I have made up my mind now...

[anteros_lmc]

One of the papers we heard at the Port Towns conference was about the experiences of sailor's wives in the Åland Islands and the presenter finished with this lovely piece. She referred to it as an American poem called "The Sailors Wife", but it seems that it's better known as "The Nantucket Girls Song". I suspect some of you will be very familiar

Comments

[eglantine_br]

This is actually true. Navy wives have a sort of cycle-- you are very sad just before they leave, and just after.Then, for say the middle four months, you are ok. Then you are very happy just before and just after they come home. Then there is an annoying period--say form three weeks back on, where you rediscover all their annoying ways, and revisit all the my-way, your-way stuff.

I used to actually plan for it.

Of course Nantucket whalers left for years at a time. So that changed the cycle.

Also, you do recall the 'he's at home' !!

[nodbear]

we thought of you instantly when we heard this song quoted in the presentation

thinking of you planning for it reminds me of Susan and her careful but amusing affectionate preparatory letters facing up to the fact that four years changes a lot of things - and how very many households must have seen that same pattern going on

[anteros_lmc]

As nodbear said, we felt sure that you'd identify with this. I've known a lot of women, my sister included, whose partners worked on the North Sea oil rigs and supply ships and their experience is similar. It's funny how the experience of the women endures while the role of the men changes. Although in my own case, I was always the one leaving, for longer spells when I was an archaeologist and for shorter trips more recently. I'm done with travelling for the time being though.

Of course Nantucket whalers left for years at a time. So that changed the cycle
Indeed. Though it's interesting to note that this was written by a Nantucket woman on board a whaler in New Zealand's Bay of Islands. Perhaps she was wishing she'd stayed at home spending the money... ;)

Also, you do recall the 'he's at home' !!
How could one forget?!

[eglantine_br]

Oh yes. It is a thing you prepare for, if you have been through it a few times. Strange to have them home, and strange to be home for them. There is a sense of taking up a thing that was set down. But you are never quite the same person you were before, so the fit is a little odd for a while.

I am sure Susan and Ned learned to treat each other with patience. (And I am sure there were times when she--at least for a moment-- wished he would just go to sea!

[anteros_lmc]

And I am sure there were times when she--at least for a moment-- wished he would just go to sea!
And take his tigers with him!!!