimes she gets frustrated when it slips so I will go over and hold the bottle for her so that she can put the cap on.

[mydwelling]

In your case, I'd ignore her. That's what seems to work.

[valancystirling]

My son is doing the exact same right now. I keep thinking, isn't it early for this

[itsjustababy]

Do what works for your child. If ignoring her works, do that.

I would try saying, "I'm going to be just over there, doing XYZ. When you're finished I'll be there. You can come find me and we'll read a boo." and walk away.