A baby. They have a baby. Over there. With Snape. My god.
Sirius snapped out of his daze as Remus headed for the door. “Oh no you don’t.” He dashed into the kitchen, grabbed the first bottle he saw, and ran after Remus. “I know where you’re going and I’m coming. As much as I don’t want to, I’m coming. I don’t trust you to adequately scold them and save whatever poor kid they’ve abducted.” Surely, some mother was just realizing that her baby carriage was empty and suspecting that greasy, big-nosed man that had been lurking about earlier. No one would actually let them have a child.
Remus gaped. "Sirius, is that a gift of good will? Are you playing nice for once in your long, grudge-ridden life?" Despite the horrors that had abounded in recent hours, Remus could not help but grin. "I think I think I could use some back-up, actually. If we get lucky, it won't be too late to send the poor little bugger back." Remus might not especially like children, especially the sort too small to know not to drool on books, but he wanted to be sure that Harry and Severus had found some way to put it to sleep without resorting to Sirius's methods. "Don't you dare say that to Severus's face. I will kill you, I really will. We have to convince them that they really aren't fit parents without alienating them." He held the door open for Sirius.
“Oh, yes. I’m sure Harry and Snape need alcohol more than I do right now.” With a laugh that was almost hysterical, he tugged the cork out of the bottle. “We’ll send it back, or take it to an orphanage, or leave it on a doorstep, or something. They can’t have a kid. They’ll murder it, or drive it to suicide.” He closed the door and held the bottle out to Remus. “Even you need a drink to handle a situation like this.”
"How very generous of you." He followed Sirius out into the hallway. "Shall we apparate, or are you going to make an old werewolf like me walk?" Remus pursed his lips. Convincing Harry to send the baby to an orphanage would be beyond difficult, but maybe, just maybe, if he could show him how unsuitable the two would be as parents and how miserable they would make the baby- Yes, that would work. Harry, the little arsewipe, was always worrying about other people's children's well-being. Maybe, it was time he worried about his own. "Oh, no! I think I'm actually going to enjoy this."
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Sirius snapped out of his daze as Remus headed for the door. “Oh no you don’t.” He dashed into the kitchen, grabbed the first bottle he saw, and ran after Remus. “I know where you’re going and I’m coming. As much as I don’t want to, I’m coming. I don’t trust you to adequately scold them and save whatever poor kid they’ve abducted.” Surely, some mother was just realizing that her baby carriage was empty and suspecting that greasy, big-nosed man that had been lurking about earlier. No one would actually let them have a child.
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