This Is Your Life: Chapter Twenty-Four

[aoitsukikage]

Notes:

1. Remember me? No? Hi, I’m back! This chapter kind of hit me out of nowhere, and I apolgize for the dramatic ending, but my parents were watching a show with one of those overtly-serious news announcers, and it influenced my writing >.<

2. I actually wrote a chapter WITHOUT the inclusion of my two main characters. I wanted to

Comments

[noodlesticks]

Oh god, the rain, the 'death', this is foreshadowing isn't it? ISN'T IT!?

Besides that, I love how you write Law and Kidd, and that Law calls him "Mr. Kidd" hehe.

Great chapter. Also a great look inside the psyche of Ace and Shanks and Mihawks relationship.

[aoitsukikage]

I can't answer that or it would make the suspense meaningless!!!. And honestly, it rains a LOT in Vancouver in October. Which stinks, because it's usually the only time my family can go xP

I've looked for ways to translate Law's 'ya' at the end of his sentences, and there really...aren't any. The closest I've come is that it's kind of a meaningless semi-colon that doesn't lead to anything, so I just have him being rather weirdly polite. Even toward Kidd.

With recent chapters, I've written a lot of Ace-introspection, it seems. And Shanks and Mihawk have such a strange bond, so it's fun to write about them as well.

Glad you enjoyed!

[huang_yin]

AHH :DDDD

I love your idea of not putting the two main characters in this chapter but focusing on everyone else (Err, you know what I mean). The emotions are all there and it's just lovely~ No words can can explain how happy I am right now :D

Paulie's and Iceburg's conversation deteriorated in like two seconds and that just made me lauuugh and lauuugh <3

Keep on the amazing writing! Can't wait for the next update! Because that cliff-hanger is going to be killing me

October in Vancouver

[aoitsukikage]

I've been reading a lot of emotion-heavy fics lately (mostly from another fandom) so I think some of that rubbed off in my writing xP I'm glad you liked it, though ^_^

Iceburg and Paulie are cool like that :P I know they're capable of having serious conversations, but it's so much more entertaining when they don't.

And yes, completely ^_^ I swear we would stand around and go, "Oh look! Five minutes of sunlight! That's all we're going to get today!" XD

[theotherdenise]

I love how this chapter is constructed. I suspect if I re-read this story from the start (something I plan to do for the final chapter) it would stand out as being the most well written.

Poor Smoker, having to put up with whiny lovesick Ace. xP

“Baby, the big words don’t work, remember?” Lol, oh Franky XD

And I love the conversation between Law and Kidd. Law's manipulative streak was very nicely done :D

One little quibble is how it seems pretty much everyone has been paired off. Well, apart from an odd few characters - Kalifa stands out particularly because she's the female character that's known to sleep around - it just feels a bit too convenient. That's probably just me, though, sorry. ^^; Out of curiosty, was it a deliberate commentary or did it just out that way?

*Refuses to think about October when the last few days of summer can still be enjoyed*

[aoitsukikage]

Ack, I'm actually afraid that people are going to read through the fic from start to finish and go..."Well, the style changes every other chapter..." because I'm sure it does. That's what happens when it takes you 3/4 of a year to write a fic...and more by the time I'm done...

But I agree that this chapter is rather different from the others style-wise, which I attribute to having come from me reading so many angsty RENT fanfics wherein human emotions play a big part xP

Aw, Smoker loves putting up with Ace, even if he won't admit it.

And I honestly don't think Franky is stupid, but I just see Robin's turns of phrase going over his head sometimes :P

Haha, Law can be as manipulative as he wants to be, I think.

Oh, and after reading that, see my icon? That's totally me. I had no idea I was pairing off people like that, but now that you mention it, it does seem that way xP So to answer your question, it was completely coincidental and holds no insight into the characters in the story. And I just see Kalifa as needing a guy

[theotherdenise]

To be fair, you've put in a lot of work to get this far with the story and posting fairly regularly. In that amount of time, of course your style will develop. So it's not necessarily a bad thing if people can see you improve with each chapter.

I think Franky has a very specific type of intelligence - when its things like design and engineering he's a genius; them fancy words, not so much XD

Lol, okay. XD And I agree about the kind of guy Kalifa would need.

[aoitsukikage]

Aw, thank you ^_^. I'm glad you feel it's improving, at least xP. But I definitely know that my style has changed even in the last year.

Oh, and I agree: Franky's pretty much the opposite of me. I basically break everyone electronic or mechanical that I touch, so I admire people who can fix things with ease.

[ginnyvos]

I loved the repetition, it really worked. The starting of the rain, the 'Ocrober in Vancouver' comment. It was very effective and bound the short scenes together very well. It was also very familiar, since in the Netherlands rain is a lot of the same.

[aoitsukikage]

I wasn't in a particularly dreary mood when I wrote most of this chapter, but it certainly came out very melancholy.

I used to live in a desert, so rain in the fall was something we never saw unless we went out to the coast, which is probably why the idea has stuck with me.

[dndr310]

great as usual :)

[aoitsukikage]

Thanks :D