Five Times a Character I Love Did Something I Didn’t Like, By RJ Lupin
Okay, this is nabbed from
magnetic_pole with a stop off at
shaggydogstail. I couldn’t help it, it grabbed me.
Five Times a Character I Love Did Something I Didn’t Like
By Remus J Lupin
1. Sirius Black. Why did you do it? Why do you rush of where angels fear to tread? Alright, so I know why. You did it for Harry, and while I love you for that, I can’t help but hate you for it too. You’ve left me again, and this time there is no return. You’ve left me lonelier, bitterer than before, and my heart burns with the pain of it. How am I to go on now? How does a broken man pick up the pieces of his heart when it’s been shattered so many times? The pieces are so small now; I can’t even see them anymore. The hole you’ve left in my soul, the one that was so recently filled has emptied again, it will follow me now, every day until death seeks me. I miss you. Oh, how I miss you.
2. Peter Pettigrew. Of all the things you’ve done, the one I hate you most for is one of the first. You set out, purposefully, to sow the seeds of mistrust between us, and oh, were you successful, and I’ll never forgive you for it. You tore us apart, tore me away from the only friends I’ve ever had, not to mention the love of my life. I could blame them for not trusting me, for giving in to suspicion, but no, the blame is all yours, Peter. You pushed Sirius, James and Lily away from me, and you made sure I stayed isolated. Congratulations, Wormtail. You’ve ruined the lives of all those who cared for you. Well Done.
3. Severus Snape. After years of vacillating between liking you and hating you, I have realized that there’s one thing I can never forgive you for. Only one thing, and coming from me, that’s saying something. You are a coward, Severus, and I still mourn for the friendship we could have had. You turned your back on me the moment things got tough, the first time my friends (okay, Sirius.) put up any sort of fuss about our growing friendship. You chose the easy way out, instead of standing up for someone who was ideally suited to you. You know we’d have done well together, you knew I was really the only person who would understand you, who would put up with you, who would be there for you. You let them chase you away, and you turned to Voldemort instead. I should take comfort in the fact that you’ve reaped what you’d sown, but I can’t. Part of me still cares, and that part will always hate you for it.
4. Nymphadora Tonks. Oh, Nymphadora, why do you have to push? Why, after all the times I’ve told you it won’t happen, do you persist? It’s hard for me to write this to you. You have a pure, loving soul that deserves so much better than to be bound to a broken man like me. The truth is; I have no heart to give you. I’ve been shattered and broken repeatedly, and my heart has left me for certain now; it fell through the veil with your cousin. I wish I could give you what you want, you deserve so much happiness. I’m sorry, Dora, you won’t find it with me. The sooner you realize that, the better it will be, for both of us.
5. The Marauders. (Yes, all three of you. Oh, and Lily.) You should have left well enough alone. I can’t help but think that, if you’d just ignored me like I wanted you to, if this could have been avoided. Likely not, but I hate that you gave me something that can never be replaced after it was torn from me. I hate that you showed me how to love, how to live, and then left me to go it alone. I hate that you showed me so clearly what I am missing. I hate you, I hate you. I love you.