I will say the minor netspeak kinda made me twitch, but other than that, it is a good start to something if you continue. It's interesting, and Mello's entirely in-character. Near is just a tad off the normal meter, but for this kind of fic, it's fine. It's nothing glaring.
Thanks for the con/crit and encouragement! And as for the net speak ...zomg, wtf is wrong with me?! This is why I need a beta. I'm so embarrassed. There's really no excuse for that.
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