Fic: To Touch the Stars Above
Title: To Touch the Stars Above
Author:
angelqueen04
Summary: Six days, twelve hours, and forty-four minutes; that was how long it had been.
Type / Pairings: John/Elizabeth
Main characters: John Sheppard, Elizabeth Weir
Rating: PG Warnings: Character Death... sort of.
Spoilers: general spoilers for Seasons 1 and 2, I suppose.
Beta:
writerrising
Disclaimer: Stargate Atlantis and its characters belong to their respective owners. I make no claim or profit on the writing of this story, only creative enjoyment.
Author's Notes: This story was partially inspired by
irony_rocks' story, Salvation. Irony, you might recognize some of my more persistent hopes in this fic. ;)
Feedback: is love!
Six days, twelve hours, and forty-four minutes; that was how long it had been, if John recalled correctly, and he was fairly certain that he did. It had been that long since they had watched the signal on their life sign detectors that represented Elizabeth Weir disappear from the screen. Ever since then, no one seemed to know exactly what to do with themselves.
Rodney had locked himself in his lab in an apparent attempt to work himself to death, trying to drown his grief in the safety of cold, scientific facts. John's original stance had been to just let him stay there and work himself out in his own way; but when hours turned to days and Rodney hadn't come out, he'd been forced to take action. The lab was sealed, forcing several technicians to work like hell to override the codes. John had then entered with Ronon and Carson, only to find the scientist fast asleep at his lab table, drool slipping out of the corner of his mouth and his cheeks streaked with dried tears.
Teyla had grown quiet, her eyes far away. After the initial dust had settled, she departed for the mainland, accompanied by Ronon, to inform her people of what had happened. The Athosians had offered to hold a ceremony, to honor Elizabeth's memory and all she had striven to do. John had given them the go-ahead. If it brought them some measure of comfort, all John felt he could do was not stand in their way and try not to feel envious, knowing he would find no solace in it.
Ronon had also had been quiet, but that wasn't unusual for him. Most would probably say that he didn't seem at all affected, but John knew him well enough to see the weariness present in the slight slump of his shoulders and in the man's normally-inscrutable eyes.
No one was taking Elizabeth's... passing very well. People avoided one another, laughter was nonexistent. Even now, almost a week later, people were still crying in the hallways. Life had stopped. When people did interact, nerves were short and frayed. Kavanaugh had the look of a hunted animal, given that every time he did speak, everyone near him was watching him like a hawk, as though daring him to even say Elizabeth's name. John had little doubt that if the acerbic scientist did shoot his mouth off, the scientists would beat the military members to him.
As for John himself, well, he hadn't had a single dream since he listened over the radio, helpless, as her breathing hitched before stopping all together. It was weird. He'd expected to see her in his nightmares, covered in blood, reaching towards him weakly as she begged him to help her. He expected to hear accusations hurled at him, or even to see Sumner and all the others whose deaths he'd caused. But all he saw was inky blackness.
He wanted to blame someone, something, anything, for what had happened. But in the end there was no one to blame except perhaps the city itself. It had been a freak accident; no one could have predicted that the floor in that particular section of the city would collapse the moment she stepped on it to see something one of the exploration teams had found. She had been buried alive beneath tons of steel, though she still had her radio with her, enabling her to maintain contact. For all the good it had done them...
"John... Don't think..."
"Dammit, Elizabeth!" He shouted into his radio, watching as the recovery team worked frantically to dig their way through the twisted metal. "Hold on! We're coming!"
"John... it's beautiful..."
He glanced at Carson, who stood with a medical team next to him. He was also holding a life sign detector, monitoring Elizabeth's vitals. Carson's blue eyes came up and met his. "She's delirious, Colonel," he said, his voice almost lost in the noise. "Her vitals are failing."
"John... stars... close... touch... let go..."
A hitched breath, almost like a rattle.
Then there was nothing.
And the entire city seemed to grow dim.
The recovery teams had continued to work, all of them determined to bring Elizabeth's body out of the depths of the city to give her the proper burial that she deserved. There was just so much debris to wade through. They were now fairly certain, though, that they would be reaching her body today. So, he, along with Carson, Ronon, Teyla, and Rodney, stood behind the recovery teams as they finished moving aside the last of the debris.
He clenched his teeth, steeling himself for what was probably going to be a horrific sight. John almost wished he was back up in the Control Room with Major Lorne, waiting for the news of the recovery, instead of being down here. He really would have preferred his last visual memory of Elizabeth to be as he saw her before she started her final journey: standing out on the balcony with him, laughing and shaking her head over some sly comment he'd made about something he couldn't even remember now.
He'd always been somewhat aware of how beautiful she was, though in the beginning, he had deliberately ignored the fact. She was his commander, not a potential girlfriend. Not to mention, she was the one who had offered him a second chance at doing something worthwhile, instead of sitting and rotting away on a frozen continent where his superiors had hastily stashed him after Afghanistan. But in those last moments on the balcony, her shoulder-length curls fluttering in the light wind, the thoughts he'd initially suppressed returned in full force. To coin a cliché, she stole his breath away.
And then Atlantis had stolen her away.
"Sir?"
John blinked and focused on the soldier standing in front of him. "Yes, sergeant?"
The younger man looked him square in the eye and said stiffly, "We're just about there. Only a few more feet to go." His voice was so tight that it almost shuddered beneath the suppressed emotion.
John nodded slowly. "Right. I guess we're as ready as we'll ever be."
The sergeant moved aside, giving John an unobstructed view of the rest of the recovery team shoving aside the last of the debris. When the last slab of metal was moved, however, they did not find what they expected.
Instead of Elizabeth's broken body, they saw only a crisp golden light moving out straight at them.
Everyone's instincts were too finely honed for them to do anything other than scramble back away from it. But even as John's hands automatically brought his P-90 up to bear, he recalled seeing such a light not once, but twice before.
Chaya. Teer. Both in their Ascended forms.
Was it possible?
As they watched, the mass of light hovered in front of them for several seconds before lowering down to the floor. Then the light coalesced into a familiar form, eliciting several gasps from those gathered around."Elizabeth?!"
She stood before them tall and proud. Instead of being clad in a ripped and bloody uniform, she wore a deep, burgundy red dress that seemed to sparkle; her dark curls framed her healthy face and dancing eyes.
She smiled at them, and it didn't matter how many women had smiled at him before. John knew it was the sweetest, most beautiful smile he had ever seen.
"Thank you," she said. To him, her voice sounded like the wind chimes his grandmother used to have all around the large farmhouse she and his grandfather had lived in. "Thank you for coming for me, but I'm afraid it's time for me to go."
"How," Carson stuttered from John's left, "How is that possible? Y-You're..."
Her smile only grew brighter, if that was possible. "Atlantis looks after her children, Carson. She did not mean for this to happen, but it happened all the same. So, she took steps to right it in the only way she knew how."
She looked at all of them. "I just wanted to thank you." Her eyes then locked with John's and he felt as though he was staring at the night sky that the two of them had observed together so many times. "You have done more for me than I can ever repay. You mean more to me..."
Elizabeth trailed off. Shaking her head slightly, she slowly started to glow as she began to walk away.
"Wait." John blinked when he realized it had been his voice that spoke. He continued to stare at her as she turned her head to gaze at him.
"Where are you going?"
For a moment, she did not react, as though she was considering his question.
"Anywhere."
She turned again to face them all fully as the glow that surrounded her grew brighter.
"Everywhere."
It became so bright that her body was no longer even visible. Only her face remained as she beamed directly at him.
"Nowhere."
Then her face was gone, engulfed by the white light. The ethereal form that he knew was still Elizabeth moved toward them. It... she whirled around them, touching all of them. Not that John really noticed. All he was aware of was the sensation of fingers gently caressing his face, of soft lips brushing his own. He closed his eyes, trying to memorize the sensation, to make it last forever.
The light behind his eyelids grew dimmer after several moments and his eyes flew open to see her moving swiftly down the hallway, back towards the central areas of the city.
"... Sheppard, I repeat, this is Major Lorne. Do you copy? We're detecting a huge energy surge coming right at us. Colonel Sheppard? Orders, sir?"
Slowly, his hand came up to activate his radio, his eyes still resting where he had last seen Elizabeth. "Major, this is Sheppard. You are let that energy pass you by. I repeat, do not impede it in any way."
"Sir, you sure? We might - What the..."
John could hear the Stargate activating in the background. "It's all right, Major. Let her go."
Lorne did not reply, but John was confident that his orders would be obeyed. He glanced around at his companions, only to find them all dazed. Rodney kept blinking in confusion, looking back towards the pile of ruined metal and then back down the hallway where Elizabeth had vanished. Carson looked rather shell-shocked. Teyla and Ronon were both staring silently down the hallway and John could see the bright sheen in the Athosian leader's eyes, the rapid blinking of the former Runner‘. He then glanced over at the recovery team, seeing them shaking their heads and rubbing at their eyes.
"Uh, Colonel? The... light? It's gone, sir. It activated the Gate and went through."
"Copy that, Major," he replied. "We're on our way back now."
The group obeyed his words and began walking down the hallway in silence. Watching them all move ahead of him, John stopped for a moment and closed his eyes.
She was gone, but she wasn't. He could still feel her, could still feel the touch of her hand, the feel of her lips.
Elizabeth was still here. Maybe she always would be.
Cross-posted to my lj,
john_elizabeth and
lostcityfound.
Author:
angelqueen04
Summary: Six days, twelve hours, and forty-four minutes; that was how long it had been.
Type / Pairings: John/Elizabeth
Main characters: John Sheppard, Elizabeth Weir
Rating: PG Warnings: Character Death... sort of.
Spoilers: general spoilers for Seasons 1 and 2, I suppose.
Beta:
writerrising
Disclaimer: Stargate Atlantis and its characters belong to their respective owners. I make no claim or profit on the writing of this story, only creative enjoyment.
Author's Notes: This story was partially inspired by
irony_rocks' story, Salvation. Irony, you might recognize some of my more persistent hopes in this fic. ;)
Feedback: is love!
Six days, twelve hours, and forty-four minutes; that was how long it had been, if John recalled correctly, and he was fairly certain that he did. It had been that long since they had watched the signal on their life sign detectors that represented Elizabeth Weir disappear from the screen. Ever since then, no one seemed to know exactly what to do with themselves.
Rodney had locked himself in his lab in an apparent attempt to work himself to death, trying to drown his grief in the safety of cold, scientific facts. John's original stance had been to just let him stay there and work himself out in his own way; but when hours turned to days and Rodney hadn't come out, he'd been forced to take action. The lab was sealed, forcing several technicians to work like hell to override the codes. John had then entered with Ronon and Carson, only to find the scientist fast asleep at his lab table, drool slipping out of the corner of his mouth and his cheeks streaked with dried tears.
Teyla had grown quiet, her eyes far away. After the initial dust had settled, she departed for the mainland, accompanied by Ronon, to inform her people of what had happened. The Athosians had offered to hold a ceremony, to honor Elizabeth's memory and all she had striven to do. John had given them the go-ahead. If it brought them some measure of comfort, all John felt he could do was not stand in their way and try not to feel envious, knowing he would find no solace in it.
Ronon had also had been quiet, but that wasn't unusual for him. Most would probably say that he didn't seem at all affected, but John knew him well enough to see the weariness present in the slight slump of his shoulders and in the man's normally-inscrutable eyes.
No one was taking Elizabeth's... passing very well. People avoided one another, laughter was nonexistent. Even now, almost a week later, people were still crying in the hallways. Life had stopped. When people did interact, nerves were short and frayed. Kavanaugh had the look of a hunted animal, given that every time he did speak, everyone near him was watching him like a hawk, as though daring him to even say Elizabeth's name. John had little doubt that if the acerbic scientist did shoot his mouth off, the scientists would beat the military members to him.
As for John himself, well, he hadn't had a single dream since he listened over the radio, helpless, as her breathing hitched before stopping all together. It was weird. He'd expected to see her in his nightmares, covered in blood, reaching towards him weakly as she begged him to help her. He expected to hear accusations hurled at him, or even to see Sumner and all the others whose deaths he'd caused. But all he saw was inky blackness.
He wanted to blame someone, something, anything, for what had happened. But in the end there was no one to blame except perhaps the city itself. It had been a freak accident; no one could have predicted that the floor in that particular section of the city would collapse the moment she stepped on it to see something one of the exploration teams had found. She had been buried alive beneath tons of steel, though she still had her radio with her, enabling her to maintain contact. For all the good it had done them...
"John... Don't think..."
"Dammit, Elizabeth!" He shouted into his radio, watching as the recovery team worked frantically to dig their way through the twisted metal. "Hold on! We're coming!"
"John... it's beautiful..."
He glanced at Carson, who stood with a medical team next to him. He was also holding a life sign detector, monitoring Elizabeth's vitals. Carson's blue eyes came up and met his. "She's delirious, Colonel," he said, his voice almost lost in the noise. "Her vitals are failing."
"John... stars... close... touch... let go..."
A hitched breath, almost like a rattle.
Then there was nothing.
And the entire city seemed to grow dim.
The recovery teams had continued to work, all of them determined to bring Elizabeth's body out of the depths of the city to give her the proper burial that she deserved. There was just so much debris to wade through. They were now fairly certain, though, that they would be reaching her body today. So, he, along with Carson, Ronon, Teyla, and Rodney, stood behind the recovery teams as they finished moving aside the last of the debris.
He clenched his teeth, steeling himself for what was probably going to be a horrific sight. John almost wished he was back up in the Control Room with Major Lorne, waiting for the news of the recovery, instead of being down here. He really would have preferred his last visual memory of Elizabeth to be as he saw her before she started her final journey: standing out on the balcony with him, laughing and shaking her head over some sly comment he'd made about something he couldn't even remember now.
He'd always been somewhat aware of how beautiful she was, though in the beginning, he had deliberately ignored the fact. She was his commander, not a potential girlfriend. Not to mention, she was the one who had offered him a second chance at doing something worthwhile, instead of sitting and rotting away on a frozen continent where his superiors had hastily stashed him after Afghanistan. But in those last moments on the balcony, her shoulder-length curls fluttering in the light wind, the thoughts he'd initially suppressed returned in full force. To coin a cliché, she stole his breath away.
And then Atlantis had stolen her away.
"Sir?"
John blinked and focused on the soldier standing in front of him. "Yes, sergeant?"
The younger man looked him square in the eye and said stiffly, "We're just about there. Only a few more feet to go." His voice was so tight that it almost shuddered beneath the suppressed emotion.
John nodded slowly. "Right. I guess we're as ready as we'll ever be."
The sergeant moved aside, giving John an unobstructed view of the rest of the recovery team shoving aside the last of the debris. When the last slab of metal was moved, however, they did not find what they expected.
Instead of Elizabeth's broken body, they saw only a crisp golden light moving out straight at them.
Everyone's instincts were too finely honed for them to do anything other than scramble back away from it. But even as John's hands automatically brought his P-90 up to bear, he recalled seeing such a light not once, but twice before.
Chaya. Teer. Both in their Ascended forms.
Was it possible?
As they watched, the mass of light hovered in front of them for several seconds before lowering down to the floor. Then the light coalesced into a familiar form, eliciting several gasps from those gathered around."Elizabeth?!"
She stood before them tall and proud. Instead of being clad in a ripped and bloody uniform, she wore a deep, burgundy red dress that seemed to sparkle; her dark curls framed her healthy face and dancing eyes.
She smiled at them, and it didn't matter how many women had smiled at him before. John knew it was the sweetest, most beautiful smile he had ever seen.
"Thank you," she said. To him, her voice sounded like the wind chimes his grandmother used to have all around the large farmhouse she and his grandfather had lived in. "Thank you for coming for me, but I'm afraid it's time for me to go."
"How," Carson stuttered from John's left, "How is that possible? Y-You're..."
Her smile only grew brighter, if that was possible. "Atlantis looks after her children, Carson. She did not mean for this to happen, but it happened all the same. So, she took steps to right it in the only way she knew how."
She looked at all of them. "I just wanted to thank you." Her eyes then locked with John's and he felt as though he was staring at the night sky that the two of them had observed together so many times. "You have done more for me than I can ever repay. You mean more to me..."
Elizabeth trailed off. Shaking her head slightly, she slowly started to glow as she began to walk away.
"Wait." John blinked when he realized it had been his voice that spoke. He continued to stare at her as she turned her head to gaze at him.
"Where are you going?"
For a moment, she did not react, as though she was considering his question.
"Anywhere."
She turned again to face them all fully as the glow that surrounded her grew brighter.
"Everywhere."
It became so bright that her body was no longer even visible. Only her face remained as she beamed directly at him.
"Nowhere."
Then her face was gone, engulfed by the white light. The ethereal form that he knew was still Elizabeth moved toward them. It... she whirled around them, touching all of them. Not that John really noticed. All he was aware of was the sensation of fingers gently caressing his face, of soft lips brushing his own. He closed his eyes, trying to memorize the sensation, to make it last forever.
The light behind his eyelids grew dimmer after several moments and his eyes flew open to see her moving swiftly down the hallway, back towards the central areas of the city.
"... Sheppard, I repeat, this is Major Lorne. Do you copy? We're detecting a huge energy surge coming right at us. Colonel Sheppard? Orders, sir?"
Slowly, his hand came up to activate his radio, his eyes still resting where he had last seen Elizabeth. "Major, this is Sheppard. You are let that energy pass you by. I repeat, do not impede it in any way."
"Sir, you sure? We might - What the..."
John could hear the Stargate activating in the background. "It's all right, Major. Let her go."
Lorne did not reply, but John was confident that his orders would be obeyed. He glanced around at his companions, only to find them all dazed. Rodney kept blinking in confusion, looking back towards the pile of ruined metal and then back down the hallway where Elizabeth had vanished. Carson looked rather shell-shocked. Teyla and Ronon were both staring silently down the hallway and John could see the bright sheen in the Athosian leader's eyes, the rapid blinking of the former Runner‘. He then glanced over at the recovery team, seeing them shaking their heads and rubbing at their eyes.
"Uh, Colonel? The... light? It's gone, sir. It activated the Gate and went through."
"Copy that, Major," he replied. "We're on our way back now."
The group obeyed his words and began walking down the hallway in silence. Watching them all move ahead of him, John stopped for a moment and closed his eyes.
She was gone, but she wasn't. He could still feel her, could still feel the touch of her hand, the feel of her lips.
Elizabeth was still here. Maybe she always would be.
Cross-posted to my lj,
john_elizabeth and
lostcityfound.