Fic: ER, "Pause/Resume"

[anxietygrrl]

Title: Pause/Resume
Fandom: ER
Characters/Pairing: Ray, Ray/Neela
Rating: T
Spoilers: s13 (post-s13 AU)

Notes: I'm sure this ground has already been covered (and covered), but apparently this nonsense isn't done breaking my heart, so I thought I'd take one more go at it. Just a short piece. Unrelated to "Repeat One", though it has a similar style

Comments

[jesshelga]

Three years is more than enough time to stop hating someone, and if it's enough for that, it's got to be enough time to stop loving her, too.

So this is where my heart broke.

And it was a constant back-and-forth of breaking and knitting and breaking again. Because even when they were together:
Her small, dark hands are trembling. Her palms are soft on your face.

She opens people up and tries so hard to fix them, she tries so hard.

You're not the only one with scars.

It's still filled with the past and sadness.

Argh (but in a bittersweet, highly awesome way).

[anxietygrrl]

...not fail?

(I honestly can't evaluate because I'm so self-conscious about how earnestly this subject breaks my heart.)

Notice which icon I didn't use

[jesshelga]

...not fail?

Yeah, I would say that. I would stand by that statement.

Also, I might add STABINATION re: my heart. And a so-lame-you'd-be-proud "eeeeeee" when They Finally Got Together.

(Update: Clemente just hit on a 21-year-old while chewing gum like it was a 10-year supply of cud. Show, when you add in stuff about him being all emotional and having a mean married girlfriend, that's why I still don't care about him. Blech.)

I can't wait 'til that icon debuts.

[anxietygrrl]

Here's the thing about Clemente. A thing. One of the many things, all of them annoying.

The show is clearly telling us, "Check out this guy! He is an OUTSTANDING character!" But the entire time he's around, our friends the regular characters are looking at him like "Why the fuck are you here again?"

Does this thing need a title?

[hiddenw]

w00t.

Considering you got me into this pairing (and actually watching ER for a year), you should totally be responsible for creating closure ;) And you succeed =P

[anxietygrrl]

Aw, thank you! I'm happy you liked it, yay.

(And ha, yeah, sorry about that. When I started selling this pairing I didn't expect the payoff to be TOTAL DOOMINATION.

Heh. Obviously I'm the one who needs closure.)

[phindle]

Wow. I can't believ I missed this on ff.net. This is simply gorgeous. The whole cutting/breaking apart and knitting back together thing that you have working through the whole thing is fantastic, it ties the whole piece together without being too heavy. And some of the sentences are just beautiful. I particularly loved

"Three years is more than enough time to stop hating someone, and if it's enough for that, it's got to be enough time to stop loving her, too"

and

"This isn't-- Look. We're not going to be friends again. This was just...so the last time we saw each other wouldn't be the last time we saw each other."

Guh. This is why in many ways I hope we don't get proper closure on the show, because much as I'm going to firebomb NBC if it doesn't happen, they will never be able to produce anything this raw and emotionally truthful. Loved it.

[anxietygrrl]

Wow, thank you so much, sincerely. That makes me really happy I decided to un-friends-lock this.

because much as I'm going to firebomb NBC if it doesn't happen

Augh, I know! And I know better, but I still want it so bad. Sigh.

[profshallowness]

Marvellous. Very immediate, saying just enough and reminding me of the epic angst of Ray/Neela, but how it was all worth it too.

[anxietygrrl]

Thank you so much! I'm always glad when this story gets a visitor.