[FIC] Win or Lose
Title: Win or Lose
Pairing: implied!Hyukjae/Sungmin; bff!Kyuhyun/Sungmin; Hyukjae/Donghae
Genre: Angst
Rating: PG-13
Summary: “If you fall in love, you lose.”
He’s standing outside Sungmin’s house. It’s a weekend and they both agreed to go out, not a date but like hanging out. Today, Hyukjae needs to tell something very important to Sungmin. A decision he needs to tell sooner. Hyukjae kicks another rock as he waits for Sungmin to finish preparing himself. He cannot go inside because Sungmin’s parents are there. It will be awkward again if they met just like what happened a few weeks back.
(flashback)
“Min, you sure your parents aren’t home?”
“Yup.” He replies as he unlocked the door. Once opened, the two went in and Sungmin asks Hyukjae if he wanted something to drink. He goes to the kitchen and Hyukjae explored around the living room. He sees some childhood photos of Sungmin and smiles to himself. ‘So cute.’ He settles himself on the couch and wanders his eyes around.
“Here you go Hyuk.” Sungmin gently places his glass of juice on the table. He sits next to him. “What do you want to do?”
Hyukjae stares at him for a second. He focuses his eyes to Sungmin’s face and it lands on his lips, feels like calling him. Hyukjae finds himself slowly leaning. “This.” He kisses him which startles Sungmin but it didn’t take long until he returned the kiss. He places his hands on Sungmin’s waist and the latter slowly puts his arms around Hyukjae’s neck. They both deepen the kiss, making out right there until they heard a knock. They instantly pull away and straightened their clothes. “Your parents?”
--
“Hey. I’m sorry to make you wait.”
He looks up to see a cute boy in a pink shirt with a very beautiful smile. He instantly leans closer, giving the boy a kiss. The latter blushes right away which made Hyukjae pinched his cheeks lightly. “Let’s go?”
Sungmin nods his head as they began walking side by side. After a few seconds, Hyukjae’s hand is entwined in his. He is used to this. It’s like he needs to hold Sungmin’s hand because it keeps him warm every single time.
It’s been months or so since they’ve been in this kind of relationship. They aren’t exactly together since Hyukjae isn’t ready to commit yet. They are more than friends, less than lovers. They’ve settled in this kind of situation - a pseudo relationship. They are special to each other yet they don’t have commitment.
“Are we going to watch a movie Hyuk?”
“Yup. We’ll watch a movie then have a dinner and a walk in a park?”
“Sounds perfect.”
They enter the train which is jam-packed. Hyukjae groans as other guys keep on bumping at Sungmin. He corners Sungmin near the door to protect him from other guys. Sungmin can’t help but to hold onto him as he embraces him tight. Hyukjae regrets not taking his car in an instant.
After half an hour, they arrive at the cinema. Hyukjae lets Sungmin choose whichever movie he likes. Hyukjae tries so hard to resist Sungmin because this day would be the last day he’ll treat him like this. This thing for him is only a game. They are just playing - a fling. He must stop everything today because the person he truly likes already wanted to give himself to him. He knows it’s unfair. He knows that it might hurt Sungmin. But at the end of the day, they aren’t really together. That’s the only reason for him to escape this because they aren’t committed. He can just drop him like that.
--
“The sunset sure is pretty.” Sungmin lovingly stares at the beautiful sunset. He loves this day because it’s another day with Hyukjae. Sungmin knows the consequences of their relationship. At first, it was just a fling for him - they give each other that feeling - sexual and comfort but no attachment. Hyukjae isn’t ready to commit and Sungmin wants to have fun so they agreed with this kind of set-up after making out so many times. He found Hyukjae and the warm feeling he gives is so irresistible.
“Min.” Hyukjae slightly taps Sungmin’s shoulder. The latter glances at his side and smiles. “Hm?”
“We need to stop this.”
“Stop what?”
“This thing. I can’t see you like this anymore. I need to be with Donghae.” Hyukjae can’t even make an eye contact with Sungmin because he’s feeling guilty. Although he doesn’t know what Sungmin’s true feelings are, he knows that it might at least hurt him for unexpectedly stopping like this. After all, they’ve been in this situation for months.
Sungmin’s smile fades as those words came out from Hyukjae. Like Hyukjae, Sungmin isn’t sure about Hyukjae’s feelings but he hoped that they will be together at least and be in a real relationship once Hyukjae is ready because he thought, in those times they spent together; Hyukjae will fall for him too like how Hyukjae captured his heart. He wants to be with him. He hoped but hearing those words that moment makes his heart sinks in pain, his heart breaks in pieces, his heart - the heart that already fell in love with Hyukjae is stepped on by the person who already owns it.
Donghae is Hyukjae’s best friend, first love and everything. He’s the reason why Hyukjae isn’t ready to commit because it’s not with Donghae but just recently, Donghae confessed his feelings for him and he wanted to just say yes until he remembered about his thing with Sungmin.
“But you said-”
“Yes. I said I wasn’t ready because I’m waiting for Donghae.”
Sungmin wants to just break down right then and there. He never imagined this coming too soon especially now, not now that he already fell deeply in love with him.
“You really love him more?”
“I only love him, Sungmin.” Those words are like daggers that hit his heart and mind so hard. ‘I only love him’ means he didn’t even love him in the first place. He doesn’t even take a second glance at him. He holds back his tears - afraid to look so vulnerable in front of him.
“So, this is the e-end of us?”
“There’s no us Min. It’s only you and me from the start. We’re not even together right? So I’m telling you, I can’t do this anymore.” With those words, Sungmin lost it. His tears flow nonstop. Hyukjae’s heart is also breaking seeing him so weak that moment.
“You are so mean Hyuk! You are so mean!” ‘You made me feel like this… I already love you idiot.’
--
Weeks passed by and Sungmin buries himself to bed, crying helplessly. He doesn’t want to go to school anymore because he would only see Hyukjae being so happy with someone else. He wants to make an excuse that he’s sick but his mom doesn’t buy it. He’s forced to go.
He takes his time to walk to school, not caring whether he’ll be late or he’ll be scolded by his teacher. He takes his time, walking like a lifeless person.
Out of nowhere, his friend Kyuhyun appears but he didn’t even notice until the younger spoke.
“Hey…”
“Hm.” Kyuhyun looks at him with pity as Sungmin is like a living dead. He’s just staring in space and walking carelessly.
“You love him so much huh?”
“Yeah…”
“I told you it will only hurt you in the end, right?”
“Yeah…”
“And you didn’t listen to me…”
“Yeah…”
“You know you look ridiculous.”
“Yeah…”
Kyuhyun can’t stand seeing him like this anymore. He warned him every single chance he had just to prevent this kind of thing to happen but Sungmin never listened. He said, “I just want to enjoy while it last because it’s making me happy.” But Kyuhyun told him, “But you can be happy with the real thing hyung not with this fake relationship.” And he still didn’t listen. Now, he is a pathetic broken hearted guy.
“I told you that in this game of love, if you fall in love, you lose.”
Sungmin knows that he lost because he fell in love first and the worst thing, Hyukjae isn’t. The relationship he had with Hyukjae might be a fake one but all the emotions felt are real. He loves him damn much.
“How can you call it love when you’re crying more than smiling?”
Sungmin abruptly stops. True. He’s been crying for weeks over a stupid one-sided love. All the memories he had with Hyukjae faded in an instant as he can only remember that one night he told him off. He hates it that he’s never enough. He hates how Hyukjae didn’t love him back because he’s not Donghae. He hates it. He breaks down and cry but Kyuhyun pulls his wrist and envelopes him in a warm embrace. “Don’t cry anymore hyung. You deserve to be happy.”
“I’m sorry if I’m not enough.” He whispers.
--
A/N:
I apologize for making Hyukjae the mean one here... I'm still thinking if I could make a sequel of this for my hyukmin challenge so there...
Pairing: implied!Hyukjae/Sungmin; bff!Kyuhyun/Sungmin; Hyukjae/Donghae
Genre: Angst
Rating: PG-13
Summary: “If you fall in love, you lose.”
He’s standing outside Sungmin’s house. It’s a weekend and they both agreed to go out, not a date but like hanging out. Today, Hyukjae needs to tell something very important to Sungmin. A decision he needs to tell sooner. Hyukjae kicks another rock as he waits for Sungmin to finish preparing himself. He cannot go inside because Sungmin’s parents are there. It will be awkward again if they met just like what happened a few weeks back.
(flashback)
“Min, you sure your parents aren’t home?”
“Yup.” He replies as he unlocked the door. Once opened, the two went in and Sungmin asks Hyukjae if he wanted something to drink. He goes to the kitchen and Hyukjae explored around the living room. He sees some childhood photos of Sungmin and smiles to himself. ‘So cute.’ He settles himself on the couch and wanders his eyes around.
“Here you go Hyuk.” Sungmin gently places his glass of juice on the table. He sits next to him. “What do you want to do?”
Hyukjae stares at him for a second. He focuses his eyes to Sungmin’s face and it lands on his lips, feels like calling him. Hyukjae finds himself slowly leaning. “This.” He kisses him which startles Sungmin but it didn’t take long until he returned the kiss. He places his hands on Sungmin’s waist and the latter slowly puts his arms around Hyukjae’s neck. They both deepen the kiss, making out right there until they heard a knock. They instantly pull away and straightened their clothes. “Your parents?”
--
“Hey. I’m sorry to make you wait.”
He looks up to see a cute boy in a pink shirt with a very beautiful smile. He instantly leans closer, giving the boy a kiss. The latter blushes right away which made Hyukjae pinched his cheeks lightly. “Let’s go?”
Sungmin nods his head as they began walking side by side. After a few seconds, Hyukjae’s hand is entwined in his. He is used to this. It’s like he needs to hold Sungmin’s hand because it keeps him warm every single time.
It’s been months or so since they’ve been in this kind of relationship. They aren’t exactly together since Hyukjae isn’t ready to commit yet. They are more than friends, less than lovers. They’ve settled in this kind of situation - a pseudo relationship. They are special to each other yet they don’t have commitment.
“Are we going to watch a movie Hyuk?”
“Yup. We’ll watch a movie then have a dinner and a walk in a park?”
“Sounds perfect.”
They enter the train which is jam-packed. Hyukjae groans as other guys keep on bumping at Sungmin. He corners Sungmin near the door to protect him from other guys. Sungmin can’t help but to hold onto him as he embraces him tight. Hyukjae regrets not taking his car in an instant.
After half an hour, they arrive at the cinema. Hyukjae lets Sungmin choose whichever movie he likes. Hyukjae tries so hard to resist Sungmin because this day would be the last day he’ll treat him like this. This thing for him is only a game. They are just playing - a fling. He must stop everything today because the person he truly likes already wanted to give himself to him. He knows it’s unfair. He knows that it might hurt Sungmin. But at the end of the day, they aren’t really together. That’s the only reason for him to escape this because they aren’t committed. He can just drop him like that.
--
“The sunset sure is pretty.” Sungmin lovingly stares at the beautiful sunset. He loves this day because it’s another day with Hyukjae. Sungmin knows the consequences of their relationship. At first, it was just a fling for him - they give each other that feeling - sexual and comfort but no attachment. Hyukjae isn’t ready to commit and Sungmin wants to have fun so they agreed with this kind of set-up after making out so many times. He found Hyukjae and the warm feeling he gives is so irresistible.
“Min.” Hyukjae slightly taps Sungmin’s shoulder. The latter glances at his side and smiles. “Hm?”
“We need to stop this.”
“Stop what?”
“This thing. I can’t see you like this anymore. I need to be with Donghae.” Hyukjae can’t even make an eye contact with Sungmin because he’s feeling guilty. Although he doesn’t know what Sungmin’s true feelings are, he knows that it might at least hurt him for unexpectedly stopping like this. After all, they’ve been in this situation for months.
Sungmin’s smile fades as those words came out from Hyukjae. Like Hyukjae, Sungmin isn’t sure about Hyukjae’s feelings but he hoped that they will be together at least and be in a real relationship once Hyukjae is ready because he thought, in those times they spent together; Hyukjae will fall for him too like how Hyukjae captured his heart. He wants to be with him. He hoped but hearing those words that moment makes his heart sinks in pain, his heart breaks in pieces, his heart - the heart that already fell in love with Hyukjae is stepped on by the person who already owns it.
Donghae is Hyukjae’s best friend, first love and everything. He’s the reason why Hyukjae isn’t ready to commit because it’s not with Donghae but just recently, Donghae confessed his feelings for him and he wanted to just say yes until he remembered about his thing with Sungmin.
“But you said-”
“Yes. I said I wasn’t ready because I’m waiting for Donghae.”
Sungmin wants to just break down right then and there. He never imagined this coming too soon especially now, not now that he already fell deeply in love with him.
“You really love him more?”
“I only love him, Sungmin.” Those words are like daggers that hit his heart and mind so hard. ‘I only love him’ means he didn’t even love him in the first place. He doesn’t even take a second glance at him. He holds back his tears - afraid to look so vulnerable in front of him.
“So, this is the e-end of us?”
“There’s no us Min. It’s only you and me from the start. We’re not even together right? So I’m telling you, I can’t do this anymore.” With those words, Sungmin lost it. His tears flow nonstop. Hyukjae’s heart is also breaking seeing him so weak that moment.
“You are so mean Hyuk! You are so mean!” ‘You made me feel like this… I already love you idiot.’
--
Weeks passed by and Sungmin buries himself to bed, crying helplessly. He doesn’t want to go to school anymore because he would only see Hyukjae being so happy with someone else. He wants to make an excuse that he’s sick but his mom doesn’t buy it. He’s forced to go.
He takes his time to walk to school, not caring whether he’ll be late or he’ll be scolded by his teacher. He takes his time, walking like a lifeless person.
Out of nowhere, his friend Kyuhyun appears but he didn’t even notice until the younger spoke.
“Hey…”
“Hm.” Kyuhyun looks at him with pity as Sungmin is like a living dead. He’s just staring in space and walking carelessly.
“You love him so much huh?”
“Yeah…”
“I told you it will only hurt you in the end, right?”
“Yeah…”
“And you didn’t listen to me…”
“Yeah…”
“You know you look ridiculous.”
“Yeah…”
Kyuhyun can’t stand seeing him like this anymore. He warned him every single chance he had just to prevent this kind of thing to happen but Sungmin never listened. He said, “I just want to enjoy while it last because it’s making me happy.” But Kyuhyun told him, “But you can be happy with the real thing hyung not with this fake relationship.” And he still didn’t listen. Now, he is a pathetic broken hearted guy.
“I told you that in this game of love, if you fall in love, you lose.”
Sungmin knows that he lost because he fell in love first and the worst thing, Hyukjae isn’t. The relationship he had with Hyukjae might be a fake one but all the emotions felt are real. He loves him damn much.
“How can you call it love when you’re crying more than smiling?”
Sungmin abruptly stops. True. He’s been crying for weeks over a stupid one-sided love. All the memories he had with Hyukjae faded in an instant as he can only remember that one night he told him off. He hates it that he’s never enough. He hates how Hyukjae didn’t love him back because he’s not Donghae. He hates it. He breaks down and cry but Kyuhyun pulls his wrist and envelopes him in a warm embrace. “Don’t cry anymore hyung. You deserve to be happy.”
“I’m sorry if I’m not enough.” He whispers.
--
A/N:
I apologize for making Hyukjae the mean one here... I'm still thinking if I could make a sequel of this for my hyukmin challenge so there...