saints' asgard: the first ⚜ video / action;

[afuckingtiger]

[The video feed opens up to reveal the Boss in what... appears to be somewhere in house Baldr.]

Right. Listen up, just because we're in some weird-ass city doesn't mean that shit's changing.

[The Boss is looking fairly serious now as he looks into the camera.] Apparently some of you guys haven't heard of the 3rd Street Saints. Well listen up, you

Comments

[ video ]

[unifying]

What's skeeball?

video;

[afuckingtiger]

You don't know what skeeball is? What is wrong with you?

[Good lord, why does nobody here know anything about anything? They're all too busy being...

... things that aren't people who know things.]

[unifying]

S-Sorry, is knowing like a.. a prerequisite for being here? [ ;A; if so, she can learn fast! ]

[afuckingtiger]

[... oh.]

It's that game where you roll the balls up a slope, and then try to land them in the holes at the end. God damn, it's in like every arcade, didn't you go to a Buck E. Beaver's as a kid?

video

[waypastcool]

[At first Sonic just sorta stares... and then he snickers. Oh man, is this guy for real?

Well, here's one hedgehog who doesn't look even slightly intimidated.]

I'll give ya an A for effort.

video;

[afuckingtiger]

[...]

Holy shit I have been drinking way too damn much.

[Okay. Space alien troll chick he could deal with. This is definitely not a thing that's happening.

Somehow, this is probably Shaundi's fault.]

video;

[waypastcool]

If you have, that's not my problem.

[Heh, is this another guy who thinks he's not real? Fuuun.]

I'm guessin' you've never seen a hedgehog before.

video;

[afuckingtiger]

I've seen a hedgehog before. You're some sort of shitty furry mascot. Shouldn't you be at a football game getting harassed by little kids and jumping around like a retard?

[Politically correct, the Boss is not. Also nice, the Boss is not.]

[video]

[dog_in_training]

...So you're a street gang?

video;

[afuckingtiger]

Something like that, yeah.

[Like that in that ... at one point that was true. By this point in Saints' Row canon, they are way, way beyond 'just a street gang'.]

video;

[dog_in_training]

Then I'm going to have to stop you if you try anything in Thor. You know how these things go.

video;

[afuckingtiger]

"Try anything", huh.

[The Boss sounds impressed. And by impressed, that actually means not really, because he's a dick.]

I'm sure you'll put a stop to everything, of course. Regular crusader of justice, huh?

voice;

[greek_harp]

What makes you think you can proclaim ownership over the place?

voice;

[afuckingtiger]

Who the fuck do you think you are to say we can't?

voice;

[greek_harp]

No one in particular.

But it's going to take more than threats.

Re: voice;

[afuckingtiger]

If you think the Saints only operate on threats, you're a goddamn idiot.

video.

[dragonizing]

3rd Street Saints, huh?

[ ... ah. someone else laying claim to the city? he was kind of wondering when that would happen. he racks his head for anything he might've heard that resembled that name, but... nope.jpg. ]

Good joke.

video;

[afuckingtiger]

[Oh, a... samurai thing?

The Boss knows how to deal with this.]

Listen, we already kicked your ass in Stilwater. I didn't know I was gonna get to deal with the Ronin's ancestors or whatever shit.

video;

[dragonizing]

Hah?

[ in all his amazing eloquence. ]

You've got me mixed up with someone else.

video;

[afuckingtiger]

Doesn't matter. You get in the way, doesn't matter who you are, understand?