I Want, I Don't Want (But If You Want...); sechen
Title: I Want, I Don't Want (But If You Want...)
Rating: NC17
Pairing: Sehun/Jongdae
Wordcount: 5600+
Warning: unbetaed, language, bad lemon, knotting, Jongdeok is a dick
Disclaimer: EXO belongs to themselves and SME
Notes: I started this as a Sehun bday fic but Jongdae and Jongdeok stole all the space before I realized it. Still, happy belated birthday Sehun, at least you got to fuck Jongdae in this fic ♥
Summary: Jongdae wants to be fucked but he's in denial and Sehun doesn't even know what he's doing, but at least he's doing it well. A/B/O omegaverse
It isn’t just that Jongdae is shy. It’s something deeper, forever carved in the crevices of his soul and in the smooth edges of his veins, a siren call that echoes in his blood and dictates his behaviour. Is the ancient call of his nature, clinging to him like a second skin wherever he goes, making him stutter and shiver and bare his neck in docile submission any time his boyfriend is in sight.
Surrender is written in Jongdae’s genetics from the day he was born, and in a world of ravenous wolves, being an omega is definitely difficult. He’s learnt to mask it, layer under layer of smiles, sassy responses and the illusion of a security he doesn’t possess, acquired in years of forced cohabitation with an arrogant alpha.
Jongdeok is a good brother but a scary alpha. He growls when Jongdae tries to steal his food, mark his own space in the house with smelly socks and used underwear and he has the insane idea that every argument between him and his little brother - there aren’t that many since Jongdeok is under the impression that he’s always right, and thank you so much for the democracy - can be resolved with a bit of wrestling. Which means that Jongdae ends up being continuously manhandled by this gigantic jock twice his age and twice his height, at least two times a week. Hence the urgent need to learn how to defend himself.
Jongdae escapes conflicts with simply disarming smiles, hides his insecurity under well planned and mocking jokes and when he can’t avoid the confront he’s sharp and lethal. In verbal quarrels doesn’t matter if you’re an alpha or an omega, if you can shut up your opponent you’ve won and Jongdae is always the quickest to storm out of the place before anyone can notice the slight dampness in his boxer and the way his body can’t help but shiver as he fights the urge to submit and just let it go, let others take care of everything.
He doesn’t let go, he resists. His show is so convincing that, by the time high school years roll out and he’s idly wasting his time in too difficult college classes, all of his friends are utterly convinced that Kim Jongdae is a beta. A sassy, whiny, annoying beta, but still a beta.
Then one day Oh Sehun comes, lean maknae with pale skin and even paler hair, bored expression and a height Jongdae would kill for. The collar of his shirt that’s always, always too low, showing the white column of his neck and making all the girls in campus crowd over him like hawks. Jongdae drools too, because Sehun is part of a dance crowd and his naked arms look like they could break him in half, but to be honest Sehun is just an overgrown sweetheart with a lisp and an undying love for his seniors, starting with Jongdae.
It doesn’t take long for Jongdae to fall in love with his pouty face and embarrassed aegyo, with the complicate, contradictory mess that is Oh Sehun, endless clinginess spiced with a poisonous tongue and cold retorts pronounced with the most adorable lisp in the world. Where Jongdae is defensive and guarded Sehun is shy, and not ashamed of it. He parades his weaknesses in front of everyone like he’s not afraid of them seeing, walks to Jongdae wearing his heart on his sleeve and cries on Zitao’s shirt for two weeks every time their eyes meet in the garden of the campus after Jongdae’s rude rejection.
It’s not that Sehun isn’t attractive, but Jongdae is so used to pretend that the thought of actually revealing his true nature is not even contemplated. And, maybe, just maybe, he feels a little ashamed of what Sehun could think of him when he finds out that Jongdae is not a beta but an omega. When he finds out that they’re not equals, or when he finds out that how much exactly Jongdae can be shameless, that he’s only dying to know how well Sehun’s big hands would fit around his hips.
He feels wronged, because he can’t afford to slip out of his charade, not even for a moment, but Sehun is sighing all around campus like he doesn’t care what people think, like the group of jock alphas from the hockey club isn’t making fun of the silly freshman with the broken heart that dared to chase the most unattainable student in a radius of two hundred miles.
That’s why he’s not expecting Sehun’s ambush, nor his hands at the sides of his head, caging him against the wall of his dorms, the door falling shut and Jongdae falling against it. Sehun is taller than him, but Jongdae isn’t worried enough about the violence of this sudden attack. The most dangerous Sehun can be is when he’s calling Jongdae mommy because Sehun has a killer pout and the fastidious ability to scratch Jongdae’s neck, almost absent-mindedly, ruining his concentration and forcing him to say yes to whatever the damn kid is asking.
But then Sehun is leaning, breathing him in, dipping his nose in the Jongdae’s panicked pulse and feeling the way blood is pumping through his little heart so fast it makes him dizzy. Sehun’s hair smell, chamomile shampoo, invades his nostrils and he dies a little inside when he realizes what Sehun is really doing. He tries to hit him, but Sehun catches his hand and unmakes his fist, taking the little fingers one by one and kissing the knuckles.
“How long did you think you could hide it, hyung?”
He doesn’t answer, and Sehun tightens his hols on Jongdae’s hand when he tries to pull away from Sehun’s lips. He feels hot all over.
“You’re an alpha,” he says instead, and Sehun smirks, all arrogance and smugness and so alpha that Jongdae cringes because how didn’t he notice before. Sehun has no shame because he’s already on top of the food chain and nothing can scare him anyway. He doesn’t confirm nor he tries to deny Jongdae’s accusation, but from the way he’s snugly nestled in between Jongdae’s legs, his captive can clearly feel the stiffness of his erection against his thigh, heavy and insistent, and mostly huge. Jongdae feels the way his body reacts to it, the raise in salivation, the answering throb in his own cock and the way his muscles spasm in need. Pheromones, he says to himself, alpha fucking privileges over poor undefended omegas, and Sehun feels he’s affected and it gives him a rush of power, Jongdae can read it in his fucking sneer and the knowing tone that laces his answers, a barely breathed, low and sinful, “And looks like you’re an omega.”
It’s illegal, it’s unfair, but it’s the call of nature and this time Jongdae can’t fight it. Sehun’s voice is different like this, lower than Jongdae has ever heard it, and Jongdae goes lax against his hold, baring his neck for the first time in years. He’s fought against his instincts for so long that he thought it’d been harder to just let go and let hierarchy follow his own path, but he doesn’t feel rusty or uncomfortable as easily let himself slip into his omega role, just relieved. Sehun will take care of him, like it should be, like it should’ve been and could’ve been, and Jongdae doesn’t understand why he’s tried so hard to prevent this from happening.
He’s always wanted a beta mate, because betas don’t have particular abilities. They can’t make his knees go weak, nor smell his arousal, they can’t bind him to them and they have no unquestionable way to find out that Jongdae is an omega. But an alpha can. An alpha can influence Jongdae’s life in ways he could barely even imagine until now, and he doesn’t even feels ashamed and pathetic that it only needed Sehun’s cock hard against his body to make him so needy, not when his mind is only occupied by the countless ways he’d let Sehun take care of him.
Everything he’s tried to bottle up and forget is now exploding in his blood. Years of repressed desires and capricious arousal make his restraints fly out of the window and he moans, leaning his head against the door to make space for Sehun’s teeth against his neck, but Sehun’s mouth doesn’t taints his skin.
“Hyung,” he calls, “Hyung!” he blows over Jongdae’s mouth, hand tilting his face to get a better look at him and to be sure he has Jongdae’s complete attention. “Hyung, please stop,” he says, and his voice almost sounds pained. Jongdae shakes his head at the offending words, mind still struggling to stay tangled in the rush of arousal, but the tense edge in Sehun’s words manages to wake him up, and reality is a nightmare. Letting himself go is just like falling, but no one is there to catch him and he just sink, fearing the pain for when he’ll hit the ground. He painfully realizes that, after a life of efforts to never let his worst side emerge, not only he’s shown it to a person who can take advantage of it, but he’s also managed to be a complete slut in front of a boy whom he respected and cherished.
Alpha-omega relationships work both ways. Just like alphas can influence omega’s hormones, omega have a similar effect on alphas self-control system, and Jongdae is so scared as he bits his tongue thinking franticly that maybe it’s his fault, oh god he’s the one who made Sehun’s erection grow so big.
The thought could be flattering, but he knows it’s not about him personally, Sehun isn’t hard for Kim Jongdae, sophomore, vice president of the choir club, former responsible of the dorms before he was caught drinking with Baekhyun and they were lucky they didn’t get suspended.
Sehun is hard because an omega couldn’t keep it in his pants, wasn’t considerate enough to hide his attraction towards a friend - and oh my god, really, he’s rejected Sehun less than two weeks ago, this is so awkward - and avoid ruining their relationship probably forever. Sehun’s muscles are strained around him, he can read the fatigue in the other’s eyes and he’ll probably have to thank Sehun later for not just giving in to the excitement and fucking him on the spot. Though, he thinks, knowing that Sehun despises him too much to go through this much pain only to avoid fucking him is humiliating and depressing.
He tries to regain control, but his mind is a mess and Sehun’s cock twitch against him tearing another moan out from his throat. “Hyung,” warns Sehun, almost growling the words now, and his hips are snapping imperceptibly against Jongdae’s, faint, rotating motions that make him even dizzier. His throat itches and burns where Sehun’s wet breaths are falling on it, and he closes his eyes when he feels Sehun’s pointy teeth on his skin, ready to tear the skin. A voice in his head is screaming that he can’t absolutely afford to be claimed like this, and Sehun must know it too, because he hesitates, trying for one last time to stop and detaches himself from Jongdae’s shivering back.
It’s too bad that his arms are giving in and before they can do anything he’s already pinning his hyung to the door with all of his body, straining erection trapped between gravity and Jongdae. Sehun’s voice is a litany in his ears, “hyung hyung hyung hyung hyung Jongdae hyung”, and then Baekhyun is banging on the door and yelling.
Furious cries of “Oh Sehun, you wanker! What the fuck are you doing to him!” wake up the entire dorms. Jongdae can already imagine heads popping out of open doors and staring at his room and everyone knowing the truth by tomorrow’s dawn, but Sehun is already scrambling away from him and muttering incoherent pleas of “I’m sorry, I didn’t, hyung, let me explain…”
Jongdae gets up on autopilot, and before Sehun can stop him he’s out of the door, stepping over Baekhyun in his haste to get away. Ignoring everyone’s curious stares at the traces of tears on his face, he runs.
Jongdeok is living a happy married life with his beta mate and their beta puppies in a little apartment near the commercial zone. They have the money to buy a two floors house with garden in the residential zone, Jongdeok is one of the best lawyers in town, but he and his wife spend so much time arguing over the right house that they haven’t bought one yet, and Jongdae doubt they ever will.
He arrives right in the middle of a furious fight, with kindergarten level insults and real estate magazines being used as improper weapons. The kids let Jongdae in, make space in their joined beds and tuck him with them, turning off the television and hugging their favourite and only uncle while their parents go through world war third in the living room.
It’s funny how Jongdeok, stubborn, arrogant alpha Jongdeok, never losing a cause, flawless lawyer Jongdeok, not only fell in love with the girl next door who used to kick him in the dick when he tried to pull her pigtails, but also let her dictate everything in the house. Because he loves her. He loved Jongdae too, but that never stopped him from beating his little brother into a bloody pulp whenever they fought.
Jongdeok is a dick, but a good dick, and in his perverted mind he’s the only one able to make Jongdae suffer, that’s why he pretends that his children are not hiding Jongdae in their bed. He also lets him stay in his home for the whole wound licking thing, only waiting the morning after to tell his brother that he has three days to sort out his shit, then he’s kicking him out of the house.
Jongdae doesn’t want to go back. He doesn’t even know if he can go back. Luckily, he has left his phone behind, and nobody, not even Baekhyun, knows Jongdeok’s address. If people started to look down on him because of his blood and the shameful omega tracts hidden in his genetics, he doesn’t think he’d be able to stand it. That’s why he spends the next three days sniffing in bed by himself, lazily browsing the web for other college options, and resisting the urge to wrap a hand around his dick with Sehun’s name on his lips. Jongdeok would immediately find out.
The third day is barely started, the kids are in school and Jongdae is still wondering about the best excuse he could dump on Jongdeok to let him stay at least until the end of the weekend, when his brother confronts him in the little, stuffy kitchen.
“You smell like frustrated dreams and not enough handjobs, brother.”
“Good morning to you too, and I never jerked off in your room,” it’s his reply. Jongdeok’s grin is as sadistic as it can be, and he had too many shark teeth. “I know. You wouldn’t be alive otherwise. But still, I can smell you wetting yourself over your little crush from my office downtown, and the entire house is impregnated with your infatuation over this boy. I think it’s time to man up and get him to ram his dick in your ass before you die of sexual starvation.”
To be honest, this isn’t the most awkward talk Jongdeok has ever given him. There’s been the first sex talk, when omega hormones started to kick in and his brother gave him lube and a giant pink dildo to help him satiate his dick hunger, those had been his exact words. Or that time when they had talked for hours of woman period because he couldn’t understand it and he felt the urgent necessity to share his doubts with a twelve year old Jongdae. It could’ve been worse, like that time he had chased Jongdae’s prom date around the gym, or when he had tried to talk their parents into paying a prostitute to take his virginity. It’s not the worst, but it’s still pretty embarrassing, and Jongdae plans a quick retreat into the kids room, but his nose bangs into a solid chest and his neck hurts because Sehun is too high and he has to crane it to a painful point to look at him.
“By the way I let him inside, and now I’m throwing you two outside because I don’t want confession and your I love you revelation sex to happen under my roof. Out, you can bang his needy ass at your own place.”
Ok, now Jongdeok has definitely topped his own chart of embarrassing moments, and from the proud look on his face, he knows.
“Your brother is terrifying,” comments casually Sehun, a little out of breath, whe the door closes behind them. He nods, “He is.”
It’s awkward, but it’s a start.
Sehun pushes him through the stairs, and into the parking lot, and Jongdae only has the time to ask how the fuck did Sehun managed to find him, already planning Baekhyun’s death because he’s the only one who knows that Jongdae will only find shelter at his brother’s when he’s distressed, but Sehun just blushes and murmurs something about following Jongdae’s smell all the way from the campus. He refuses to answer other questions and Jongdae ends up on Sehun’s motorcycle, in his pyjamas and Sehun’s leather jacket, wrapping himself koala style on the other boy’s chest while they dart at the highest speed on the slick asphalt.
Sehun shares a little apartment with Jongin and a scary alpha girl, but nobody is around when they come back. “There’s a party at Kris’ place,” explains the boy meekly as he gestures for Jongdae to sit on the couch and disappears to find something to drink. He comes back with warm tea and a wool blanket for a shivering Jongdae.
Sehun’s expression screams insecurity, but there’s no hesitation in the way he sneaks closer, and Jongdae is so relieved that Sehun still wants to talk with him, maybe he hasn’t told anyone after all, that he lets himself be manhandled on the couch until Sehun has them irremediably tangled and Jongdae has nowhere to run. Sehun is warm and Jongdae craves his touch, has been craving it for three days already.
“Hyung,” warns Sehun, “I can’t talk to you if you keep doing that.”
He’s ashamed that he can’t control himself, that Sehun can smell his desire, and his body tenses painfully, muscles going rigid until Sehun scratches his neck tenderly. “That’s it, good boy,” he coos, as Jongdae melts in his arms and purrs. Now it’s Sehun’s turn to go tense.
“Hyung, really, you’re making things so difficult for me. All I want is talk to you and get you to talk to me again. Maybe snatch a date,” he adds, as an afterthought, “if you still want to date me after I basically forced you to go into heat.”
And that’s when Jongdae realizes that Sehun has absolutely zero idea of what he’s doing and this must be his first time in trying to woo an omega. Jongdae isn’t in heat. His condition is just sexual attraction, a normal symptom of prolonged exposure to Sehun’s scandalous tank tops and pointy collarbones, and maybe his oversized cock. Omegas aren’t exactly rare but neither that common, and seeing that betas don’t exert any kind of reaction from alphas, this could be the first time for Sehun feeling this kind of intense burn in his belly.
Sehun is intelligent, no doubt, but he doesn’t appear to be the kind of boy who reads informative pamphlets about omega and heat, so everything he knows probably comes from rumours and urban legends. Jongdae doesn’t know if he should rejoice in the triumph of being his first omega or the desperation of having to teach him everything. And there’s the anxiety because Sehun seems serious about this dating thing, and Jongdae already rejected his confession once, but that was before he knew that the thought of Sehun manhandling his body could make him so hot and bothered.
Sehun misunderstands his silence. He bits his lips, “Don’t hate me, hyung, I’m sorry that I’m a horny teenager and I can’t control myself, but you’re being really really distracting.”
Jongdae squirms, Sehun growls. “I don’t want to fuck you if we’re not going out officially just because we’re not able to stop,” he pants.
Jongdae’s remark is more vicious than he wanted it to be. “So I should go out with you only because then you can have the chance to fuck me without feeling guilty?”
Sehun’s hand encases his hips as he pull Jongdae on his lap to have a better look at him.
“Don’t you like me, hyung?” he asks, pouting. “I like you a lot, and I thought you liked me too. You always spoil me during lunch and you defend me when the others try to bully me.” He smirks, nostrils flaring, “And you’re really aroused right now.”
Jongdae cries in embarrassment and tries to move back, but Sehun’s hand are secured behind him and everything is hazy and confused. Sehun is hard again, from having Jongdae there on top of him, and Jongdae feels blood pooling in his cock in response.
“I promise I’ll be good for you,” fusses Sehun as he noses Jongdae’s cheek. Jongdae idly notices the way the veins on Sehun’s hands are standing from the effort of not dipping his fingers in the soft flesh of his thighs, where he’s holding Jongdae still, and pull him down to make some friction. “I’ll treat you like a princess, if you want.”
His lisp is showing, it always does when he’s forcing himself to struggle against embarrassment and shyness, but the words are cocky enough to get Jongdae’s inner voice to scream in need.
“I don’t want to be treated like a princess,” he spits, hearing the distinct, loud sound of his self-control coiling like a spring ready to break. “I want you to fuck me on my knees. With my face planted into the mattress,” he moans, right onto Sehun’s lips. Sehun’s answering growl is triggering enough, and he tries to slap Sehun’s controlling hands away. He wants to sink down, to slide their clothed crotches together. Sehun holds him still.
“Sehunnie,” he whines, “I’m hard and you’re hard. Right?”
He grinds down, and this time Sehun lets him. Friction is delicious and delirious.
“If you can get rid of this inconvenience,” he adds, still thrusting down, “later I’ll let you treat me ice cream, alright? Please.”
Well, it wasn’t that difficult making Sehun snap too, he thinks, his back colliding with the couch as Sehun leans down to bite. “You asked for it, hyung,” is Sehun’s choked answer, but he’s clearly relieved that Jongdae gave him permission to do this. This being the slick press of sweated bodies and drag of pointy nails over sensible skin. The remote control bumps painfully against Jongdae’s hip when they shuffle on the couch, trying to find a comfortable position. Sehun almost falls, and after a painful exclamation and one of two powerful swears, Jongdae finds himself being raised in the air like a sack of potatoes while the world spins. His cock throbs when he realizes that Sehun is carrying him in his arms like he has no weight at all. Sehun’s got guns, and he turns his face to lick the muscles making the other boy almost let him fall in the process.
“Hyung,” it’s the umpteenth warning, “hyung please-”
“Fuck me,” he asks, interrupting Sehun’s tirade to kiss the skin of his neck and taste sweat and pheromones. “Please.”
Sehun dumps him on the bed, rolling him over and planting his face on the mattress, keeping him pinned there with his weight. The hand on his neck is so big, thinks Jongdae. Sehun is rutting against his ass like he’s the one in heat.
“Were you always this needy, hyung?” murmurs Sehun in his ear, his other hand making a quick job of Jongdae’s pants and underwear. “Pretending to be a beta all of this time? Did you touch yourself at night wishing you trusted someone enough to take care of you?”
All coherency lost, Jongdae can only moan his assent. “I’m lucky no one ever knew this side of you, hyung, if everybody knew they would’ve been all over your ass in a minute, but you didn’t want them, right? You want me. Let me take care of you.”
Jongdae likes Sehun, really likes him. And his inner omega trusts Sehun’s alpha. Sehun knows what to do, even if he’s never done it. His fingers know where to touch, the right angle to turn into to grace his prostate and make him wail. The pressure on his neck doesn’t disappear, it grows stronger until he’s choking on the fabric and struggling to breathe because his heart is exploding.
“You’re so wet, hyung,” says Sehun, tracing the pattern that leads his fingers into Jongdae’s ass. It’s a smooth slide, and the sticky, squelching sound makes the both of them flush.
“I’m so sorry,” mutters Jongdae incoherently, “it’s my first time. I can’t control it.”
Sehun may be unsure and new at this alpha thing, but he doesn’t need any experience, not when years of evolution have scripted the instructions on his genetic. Jongdae’s words make him snarl and scratch, and half of Jongdae is afraid he’ll lose control and bite him. The other half wants to learn the pain of Sehun’s teeth tearing the flesh away to leave their shape, the pleasure of Sehun writing his name all over Jongdae with scars that will fade only to give him the possibility to be marked again.
Jongdae is more than ready, but Sehun still uses lube to make him squirm. The unexpected coldness feels almost like a burn. “Sehun,” he exhales, “please.”
Sehun fucks him like a boy. No restraints, no teasing, just the chase of his completion through fast, sharp thrusts that send Jongdae forward until Sehun himself is tugging him back to go deeper. He’s no deliberate or scheming, but unadulterated want. Only when he cries his discomfort Sehun slows down, intertwining their fingers together and struggling with himself to set a gentler pace, though deeper. When pain subsides, all that is left is pins and needles that blossom on Jongdae’s spine and ends in his belly, where he can feel both the chafing of his cock against the mattress and of Sehun’s against his prostate. He holds tight onto Sehun’s hand, nails biting the skin of his knuckles, when the swelling begins.
Jongdae is a good omega kid. He’s done his homework in the past, so he probably knows the dynamics of knotting even better then Sehun does, but nothing could’ve prepared him at this burn in his gut. He screams this time, louder than ever and so high that Sehun’s roommate, drunk and high at a party on the other side of the campus probably heard him. Sehun, at least, doesn’t panic. He stills his hips and sneaks a hand under their bodies to caress Jongdae’s flat stomach.
“Hyung, please, you have to relax,” he begs, and Jongdae shivers and keens like a kicked puppy. Sehun’s tongue darts outside his mouth to lick his neck, and the knot twitches inside him when Sehun tastes his sweat, making Jongdae’s insides tingle.
He comes with Sehun’s hand wrapped around him, and his face planted on the mattress, feeling impossibly stuffed and oversensitive. The clench of his ass around Sehun’s dick is painful as much as hearing Sehun’s choked cry of surprise at the tightness surrounding him is pleasing.
Sehun can’t stop kissing him as the wait for the swell to disappear, mouthing along Jongdae’s backbone to his ear, licking the shell and caressing his sides. “You’ve been so good, hyung,” he says as they lay on their sides, still connected by the knot inside Jongdae. He mewls in response, not trusting his tired voice. When Sehun finally lets go of him he whines until they’re both tucked under the sheets.
“You’re pointy,” he mumbles, “how am I supposed to cuddle with you?”
“I’ll cuddle you, Jongdae-hyung,” it’s the brat’s response. “But only if you go out with me.”
“What if I say no?” he asks, genuinely curious.
“I’ll camp outside of your door every night howling at the moon until you let me in. Every night, hyung, and I’ll do puppy eyes. Like now,” Jongdae closes his eyes but it’s too late, Sehun is already working his way into Jongdae’s heart with his trademark maknae expression, “you know you can’t resist my puppy eyes, hyung.”
“I don’t want people to know I’m an omega.”
“It doesn’t have to change anything, I don’t want to date an omega, I want to date you. And I wanted you since when I thought you were still a beta, so you can continue with your charade if it helps you to sleep at night, I don’t care.”
“I just don’t want people to look at me like I’m weak.”
Sehun dips his nose in the crown of his head and beams, so different from the boy who was fucking him into the mattress a few minutes ago. He’s turned back to shy, and ridiculously happy.
“Yah, you! Why are you laughing like this? It’s creepy!”
“I had sex with hyung!” he laughs, like he can’t believe his luck. Jongdae snorts.
“Hey, can I text Taozi that you’re my boyfriend now? He used to have this huge crush on you and he laughed so much at me when you rejected me at the pool and now I can shut him up, can I? Can I?”
It’s not so bad, being Sehun’s boyfriend. Baekhyun laughs at him, half of the campus sigh because golden freshman Sehun is now engaged, the other half cries because any chance to conquer Jongdae’s delectable ass is now gone. Things are good.
Sehun still scratches his neck and sometimes, when he’s feeling horny, he palms Jongdae’s cock under the table at lunch making Baekhyun leer and spit crude remarks.
There’s only something that itches Jongdae’s mind.
“So, I see that you finally managed to get laid.” Jongdeok whistles at him, “You have his smell draped all over you.”
“He’s knotted me.”
Jongdeok splutters his coffee all over his documents, making a mess. “He’s what?”
“You know what, that thing you alpha do when you want to mark the territory. It hurts like hell, by the way.”
“Oh, this is serious. Should I call mom and dad? Little Jongdae is all grown up now, he’s found his mate and…”
Wait a minute, wants to ask Jongdae, but no words come out of his mouth. Jongdeok sends him a piteous look.
“Well, either he’s your mate, or you two were following an improbable paternal instinct, but I doubt you were trying to procreate at that time, I don’t even think you can yet. Don’t worry, you still have four or five years of crazy bareback sex to enjoy.”
Jongdae’s throat is still mute, while Jongdeok keeps talking about age and statistics and them not having to worry about puppies for at least another decade.
He finally takes control of his own vocal cords, exhaling a weak “But I thought…”
“You thought what? Do you think that we alphas wander around knotting every available hole? Is this what you think of me? Ouch, this hurts Jongdae, I never pegged you for the racist type. This kind of prejudice is obsolete, and…”
Jongdeok’s voice fades out, and all that stays is the frightening awareness that if what Jongdeok said it’s true, then Sehun is made to fit perfectly with Jongdae. “So he’s my mate?” he asks, interrupting his brother’s rambling once more.
Jongdeok’s smile is evil. “What do you say? You seem pretty smitten to me. After all, if you let him fuck your golden impregnable hole it’s because he probably had the right key hidden in his pants. I always knew you that you were a size kink whore. I can’t wait to tell mom!”
Jongdae leaves his brother’s house followed by screams, curses and the empty coffee mug crashing on the wall next to his head. Oops, Jongdae really didn’t want to spill all of the remaining coffee over his brother’s precious documents,
“Yah, kiddo!” Jongdeok’s voice follows him on the stairs, “I’m officially waiting you and your new dick for dinner. Don’t let him think he can escape the threatening talk with the alpha brother with a gun and an impressive collection of hunting knives just because he succeeded in banging what the rest of the world has failed to bang. I’m very relieved that you finally have a sex life, but I’ve been practicing my terror speech for Jongdae’s boyfriend for ten years now. Tomorrow, eight pm, don’t be late.”
Jongdae gives him the finger and runs away, jumping down the stairs and almost falling on Sehun. His boyfriend is waiting for him, leaning on the motorcycle with his leather jacket and tank top, looking sinful and perfect. Sehun still doesn’t know they’re mates, and Jongdae will keep this knowledge for himself for a little while. It doesn’t matter though, because from the way he looks at him, Sehun already knows.
“What did he say?”
“He wants to have us for dinner.”
“He still scares the hell out of me.”
“Good, because that’s exactly what he wants.”
“Well, hyung, I think you owe me a date. Ice cream at 31?”
Jongdae will end up paying because he’s the hyung and Sehun is the child, and he wants to roll his eyes at the sky, but Sehun pinches his ass and kiss his neck, and he’s squealing and whining because his boyfriend is so hot and his brother is probably cursing because they’re under his house and he can hear them.
“Let’s go.”
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A/N: title is from Lucio Battisti's 'Io Vorrei... Non Vorrei... Ma Se Vuoi', but i only took the title, no holy lyrics were used to write this word dump.
also, this should've been a smut one-shot set when they were already together but i'm probably incapable to write anything without telling the background first so it became a how I was fucked by my mate fic.
forgive me this is terrible i'm crawling in my hole of darkness to plot lu han's bday fic now.
A BIG ROUND OF APPLAUSE FOR mataariki WHO STILL PUTS UP WITH MY SHITt.
Rating: NC17
Pairing: Sehun/Jongdae
Wordcount: 5600+
Warning: unbetaed, language, bad lemon, knotting, Jongdeok is a dick
Disclaimer: EXO belongs to themselves and SME
Notes: I started this as a Sehun bday fic but Jongdae and Jongdeok stole all the space before I realized it. Still, happy belated birthday Sehun, at least you got to fuck Jongdae in this fic ♥
Summary: Jongdae wants to be fucked but he's in denial and Sehun doesn't even know what he's doing, but at least he's doing it well. A/B/O omegaverse
It isn’t just that Jongdae is shy. It’s something deeper, forever carved in the crevices of his soul and in the smooth edges of his veins, a siren call that echoes in his blood and dictates his behaviour. Is the ancient call of his nature, clinging to him like a second skin wherever he goes, making him stutter and shiver and bare his neck in docile submission any time his boyfriend is in sight.
Surrender is written in Jongdae’s genetics from the day he was born, and in a world of ravenous wolves, being an omega is definitely difficult. He’s learnt to mask it, layer under layer of smiles, sassy responses and the illusion of a security he doesn’t possess, acquired in years of forced cohabitation with an arrogant alpha.
Jongdeok is a good brother but a scary alpha. He growls when Jongdae tries to steal his food, mark his own space in the house with smelly socks and used underwear and he has the insane idea that every argument between him and his little brother - there aren’t that many since Jongdeok is under the impression that he’s always right, and thank you so much for the democracy - can be resolved with a bit of wrestling. Which means that Jongdae ends up being continuously manhandled by this gigantic jock twice his age and twice his height, at least two times a week. Hence the urgent need to learn how to defend himself.
Jongdae escapes conflicts with simply disarming smiles, hides his insecurity under well planned and mocking jokes and when he can’t avoid the confront he’s sharp and lethal. In verbal quarrels doesn’t matter if you’re an alpha or an omega, if you can shut up your opponent you’ve won and Jongdae is always the quickest to storm out of the place before anyone can notice the slight dampness in his boxer and the way his body can’t help but shiver as he fights the urge to submit and just let it go, let others take care of everything.
He doesn’t let go, he resists. His show is so convincing that, by the time high school years roll out and he’s idly wasting his time in too difficult college classes, all of his friends are utterly convinced that Kim Jongdae is a beta. A sassy, whiny, annoying beta, but still a beta.
Then one day Oh Sehun comes, lean maknae with pale skin and even paler hair, bored expression and a height Jongdae would kill for. The collar of his shirt that’s always, always too low, showing the white column of his neck and making all the girls in campus crowd over him like hawks. Jongdae drools too, because Sehun is part of a dance crowd and his naked arms look like they could break him in half, but to be honest Sehun is just an overgrown sweetheart with a lisp and an undying love for his seniors, starting with Jongdae.
It doesn’t take long for Jongdae to fall in love with his pouty face and embarrassed aegyo, with the complicate, contradictory mess that is Oh Sehun, endless clinginess spiced with a poisonous tongue and cold retorts pronounced with the most adorable lisp in the world. Where Jongdae is defensive and guarded Sehun is shy, and not ashamed of it. He parades his weaknesses in front of everyone like he’s not afraid of them seeing, walks to Jongdae wearing his heart on his sleeve and cries on Zitao’s shirt for two weeks every time their eyes meet in the garden of the campus after Jongdae’s rude rejection.
It’s not that Sehun isn’t attractive, but Jongdae is so used to pretend that the thought of actually revealing his true nature is not even contemplated. And, maybe, just maybe, he feels a little ashamed of what Sehun could think of him when he finds out that Jongdae is not a beta but an omega. When he finds out that they’re not equals, or when he finds out that how much exactly Jongdae can be shameless, that he’s only dying to know how well Sehun’s big hands would fit around his hips.
He feels wronged, because he can’t afford to slip out of his charade, not even for a moment, but Sehun is sighing all around campus like he doesn’t care what people think, like the group of jock alphas from the hockey club isn’t making fun of the silly freshman with the broken heart that dared to chase the most unattainable student in a radius of two hundred miles.
That’s why he’s not expecting Sehun’s ambush, nor his hands at the sides of his head, caging him against the wall of his dorms, the door falling shut and Jongdae falling against it. Sehun is taller than him, but Jongdae isn’t worried enough about the violence of this sudden attack. The most dangerous Sehun can be is when he’s calling Jongdae mommy because Sehun has a killer pout and the fastidious ability to scratch Jongdae’s neck, almost absent-mindedly, ruining his concentration and forcing him to say yes to whatever the damn kid is asking.
But then Sehun is leaning, breathing him in, dipping his nose in the Jongdae’s panicked pulse and feeling the way blood is pumping through his little heart so fast it makes him dizzy. Sehun’s hair smell, chamomile shampoo, invades his nostrils and he dies a little inside when he realizes what Sehun is really doing. He tries to hit him, but Sehun catches his hand and unmakes his fist, taking the little fingers one by one and kissing the knuckles.
“How long did you think you could hide it, hyung?”
He doesn’t answer, and Sehun tightens his hols on Jongdae’s hand when he tries to pull away from Sehun’s lips. He feels hot all over.
“You’re an alpha,” he says instead, and Sehun smirks, all arrogance and smugness and so alpha that Jongdae cringes because how didn’t he notice before. Sehun has no shame because he’s already on top of the food chain and nothing can scare him anyway. He doesn’t confirm nor he tries to deny Jongdae’s accusation, but from the way he’s snugly nestled in between Jongdae’s legs, his captive can clearly feel the stiffness of his erection against his thigh, heavy and insistent, and mostly huge. Jongdae feels the way his body reacts to it, the raise in salivation, the answering throb in his own cock and the way his muscles spasm in need. Pheromones, he says to himself, alpha fucking privileges over poor undefended omegas, and Sehun feels he’s affected and it gives him a rush of power, Jongdae can read it in his fucking sneer and the knowing tone that laces his answers, a barely breathed, low and sinful, “And looks like you’re an omega.”
It’s illegal, it’s unfair, but it’s the call of nature and this time Jongdae can’t fight it. Sehun’s voice is different like this, lower than Jongdae has ever heard it, and Jongdae goes lax against his hold, baring his neck for the first time in years. He’s fought against his instincts for so long that he thought it’d been harder to just let go and let hierarchy follow his own path, but he doesn’t feel rusty or uncomfortable as easily let himself slip into his omega role, just relieved. Sehun will take care of him, like it should be, like it should’ve been and could’ve been, and Jongdae doesn’t understand why he’s tried so hard to prevent this from happening.
He’s always wanted a beta mate, because betas don’t have particular abilities. They can’t make his knees go weak, nor smell his arousal, they can’t bind him to them and they have no unquestionable way to find out that Jongdae is an omega. But an alpha can. An alpha can influence Jongdae’s life in ways he could barely even imagine until now, and he doesn’t even feels ashamed and pathetic that it only needed Sehun’s cock hard against his body to make him so needy, not when his mind is only occupied by the countless ways he’d let Sehun take care of him.
Everything he’s tried to bottle up and forget is now exploding in his blood. Years of repressed desires and capricious arousal make his restraints fly out of the window and he moans, leaning his head against the door to make space for Sehun’s teeth against his neck, but Sehun’s mouth doesn’t taints his skin.
“Hyung,” he calls, “Hyung!” he blows over Jongdae’s mouth, hand tilting his face to get a better look at him and to be sure he has Jongdae’s complete attention. “Hyung, please stop,” he says, and his voice almost sounds pained. Jongdae shakes his head at the offending words, mind still struggling to stay tangled in the rush of arousal, but the tense edge in Sehun’s words manages to wake him up, and reality is a nightmare. Letting himself go is just like falling, but no one is there to catch him and he just sink, fearing the pain for when he’ll hit the ground. He painfully realizes that, after a life of efforts to never let his worst side emerge, not only he’s shown it to a person who can take advantage of it, but he’s also managed to be a complete slut in front of a boy whom he respected and cherished.
Alpha-omega relationships work both ways. Just like alphas can influence omega’s hormones, omega have a similar effect on alphas self-control system, and Jongdae is so scared as he bits his tongue thinking franticly that maybe it’s his fault, oh god he’s the one who made Sehun’s erection grow so big.
The thought could be flattering, but he knows it’s not about him personally, Sehun isn’t hard for Kim Jongdae, sophomore, vice president of the choir club, former responsible of the dorms before he was caught drinking with Baekhyun and they were lucky they didn’t get suspended.
Sehun is hard because an omega couldn’t keep it in his pants, wasn’t considerate enough to hide his attraction towards a friend - and oh my god, really, he’s rejected Sehun less than two weeks ago, this is so awkward - and avoid ruining their relationship probably forever. Sehun’s muscles are strained around him, he can read the fatigue in the other’s eyes and he’ll probably have to thank Sehun later for not just giving in to the excitement and fucking him on the spot. Though, he thinks, knowing that Sehun despises him too much to go through this much pain only to avoid fucking him is humiliating and depressing.
He tries to regain control, but his mind is a mess and Sehun’s cock twitch against him tearing another moan out from his throat. “Hyung,” warns Sehun, almost growling the words now, and his hips are snapping imperceptibly against Jongdae’s, faint, rotating motions that make him even dizzier. His throat itches and burns where Sehun’s wet breaths are falling on it, and he closes his eyes when he feels Sehun’s pointy teeth on his skin, ready to tear the skin. A voice in his head is screaming that he can’t absolutely afford to be claimed like this, and Sehun must know it too, because he hesitates, trying for one last time to stop and detaches himself from Jongdae’s shivering back.
It’s too bad that his arms are giving in and before they can do anything he’s already pinning his hyung to the door with all of his body, straining erection trapped between gravity and Jongdae. Sehun’s voice is a litany in his ears, “hyung hyung hyung hyung hyung Jongdae hyung”, and then Baekhyun is banging on the door and yelling.
Furious cries of “Oh Sehun, you wanker! What the fuck are you doing to him!” wake up the entire dorms. Jongdae can already imagine heads popping out of open doors and staring at his room and everyone knowing the truth by tomorrow’s dawn, but Sehun is already scrambling away from him and muttering incoherent pleas of “I’m sorry, I didn’t, hyung, let me explain…”
Jongdae gets up on autopilot, and before Sehun can stop him he’s out of the door, stepping over Baekhyun in his haste to get away. Ignoring everyone’s curious stares at the traces of tears on his face, he runs.
Jongdeok is living a happy married life with his beta mate and their beta puppies in a little apartment near the commercial zone. They have the money to buy a two floors house with garden in the residential zone, Jongdeok is one of the best lawyers in town, but he and his wife spend so much time arguing over the right house that they haven’t bought one yet, and Jongdae doubt they ever will.
He arrives right in the middle of a furious fight, with kindergarten level insults and real estate magazines being used as improper weapons. The kids let Jongdae in, make space in their joined beds and tuck him with them, turning off the television and hugging their favourite and only uncle while their parents go through world war third in the living room.
It’s funny how Jongdeok, stubborn, arrogant alpha Jongdeok, never losing a cause, flawless lawyer Jongdeok, not only fell in love with the girl next door who used to kick him in the dick when he tried to pull her pigtails, but also let her dictate everything in the house. Because he loves her. He loved Jongdae too, but that never stopped him from beating his little brother into a bloody pulp whenever they fought.
Jongdeok is a dick, but a good dick, and in his perverted mind he’s the only one able to make Jongdae suffer, that’s why he pretends that his children are not hiding Jongdae in their bed. He also lets him stay in his home for the whole wound licking thing, only waiting the morning after to tell his brother that he has three days to sort out his shit, then he’s kicking him out of the house.
Jongdae doesn’t want to go back. He doesn’t even know if he can go back. Luckily, he has left his phone behind, and nobody, not even Baekhyun, knows Jongdeok’s address. If people started to look down on him because of his blood and the shameful omega tracts hidden in his genetics, he doesn’t think he’d be able to stand it. That’s why he spends the next three days sniffing in bed by himself, lazily browsing the web for other college options, and resisting the urge to wrap a hand around his dick with Sehun’s name on his lips. Jongdeok would immediately find out.
The third day is barely started, the kids are in school and Jongdae is still wondering about the best excuse he could dump on Jongdeok to let him stay at least until the end of the weekend, when his brother confronts him in the little, stuffy kitchen.
“You smell like frustrated dreams and not enough handjobs, brother.”
“Good morning to you too, and I never jerked off in your room,” it’s his reply. Jongdeok’s grin is as sadistic as it can be, and he had too many shark teeth. “I know. You wouldn’t be alive otherwise. But still, I can smell you wetting yourself over your little crush from my office downtown, and the entire house is impregnated with your infatuation over this boy. I think it’s time to man up and get him to ram his dick in your ass before you die of sexual starvation.”
To be honest, this isn’t the most awkward talk Jongdeok has ever given him. There’s been the first sex talk, when omega hormones started to kick in and his brother gave him lube and a giant pink dildo to help him satiate his dick hunger, those had been his exact words. Or that time when they had talked for hours of woman period because he couldn’t understand it and he felt the urgent necessity to share his doubts with a twelve year old Jongdae. It could’ve been worse, like that time he had chased Jongdae’s prom date around the gym, or when he had tried to talk their parents into paying a prostitute to take his virginity. It’s not the worst, but it’s still pretty embarrassing, and Jongdae plans a quick retreat into the kids room, but his nose bangs into a solid chest and his neck hurts because Sehun is too high and he has to crane it to a painful point to look at him.
“By the way I let him inside, and now I’m throwing you two outside because I don’t want confession and your I love you revelation sex to happen under my roof. Out, you can bang his needy ass at your own place.”
Ok, now Jongdeok has definitely topped his own chart of embarrassing moments, and from the proud look on his face, he knows.
“Your brother is terrifying,” comments casually Sehun, a little out of breath, whe the door closes behind them. He nods, “He is.”
It’s awkward, but it’s a start.
Sehun pushes him through the stairs, and into the parking lot, and Jongdae only has the time to ask how the fuck did Sehun managed to find him, already planning Baekhyun’s death because he’s the only one who knows that Jongdae will only find shelter at his brother’s when he’s distressed, but Sehun just blushes and murmurs something about following Jongdae’s smell all the way from the campus. He refuses to answer other questions and Jongdae ends up on Sehun’s motorcycle, in his pyjamas and Sehun’s leather jacket, wrapping himself koala style on the other boy’s chest while they dart at the highest speed on the slick asphalt.
Sehun shares a little apartment with Jongin and a scary alpha girl, but nobody is around when they come back. “There’s a party at Kris’ place,” explains the boy meekly as he gestures for Jongdae to sit on the couch and disappears to find something to drink. He comes back with warm tea and a wool blanket for a shivering Jongdae.
Sehun’s expression screams insecurity, but there’s no hesitation in the way he sneaks closer, and Jongdae is so relieved that Sehun still wants to talk with him, maybe he hasn’t told anyone after all, that he lets himself be manhandled on the couch until Sehun has them irremediably tangled and Jongdae has nowhere to run. Sehun is warm and Jongdae craves his touch, has been craving it for three days already.
“Hyung,” warns Sehun, “I can’t talk to you if you keep doing that.”
He’s ashamed that he can’t control himself, that Sehun can smell his desire, and his body tenses painfully, muscles going rigid until Sehun scratches his neck tenderly. “That’s it, good boy,” he coos, as Jongdae melts in his arms and purrs. Now it’s Sehun’s turn to go tense.
“Hyung, really, you’re making things so difficult for me. All I want is talk to you and get you to talk to me again. Maybe snatch a date,” he adds, as an afterthought, “if you still want to date me after I basically forced you to go into heat.”
And that’s when Jongdae realizes that Sehun has absolutely zero idea of what he’s doing and this must be his first time in trying to woo an omega. Jongdae isn’t in heat. His condition is just sexual attraction, a normal symptom of prolonged exposure to Sehun’s scandalous tank tops and pointy collarbones, and maybe his oversized cock. Omegas aren’t exactly rare but neither that common, and seeing that betas don’t exert any kind of reaction from alphas, this could be the first time for Sehun feeling this kind of intense burn in his belly.
Sehun is intelligent, no doubt, but he doesn’t appear to be the kind of boy who reads informative pamphlets about omega and heat, so everything he knows probably comes from rumours and urban legends. Jongdae doesn’t know if he should rejoice in the triumph of being his first omega or the desperation of having to teach him everything. And there’s the anxiety because Sehun seems serious about this dating thing, and Jongdae already rejected his confession once, but that was before he knew that the thought of Sehun manhandling his body could make him so hot and bothered.
Sehun misunderstands his silence. He bits his lips, “Don’t hate me, hyung, I’m sorry that I’m a horny teenager and I can’t control myself, but you’re being really really distracting.”
Jongdae squirms, Sehun growls. “I don’t want to fuck you if we’re not going out officially just because we’re not able to stop,” he pants.
Jongdae’s remark is more vicious than he wanted it to be. “So I should go out with you only because then you can have the chance to fuck me without feeling guilty?”
Sehun’s hand encases his hips as he pull Jongdae on his lap to have a better look at him.
“Don’t you like me, hyung?” he asks, pouting. “I like you a lot, and I thought you liked me too. You always spoil me during lunch and you defend me when the others try to bully me.” He smirks, nostrils flaring, “And you’re really aroused right now.”
Jongdae cries in embarrassment and tries to move back, but Sehun’s hand are secured behind him and everything is hazy and confused. Sehun is hard again, from having Jongdae there on top of him, and Jongdae feels blood pooling in his cock in response.
“I promise I’ll be good for you,” fusses Sehun as he noses Jongdae’s cheek. Jongdae idly notices the way the veins on Sehun’s hands are standing from the effort of not dipping his fingers in the soft flesh of his thighs, where he’s holding Jongdae still, and pull him down to make some friction. “I’ll treat you like a princess, if you want.”
His lisp is showing, it always does when he’s forcing himself to struggle against embarrassment and shyness, but the words are cocky enough to get Jongdae’s inner voice to scream in need.
“I don’t want to be treated like a princess,” he spits, hearing the distinct, loud sound of his self-control coiling like a spring ready to break. “I want you to fuck me on my knees. With my face planted into the mattress,” he moans, right onto Sehun’s lips. Sehun’s answering growl is triggering enough, and he tries to slap Sehun’s controlling hands away. He wants to sink down, to slide their clothed crotches together. Sehun holds him still.
“Sehunnie,” he whines, “I’m hard and you’re hard. Right?”
He grinds down, and this time Sehun lets him. Friction is delicious and delirious.
“If you can get rid of this inconvenience,” he adds, still thrusting down, “later I’ll let you treat me ice cream, alright? Please.”
Well, it wasn’t that difficult making Sehun snap too, he thinks, his back colliding with the couch as Sehun leans down to bite. “You asked for it, hyung,” is Sehun’s choked answer, but he’s clearly relieved that Jongdae gave him permission to do this. This being the slick press of sweated bodies and drag of pointy nails over sensible skin. The remote control bumps painfully against Jongdae’s hip when they shuffle on the couch, trying to find a comfortable position. Sehun almost falls, and after a painful exclamation and one of two powerful swears, Jongdae finds himself being raised in the air like a sack of potatoes while the world spins. His cock throbs when he realizes that Sehun is carrying him in his arms like he has no weight at all. Sehun’s got guns, and he turns his face to lick the muscles making the other boy almost let him fall in the process.
“Hyung,” it’s the umpteenth warning, “hyung please-”
“Fuck me,” he asks, interrupting Sehun’s tirade to kiss the skin of his neck and taste sweat and pheromones. “Please.”
Sehun dumps him on the bed, rolling him over and planting his face on the mattress, keeping him pinned there with his weight. The hand on his neck is so big, thinks Jongdae. Sehun is rutting against his ass like he’s the one in heat.
“Were you always this needy, hyung?” murmurs Sehun in his ear, his other hand making a quick job of Jongdae’s pants and underwear. “Pretending to be a beta all of this time? Did you touch yourself at night wishing you trusted someone enough to take care of you?”
All coherency lost, Jongdae can only moan his assent. “I’m lucky no one ever knew this side of you, hyung, if everybody knew they would’ve been all over your ass in a minute, but you didn’t want them, right? You want me. Let me take care of you.”
Jongdae likes Sehun, really likes him. And his inner omega trusts Sehun’s alpha. Sehun knows what to do, even if he’s never done it. His fingers know where to touch, the right angle to turn into to grace his prostate and make him wail. The pressure on his neck doesn’t disappear, it grows stronger until he’s choking on the fabric and struggling to breathe because his heart is exploding.
“You’re so wet, hyung,” says Sehun, tracing the pattern that leads his fingers into Jongdae’s ass. It’s a smooth slide, and the sticky, squelching sound makes the both of them flush.
“I’m so sorry,” mutters Jongdae incoherently, “it’s my first time. I can’t control it.”
Sehun may be unsure and new at this alpha thing, but he doesn’t need any experience, not when years of evolution have scripted the instructions on his genetic. Jongdae’s words make him snarl and scratch, and half of Jongdae is afraid he’ll lose control and bite him. The other half wants to learn the pain of Sehun’s teeth tearing the flesh away to leave their shape, the pleasure of Sehun writing his name all over Jongdae with scars that will fade only to give him the possibility to be marked again.
Jongdae is more than ready, but Sehun still uses lube to make him squirm. The unexpected coldness feels almost like a burn. “Sehun,” he exhales, “please.”
Sehun fucks him like a boy. No restraints, no teasing, just the chase of his completion through fast, sharp thrusts that send Jongdae forward until Sehun himself is tugging him back to go deeper. He’s no deliberate or scheming, but unadulterated want. Only when he cries his discomfort Sehun slows down, intertwining their fingers together and struggling with himself to set a gentler pace, though deeper. When pain subsides, all that is left is pins and needles that blossom on Jongdae’s spine and ends in his belly, where he can feel both the chafing of his cock against the mattress and of Sehun’s against his prostate. He holds tight onto Sehun’s hand, nails biting the skin of his knuckles, when the swelling begins.
Jongdae is a good omega kid. He’s done his homework in the past, so he probably knows the dynamics of knotting even better then Sehun does, but nothing could’ve prepared him at this burn in his gut. He screams this time, louder than ever and so high that Sehun’s roommate, drunk and high at a party on the other side of the campus probably heard him. Sehun, at least, doesn’t panic. He stills his hips and sneaks a hand under their bodies to caress Jongdae’s flat stomach.
“Hyung, please, you have to relax,” he begs, and Jongdae shivers and keens like a kicked puppy. Sehun’s tongue darts outside his mouth to lick his neck, and the knot twitches inside him when Sehun tastes his sweat, making Jongdae’s insides tingle.
He comes with Sehun’s hand wrapped around him, and his face planted on the mattress, feeling impossibly stuffed and oversensitive. The clench of his ass around Sehun’s dick is painful as much as hearing Sehun’s choked cry of surprise at the tightness surrounding him is pleasing.
Sehun can’t stop kissing him as the wait for the swell to disappear, mouthing along Jongdae’s backbone to his ear, licking the shell and caressing his sides. “You’ve been so good, hyung,” he says as they lay on their sides, still connected by the knot inside Jongdae. He mewls in response, not trusting his tired voice. When Sehun finally lets go of him he whines until they’re both tucked under the sheets.
“You’re pointy,” he mumbles, “how am I supposed to cuddle with you?”
“I’ll cuddle you, Jongdae-hyung,” it’s the brat’s response. “But only if you go out with me.”
“What if I say no?” he asks, genuinely curious.
“I’ll camp outside of your door every night howling at the moon until you let me in. Every night, hyung, and I’ll do puppy eyes. Like now,” Jongdae closes his eyes but it’s too late, Sehun is already working his way into Jongdae’s heart with his trademark maknae expression, “you know you can’t resist my puppy eyes, hyung.”
“I don’t want people to know I’m an omega.”
“It doesn’t have to change anything, I don’t want to date an omega, I want to date you. And I wanted you since when I thought you were still a beta, so you can continue with your charade if it helps you to sleep at night, I don’t care.”
“I just don’t want people to look at me like I’m weak.”
Sehun dips his nose in the crown of his head and beams, so different from the boy who was fucking him into the mattress a few minutes ago. He’s turned back to shy, and ridiculously happy.
“Yah, you! Why are you laughing like this? It’s creepy!”
“I had sex with hyung!” he laughs, like he can’t believe his luck. Jongdae snorts.
“Hey, can I text Taozi that you’re my boyfriend now? He used to have this huge crush on you and he laughed so much at me when you rejected me at the pool and now I can shut him up, can I? Can I?”
It’s not so bad, being Sehun’s boyfriend. Baekhyun laughs at him, half of the campus sigh because golden freshman Sehun is now engaged, the other half cries because any chance to conquer Jongdae’s delectable ass is now gone. Things are good.
Sehun still scratches his neck and sometimes, when he’s feeling horny, he palms Jongdae’s cock under the table at lunch making Baekhyun leer and spit crude remarks.
There’s only something that itches Jongdae’s mind.
“So, I see that you finally managed to get laid.” Jongdeok whistles at him, “You have his smell draped all over you.”
“He’s knotted me.”
Jongdeok splutters his coffee all over his documents, making a mess. “He’s what?”
“You know what, that thing you alpha do when you want to mark the territory. It hurts like hell, by the way.”
“Oh, this is serious. Should I call mom and dad? Little Jongdae is all grown up now, he’s found his mate and…”
Wait a minute, wants to ask Jongdae, but no words come out of his mouth. Jongdeok sends him a piteous look.
“Well, either he’s your mate, or you two were following an improbable paternal instinct, but I doubt you were trying to procreate at that time, I don’t even think you can yet. Don’t worry, you still have four or five years of crazy bareback sex to enjoy.”
Jongdae’s throat is still mute, while Jongdeok keeps talking about age and statistics and them not having to worry about puppies for at least another decade.
He finally takes control of his own vocal cords, exhaling a weak “But I thought…”
“You thought what? Do you think that we alphas wander around knotting every available hole? Is this what you think of me? Ouch, this hurts Jongdae, I never pegged you for the racist type. This kind of prejudice is obsolete, and…”
Jongdeok’s voice fades out, and all that stays is the frightening awareness that if what Jongdeok said it’s true, then Sehun is made to fit perfectly with Jongdae. “So he’s my mate?” he asks, interrupting his brother’s rambling once more.
Jongdeok’s smile is evil. “What do you say? You seem pretty smitten to me. After all, if you let him fuck your golden impregnable hole it’s because he probably had the right key hidden in his pants. I always knew you that you were a size kink whore. I can’t wait to tell mom!”
Jongdae leaves his brother’s house followed by screams, curses and the empty coffee mug crashing on the wall next to his head. Oops, Jongdae really didn’t want to spill all of the remaining coffee over his brother’s precious documents,
“Yah, kiddo!” Jongdeok’s voice follows him on the stairs, “I’m officially waiting you and your new dick for dinner. Don’t let him think he can escape the threatening talk with the alpha brother with a gun and an impressive collection of hunting knives just because he succeeded in banging what the rest of the world has failed to bang. I’m very relieved that you finally have a sex life, but I’ve been practicing my terror speech for Jongdae’s boyfriend for ten years now. Tomorrow, eight pm, don’t be late.”
Jongdae gives him the finger and runs away, jumping down the stairs and almost falling on Sehun. His boyfriend is waiting for him, leaning on the motorcycle with his leather jacket and tank top, looking sinful and perfect. Sehun still doesn’t know they’re mates, and Jongdae will keep this knowledge for himself for a little while. It doesn’t matter though, because from the way he looks at him, Sehun already knows.
“What did he say?”
“He wants to have us for dinner.”
“He still scares the hell out of me.”
“Good, because that’s exactly what he wants.”
“Well, hyung, I think you owe me a date. Ice cream at 31?”
Jongdae will end up paying because he’s the hyung and Sehun is the child, and he wants to roll his eyes at the sky, but Sehun pinches his ass and kiss his neck, and he’s squealing and whining because his boyfriend is so hot and his brother is probably cursing because they’re under his house and he can hear them.
“Let’s go.”
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A/N: title is from Lucio Battisti's 'Io Vorrei... Non Vorrei... Ma Se Vuoi', but i only took the title, no holy lyrics were used to write this word dump.
also, this should've been a smut one-shot set when they were already together but i'm probably incapable to write anything without telling the background first so it became a how I was fucked by my mate fic.
forgive me this is terrible i'm crawling in my hole of darkness to plot lu han's bday fic now.
A BIG ROUND OF APPLAUSE FOR mataariki WHO STILL PUTS UP WITH MY SHITt.