BSG fic: Agapē (PG)
TITLE: Agapē
AUTHOR:
artemis_90
RATING: PG, Kara/Lee with Leoben, Adama, and some Helo, Sam
SPOILERS: Season 3, Season 4 speculation
WORD COUNT: 2,400+
DISCLAIMERS: Despite
lurker2209 's best efforts (aka one of the best and fastest βeta on the planet), all mistakes, rambling and 'that' remain mind. Everything else good belongs to Ronald D. Moore.
A/N:1 Written for
ferr89 for the
klficathon . Her second prompt was
"Kara comes back, is in the brig, and the cylons want her. Somehow, Adama, Lee and Karl are lured/kidnapped and taken to a base star. Kara is sprung by the cylons and is brought to the group. Confrontation with Leoben. He taunts her with the fact that he's the only one that wants her. Not the would be father, the one time lover, or the cylon loving would be brother, but just him. He'd never cast her aside etc. Have her make a stand while confronting each man. Leoben dies, family reunited, etc."
A thousand apologies to her for being late and for straying from the prompt quite a bit, but this is where the Muses led instead.
A/N 2: The 'Kataris' poem Kara mumbles is, of course, based on I Corinthians 13:4.
AGAPÊ
One day Kara Thrace started to believe the “prophecies” sporadically spewed by the Hybrid whom she was forced to room with on the Base Ship. The very next day, Leoben allowed her to return to the Colonial Fleet.
But only after six weeks Leoben decided he wanted her back. Admittedly, Kara Thrace was not unhappy to see him again. It was painful to be on Galactica and have everyone she loved give up on her. The rest of the Colonial Fleet had turned her into a pariah, so the brig was her protection as well as her jail. ‘Love is patient’.
The more devout people of the Fleet already had firmly placed their faith in Roslin, their dying leader. For Kara to come back from dying with the information to Earth bespoke of heresy. And with Baltar’s cult also gaining more and more fanatics, the less devout were wary of anything that was a little too mystical.
But Kara was convinced the Hybrid was correct, that she was this “Harbinger of the Apocalypse”: The Harbinger will bring the end of the history and the Constant One will bring the beginning of the new history. The Harbinger will be given knowledge of the new Earth upon her dying. Yup, that’s me. The Constant One will be slay’d by his love seven times, and yet seven times he will return remade and unwavering to fight by the side of the Harbinger. Eight, I’ve killed Leoben eight times - so why does he believe he’s this herald of a new age?
So Kara was not truly surprised when it was Leoben who broke her out of the brig. Disappointed that it wasn’t Lee, but not surprised. Leoben had boarded Galactica with a Heavy Raider with some Centurions, during a Raider attack.
“Come with me and I’ll make sure the Centurions stop killing your people.”
So she went. They bypassed the Six without offering to free her. Leoben loaded her on the Heavy Raider and detached it from Galactica. The Centurions were left behind. Kara was Leoben’s only concern.
“Why do this?”
“We had a deal. I would arrange for your escape from the Base Ship. You’d lead the humans to Earth, you’d return to me, and together we’d begin a New Age. Together.”
“But it has only been six weeks.”
“They were getting farther and farther away from the Ionian Nebula.”
“These things take some time. Eventually- ”
“Eventually!” Leoben scoffed. “I heard the Admiral kept you in the brig and said he preferred it if you had stayed dead.” ‘Love is kind.’
Kara did her best not to flinch. Leoben always did know which cut would hurt the most. But Kara had developed some defensive tactics. If he started to mess with her head, she’d talk back - it broke the rhythm he seemed to need.
“You know, ya got tell me how you access your spy network on Galactica from the Base Ship.”
“He practically disowned you and was contemplating throwing you out of the airlock.” Well only sometimes did it break his rhythm. As a last resort to ignore the his mindfrak games, she’d recite Kataris in her head instead: ‘Love is patient, love is kind.’
“But he didn’t.” She just shrugged nonchalantly, but Kara’s insides were churning all over. “He didn’t,” she whispered to reassure herself. ‘It is not rude, it is not self-seeking.’
“If it was me, I’d have been overjoyed just to have you back in my arms, even if it was my enemy that saved you. Kara, I would have never turned away from you. Never. I love you. And obviously, your ‘family’ doesn’t.”
Despite wanting to distrust anything the Cylon says, she always suspected it was true. It didn’t help that the last four weeks in the Galactica solitary brig seemed to prove him right. ‘Love is not envious.’
•••
Six weeks ago, she had returned to Galactica with good news - she had a way to get to Earth. She knew it would be a challenge to convince the Fleet of the truth of it, but when did Starbuck ever back down from a challenge? After the first two weeks of testing and interviews - well, interrogations - they left her alone in the brig for four more weeks. How do you convince anyone, when no one will even listen? Well, no one except Lee.
When she had first landed, Lee had been the first to greet her. It felt like coming home, and the memory kept her strong during those four self-pitying weeks when all her insecurities threatened to take over her resolve. Lee was astounded at seeing her alive, flying in a pristine Mark II no less, but he was inexplicably unskeptical about her story of Earth. She saw that he believed in her no question, defying that over-thinking logical brain of his. But, the Galactica crew’s reaction had been just the opposite. They had been incredibly blasé about the miraculous return of Starbuck, but were instantly wary and suspicious when she announced that she’d take them to Earth.
Roslin took personal charge of the interrogations. Lee was there the first week, a defense to Roslin’s prosecutorial stance. But then Roslin took ill - the cancer was back - and they had to deal with the Admiral. But Adama wouldn’t come if Lee were there (apparently they feuding again). When the Admiral finally agreed to come, Sam and Helo were there for support. Lee had coached them both in their arguments, but it hadn’t mattered.
“Sir, Admiral,” Sam started, but flinched at the anger practically radiating from the Admiral. The Admiral had eyes only for Starbuck. Kara had been on the receiving end of the infamous glare before, but those previous times were tempered with disappointment and frustration and ultimately, love. Now there was only distaste and finality.
“Kara Thrace died over two months ago. If you thought taking her form would make us more amenable… you were wrong. You, you I do not know. I don’t want to. You can rot here forever for all I give a shit.” Adama’s complete intransigency was shocking, rending both Helo and Sam silent.
But Kara still tried to get through to the Admiral - too much depended on them to get back on the correct course. “Sir, We have to go back, we’re going the wrong way, every jump takes as further from the wormhole…”
But a Condition One had cut her off. The Admiral left with a parting threat, “Your presence here on my ship is inciting an unrest I find totally unacceptable.”
The next four weeks alone had been misery. Sam had died in that very same attack. Helo was hesitant to go against the Admiral, his family’s physical well-being dependent on the Adama’s goodwill; he wouldn’t risk Hera and Athena being exiled from Galactica. Meanwhile Lee had gone to try to campaign the Quorum to overrule the Admiral. Being left alone was worst than physical torture - the pain would have been a distraction to the uncertainty of being airlocked or to the torments of her old insecurities. She needed to get her head back on the game. She had destiny, no, a mission! The Old Man’s own mission, in fact: find Earth.
•••
Back in the Heavy, Leoben was still pontificating. “I know they hurt you, your family. But you still have me. I’m your family now.” Kara silently disagreed. ‘It is not arrogant nor rude.’
“Where are we going then? We still need to get to Earth.”
“Back to the Base Ship. Not to worry, I’ve disposed of the other Cylons.” Leoben grinned at her as if he had just presented her a bouquet of flowers.
“Centurions? Raiders?”
“Just a hundred for maintenance and the twenty that boarded Galactica.” Kara just shrugged. Ah well, a hundred more to go. “All twenty-four Raiders are in play. The other eleven Heavy Raiders are sleeping.”
“And the rest of the Cylon Fleet?”
“Off searching two systems away from here.”
“They don’t know you’ve turned then, to help us find Earth?”
“To help you,” Leoben corrected. “The other Cylons think we were destroyed by an astrological burst too far to resurrect. I can still access information. All this I have done for you. Have I not proven my loyalty to you?” ‘It does not boast. It is not proud.’
“I don’t want the other Cylons to follow us to Earth.”
Leoben agreed, “The New Age will begin with or without the Cylons reaching Earth.” Too bad the other Cylons doesn’t share that view. “The Hybrid can persuade the other Base Ships to turn against the other Cylons. And my model can be used to infiltrate both Fleets.” This gave Kara a thought. The Hybrid and her had become close during her previous captivity. It had some sort of indistinct loyalty or affinity to Kara - well, to the Harbinger - as did Leoben but to a lesser extent for all his talk of devotion.
Carefully, Kara took Leoben’s hand, knowing it would make him more amenable, “Have the Raiders stop firing at my pilots.”
“No! They are still firing at us.”
“Let me pilot the Raider, I’ll evade them.”
“No. It’s too risky. You are too important!”
“Stop them or I won’t return.”
“No.”
Kara took a deep breath and stoically said, “You say you love me. If you really did, then logically, you would do as I ask.” ‘Nor does love insist on its own way.’
Starbuck saw Leoben pause to consider her words. Before, she had just scoffed that a Cylon was not even able to love at all. Recently she’d been restrained, muttering poetry in her head instead. But her unusual statement gave him hope, disproportionate as it may be.
“There. The Raiders, they’ve stopped. You see? No one else could love you more than I. You can even kill me, yet I’ll always return to you.”
Kara just asked, “So where are the controls in this ship?” Don’t smirk.
Despite its bulk, the Heavy could maneuver well, but for some reason, maybe faulty programming, it flew unimaginatively and very predictably on its own. But with Kara, the Heavy flew with her reckless grace - twist and dodge.
Under the guise of evasion - flip, dive, and roll - Starbuck bought time to keep from heading toward the Base Ship. She had a decision to make first: Either escape back to Galactica and risk the Raiders and Centurions re-arming; Or, return to the Hybrid and risk the Fleet forever mistrusting her. But without her special insight, the Fleet could take generations to reach Earth. The Base Ship and the Hybrid could be used to protect the Fleet from the rest of the Cylons. Or maybe… she could use the Cylons to herd the Fleet back to Earth. But how? Starbuck’s great at making split-second tactical decisions, but Apollo’s much better at strategic long-term planning.
The remaining Cylon Raiders purposely flew to obstruct the vipers away from the Heavy, some even sacrificing themselves. Soon there would be no more Raiders and all eight vipers would be after Starbuck. Yet she still hung back, waiting. Until one viper, a Mark VII, evaded the Raiders and approached the Heavy. Starbuck deliberately used the exact evasive tactics she had used almost two years ago: Avoid, stall, and pivot. Only Apollo could have reacted in one way: he wagged his wings, then flipped to formation behind her Heavy - taking the second place to her lead.
Decision made, Starbuck careened the Heavy towards where the Base Ship was hidden behind a gas field. She could sense where the Hybrid was, just as she could tell where Galactica was, and where Earth was in relation to the two.
“A viper is following us.” Oh really? Noticing that just now?
“He’s supposed to come. The Hybrid said so.” Actually the Hybrid hadn’t, but he couldn’t know that and Kara instinctively knew the Hybrid would back her up if pressed by Leoben. “Besides the pilot is a respected man. I’m gonna need him to convince the rest of the Fleet about Earth.”
“Just remember, I’m the only one who’s never given up on us.” Here we go again. Kara did her best not to roll her eyes. ‘Love bears all things, believes all things.’
“You’ve killed me seven times, and seven times I came back to you.”
“Eight.” Kara corrected.
“Seven!” Leoben insisted. “Laura threw me out the airlock, not you!”
“Right.” Kara placated. But silently she counted the many times she had slay’d Lee: one, sleeping with that Major in Lee’s own bunk; two, agreeing to Zak’s proposal; three, accepting the post on Galactica rather than on Atlantia; four, shooting him on Cloud Nine; five, retiring from the military; six, marrying Anders; and seven, killing herself in front of him in the Mandala. And always, he picked himself up. And always, Lee came back to her. Her one true constant. ‘Love owes no obligation, it keeps no record of wrongs.’
Kara has a special destiny: It was to lead the Colonists to a new home on Earth and thus end the history of the Twelve Colonies. She’d do it too, even being a pariah to her family and people, because she wanted her pilots to have fat pilot babies. She wanted the Admiral to lay down his burdens with his mission completed, and for Karl’s family to play Sam’s beloved Pyramid in the sunlight. ‘Love hopes all things, …’
And she could not lead the Colonists from the brig. But the Hybrid was an incredible asset, though she’d have to endure Leoben’s worship. ‘…endures all things.’ If she was gonna gonna be a martyr for the Fleet, then she was gonna be selfish and have Lee stay with her this time. The Fates had decreed Kara to be special. But instead of cursing them, she was now eternally grateful. Because Lee was now special too; She was tired of pushing him away. ‘Love preserves.’
As the Base Ship came to visual range, Starbuck changed positions with Apollo, steering the Heavy to his six. To anyone else, it seemed as if the Heavy was threatening to shoot the viper if he cut and run. But just between Kara and Lee, it was a promise: “I have your back.”
To Leoben, she just smiled and made another silent promise: “It’ll be nine as soon as I can arrange it.”
FIN