(Untitled)

[anticlaw]

Right, so. I'm now officially adding "my parents drunk" to the list of things that I would Never Like To See Again, Ever. Especially when they ended up getting completely shitefaced on, of all things, prissy brand-name chocolate liqueur. Who even does that, besides randy Sixth Year girls who fancy themselves foxy and cultured? No one, that's who,

Comments

[pettyking]

Reading about your parents isn't much better.

[anticlaw]

Poor, poor little baby.

[pettyking]

It was a point I was making, a point that you missed. All the whinging isn't that impressive. It's not really our faults you're surrounded by superiority.

[anticlaw]

Oh, irony.

[canined]

I'm not surprised you spent your hols single, but I am surprised some blokes were able to find your chest, let alone squeeze it! Fascinating.

[anticlaw]

Right, I'm not even sure what that insult was supposed to mean. Is it that I'm too short, too tall or flat chested?

[canined]

Your chest, McKinnon, is concaved.

[anticlaw]

Have you been testing your jabs on pubescent girls, Sirius? That one lost the ability to hurt my feels when I turned thirteen. Please update your material.

[obsidere]

!!! LANGUAGE.

[anticlaw]

Fuck cocksucking bugger cunt.

[obsidere]

You are not very nice but those are not the ones that bother me!!

[anticlaw]

Twat pillowbiter minger wanker sod.

[dirigere]

Oh THAT's why I missed you at the Ministry shindig! Scamander made me go. I wasn't grabbed by anyone, though, which is just as well. Did you know they use the same mistletoe every single year? Merlin knows what nasties have infested that stuff. I might include it in next week's radio show.

Sybill and I are flat hunting. Hunting for flats! Wot, that sounds funny, they're not animals after all. We're going to have a party once we find one. You should come and bring your Runes book with you. That way, if we're boring (or if the rum runs out! YES, Sybill insists that we have rum), you can sit in a cosy corner and read it instead.

[anticlaw]

That would be why. Although I doubt the Ministry wants loiterers like my hanging about with nothing to contribute besides Keeper gloves and terrible liqueur.

Sounds excellent to me, thanks, I'll be there whenever you find one. I'm hardly the type of girl to turn down an invitation of rum and books. Just keep an eye out for suspicious stains and animal droppings and I'm sure you two'll be just fine.

[dirigere]

Oh, no, animal droppings never hurt anyone. In fact, they'd be brilliant for the herb garden. Always wanted one of those, but my mother preferred fruit trees, never mind that crab apples are supposed to be bad luck for avoiding baldness. So much jelly! Every day for breakfast, scones with crab apple jelly, or porridge with crab apple jelly, or toast with crab apple jelly. I promise you Sybill and I will never stock it. Strictly marmalade from now on.

[anticlaw]

Well, ah, marmalade's good too.

[fabium]

I see your place of employment is trying to outdo mine on its New Year's decorations.

Also, I think it's only 'scarring for life' if they tried to conceive a new sibling for you while the others watched. And then the planets have to align a little more, so they have to be on the coffee table with the family photo album supporting your mum. Preferably opened to your first day of school? Scarring for life is a pretty big deal.

[anticlaw]

Should I be worried that you seem to know all the steps for scarring a child for life?

[fabium]

I have a lot of nephews. You learn pretty quickly what will or won't have them staring at you and twitching for days.

And how are you, Marlene? Scarring, drinking, groping, partying, bitching, and other participles aside?

[anticlaw]

I'm well, thanks Fabian, and you? Have you shot any resolutions to hell, yet?