"I need to sit in this feeling for a while, and process it. I don't need you to fix it for me, it's not something that can be fixed. Can you sit with me in this or not? if not, I understand and when I'm feeling up to it, I'll call you. It might not be for a couple weeks but that is what I need."
I've taken to saying something similar. It works remarkably well.
Really, no one beyond my husband notices or comments when I'm in "a crazy". I've become very, very good at controlling/hiding my issues from the world, but he always knows and tries to fix me.
I always tell them that normal is just a cycle on the washing machine, and even if it IS "normal," I don't care about that, because that's about everyone else, not me. I just need you to listen.
I'm not sure I fully understand the question, but I have a feeling it might REALLY relate to what I"m going through right now and how I need to explain it to someone!
I left it a bit vague so I wouldn't exclude any interesting answers, but it is inspired by some events from real life. I don't have a psychiatric disorder as far as I know though. It's difficult because we can't look in to other people's brains and decide "Yep! Their feelings are definitely completely different from what I'm experiencing!" and people obviously relate your feelings to their own feelings and try to comfort you in the way they would like to be comforted... it stems from a nice place, but telling a person with for example depression that "We've all been there, sweetie, it will pass. You don't need any psychiatric drugs, if you deal with this all by yourself you will come out a stronger person! Just try to think a little more positive" is probably problematic and frustrating for a person with depression.
but telling a person with for example depression that "We've all been there, sweetie, it will pass. You don't need any psychiatric drugs, if you deal with this all by yourself you will come out a stronger person! Just try to think a little more positive" is probably problematic and frustrating for a person with depression.
Fuck yeah it is!
Same as my BF reminding me that my anxiety is "part of the issue" when I feel like its something I have NO IDEA how to get control of.....which just makes me more anxious!
People I spend time with know when to back off. No one will tell me to cheer up. One or two close friends will re-frame the current situation, and that's invaluable in an instance of perspective loss.
But I sincerely don't believe depression (my own or anybody else's) is a "mood" disorder. It's an energy and perspective disorder. So I would never ask anyone to just "let me be sad." I either verbally analyze my experiences with friends, or I don't exist to them.
Oh and -- how do I explain that I don't think what I'm experiencing is normal?
Usually, "I'm having a severe break from reality," does the trick.
I have the privilege of having an immediate social circle that is both very supportive and comprised almost exclusively of people who experience depressive periods the same way that I do, though.
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Really, no one beyond my husband notices or comments when I'm in "a crazy". I've become very, very good at controlling/hiding my issues from the world, but he always knows and tries to fix me.
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No amount of "let's have ice cream!"s help.
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Fuck yeah it is!
Same as my BF reminding me that my anxiety is "part of the issue" when I feel like its something I have NO IDEA how to get control of.....which just makes me more anxious!
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But I sincerely don't believe depression (my own or anybody else's) is a "mood" disorder. It's an energy and perspective disorder. So I would never ask anyone to just "let me be sad." I either verbally analyze my experiences with friends, or I don't exist to them.
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Usually, "I'm having a severe break from reality," does the trick.
I have the privilege of having an immediate social circle that is both very supportive and comprised almost exclusively of people who experience depressive periods the same way that I do, though.
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